#personal poem

@sodapoems for more of my original poetry

Who am I?

Who's the "real me"?

Is he there?

Is he still here?

In the mirror,

I see someone.

But that's not me,

This I fear.

Why can't I

See the me I know?

See the me I feel?

Where is he?

All I see,

Someone I don't know.

When will they see,

The man that I know?

tw: depression, suicidal ideation, addiction

covered in old thorns and pines each prick and nick me, paired with vines dont you think its time? and they take their pick from behind

itll be there, waiting debating if youll live another twenty or if this time youll be ready to join the other plenty

death rate is gaping theres no point in breaking what theyre expecting lamictal and risperdal take ten and hurdle, be accepting this is the path to be chosen

i dont feel like myself, im lacking emotion this isnt helping, all of this oxytocin pill after pill, they tell me its working tell them its not but my mouth isnt alerting gums flared, mouths filled with cotton.

I sit on the wet grass.

My eyes are closed.

My body is bleeding.

I can feel the insects touching my knees. They’re poisoned by my blood.

The sky is screaming, trying to prove she’s worth it. So drop your pious swords, I’m devoted to my rage.

I get up with wobbling legs.

I’m a deer covered in grime and metal.

My progress is deemed admirable.

This body a host of memory.

Weekly prompt, hosted by: @picklemafia

But, it…

Didn’t make me a tyrant.

If I had my way

migrants wouldn’t need let in.

Since borders are reliant

On the color of your skin.

Didn’t you hear?

Chem trails turned the frogs gay!

They want to destroy national parks.

They don’t care

about pollution or

Corruption.

Release the Epstein files!

5 mass shootings have been

By trans people

How many from those like you?

There are bad seeds everywhere!

Does your wife know you

Touch children

down there?

Down stairs?

Autism isn’t from a pill

or

vaccine

It is not a disease

It is not

something

that can be

eradicated

Trannys and the ‘tism:

Are here to stay!

As long as people

Like me have got

A Say!

A path I wandered out of.

My steps are hasty and my heart anxious.

Never should I have turned from You.

Forgive me for not knowing You.

Help me find my way back to You.

My soul is a drought when estranged from You

As imperfectly as my heart can

It reaches.

Teach me Your way—

to love,

Mighty Goddess of the liminal spaces,

Borderless night-wanderer.

Hekate, born of the Stary Night,

She who blessed all the souls,

I'll let your darkness swallow me,

Those beautiful, brown eyes, I pray they know no cries. When his touch I feel, Only the joy remains real.

A strong hand and a gentle embrace, Sends my heart off on a race. That look and a soft kiss, Such a sensation I will forever miss.

changing personalities like wardrobes.

never quite feeling right in my skin.

searching for something in each new me.

as if anything could ever make me feel whole.

the illusion of identity.

a cracked mirror reflecting back at itself.

the longing to feel at home in.

me.

me.