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I think chronic/ passive suicidal ideation is akin to the non descriptive feeling of homesickness while you are still at home. A sense of “I want to go home” without knowing what your brain means by “home”. All you know is you long for it
Me rn
doodle inspired by a tweet i saw :3

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HE WAS 25 WHEN HE DIED???? FUFKING TWENTY FIVE????
HE WAS 21 DURRIMG TORCHWOOD ONE. HE WAS FUCKING 22 WHEN HE MET JACK. OF CORSE HE TRIED TO KILL HIMSELF, HIS ENTIRE LIFE ENDED BEFORE HE HIT TWENTY THREE.
Dude. I'm losing my mind. Everything makes so much more sense now.
He was kind of selfish and short sighted? He was 23. Of course he was.
He changed drastically as the show progressed, maturing a lot? Of course he did, he was in his early twentys.
He was weirdly horny about a lot of stuff? HE'S TWENTY THREE. FUCKING OF CROUSE HE ISS.
This is the worst information i've ever heard. They would've had so much time together. He was so young.
Of course he made rash decisions. Of course he was impulsive. Of course he had a lot to learn. Of course he almost burned down the world because of his first real girlfriend. OF COURS EHE WAS A PA. HE WAS TWENTY.
He was a fucking baby.
Genuinely every rewatch/listen is going to make me even more upset now. I thought he was at least late twentys at the start, into at LEAST his thirtys when he died. I thought he just looked young.
OH MY GOD ALL THE SHIT THAT HAPPENED TO HIM IN "the death of captain jack" HE WAS LIKE 21 FOR.
AUFH
Fucking no wonder he tried to kill himself after getting his shit absolutely rocked by murderers. Of course he was confused about his sexuality. Of course he found solice in his very attractive boss's bed. OF COURSE HE HAD ISSUES WITH HIS BORDERLINE ABUSIVE FATHER. HE WAS LIKE TWENTY TWO.
Of course he didn't have a sense of identity.
OF COURSE HE LOVES THE BOND MOVIES AND STAR WARS HE'S A BABY. HE WAS A TEENAGER LIKE FOUR MINUTES AGO.
i want a gun so i can blow my fucking brains out
The difference between Sirius and Regulus is passive suicidality and active suicidality btw