#phangirlof

Pairing: Willhelm x Simon

Word Count: 7451

Summary: Picks up Two years after season1 of Young Royals. Simon decides it’s best to break things off and move on despite that being the last thing either him or Willhelm want to do.

Two years. Simon tried to hold back tears as his thoughts kept racing to places he couldn't get them away from. For the last two years he’d been Willhelm’s dirty little secret. His hidden trophy. The toy he kept selfishly from the rest of the kids. At first it was much easier to push these thoughts to the side but now? After countless secret sleepovers and meet ups. Short lived glances in the hallways or across the lunch table. He was so tired of feeling guilty and ashamed of himself, as if he was doing something wrong. Like some part of who he was was dirty. 

He loved that boy with everything in him. From his heart to his soul and everything else in between. No one he’d ever met had even come close to making him feel the way Wilhelm did, but at the same time no one had quite broken his spirit as much as he did either. 

“If you loved me I wouldn’t feel like this Wille. If you loved me like you say you do then I wouldn’t have to lie about our relationship to the whole world. I want someone to love me unconditionally and wholeheartedly and not worry about the consequences. They love me and they would stop at nothing or no one to love me. And I know that you can’t do that.” 

“But I do. I really really do Simon. I’ve never loved anyone the way I love you.”

“It’s okay, I know it’s not your fault.” 

The look in Willhelm’s eyes was slowly ripping Simon’s heart to shreds. All he wanted was to stay strong and get through this conversation. Move on and finally close the door on this chapter of his life. He was tired of hurting but hurting Wilhelm was truly the last thing he wanted to do. 

“Please Si, don’t do this. Give me just a little more time and I’ll make everything right. I promise.” The tears continued to fall and Wilhelm didn’t care to wipe them away. 

“I love you. I always will but for my own sanity I just can’t do this anymore.”

Simon gathered his belongings and started to make his way home, leaving Wilhelm behind. What had started out as a nice day alone, the two boys laying around on a blanket hidden away at a park nearby Simon’s house turned into the one thing Simon never anticipated. Their breakup. The further away he walked, the more tears of his own cascaded along his cheeks. Although he wanted nothing more than to turn around and run back into Wilhelm’s arms, he knew this was for the best, despite how shitty and broken he felt. 

In the distance he could hear Willhelm calling his name. Simon didn’t know what else could be said but he turned around anyway. 

“I will do whatever it takes to be with you.” Simon didn’t know how to respond so he just gave the other boy a weak smile and carried on the way he came. 

It’d been months since he last talked to Willhelm. Some days were easier than others. Some days he was really busy with classes, studying extra hard especially with graduation closer than ever, and the rowing team. Now that August was gone, Simon had been voted team captain and he had more responsibility than ever. But it was days like this that got to him the worst. Days where he was all caught up on homework and all of his friends were too busy to hangout. Days where he had nothing to keep his thoughts occupied. 

It would start with small memories like their first kiss or when they first met. The way he caught Willhelm’s attention and held onto which always resulted in an adorable, pink blush spreading across Willhelm’s face and him sheepishly looking away. Then he would move on to thinking about their first sleepover at his house. They were so excited to spend so much alone time together, they accidentally stayed up all night talking. No matter how many good memories came to mind, everything always ended up going back to the sex scandal and how alone he felt when Willhelm denied all the rumors. 

A knock on Simon’s door gratefully interrupted his thoughts. He reached for his phone, turning the music down he had originally turned on to ease his thoughts. “Simon, it’s Sara. Open up!” Sara shouted after knocking once more. A small grin took over his face. “I’m coming, I’m coming. Don’t be so impatient.” He rolled out of bed to let her in. 

“Hello.” She said. Sara gave Simon a little wave as she entered the room and plopped down on his bed. “Hey Sara, what are you doing here? Not that I don’t enjoy your company.” Simon said, taking claim of the other side of the bed. “I thought you were going to a party with Felice tonight.”

“I am, but I wanted to see if you’d come too.” Despite the overwhelming urge to just stay in his room, Simon knew it was much better than being stuck thinking about things he couldn’t change. “Umm, yeah. I’d love to. What time does it start?” He asked. 

“I think about an hour ago.” She said with a quick shoulder shrug. Simon couldn’t help but laugh. “And you waited ‘til after the party started to see if I wanted to go?” 

“Yeah, I kinda forgot about the party so when Felice called I told her I was waiting on you to get ready. She’s waiting on us downstairs so I need you to hurry up.” Simon shook his head and continued to laugh. 

“Okay well get out so I can change and I’ll be down there soon.” Sara left without another word. Simon looked through piles of clothes trying to decide what to wear. He hadn’t been out in so long he had no clue what to wear. After a brief moment of panic he decided he would wear something simple. A plain t-shirt and jeans. It’s not like I have anyone to impress. Simon pushed the thought aside and finished getting ready. His final touches were a couple of bracelets, a chain, and a spritz of cologne. The last thing he did before he left for the night was shove his phone in his pocket and cut off his bedroom lights and with that he was on his way to the party.

***

Simon’s head was killing him. He’d gotten way too drunk way too fast and now he was paying for it. He couldn’t go too long without throwing up. Not to mention every time he tried to stand up his vision blurred and he ended right back on the floor. In all of the party hype he’d also managed to lose Sara and Felice. Gratefully for him he’d managed to find the bathroom which is exactly where he had spent most of his night. Hugged up to one of the nastiest toilets he’d ever seen was the quietest place he’d been since he arrived at this party, not that he was complaining. 

Simon patiently waited for everything to stop spinning and his stomach to settle before he tried to get up again. Once he was up and moving, he slowly made his way back to the party. To his shock the teenage chaos had settled down some. Usually these parties would go on the whole weekend. Whoever was in charge of the music had completely changed the vibe. Before he left they were blaring loud, bass heavy rap music and now it was smooth r&b. It was very soothing to him. Now Simon could actually hear himself think.

“There y-you are, we’ve been l-looking for you!” Sara slurred, latching Simon into a drunken side hug. Felice tried to gently pull her off so they could talk. “Really, where have you been? We looked all over for you!” Felice exclaimed. She was nowhere near as drunk as Simon or Sara. “I got really d-dizzy and s-sick. I don’t know how I got there, but I ended up in the b-bathroom.” Simon replied, sending a lazy gesture towards the men’s room he’d just left. 

“Well I’m glad you’re okay, but I guess that means you haven’t heard.” Felice’s entire demeanor changed once she finished her sentence. Simon looked at her puzzled. “What do you m-mean? Have I heard w-what?” Felice silently took out her phone and handed it to him. 

Upon first glance Simon had no clue what he was looking at. His eyes just wouldn’t focus in, but after a moment of struggling he finally got it. It was someone’s instagram. Simon checked the username. It was Willhelm’s account. The post itself was nothing but a black screen, however Simon came to realize that the caption was what was important. 

Hello. Willhelm here. Against my mother’s wishes I have two announcements to make. My first announcement is my coming out. I’m gay. Yep, the crown prince is gay. Someone very important to me made it clear that a life of hiding who I really am to keep up a fake persona is not one worth living, so I won’t be living it anymore. I hurt the most important person in my life trying to please everyone else and this is only the first step to make it up to them. I’m proud to be who I am and from here on out I will always be proud and open about it. Now that that’s out of the way my second announcement is to let everyone of Sweden know that I am stepping down from my position of Crown Prince. I’m well aware that after the passing of my brother, it was my duty to take his place, but it was never what I wanted. All I ever wanted was to be a normal kid and to live a normal life and that’s exactly what I intend to do. Thank you for reading, but for now this is all I have to say. 

Simon just kept reading the long message over and over again. He was racking his brain just trying to understand exactly what Willhelm had done. He finally publicly came out. He told the entire world that he was gay. The two had had too many conversations about this although Simon never thought Willhelm would ever actually be able to. He was the crown prince of Sweden after all. He had a certain prestigious, good boy image to keep up and his mother made it very clear what he was and wasn’t allowed to share with the public.

It was the second part of the message that Simon really had trouble wrapping his brain around. Willhelm was stepping down? Is that allowed? Is there anyone else to take his place? There’s no way in hell his mother will actually allow this. Simon had so many thoughts racing through his head. He just couldn’t make sense of it all. 

“Simon, Simon?” Felice was snapping her fingers in front of him, trying to get his attention. “Are you okay?”

“I,” Simon was at a complete loss for words. And thoughts. And feelings. He had no idea what this meant or if this even meant anything for him. “don’t know.” Surely Willhelm didn’t do this for him. Too much time had passed since he’d even laid eyes on him. There was no way he did this for him. 

Simon closed his eyes. He needed just one moment to think. This was too much for him to handle right now. He’d spent these last few months trying to convince himself that Wilhelm was well on his way to moving on. He kept trying to beat it into his brain that their break up was for the best and that everything would be okay. That he was on his way to moving on too. However all it took was some stupid instagram post to ruin all his progress. 

Felice hooked one arm around Sara and the other around Simon.“Hey Simon, let’s get you back to the dorms.” Simon opened his eyes and shook his head in agreement. The longer he stayed at this party, the harder it got to breathe. He knew he was being ridiculous, nevertheless it felt like everyone was staring at him. It felt like everyone had read the same thing he did, but they knew he was the reason behind it all. 

Maybe it was his lack of attention or maybe it was all the shortcuts Felice was taking, but Simon was back in his room in no time. Felice had gotten him everything he could need before she left. A cold bottle of water and a back up one for later, a trash can, and a couple of snacks. He was starving. After the party and Wilhelm’s bombshell announcement, he’d barely realized he hadn’t eaten anything all night. He had other things on his mind right now. He had millions of questions. All in all, he was still having a hard time comprehending exactly what had happened tonight. 

After all, what was the point of all this? As far as he knew Wilhelm was finally accepting all his royal responsibilities. The last few times they were together, Wilhelm actually seemed kinda excited. In fact he’d been doing so well with representing the royal family and behaving himself (to the Queen’s standards of course), the Queen herself was quite impressed. Simon didn’t know when things changed for Wilhelm, or why he might be the turning point for him. 

Simon sighed and reached into his pocket for his phone. It was six am. He was exhausted. Tonight had been way too much for him to handle. Earlier that night was the drunkest he’d been since his first year of Hillerska. Simon put his phone on the charger and not long after he set it down he fell asleep.

***

“Hello darling, how’s your food?” Simon’s mother asked him as she took her place across the dining room table. 

“Amazing, as always. Your cooking never disappoints!” He’d said with a full face grin. After the whirlwind of emotions and events that had occurred this past weekend, Simon decided it'd be best if he just came home and spent some quality time with his mom. He loved coming home. It always felt as though his mother had a special  way of making all his worries disappear. 

He appreciated his father springing out the money to secure him and Sara dorms at Hillerska, but sometimes he preferred staying with his mother. He had everything he needed here. He didn’t want to argue with his father, so he just let him do this and thanked him for his kindness. Getting them in the dorms was the first big thing he’d done for them in a very long time. He just let his father have that little victory and just came home whenever he needed.

“Thank you love, how is school coming along?”

“Good. A little tough right now, overall good. Classes feel like they're never ending with homework and projects, but it’s nothing I can’t handle.” Simon replied.

“Well it seems to be that you have a good outlook on things. How is the rowing team coming along? Do you guys know when your next event is?”

“We don’t know an exact date yet, however we think there should be another next month. If we win that one we’ll qualify for regionals. That’s the one we’ll travel for. Regionals ”

“That’s great Simon. Make sure to let me know when everything is, so I can request off from work. I’ve been picking up extra shifts, and we can turn regionals into a whole little family vacation. If you’re up for it.” 

I smiled at my mom. The thought of a getaway was amazing. We hadn’t gone anywhere just to enjoy things and relax as a family since I was younger. “I love that.”

My mother and I carried on a conversation for a while. We continued talking about our future vacation plans and all the things we could do. It was just so nice to be here with her. Being home always brought me to peace. Eventually we ended up finishing dinner. I helped my mother clear the table and put away the leftovers. I washed the dirty dishes as Mom dried them and put them away. We took place in the living room. As we continued to chat, I reached for the tv remote. 

“What would you like to watch?” I said. Once the tv came to life, I noticed it was on a news channel.

“Anything’s fine with me dear.” Mom replied. 

I was about to change the channel when something caught my attention. Footage of a car wreck flashed across the screen. It was a terrible pile up with many vehicles involved. 

“Simon, you should change that.” Mom began.

“I know mom. It must be important if it made the news though.” I said.

“True enough, but don’t leave it on for too long. You know I don’t really care to watch stuff like that.”

“I won't, I just want to see what it’s about.”

“More in about tonight’s terrible crash. We’ve gotten updates about what caused the crash. It turns out the semi-truck involved lost control of his brakes. He couldn’t slow down in time to avoid the cars in front of him. This led to a pile up as several cars behind the truck did not see this coming in time and hit the truck as well”

“Simon sweetie, I really think you should go ahead and switch to something else. This is horrible.”

“I know Mom, I just want to know.”

“The truck was transporting nothing but gasoline, so upon impact of the two government cars in front of him, there was an immediate explosion. Four people were airlifted to the nearest hospital however everyone in the government vehicles died on the scene. This includes not only several Royal bodyguards but the entire remaining members of the Royal Family. It’s incredibly sad to think about. It’s been two years since the death of Prince Eric, as well as not even a week since Crown Prince Wilhelm took to social media announcing his self-disowning of the Crown, but now we are left with no one from the immediate family. It’s one of the worst days Sweden has seen-”

Simon shut the TV off. The silence that followed was heavy. His mother didn’t dare speak a word. Not that it would help Simon in any way right now. 

He should’ve listened. Why doesn’t he ever listen?

The lump in his throat was too thick to swallow. Simon kept trying to. He couldn’t help himself. His mind was on several planets away right now. He’d heard and seen alot of things this week. He had gotten way too drunk to handle. He practically made out with the grossest toilet he’d ever seen. He read Wilhelm’s coming out and resignation of sorts all in one post. Now here he was with the news that not only had Wilhelm been in a car wreck, but he was dead. 

He had so much life to live. He had too many things to finish. Too much world to see. Too many laughs to laugh, smiles to smile, cries to cry. As much as Simon hated the thought, too many other people to fall in love with. He will never fall in love and get to love shamelessly and fully. He will never start a family. He will never get to be prince, no matter how much he hated that. 

Simon’s mind was running rampant, but he started to reel in. 

Wilhelm won’t see college. 

He won’t graduate high school. 

He won’t be there for regionals, barely two months away. 

Wilhelm was gone. Wilhelm is gone. 

Simon didn’t realize it, but tears were streaming down his face. His breathing had become short and staggered. So short that he could barely catch it. It felt like he was starting to hyperventilate. Suddenly he couldn’t keep enough oxygen in his lungs and his chest began to sting. 

Despite the desperate calls of his mother being the only sound to fill the room, all he could hear was ringing. A high pitched ringing that wouldn’t stop. He tried to speak, but once again all he could hear was the ringing. Nothing else. Simon kept trying. Over and over again. He tried to shout out for his mother. For Sara. For Wilhelm. He could feel the sting in his throat from the yelling. He just wanted to hear himself, his mother, anything but this god damn ringing. Wilhelm. Wilhelm. He wanted to hear Wilhelm. Speak to him one more time. Look into his eyes as he held him. He wanted to be with him. He was stupid for ever breaking things off in the first place. So fucking stupid. All he did was rob himself of the last few years of his life, of his own happiness. 

“Simon, baby can you hear me?” His mother was desperate for a response. She had never seen Simon break down like this. It was to no avail. Simon was worlds away in his own grief. She quickly rushed to his side and wrapped her arms around him. Simon buried his face in his mothers shoulder and continued to sob. 

***

The early morning sun shone through the cracks in the curtains. Simon flipped over to get away from the light that hit directly on his face. He grabbed the closest thing to him and brought it to his chest. It was soft and squishy. Simon opened his eyes to get a good look at it. It was his childhood stuffed animal. Simon had slept with this toy for years. It was one of the last things his father bought him before him and his mother split.

Simon got a good look at it. It was a small tiger. The black stripes had faded beyond belief. There was a small tear at the tail where Simon used to swing the toy around. 

The first thing that registered when Simon woke up was the smell of pancakes. He realized he was still at his mother’s house. A yawn overtook Simon’s face and he just let in. Simon sat up, swinging his feet out of the bed. His eyes fell onto the fish tank across the room. Watching the bright colored fish dart past each other. He smiled. He was reminded of memories of him and Wilheim watching them and making up stories of what they were doing in there. 

Wilheim. As fast as the good memories came, they left. Thoughts of the crash resurfaced. The images were so clear in his mind it felt like he’d been there. Simon choked up a sob. He covered his mouth. He couldn’t even control it. It happened too fast for him to realize. Wilheim died last night. His Wilheim. Wilheim. Gone. Just gone. You’ll never see him again. You’ll never hear him again. He’ll never speak to you, call you, text you. Look at you. Nothing. 

Tears clouded his vision and the sobs took over his body. The more these thoughts flooded his mind the less he could comprehend past the pain ripping through his body. Simon’s legs collapsed beneath him and he fell to the ground. He didn’t want to alarm his mother, however he was a wreck right now. Simon cried and cried. He didn’t know what else to do. All he felt was grief and sadness. The love of his life had vanished so quickly. So unpredictably. He wished he could go back and rewrite their story. He would love him more. He would care for him more. Listen more. Try to understand him and see their situationship from his point of view. 

The more he cried the more selfish he felt. In a way he felt responsible for what happened. If only he would’ve listened to him. Maybe they would’ve been together last night enjoying the safety of each other in one of their dorms. The thought did damage. Terrible damage. He was crying so hard he couldn’t catch his breath. It felt like there wasn’t enough air in this room. He had to get out. He needed air. He needed space. It felt like the walls were closing in on him. Simon gathered all the strength he had to get off the floor. His legs were still shaky but at least he was up. He flung the door open and started running to the best of his ability. His mother was in the kitchen finishing breakfast. She attempted to call out for Simon but he rushed past her and out the front door. 

He didn’t know where to go but he felt like he couldn’t stop his legs now that they started to work. He ran down the street and the next one and the next one and the next. Houses and buildings were nothing but blurs as he kept pushing himself further and further away. He ignored the ache in his legs. He didn’t care about it right now. The wind on his face kept him going. He didn’t feel so trapped anymore and that’s all he cared about. He could breathe again. He could feel something other than the heartache that had been plaguing him since last night again. 

Simon started to slow down. The burning of his calves catching up to him. Eventually he came to a halt. He was breathing heavily and sweat poured off of him. He couldn’t recall a time when he’d run so fast for so long. Simon looked around him, taking in his surroundings. He was at a park across town at least 30 or 40 minutes away from his mother’s house. He began walking again, hoping to find a bench or table or anywhere to just rest after his trek. Just ahead of him he saw a picnic table. He found his place at the table. Simon put his head down on the table, taking deep breaths to soothe the sting of his lungs and the sharp prickling in his legs.

He didn’t know how long he’d been running. He’d lost all sense of time. He felt around his pockets for his phone, but came up empty handed. Guilt hit him like a ton of bricks. His mother was probably worried sick. He was never like this. Leaving so abruptly and in general just breaking down so badly. He needed to get home. 

Simon decided to try to make it back on foot. He wasn’t extremely familiar with the area, but he had been around a few times in his life. Before he attended Hillerska he had school friends that lived here. He had a vague memory of a few back roads that would send him in the right direction. After what Simon thought was at least fifteen minutes he found himself more familiar with the part of town he was in. If memory serves him correctly he’s not too far from his childhood best friend’s house. A few twists and turns later and he was approaching the house he’d spent some of his best days in. 

Simon knocked on the front door. He wasn’t completely sure if Elias or his family still lived here, but he figured it was worth a shot. A quick moment later he heard shuffling from inside the home. He took a step back from the door. He was met with the sight of his dear friend’s mother. Shock and surprise shone on her face, but happiness quickly replaced both of them. 

“Simmie, I have not seen you in ages! Come in, come in! Are you well? How are you? What are you doing these days?” She bombarded him with many questions. He didn’t know who to expect at the door, but the sight of her relieved his brief anxieties. “I’m okay Ma. Graduation is around the corner. I’m not into too much lately. Just school and I’m on the rowing team there.”

She hugged him as soon as the door was closed. “That’s wonderful Simmie! Are you studying hard? Oh my goddess how are your Mom and Sara? What are they up to? Gosh, It’s been too long really.” Simon laughed at her excitement. She was always a ray of sunshine. It was hard to feel down around her. “They’re fine. Good actually. Mom works at the hospital in town. Sara is good. She’s found good friends and enjoys school. She spends all her free time horse riding. Her favorite place to be is in the stables with her horses.”

Elias’ mother looked up at him, grinning from ear to ear. “That is so good to hear. It makes me happy. What brings you to this side of town Simmie? Your house is half an hour away right?” She questioned. 

SImon’s gaze dropped to the floor. He nervously rubbed the back of his neck. He should’ve anticipated this question. He tried to come up with something convincing. “I was going for a run. I’ve been working on endurance and just stopped paying attention I guess.” He chuckled awkwardly. She seemed to buy his story, so he kept going. “I left my phone at home, but didn’t go back for it ‘cause I didn’t think I’d be gone too long. I was hoping I could use your phone to call my mom to come get me.”

“Of course sweetheart. Let me grab it for you.” Without hesitation the older woman was searching the room for her cellphone. “Ah and here it is.”

Simon grabbed the phone graciously. He quickly dialed his mother’s number. The phone barely reached the first ring before she answered. “Yes, hello?”

“Hey mom. It’s Simon.”

“Oh Simon! I almost had a heart attack when you raced out. You scared me so bad. I tried to run after you but you were just so quick. Are you alright? Where are you now?” She exclaimed. Her words came out quickly and they rushed together. “I called Ayub after you left and he’s out looking for you now.”

“I’m okay mom. Just ran to clear my head. I left my phone in my room or I would’ve called you sooner. Sorry to worry you. Can you come get me? I’m at Elias’ family home. I’m calling you from his mother’s phone.”

Simon could hear her sigh of relief over the phone. “Thank the heavens you are okay. I was so so worried something was going to happen to you love. I will be there shortly. I’m going to call your friend and let him know you're safe.”

“Okay Mom. I love you. I will see you soon.” Simon hung up the phone and handed it back to Elias’ mother. She sat at the dining table across the room and motioned for him to join her. She struck up a conversation with him. She began informing him of everything he’s missed over the years. She filled him in on Elias and his current whereabouts. Simon learned his old friend ended up studying abroad in another country. He was content in this moment. The two just went back and forth detailing their lives out until Simon’s mother got there. 

The journey home was much faster than the run over and for that Simon was grateful. His mother did not question him on his previous behavior, another thing Simon was grateful for. Once they arrived home he rushed inside. He wanted to take a shower and get changed. 

Simon turned the knob noticing it was unlocked. “Mom, I think you forgot to lock the door.” 

“I thought I had, but I was also in a hurry to get to you.” She said. 

“I’m sorry Mom, I really didn’t mean to worry you. I’m not even sure what came ov-,” Simon stopped mid sentence as he turned into the house. 

He blinked and he blinked and he blinked, but it didn’t change the fact that Wilhelm was standing in his kitchen. His arms were wrapped tightly around himself. Any words Simon knew left his brain. He couldn’t fathom the scene playing in front of him. Surely this was not his Willhelm. Surely he was confused. This couldn’t be the same Willhelm that he’d loved and laughed with. The one he’d cried with, cried over, cried because of. This couldn’t be the one he’d just started mourning last night. The very same Willhelm that he’d barely braced himself to never see again. 

“Simon,” He started to speak but he didn’t say anymore. His voice was hoarse as if he’d been crying or screaming for hours. Willhelm ran to him. He threw his arms around him urgently. Simon let himself fall right into Willhelm’s arms. Simon was still in complete shock. He couldn't understand what was happening to him. This isn’t real. This isn’t real. This isn’t real. On repeat in his mind. It was the only thought in his head. He didn’t know how or why this was happening, but all he knew was he must be hallucinating his soulmate holding onto him for dear life. 

“Simon my mom,” Simon felt a wetness on his shoulder. “My dad,” As Willhelm tried to speak, his body shook on and off. “They’re dead Si.” He choked out. Simon still couldn’t find his words. He could feel the rapid drumming of his heart against his chest. His limbs grew weaker the longer the two stood together, wrapped around each other. 

“I was supposed to be with them. I blew up on Mom and screamed at her and stormed off. I was supposed to be in that car with them Si.” Willhelm barely made out the words between his sobs. He had never seen the bubbly boy so inconsolable in their relationship. His problems had always been bigger than Simon could imagine. Royal duties and an image to upkeep, but this was different. This was a much deeper than anything the two had taken on together. First his brother, his first best friend, the only one that understood him and cared about what he had to say. Now both of his parents in a single instant were gone. 

A trail of tears fell from Simon’s eyes despite his knowledge. He could feel the earth crumbling under Willhelm much like he’d experienced last night and just a few hours ago himself. He had no idea what losing your parents felt like, but he had experienced an unbearable sense of grief. 

“I’m so sorry WIlle. I'm so sorry.” It was all he could muster out, but it didn’t matter. Simon knew that. Willhelm continued sobbing and shaking. He didn’t have the energy for anything else. In the emotional chaos the two slowly ended up on the couch. Simon’s mother watched wordlessly. She had never been a part of a situation like this. She knew the boys were in two very different states of shock and anguish, but without any true way to help she just sat at the kitchen table waiting in case either of them needed anything. 

***

Simon woke up in a mountain of pillows and blankets. He was hot and sweaty and overall overwhelmed. His body was flushed with sweat and his clothes clung to his sweatier skin. He attempted to roll over and found himself stuck in place. When he looked over his shoulder he saw Willhelm curled up to his back. His face was buried into the top of his back. One arm underneath Simon’s neck and another wrapped around his waist. They’re legs were intertwined between the blanket mound. All of yesterday’s memories flooded back instantly. His breakdown, his run across town, coming home to see Willhelm, the two crying with each other until they passed out. 

Simon eased out of Willhelm’s grasp. He pulled away some of the blankets and began folding them. He turned behind him. In the kitchen his mother was still sat the kitchen table. She had fallen asleep there. She’d covered herself with a thick blanket. She had also taken one of the small couch cushions as a pillow. A pang of guilt struck him. She had to be so lost and clueless to the mess he was in.

Simon crossed through the small space to get to her. He placed a hand on her shoulder and shook gently. “Mama,” He continued shaking until he felt her stir. “Mama, go lay down. We’re fine. Get some decent rest.” His mother stretched his arms high above her. 

“Are you sure my love?” She asked in a sleepy whisper. “Yes. Thank you for being by our sides, but you need to rest.” She stood up and collect her pillow. Before she left for her room she grabbed Simon’s face and kissed his forehead. She held his face in her hands, cupping them at his cheeks. “I love you so much Simon. I will do anything for you. Never forget it.” Simon nodded. Without another word, she went to her room. 

Simon turned back towards Willhelm. He still slept peacefully behind him. He joined the boy back on the couch, only sitting on the edge. He caressed his face carefully. He let his fingertips drift along the surface of the paler boy’s face. He’d missed him. He’d missed him so so much. More than he’d ever even realized he did. He’d missed his smile. The way his hair fell so softly against his face. He’d missed the way his hands felt within his own and how his skin always felt so soft underneath his fingertips. The smell of him. The smell he couldn’t find anywhere else no matter how hard he searched. He had missed this boy so much. 

The weight on his heart was lifted. Simon was beyond lucky that the tragedy that had struck hadn’t taken his love away. He couldn’t stop thinking about how less than a day ago he didn’t know if he would ever be okay again. He had no idea how he was going to live on without Willhelm. In this moment at least he didn’t have to think that way. Willhelm was here with him. He was right in front of him. On his couch. In his home. 

Simon felt Willhelm’s body. He was just as sweaty as Simon was earlier. He didn’t want to disturb the boy, but he didn’t want him to be so uncomfortable either. “Wille,” He ran a hand through his hair, and kissed his forehead. “Wake up Wille.” He didn’t budge. Simon kept trying to wake him. “Wake up Willie. Wake up love bug.” Simon started tugging at his arms. After a little while Willhelm began to rise. His swollen eyes fluttered open. He blinked multiple times as his eyes adjusted to the morning sun. 

“What time is it?” Willhelm managed out in between a long yawn. Simon looked around for his phone. It was on the side table on the other side of the couch. He didn’t remember putting it there. His mother must have done it. He retrieved it off the charger and unlocked it. He had many missed calls and messages from his friends. Everyone had sent some variation of “are you okay, we’re worried about you.” He decided he would reply to those later. 

“Eight am.” Simon finally answered. Willhelm brought his knees up on the couch and wrapped his arms around his legs, nestling them to his chest. Simon could see reality cascading back to him. 

The two sat in silence for a moment. Neither of them knew what to say or even what came next. Willhelm had no idea what his future would hold now or what he would do with it. Simon wanted to ask, but he knew that asking would probably send Willhelm into a bad spiral right now. 

“I’m sorry Si.” Willhelm mustered. 

“What are you sorry for?” Simon inquired.

“Bombarding you last night, but I needed you.”

“I’m not mad at you for anything, and you don’t need to feel sorry. I’ve needed you too.”

“I didn’t know if you were gonna be home and when no one was here after I let myself in I was gonna leave. I’d been here for about 15 minutes and decided to go before someone called the cops on me and then you came in.”

“This doesn’t feel real honestly. I never thought I’d see you again.” Simon’s voice dropped to a whisper. He’d finally vocalized the thoughts that had taken over his brain. 

“My whole plan was to get to you.” Willhelm’s eyes dropped to the floor. Him and Simon couldn’t get their eyes off each other as the conversation began, but now Willhelm was losing confidence. 

“I only wanted you Si. I didn’t care about being King anymore if that meant I couldn’t have you.”

Simon felt tears building in his eyes. He was tired of crying. He couldn’t help them though. Willhelm had just confirmed one of his nagging suspicions. Deep in his heart he knew that Willhelm had given up the crown for him. He felt so selfish for thinking it the first time it came to mind, but he just knew that Willhelm would do something like this. He had hoped for his sake he was wrong. He hoped he wouldn’t give up the only life he knew just for him. 

“But why Wille? You know I would never have asked that of you.”

“You didn’t have to.  I told you I’d do whatever it took to be with you and I meant it. You are the single most important person to me. It ate away at me everyday that you felt so shameful of our relationship and that I wasn’t doing all I could to prove my love for you, so I made the biggest move I could possibly make to show you I was serious.” Willhelm reached for Simon’s hands. He took both of them in his own and held onto them tightly. As if he was falling and he was desperate for him to hold on to him. “You deserved more. You deserve more, and I hope you can let me begin to make it up to you. If you don’t I can understand that. I can understand if you’ve moved on or just want to be without me. I would totally understand if you felt that way. Tell me no and I will leave you alone.”

Simon thought back to the day he broke everything off with Willhelm. 

“If you loved me I wouldn’t feel like this Wille. If you loved me like you say you do then I wouldn’t have to lie about our relationship to the whole world.”

He was so broken. He felt like his life was crumbling away with every word he spoke. Everything he had known, the life and the boy he’d grown so comfortable with was falling apart at his own hands. 

“I want someone to love me unconditionally and wholeheartedly and not worry about the consequences. They love me and they would stop at nothing or no one to love me. And I know that you can’t do that.” 

Simon remembered the pure anguish in Willhelm’s eyes. The brokenness of his spirit. He felt like he was looking into a mirror because everything he saw in Willhelm, he felt in himself a hundred times over. That was the last time they spoke before yesterday and here they were all these months later. The feelings he’d felt for him hadn’t left. Simon had spent everyday wishing and begging to himself for Willhelm to come back to him. He felt stupid every time he did it, but he did it anyway. All he wanted was a do over. A fresh slate to love each other how they both wanted and needed.

“Wille, all I’ve ever wanted is you. I want to spend every minute of every day with you.”

“So is that a yes, you’ll let me make it up to you?” A pink blush took over Willhelm’s face as he popped the question. 

Simon had let a couple of tears fall as he was thinking, but Willhelm’s obliviousness made him laugh. 

“Of course that’s a yes.” Willhelm smiled. A true, goofy smile spanning from ear to ear. “Thank god.” He mumbled, lounging straight into Simon’s arms. He’d thrown his arms around Simon’s neck, enveloping him into a hug. Simon instinctively did the same. 

“I love you Wille.” Simon said into the crook of his neck.

“I have always loved you and I always will. I would crawl to the end of the earth for you.”

Description: Taeyong’s tired of people and feelings

Genre: Angst w/ a happy ending :)

Pairing: Lee Taeyong x reader ft. Johnny

Word Count: 1k

“I’m tired of just pretending I’m over her.“ Taeyong sighed, looking over to his black haired companion.  Johnny was splayed out on his living room couch, legs crossed and phone lying face down on his chest in order to pay full attention to the pink haired male across from him.

“I never get to feel anything real. Everyone expects me to always be happy and as the leader, I have to be strong, especially for the younger guys.  It’s just so overwhelming ya’know?” Johnny nodded, waiting for Taeyong to continue before he said anything. “Me and Y/n broke up almost four months ago and she’s still the only thing I can ever think about. I miss her so much.  I was such an idiot. For months I ignored her for things that didn’t even matter.  We would go weeks without speaking because I thought it was a burden to constantly be texting or calling her, but fuck, I would do anything to be able to hear her voice again.” The strain in Taeyong’s voice grew more and more apparent as he continued to speak. Johnny could tell he would be crying in no time.

“Why didn’t you fight for her?” Johnny asked. “That’s where I messed up. I didn’t fight for her because I never thought I would have to. I completely took her for granted and I regret it everyday.” Taeyong dropped his face into his hands. Soon after sobs took over his body. Johnny scooted closer to him, embracing him after quickly shifting his phone from his chest to the coffee table. Taeyong buried his face into the taller male’s shoulder. “I’ve made the worst mistake and there’s no way I can fix it.” He groaned. It was hard for Johnny to understand what he’d said, so he definitely didn’t know how you understood once you’d replied with, “I think you can.”

Taeyong shot up from Johnny’s grasp looking dazed and confused. “Y/n?” He sniffled softly, tears still setting trails down his cheeks. “Taeyong, it’s me.” Your voice cracked as you spoke, alerting the two others that you yourself had begun to cry. Taeyong snatched the phone off the table and brought it as close to as physically possible. “I can’t believe it.” He said wistfully. “Y/n. Wow.” He was close to speechless. “Did you hear everything?” “I did.” You answered truthfully. “I meant every single word. You were no doubt the best thing to ever happen to me Y/n. I was the happiest I’d ever been when we were together, you little up my life and I should’ve been more grateful when we were still together. It shouldn’t have have taken me losing you to realize that, but it did and I’m sorry.. So so sorry.”

“Tae.” You started, voice gentle. You knew he was hanging onto your every word. “do you know why I broke up with you?” Taeyong didn’t even have to stop and think before he answered. “I acted like I didn’t care about you.” He said guiltily. “It felt like I wasn’t important to you anymore, like you didn’t love me. We’d been friends way before your debut and as soon as we started dating it felt like I was a problem instead of your girlfriend, instead of your best friend. All I really wanted was to know that you wanted me in your life.” “I know,  I never showed it, but you were the biggest part of my life. Nothing I did was possible without you right there by my side.” Neither of you spoke for a moment.”Can I come over tomorrow morning and we finish talking everything out?” You asked. “Of course, key’s under the mat.” He said, practically without missing a beat. “I know.” he could hear the grin in your voice, causing him to form one of his own.

“Tae?”

“Yes?”

“I love you.”

“I love you too Y/n.”

Taeyong held tight to the phone long after you ended the call. He didn’t dare move a muscle. He couldn’t believe what just happened. He just heard your voice, something he didn’t think was ever going to happen again not even in his dreams. Not only that, but he was on his way to making things right with you. If all went well tomorrow, he would have his best friend and girlfriend back. And this time he wouldn’t screw everything up. He would be sure to show you just how much you meant to him no matter what he was doing or who he was with. He would scream his love for you every few minutes if he had to. Next thing Taeyong knew Johnny was poking at him, attempting to slide his phone out of his grasp. “Can I get my phone back?” “Oh yeah! Sorry about that. Forgot it was yours.” Johnny smiled. “It’s all good man.”

Time passed and the sun began to fall out of view. Taeyong collected everything he’d brought with him. “You leaving already?” Johnny asked, heading to the kitchen to grab himself a soda. “Yeah, I wanna be up bright and early.” He said, shooting Johnny his signature smile. “Oh and by the way, thank you. Even if things don’t go well tomorrow, I at least needed time to talk to her and get all this off my chest.” Johnny shook his head. “Hey, don’t say that. Things will be better between you and Y/n in no time. And besides, I hated seeing you so miserable. You do so much for NCT, including putting our well-beings above your own, this was small in comparison to the things you sacrifice for us on a daily basis.” Taeyong leaned in for a hug, Johny happily complied and ruffled This hair as he pulled away.

“BE GOOD TOMORROW!!!!” Johnny yelled after Taeyong who was already half way down the street. The others laugh echoed in the empty neighborhood and spread a smile across Johnny’s face. He waited for the mop of pink hair to disappear before he retreated back inside. Once it had, he shut his door and flopped on his couch.

Description: winwin is too precious and pure for this world.

Genre: fluffy fluff

Pairing: Dong Sicheng x reader

Word Count: 1.3k

    “Two ice cream cones please.” Sicheng smiled at the old lady. His smile made you feel warm inside despite standing in front of an ice cream truck. “Coming right up!” She said,  returning a bright smile of her own. Sicheng wrapped his arm around you and you rested your head-on his shoulder while you waited. “I still can’t believe it.” He said, ending the once peaceful quiet. “Believe what babe? ” You asked. “That someone as beautiful as you could have ever fallen for me.” You felt your cheeks heat up at the comment. Sicheng had a habit of being incredibly sweet at any given moment even though you guys had almost been dating a year. “I think the same thing everyday.“ You said, smiling a cheeky smile and planting a quick kiss on his cheek.  

“No way! ” he said,  dismissing your statement with a small, bubbly laugh.  “Yes way.” you grabbed the cones from the short woman when she returned with them. Sicheng pulled out a couple dollars from his pocket and paid the small fee. He wrapped his arm around you once again and you picked up the conversation right where you had left off. “You’re easily the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen.” Sicheng chuckled. “I beg to differ.”He said,  leading the way into town. You handed him his cone and took a lick off your own. “You can’t disagree with me on this one. I’m fortunate enough to have the luxury of staring at your gorgeous face all day on. It’s quite a sight.” Sicheng was somehow already half way down. His face was buried within the ice cream as if it was the best thing he’d ever ever had. When he finally came up for air, there was a strip of ice cream on his nose. You giggled as he continued I’ve it wasn’t even there. “Well,  I’m blessed enough to the sight of you in the early mornings before even the birds are awake. You always look so soft and gentle, oh and peaceful,  while you sleep. Now that is a sight to see.”He said. You let out a fake gasp and dramatically held a hand to your heart,  “Dong Sicheng, you watch me while I sleep?” “For like ten minutes in the morning, not throughout the night.”

You side stepped away from him, creating a space between your bodies that hadn’t been there before. “Creepy.” You said in a playful singsong voice. “Shut up, you’re the creepy one.” He accused. You’d just now finished the top part of your cone. “How am I the creepy one?” “You sneak into my house and into my bed in the middle of the night. Every night.” You sighed. “You got me there, but in my defense I get lonely in my bed alone. Not to mention I don’t want to sleep without you.” a blush spread across your cheeks as you spoke. Sicheng only smiled and closed the gap once again. “Y/n?” When you looked at him the collection of ice cream had spread from his nose to around his mouth. “Hmm?” You hummed curiously. “I love you.” “I love you too.  Also you got a little something right here… and here.”You proceeded to lick the ice cream off his face. “AH!“ Sicheng swatted at his face with his sleeves. “You’re special gross!” He whimpered, not dropping his hands back to his sides until he was sure there wasn’t a trace of your saliva left. You walked on, passing a few stores and eating your ice cream as if nothing had even happened although behind you all you could hear was Sicheng’s whines. “Licking my face is sooooo weird, but you still do it.”

“We make out all the time and you seem to enjoy that, it’s basically the same thing.” You shrugged casually.  This wasn’t the first time you guys have had this conversation. “Totally not the same thing. That involves lips and tongues, this involves your tongue and my face. So not the same thing.” “I mean you like it when my tongue is involved with yo-,” Sicheng interrupted you before you could finish. “Hey, we are in public where there are children,” He cut himself off with a gasp. You carried on the way to the movie theater while finishing off the last bit of your cone. That was until Sicheng ran over to you and pulled you back to whatever had grabbed his attention. “BABE! PET STORE! CAN WE PRETTY PLEASE LOOK AROUND??” He screamed excitedly. He was already bouncing up and down even though you hadn’t given him an answer yet. “But we’ll be late for the movie.” You reminded him of your original plans for the rest of the evening. “I know, but pleaseeee?” He begged, tugging at your arms trying to bring you closer to the pet store. “Fine, five minutes. That’s all we’re staying.”

Sicheng squealed happily and made a mad dash inside before you could even blink. He’s so cute. You reached for the door handle and entered, acknowledging the fact that you’d already lost your boyfriend without two minutes even passing.You walked past cages upon cages of animals. Some were short and fluffy. Others were long and scaly. There were all types of animals in the shop that you saw on a daily basis, and a few others you didn’t. Eventually you found Sicheng in the very back, sitting in a puppy pen. “Y/n! Look at them! They’re all so adorable! This white one is Cherry blossom, he was found under a cherry blossom tree, the spotted one is Daisy, the black and white one is Panda, and the brown one is Mudball. Whenever they find a new puppy they hold a competition between the local children which decides who gets to name it. Isn’t that cool?!” He beamed, relaying to you all the information of the signs hung up around the pen while trying to cuddle and pet all the puppies at once. You checked the time on your phone. “Yes, they’re all adorable now come on so we don’t miss the movie.” “Babygirl.” He whinned. “Look the store close soon anyway, so come on.” You attempted to to drag him up off the floor. “Y/n.” He hurriedly stood up, brushing himself off with all playfulness gone from his face. “Let’s get a puppy.” He deadpanned.

You shook your head, taken back by his bluntness. “Taking care of a puppy requires a lot work. It’s like baby with fur. I think we should wait a while. Now come on.” You motioned for him to follow you, but obviously he wasn’t going to listen. Sicheng reached down and picked up the black and white puppy, it was smallest of the four. “Look Panda in her eyes and tell her she’s not getting a safe and loving home tonight and she’ll probably be stuck here for a few more months.” Sicheng said, guilt tripping you. “Fine! Get the dog some toys, food, and a bed, I’ll go talk to someone who works here.” You huffed, giving into his wishes. “Yay!” He ran off to find everything you’d told him, dog in hand and all.

A few hours later, you, Sicheng, and Panda were settling in for the night. Once you’d gotten home, you and Sicheng had spent about an hour puppy-proofing his apartment, putting everything away that you guys didn’t want Panda to chew and destroy. This also meant you were moving things out of Panda’s reach while Sicheng played with her. However right now she was curled up between you two. “See isn’t having a puppy better than going to some movie?” Sicheng whispered. You nodded. “Yeah but when Panda poops in the floor you’re the one that has to clean it up.” “Alright fine.” He sighed, voice reigning fake sadness.

“Goodnight Y/n.”

“Goodnight baby.”

Part 1

Description: Atelophobia- the fear of not being good enough or imperfect

Pairing: Sehun x Reader

Genre: Angst

Word Count: 2,703

Sehun closed his eyes, refusing to look at anything except the darkness behind his eyelids. He just wanted to be home in your arms, feeling a sense of comfort wrap around him as he smelled the scent of your favorite perfume. He shook his head. Then again, he didn’t want to be with you right now. As much as he loved you and being with you, Sehun just couldn’t bring himself to believe that he was right for you. In all honesty, he was a good person. But at the same time he didn’t think he was good enough for you. You had assured him many times that there’s no way you would be happier with anyone else, but despite the constant reassurance, he couldn’t find it in himself to believe your words wholeheartedly.

Sehun slowly opened his eyes. He was still sitting on the bus which was once teeming with people, but now most everyone had gotten off. He ran a shaky hand through his currently blonde hair. There were a lot of things in this world that worried Sehun to death, and dying his hair was one of the few things that he found that didn’t. It was quite weird, the surge of happiness and tranquility that flooded his body when he bought another hair kit to give his hair a new ‘personality’ as he liked to call it. Last week he had went with a subtle burgundy color, this week he bleached it and left it at that.

Sehun felt the bus jolt to the side as they went around a corner. He should honestly be used to riding this bus, he had been doing this since he first started school. He never rode the bus to school. It was close enough to where he could walk, but he did start needing to go places more frequently and his mother’s car was more often than not, out of commission. After a few more stops, Sehun grabbed his phone from the spot beside him and got off the bus. He was on his way to see you, even though he wasn’t sure if it would be a good idea or not. He’s had a lot of things swirling around his head lately, mostly about your relationship. There were so many things he was unsure of, but one thing he knew was that he was very much in love with you.

He was sure that’s why he had started questioning everything, your relationship and all of it’s aspects that is.

Sehun was in love with you. No matter how many times he denied the fact, he couldn’t avoid the truth. You two had been dating since your third year of high school, and you were both going into your last year of college. That was something that had surprised everyone, including Sehun himself. Sehun wasn’t the type of guy to pursue serious relationships and definitely not for six years.  He hadn’t expected anything serious to come out of your summer fling. At first you really couldn’t call it a fling. It was more like you two had a one night stand and then kept calling each other back because you couldn’t stay away from each other. This shared lust soon turned into strong attraction and then before you knew it, the two of you were dating with serious feelings involved.

The walk from the bus stop to your house was just a short distance, but it still gave Sehun a reasonable amount of time to clear his head. If he didn’t stop thinking about his relationship with you on the way to your house, he wouldn’t be able to pay any attention to you. He would constantly push you away and ignore and he hated to be like that towards you. You deserve my full attention! He would always say.

Sehun fished your house key from his front jean pocket. He smiled when he remembered the day you gave it to him. You had decorated the key with a few tiny hearts at the top. “Just so you’ll always have my love with you, no matter where you go.” You had said with a cheeky grin, which in turn earned you a kiss on the forehead and a bright, Cheshire grin in return. Focus on Y/n, focus on Y/n, focus on Y/n. Sehun relentlessly repeated in his mind as he unlocked the door and continued inside.

Sehun barely had the door closed when you jumped in his arm after releasing a loud squeal. “Baby, I’ve missed you much.” He just laughed, wrapping his arms around your smaller figure. “It hasn’t even that long since I last came over and we have several classes together.” Y/n scoffed. “It’s been over a month and in the one class we have together, I’m sat up front and you’re in the very back. Not to mention as soon as class ends, you jet out the door so anytime I try to talk to you, you’re already gone.”

You hopped out of Sehun’s grasp. “Sorry babe. You know how much I hate our professor. I don’t want to spend anymore time than I have to in that bi-” “Watch your mouth, my little sister is in the living room and you know how well she hears.” Y/n said cutting off one of Sehun’s favorite profanities.

“Fine.” Sehun puffed, quickly sneaking a kiss to your cheek. “What do you have planned?” He asked, leaning in the doorway between the kitchen. “Ah well. I figured we could cuddle on the couch for a while. My mom had to go work, hints the reason why my sister’s here. She’ll be here in like two hours so after that we can either stay here or go out and find something to do.” Sehun nodded. “Sounds good baby.”

  “Miss Y/l/n.” You snapped your head up, immediately looking at the your algebra professor. “Yes sir?” He pointed to the equation he had written on the board. “I asked you for the answers to number three and four.” You looked down at the scribbled mess on your paper. “Um, three is no solution and four is x equals three over two.” Your professor nodded and continued on with his lesson. You released a breath you didn’t realize you were holding until now that your lungs had a slight ache. Class ended after another thirty minutes of solving equations and note taking. Everyone one rushed out the classroom, including Sehun. You took your time putting your textbook and notebooks, seeing as how Sehun was probably half way across the campus by now.

    You picked up your bag, but before you could leave the room your professor called your name. “Hey, you’ve seemed pretty distracted recently, everything okay?” You nodded quickly. “Yeah, school’s just been getting stressful considering how close to the end of the year we are.” Your professor looked at you warily. “Anything else?”

You shook your head again. “No, I’m fine.” Yes, I’m worried about my boyfriend. Your professor gave you one last look, and dismissed you with a wave of his hand. You set off once again. You had wanted to ask Sehun if he could come over later, but you knew he was far gone now. You knew he would’ve given you an honest answer, whereas here lately if you texted him he would make up any excuse about how he was busy or didn’t feel too good. You tried to be as understanding as possible, but this had been going on the last two, almost three, months. It was really starting to scare you. You hated to lose faith in your boyfriend’s loyalty to you, but every time he declined a hang out or ignored one of your calls, your mind couldn’t help but think of different scenarios. Whether it was him cheating or simply him at home sleeping all day, you had thought of it all.

After the few minute minute walk to your car, you were pleasantly surprised to see your boyfriend leaning up against your car. He didn’t see you approaching because all his attention was focused towards his phone. “Hey Sehunnie.” You said, breaking him from his trance. He didn’t even say anything, he just pulled you into a tight hug. “I love you babe.”

“I love you too. What’s this about, I figured you’d already halfway home by now?” You said, sliding out of his arms. “I’m so sorry. I’ve been a dick lately. I was gonna go home, but I realized that I haven’t really been there for you lately. I wanted to see if you wanted to spend this weekend together?” He replied, lacing your fingers together. “Of course, but I have plans with Baekhyun to study a little while after school, so depending on what time you come over, he might be there.“ A scowl fought its way upon Sehun’s face. “You know I don’t trust him.”

“Yeah neither do I, but we were paired up together on an assignment at the beginning of the year and the teacher keeps pairing us up. You have nothing to worry about. I don’t like Baekhyun, and I never will. You have my heart baby.” You said, placing kisses all around his face. When you finally pulled away, there was an adorable smile adorning his face. “I’m so lucky to have you.” Sehun commented, as you both got into your car. “I know.” you nonchalantly replied while backing out of the parking lot. You heard Sehun scoff from the passenger side, and you couldn’t help but giggle. “Babeee. That was the part where you were supposed to ‘oh no sweetie, I’m more lucky to have you’ not agree with me.” He whined. You grabbed his hand, threading your fingers together. “Sorry Sehunnie, but it’s true, and I couldn’t help but to agree.” Sehun let out a small chuckle, but not before softly kissing your cheek and resting his head on your shoulder.

“Can we take a break? Sehun just texted me.“ I asked the dark-haired boy sitting across from me. We’d been studying for a little under two hours. I wasn’t terrible at math, but after too long continuously solving problems made me feel brain dead. “Can’t he wait?“ Baekhyun puffed impatiently. “I know he’s your boyfriend and all but you’ve literally been texting him the whole time I’ve been here.“

You sighed. “Fine, okay. Let’s continue.” With that you hurriedly replied to Sehun’s text and slid your phone in your back pocket. You looked over at Baekhyun. Is he smiling? You shook your head. No it wasn’t. You’re just being stupid, keep working. You thought.

Several minutes later, you and Baekhyun found yourselves to be halfway through the assigned workbook page. It was honestly one of the stupidest assignments you’ve ever had to work on. It was homework, but it was required that you work with a partner. The worst part, in your opinion, was that the teacher got to pick who you worked with. You thought it was bothersome honestly. Math wasn’t necessarily your strong suit, but you knew you would have been able to finish the work a hell of alot faster. Unfortunately, that was not the case. You finished the last problem on the page, and looked over to a bored looking Baekhyun. “You ready to compare answers?” He asked you, spinning his pencil around his fingers. You nodded, reaching for his notebook. He let the notebook slid into your hands, as he took the black and white polka dotted one from your hands.

You carefully reviewed his answer, analyzing every letter, symbol, and number he had written down. He had somehow gotten negative thirty-four, instead of positive fourteen which was what you got. “Hey, I think you did something wrong. We have two totally different answers.” Baekhyun laid the two notebooks side by side. “Are you sure my answer is the wrong one sweetheart?” He said, sending his signature smirk your way. To most girls, it would have made them fall head over heels, or more accurately, it would have made their panties fall. He was a well known player who had a campus reputation to have slept with almost every girl, twice. You didn’t reply to him though. His flirty aura often made you feel uncomfortable, so you did your best to ignore it. That’s how most of your conversations with Baekhyun went. He would say something either borderline or extremely flirty, and you would pretend not to have heard it.

“Look here. See you didn’t subtract 16 from both sides, you added it. And you forgot the negative sign in the first step.” Baekhyun took back his notebook back, immediately erasing the work he had previously done. The next hour and a half carried on that same way. You guys solving the problem, and coming back together to check over your work. The only times you two spoke was after you finished a problem, or if one of you needed help, but it was mostly Baekhyun needing the help. He never paid attention in class. It was a wonder he had even made it into college. You had also went to highschool with him. That’s how you met Sehun, through Baekhyun. They were in the same friend group, although you couldn’t see how once you really got to know Sehun. He was usually quiet, and for the most part kept to himself, rarely taking part in whatever conversation was taking place. The exact opposite of Byun Baekhyun, who , very clamorously, was always the center of attention.

You had just finished the last problem. Baekhyun seemed to still be working, so you slid your phone from your pocket. You had two missed calls and several text messages from Sehun.

From Sehunnie: Babeeeeeeee

From Sehunnie: Answer meeeeeeeee

From Sehunnie: I forgot you were studying :((( but I’ll be over soon

From Sehunnie: I love youuuuuuuuuuu

You couldn’t keep from grinning like an idiot. Even after dating for six years, you still thought he was the most adorable human being ever. Baekhyun wordlessly handed you his notebook. You unlike all the other questions, you quickly scanned over it, and tossed it back his way. “Well it was nice studying with you. We finished homework and Sehun will be here soon.” You stood up to stretch your legs, neither you or Baekhyun had gotten up since you sat down to do homework. Baekhyun shoved all his stuff into his black bookbag and slung it over his shoulder.

You led the way to your front door, Baekhyun right behind you. You sorta felt bad for kicking him out so rudely, but you were just so excited to finally spend some well deserved quality time with Sehun, you could barely walk straight. You opened the door, giving Baekhyun the space to walk through. “See you Monday.” You mumbled, ready to slam the door in his face. That was way more time spent with him for your liking, despite the fact that you didn’t want to spend anytime with him at all. Baekhyun leaned against the doorframe. “Alright babe, see you Monday.” Right before he turned around to leave, Baekhyun winked at you, causing you to cringe harder than you did when he called you names such as ‘babe’ or sweetheart’.

You went to shut the door, but right before you could, you heard Baekhyun shout your name. “What Baek-,” You didn’t get the chance to finish what you were saying as Baekhyun slammed his lips against yours, bringing his hands up to your sides to pull you close. You weren’t kissing him back, you just weren’t pulling away because everything hadn’t registered yet. Baekhyun was… kissing you? You were extremely shocked to say the least, and had no idea what to do. However, to someone looking at the scene from the outside would think it was a passionate kiss. The way you and Baekhyun were so close, your arms resting lightly on his chest, and his arms wrapped tightly around you. Anyone witnessing such a scene could’ve felt their heart melting away at how cute of a couple you two were, except the only one to see it was Sehun.

changed it up a bit. I took off some older stuff and changed things around

Updated: 02/16/21

A- Angst

F- Fluff

If there’s neither, I’m not sure just read and find out ;)

EXO

Members

Sehun

Atelophobia- A |01| 02|

Typical Day-A |01 |02|

Exposed- F

Night Stop- F

Baekhyun

Fooled- A |01| |02|

Fortress- A

Junmyeon

Falling 

Catch Me

Ambivalent

Kyungsoo

Next Door- A

Camisado- A

Chanyeol

Midnight Confessions- A

Everything I Wanted- A

Out of Touch

Minseok

Rain- A

Jongin

Too Far Gone- A

Jongdae