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Missing you extra hard today. 🥲
📸: Ryan Chang
I've been feeling very out of sorts recently, but pulling-myself-together attempts are happening in the background. Thanks to those of you who've been keeping me sane recently, I appreciate you ♡
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I love getting comments from people enjoying my fics who are looking forward to more, I really do! But maybe it’s something with the way my mind processes it and it’s just me, or maybe this is something others relate to as well, but comments that are just something along the lines of “please update soon” with no variation of “wow I really enjoyed this!” included feel… idk if disheartening is the right word, but something like that.
Because me, personally, I’m usually always actively trying to work my way through writing the next chapter of all my current ongoing fics. But I cannot control the work my professors assign, or the time my chronic pain chooses to flare up nor the severity of it, and nor can I control any other aspect of my life that pops up and slows down or sometimes even fully pauses my usual writing process.
And to see someone who presumably enjoys my fic(s) enough to ask for an update, only ask for an update feels… kinda bad. I don’t know exactly what it is about it, but it’s just like… because they aren’t mentioning anything they liked about the fic, or even that they liked it, in their comment it sorta feels like they don’t truly appreciate the work I’ve put in and only want the end result of the next update?
Not sure if I’m properly articulating the way I feel about it, but yeah. I do appreciate that they even took the time to comment and seem to enjoy the fic because they’re asking for more of it! But at the same time it’s— I enjoy it because it’s a nice comment and not a scam or a bot or hate, but it’s not my favorite kind of nice comment to receive, if that makes sense? Idk I’m tired and in pain rn
TLDR: I think (knock on all of the wood) that work is slowing down just enough for me to resume my writing schedule and be around more. But, I'm having one of my usual do I matter as an author crises and struggling with some writer's block. Right now I think I need to really prioritize what I want to write and what I can get my brain to write lol as I get back into the swing of things. With how tired I am I think it's going to be some pure/close to pure fluffy/flirty/funny pieces that are quicker for me to write and less mentally taxing than my usual angst hurt/comfort that I love. I'm thinking things like It's planned., Tepid, A nice bonus (I'm realizing how few of those kind of pieces I have with Jack 😂 love to make him and reader work for it 😂).
That said, I don't have a ton of fluffy/flirty/funny ideas at the moment 😂😭😂, so if you have any cute little ideas for Jack, Pope, Titus, Brett, Grant, or Charlie that fit that vibe feel free to send them my way!! 🙂 Thank you for your patience with me and your support!! I really appreciate it more than I can say. I’m sorry for whining and saying shit I say all the time and you’re so kind to support me through. I’m really not looking for attention or praise, I just want to be open about where I’m at. ♥️♥️
Gif because he's hot of the day and the gif that made me have to write for him for the energy:
Extended version below. Idk why other than at this point I wrote it so why not lol.
Being an art major in one class with almost exclusively science majors is so funny. I’ll talk to my art friends about my free-topic class project and they’ll be like “obviously that’s true you barely have to do research to prove it” and then I walk into class and the science students act like I’ve said the most revolutionary thing they’ve ever heard and that I’m a genius for figuring all of this out on my own. Meanwhile, they’re talking about, like, curing incurable diseases like it’s just another Tuesday.
My father-in-law- who voted for Trump because "he said that he was going to make groceries cheaper-" just called my husband complaining about how he's not going to have any money from SNAP next month.
Of course my husband told him that it's because of the shut down since republicans are being babies about some racist shit, and of course his dad shut tried to shut that conversation down.
I was trying to watch something so I mostly just heard bits and pieces, but apparently my husband talked about how much we have to pay for groceries on top of our bills as a way to subtly hint that he can't start buying groceries for every member of his family who depends on benefits who voted to lose them.
To be fair, we're doing okay financially so far. We just won't be if we also have to feed his family as well. Plus we know that if we help them even a little they will expect us to help them forever, rather they need it or not.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Man, some of the criticism (if you can call it that) that is lobbied at Hazbin Hotel is giving me such major Steven Universe flashbacks.
I just saw someone say that the show was ultimately "pro-fascist" bc the show is "showing both the alt-right and far-left as the same" since the angels and their gift baskets weren't shown to be as bad as Vox during the rally. (I need some of you to look up what "dramatic irony" is for me.)
It's making me flashback to people calling Rebecca Sugar a nazi since Steven didn't shatter the diamonds.
Hmm, a queer afab person who created a musical cartoon being called a fascist bc they weren't given as much time as they wanted to tell their story. History really does rhyme...
I have a few wishes.
Our collective birthday is coming up. I have ideas. If anyone feels like gifting at me. However you perceive me, please draw me that way. My only request is that you place a beauty mark by the corner of my left eye and keep my eyes a dark color. (They are customizable, but I prefer them nearly black.)
any kind of art/writing of me, and/or Soup Rick (iykyk)
me and @starburst-rick dancing or doing something recreational or in a fusion like from Steven Universe
me doing happy flapping
any art related to the kinks listed in my pinned (sizeplay, soft vore, fearplay, etc)
me with you and/or your OC ♥
praise :] or whatever else you got
I'll add more to this as I get other ideas.
the fanart only shows up on my dash the second my little brother looks at my screen istg
