#pharchive

will update this post when anyone offers the other ones im missing. i own every one since 2018 so im using my copies (yes i checked the wiki it doesnt have the dates just the photos)

ive spelt all the hebrew words the way i say them which is very ashki so feel free to ask me what anything means. which means ive changed "hanukkah" (how dnp have spelt it) to "chanukah" and also i changed "passover" to "pesach" because i get pissy about that one. "chag" means "festival" and "chagim" means "festivals"

i havent included any english (gregorian) dates in the spreadsheet because thats not really relevant to what i wanted to see with this.

the chagim ive included are the yomim noraim and the shalosh regallim because those are the big important ones plus anything else that has made it into a dnp calendar. which means chanukah is on there of course. purim also made it. but the one i cant wrap my head around is hoshana rabbah ?? thats the last day of succos its not its own chag ?? but its in the post haitus calendars for some reason ?? and succos itself isnt in any of them it makes no sense. my guess is that someone mixed it up with rosh hashanah (actually important chag) and decided it needed to be in there. just for reference the jewish calendar has something every single month (if you include sigd) so ive cut down the list quite a bit. ive also ordered the chagim starting from january instead of tishrei which was painful for me to do but obviously makes sense for this spreadsheet.

just to explain the dates: in the gregorian calendar the date changes over at midnight right? but in the jewish calendar it changes over at sundown. so in the winter over here it becomes tomorrow at like 3pm. when ive inputted the dates from the calendars ive used the date from the morning (this is how most calendars that have gregorian and jewish do it). because of this, most of the chagim on dnps calendars are a day early. theres still some that are not though. no consistency there. when i explain the chagim in english dates to peaople ill usually say something like "today is the first night of chanukah. tomorrow is the first day and second night" to avoid all this confusion but the dnp calendars always say "first day of hanukkah" the day before so. lol.

some chagim are different in israel and the rest of the world. the only relevant difference for this spreadsheet is that shavuos is two days in the diaspora and one day in israel. ive put two days on the spreadsheet but it doesnt really matter because dnp have never put shavuos in their calendars.

its interesting to me that shavuos and succos are not in any dnp calendar. i assume they are less known to goyim because theres no xtian or secular "equivalent". shavuos doesnt fall into the nice pattern of jewish xmas or jewish easter or jewish new year or whatever bullshit so they just dont get talked about (yes im annoyed about this can you tell).

the big errors in the dnp calendars are: 1. rosh hashanah 2024 is only one day long. and 2. chanukah 2025 has no end date. in their other calendars theyve put the first and last day in. i woulda preferred they put all eight days in. its possible this error happened because they could have copied the festivals from the 2024 calendar and chanukah didnt end until january that year so the last day was not in the 2024 calendar either.

also also the 2018 dogs calendar has the monthly moon phases in it. which means you should be able to infer the rosh chodesh dates from it. im counting that as another win for jewish phannies. dont know why they stopped doing that in the newer calendars it was funnnn.