Epochs Unblemished DVD commentary, as requested by modtier!
So this fic. It was written for the Shipping Olympics this summer, meaning it had to be under a certain length and, for this particular challenge, in the canon setting. I am thankful for the generous mods who considered my vague, pre-Cascade extrapolations on the Scratch compatible with canon.
There are a lot of parts here that I continually read over (past and present tense there) with a frowny face, but overall I think it was at least coherent, though I will forever remember it as the Fic Of The Four Emergency Beta Reads.
This first bit is probably my favorite part, partly because the rest swiftly descends into "how the hell do I tragic fated love story" and partly because I really like third-person descriptions of Aradia Megido.
âItâs interesting to think about," Aradia says. Sparks jump from the stones she strikes together and ignite easily on the strange brush. No one could find any trees to burn; those are few and far-between and they take what they can get, even if the leaves are tough and an odd lurid sap clots around each stem. They huddle around the flames, distinctly aware that there isnât enough fuel to keep burning through the night. Day will come, and they will retreat under the low cliff overhang, bodies pressed close together as they shrink away from the light. The sun isnât as terrible here as the ferocious rays on Alternia, but it stings and sears and Kanaya doesnât want to expose the others to more pain. It will only get warmer each year.
âHumans all age at exactly the same rate. There is no sudden onset of puberty that screws everything up and leaves some of them in the dust while the others rocket to adulthood.â She smiles, but her teeth glint in the firelight as she bites her lower lip. âThey can grow old together."
Kanaya stands and stretches. Two pairs of eyes shine at her in the dark, yellow and black and shot through with more blood coloring every day. The other pair watches her blindly.
âAre you sure you wonât stay another night?â she asks, looking at Aradia closely.
She shakes her head, lashes lowered. âI need to get Sollux, now that youâre settled. And make sure the humans stay safe.â The bright reds of her outfit glint fiercely, and her wings gather the warm light.
Kanaya remembers the legend of a terrible demoness weaving through time to alter the course of civilization from its genesis. She stirs the fire with a knobby stick of bizarre texture, too flimsy and damp for any other use. The others watch her like thereâs a chance she has any idea what the hell sheâs doing.
Sheâll take the first watch.
 The light of the Green Sun is intense enough to burn as it refracts off of her glittering skin. Rose has to squint to look at her, and Kanaya feels the urge to apologize.
If I remember correctly, the image of this scene is what birthed this entire fic. All of this weird age angst is really just secondary. I think Rose/Kanaya is a very visually dynamic pairing, and a lot of that comes with color contrasts and grand sweeping floaty dresses in zero gravity. I think that is very important. To their relationship.
They float in dead space, sixteen all together, both the deceased and the living. They watch a universe tear itself apart.
Around them the Ring is whistling like light speed, and the color is ripping from Roseâs face (her clothes, her hair) like sheâs being drained, spiraling away into some metaphysical black hole in the middle of a quasi-dimension that Kanaya hopes to God someone understands. John stares at his hand, bewildered, as pieces of himself speed out and away towards a brand new Earth. Jade grabs onto Daveâs hand.
I ship Jade/Dave really hard is this appropriate commentary?? I also wish I had had time/wordcount space to expand on the other kidsâ roles in the Scratched universe because it would have been really fun.
âI once preserved my memories exactly like this, in a doomed timeline,â Rose shouts, like she canât hear her own voice. âI fell asleep.â
The first of many segments in which I panicked about clarity in the mechanics.
âKanaya,â she says, and there is something damning in her smile. âWe did what we meant to. There is nowhere else to go.â
âWeâll follow you!â she shouts back, and feels her insides draining, leaving her frozen with panic. They have thrown themselves over the precipice and she is grasping emptily at the air. âIâll come with you, thereâs still time-â
Hands clutch at her face; lips smash against hers in desperation. Rose kisses her like sheâs dying. For all they know, she might as well be.
When Rose draws back, Kanaya watches the last golden bits fly out of her hair. The lines of her empty face start to crumble, falling in on themselves in a nightmare display as the touch of her fingers becomes insubstantial.
There are a lot of times in which I wish I could animate, or get a whole animation studio to display what Iâm not capable of doing in words AT ALL. This is definitely one of those times.
The Scratch takes her away to begin again.
Kanaya is left alone after her first kiss, her friends lined up solemnly behind her.
 âThatâs it?â Karkat asks incredulously, staring down at the skinny dead animal Terezi drops in front of the fire.
âItâs all I could get,â she says, lips twisted ruefully. âWhatever it is it moved in packs, with way too many to survive on the vegetation around here.â
âWhat, has natural selection not rid this planet of the completely retarded species yet?â He prods it in disgust, then pinches the skin of its foreleg. âFuck natural selection. Jegus, if there were any less meat here it would count as a vegan entrĂŠe.â
In the original draft this is the part where Ember told me that there was basically no way I could get away with implying that evolution worked like this, so Kanaya had to cut in FOR SCIENCE. (Yes I was originally going to leave Karkatâs explanation uncontested. Yes I am that shoddy.)
âKarkat, those were a lot of illogical things you just said.â Kanaya tries to coax the fire a little higher for cooking purposes. âItâs just that the ecosystem isnât meant to support us at this point. Weâll have to make do, or start fixing things ourselves.â
âFix an entire planet? Thatâs maggots.â
I wish I was better at Karkatâs dialog, I really do. There were so many creative options here.
âI meant that we could begin to grow our own food, or attempt some sort of irrigation. We have a little gristââ
âKanaya,â Karkat says, and sits down heavily at her side. âThis was a terrible idea.â
âI know,â she replies. They sit silently for a moment while Terezi begins cutting the beast open, knife too quickly hitting bone.
âKnowing you, you regret it even less than I do,â he grumbles, and she smiles just slightly.
This tiny, pathetic segment is the closest to Karkat<>Kanaya I have ever come. Hopefully I can actually write that pairing sometime because it makes my insides kind of melty.
 She finds her again in the Land of Strings and Sunshine.
The planet is terribly reminiscent of Roseâs, strong light streaming down onto glaring white islands. The chief difference lies in the matrix that seems to connect each piece of land; the ice cream-pink towers spawn sharp, steel strings that glint rainbow colors on the water. In some places she has to hack away with her chainsaw to clear a path through the air. Several times she is cut deeply by threads she canât even see. Instead of sand, each shore is filled with snow. The rivers run darker, like red and purple wine.
I could have spent a lot more time designing R. Lalondeâs land than I did. But in my defense, the alpha kids werenât a thing yet. Sure.
Kanaya sees her speeding over the waves, arm extended, and her chest seizes right up.
Even as the name leaves her lips she knows that this is not who she is looking for. The angles of her face are similar, with some of the same mystery running tight around her eyes, but her chin is the wrong shape and her smirk entirely too airy. When she adjusts her course to land, Kanaya wants to tell her not to bother.
âSo youâre one of the infamous trolls Iâve heard so much about,â the girl says, feet sinking into the snow, and it almost hurts because all of the dangerous barbs are hidden too carefully in teacup-chipper tones. She wears lighter colors, too much pink to be genuine. Kanaya canât believe that she could have possibly mistaken this imposter for Rose.
I was actually really excited to write about âMom as a kidâ though?? Like, my guesses could have been worse. I figured sheâd be more emotive on the outside than Rose, hyper-sugary and very pink. Though as you can see, I was also under the impression that it would all be an OFF-PUTTING RUSE to hide her truly dangerous and near-cruel intentions. So.
Her hand clenches around the tube of lipstick in her pocket. She swallows down her protests and asks, âWhere can I find your guardian?â
The game gets complicated, and she doesnât really find Rose until sheâs cycled through to the Land of Acid and Blaze. As she draws closer she finds it harder and harder to breathe (not just because of the smoke thick on the air) and when she finally sees over the blackened crest her lungs stop working altogether.
Originally this scene had adult!Dave in it. Iâm still bitter about having to cut him out, but I was rubbing up against my word limit and he literally added nothing. He didnât even talk. He just stood back-to-back with Rose looking simultaneously like a badass and a complete tool, and I didnât have the wordcount left to make him do anything like, I dunno, join in the conversation?? So it was weird.
Her wands swish back and forth like conducting batons as imps explode around her. Her hair has grown to her shoulders, and she moves with more grace and purpose than should be possible from someone standing ankle-deep in green goo, purple destruction springing from each hand. Her skirt is long and trailing and magnificent, curled up by some unearthly power to avoid mucking the edges, and there is quiet malice in her smile. She looks like a character out of the novels Kanaya used to snuggle up with in her hive, but with more sharp edges.
In my head Rose looked a lot cooler than I managed to get onto paper. Pointy dramatic witch lady.
The battle clears. Kanaya suddenly feels very small and out of place.
Rose seems to have stretched straight upwards, barely developing the curves of her guardian (daughter?), and her face is longer and even more alien than it had seemed before, and she is so astoundingly beautiful that all Kanaya can do is start running again like the child she is, scrambling down the crumbling slope as chunks of charcoal fall around her.
âRose!â she calls (it feels like her voice is hoarse from calling), and the woman raises a wand.
âRose, I-â she stumbles to a stop and raises her hands. She has to look too far upward to make eye contact. âIâm not sure of the mechanics of the Scratch, or how successful your attempts to preserve your consciousness were, or if you will need reminding or have lost certain segments of your memory forever.â She speaks too quickly, but she canât stop herself. âBut really the only thing Iâd like to know is if you remember who I am, and if perhaps you could lower your weapon.â
Rose raises an eyebrow as she complies, all quick, elegant motions that speak volumes. Kanaya looks up at her face, trying so hard to tell herself that she doesnât expect anything.
âIâm sorry,â Rose says, âI donât recall.â
It took me a very long time to get the emotion in this scene anything close to right. Itâs nowhere near perfect.
 By the time Aradia comes backwards with Sollux, the rest have built a hive. Itâs tucked into the rock wall, far enough from the shallow river that they can avoid the more annoying predators. Their lawn ring is greener by far than the rest of the surrounding area, possibly the planet, and they grow crops that might even be considered of nutritional value. Kanaya is in charge of the gardening, and Karkat has been trying to wrangle up some of the less threatening creatures to create a flock. It wouldnât be enough or the right kind of food to support a humanâs needs, and the sun is still too cold and distant for creatures used to being bathed in light, but trolls can struggle on.
Listen, just ignore the timeline here. Ignore the way astronomy works and the way evolution works and the way troll lifespans work. Weâll all be happier for it.
âThis should be about right,â Aradia says worriedly. âI did my best to compensate for our different lifespans, but some things are hard to calculate.â She glances unsubtly at Karkat, who crossess his arms with a defensive snarl.
âLook, Iâm fine. Iâm a mutant freak whoâs growing as slow as Kanaya.â Thatâs not quite true, but Kanaya doesnât call him on it. They have both nearly reached maturity.
She feels a rising excitement that she has suppressed for a long time.
 Fuck it I am not reformatting this shit.
TT: I remember certain things about the old Earth, but only with prompting.
TT: After our first conversation, I saw my daughter and recalled playing in the snow.
 GA: Yes I Remember That Too
GA: I Mean I Remember You
GA: Doing That
TT: Which in the context of the current Earth is utterly ridiculous, because only the suicidal would purposefully expose themselves to the Yeti and the Snowmen.
TT: As well as the rest of the array of life-threatening creatures that apparently never existed before a rash decision on our part.
 GA: Well Rash Isnt Quite The Right Term I Think
TT: Could enough consideration possibly exist in this world to sufficiently grapple with the repercussions of rewriting a universe? Of course I of all people would be an exemplary participant in this decision-making process. It was all very civil, Iâm sure.
 GA: Somehow Even Your Self-Deprecation Comes Across As Condescending
TT: I also remember you, in flashes.
TT: Just small pieces. Something about a scarf, or a bit of creative dialog.
TT: Meeting you in a strange, floating world that I can only assume is the Ring.
TT: Once I thought I remembered saying goodbye, but Iâve lost it now.
TT: Kanaya?
 GA: You Should Be Helping Your Daughter
-- grimAuxiliatrix [GA] ceased trolling tacticalTerminologist [TT] â
 I had a bit of fun imagining the ridiculous creatures that would undoubtedly populate reset Earth, since obviously the trolls got such big things to defeat. My ideal scenario would be a bunch of mythical figures and/or previously harmless holiday symbols going on destructive rampages (Basically my ideal scenario would be a Doctor Who Christmas special).
 Johnâs granddaughter opens the door.
I considered going into a (hypothetical) image of Grandpa!John. Then IâŚdidnât for some reason. Iâm pretty sure I reasoned it away with the wordcount but it would have worked well with the later age theme.
Light pours out, blinding the eclectic array of trolls and humans of all ages that stand before the threshold as they look out into a new universe. They all hold hands. Recognition explodes across Roseâs bruised face and Kanayaâs heart leaps into her mouth; she has been watching her expressions so closely.
As she steps through it feels like falling, except there is no question where she will land. She will survive, has survived, has obtained the ultimate reward and will descend like a shooting star into a world primed for life and civilization. They will begin anew.
She rushes past stars and stars.
 Roseâs legs are long and graceful, dangling above the water. She perches primly on a large mossy boulder, just before a trickling waterfall. âThis enclosure is beautiful, but unfortunately it reminds me a bit too much of my old house, hence my refusal to build here.â
Kanaya stands before her, knee-deep and sloshing in the water. âYour paradise planet is incredible,â she says. âI couldnât imagine anything better.â They both sense the lie. Heat prickles against the back of her neck.
Rose uncrosses her legs. âYour skin is lovely in this light,â she says softly, and raises a hand to fix her own bangs.
Kanaya lunges forward to catch it, overbalancing awkwardly and splashing Roseâs heavy skirt. She squeezes too tightly. âRose, I want you to know thatââ
âYouâve always rambled,â Rose says, and almost smiles. Kanayaâs heart beats in quick time.
âYouâŚremember?â The words are heavy with wonder and cautious hope.
I hate this part. I hate how I set up Roseâs memory as the problem and then fix it just like THAT, only to replace it with a problem that hasnât even come up yet? It was bad.
Itâs written in Roseâs face, more brilliant and shining than ever before, like itâs fallen from the sky with the rest of them. There isnât any doubt anymore, and Kanaya could sing for joyâ
But there is too much pity and regret traced in those thin dark lips. Kanaya sees how clumsy and childish her hands look next to Roseâs elegant fingers.
This is around the part where June said âSo the only problem is that Rose doesnât want to bang Kanaya because sheâs prepubescent?â WELL WHEN YOU PUT IT LIKE THAT.
Rose can slay demons and hoodwink the gods, but Rose cannot wait for her. She will age so quickly; even now small wrinkles hide between her knuckles.
So I had to do some clumsy clarification about the role of death and stuff, as seen above.
Kanaya closes her mouth and feels a shudder rock her, traveling from the chill water up through her neck and behind her eyelids, leaking out to spill down her cheeks. She shivers, draws one hand away to wipe furiously at her face.
She feels so terribly young.
Rose doesnât speak, but her hand clenches.
âIâm sorry,â Kanaya says. âIâm so sorry.â
âPlease,â she hears, too soft, and for a long time she canât make herself look up to see Roseâs face. She feels a tremor run between their skins.
Finally she raises her chin, defiant. Rose is watching her, wide-eyed and almost young herself.
âListen to me very carefully, Rose,â (her voice breaks, but she pushes harder, staring her down like sheâs slaying monsters), âI will come back. I donât care how long it takes; Iâll come back and weâll finish things the way we should have before you decided to become abysmally impulsive and ruin absolutely everything and then deigned to handily forget everything important for an age and a half.â
I do like this whole bit. Iâll admit to that.
She starts to pull her hand away, then thinks better of it.
âAre you giving me reason to?â Rose says, but she looks so incredulous and shaken that Kanaya canât make out any hope around the edges.
âYes,â she gasps, halfway to a sob. She leans down to brush a wet kiss against Roseâs knuckles. When she finally pulls back she scrunches her eyes shut against the rest of the tears.
âI will see you tomorrow,â she says with finality, and turns away.
 Rose sees Kanaya the next day.
Kanaya doesnât see Rose for a hundred years.
Aradia takes them backwards. They fight and they struggle, in an ecosystem not yet meant for civilized life, because itâs worth it and it will never stop being worth it. She wanted to go alone, but Karkat wouldnât let her; the others were quick to follow. Each of them had a reason, be it a stupid human they wanted to live out their adult lives with or a friend they didnât want to leave. They couldnât let go if they tried.
Two of the four people who read this fic before publishing originally had no idea what the hell was going on with this part. This story needed SO MUCH POLISHING I canât even express to you omg
So they carry on, watching the sun brighten and the planets turn.
Aradia guessed right about Sollux; the two of them grow from the later point in the timeline she placed them until when they finally, finally see the lights raining down through the star-swirled sky theyâre in almost the same stage of development as everyone else.
They all follow the stars to their landing points, but avoid coming too close. When their past selves go back in time to begin the cycle, Aradia says she hears a ringing sound in her ears.
 One hundred years she has waited. Kanaya doesnât know how to begin.
Her horns have grown longer, her arms more muscled. Her cheekbones are more cut-glass defined than ever, and she is just barely taller than Rose. She is wearing a dress of her own making, blue and buttercup yellow and made of everything she loves about this world. She has been embroidering it for a very long time.
If I could illustrate one thing in this fic (besides Juneâs lovely image from the first scene) it would be this dress. This conversation, really, but especially the dress. It would have to be this SUPER COMPLEX thing, though, and even though I was really lazy about the description, actually seeing it would have to be like seeing ALL OF KANAYAâS HOPES AND DREAMS FOREVER. So have fun with that.
âHello,â she says, standing in front of Roseâs makeshift hive like a prodigal come home. Rose looks at her with something like shock, resting her hand on the doorframe.
Kanayaâs lips are still parted, but the words she wants to say donât come, because suddenly everything is tremendous and on the verge of breaking. Her legs feel weak beneath her.
âI believe I made you a promise,â she chokes as her vision wavers.
Rose nods, still incoherent, and breathes deeply. âIâŚyes.â Warm sunlight glints off her hair.
Kanaya raises her arms awkwardly, almost afraid. Rose extends one hand to meet her, and their fingers touch in the middle; Kanaya wraps Roseâs hand in hers and raises the knuckles to her lips.
Roseâs own lips have gone white. âI believe,â she says, her eyes starting to swim, âI believe this is the part where I slapdashedly offer you a cup of terrible coffee to cover our gawking hides.â
I owe Ember a thousand kisses for making me change the above line from some lame shit about âwhy donât you come insideâ into something that Rose would actually say.
Kanayaâs smile breaks into radiance as she practically flings herself into Roseâs arms.
And then Max wrote sexings the end.