#parentingishard

#Parenting101: Tantrums suck, but is my response to them making it more stressful? A classic example of: “Most of your stress comes from the way you respond, not the way life is. Adjust your attitude, and most of that extra stress is gone.” Shout out to this blue eyed cutie who gave me a hell of a time this weekend. Whose crazy blue eyes and attitude combined made me think he was an alien... 🤩 He’s at that age... “He’s designed to challenge you.” 😜 I recognized it wasn’t his behavior that I couldn’t handle, but my own reaction to it that was creating more stress. Of course, this isn’t ALWAYS true. But in this (and many cases), it was. It wasn’t him I had to control (#goodluck 😂), it was how I was reacting to it that was adding to my stress. Things I did to ground myself and reset: 1: Hide in closet 😂 🔑 2: For the rest of the day, put us in situations where I didn’t have to say, “No, stop doing/touching that,” to everything. (This is called situation support, where you help modify your situation to support you better.) 3: Breathe. 💨 When I felt my patience was thin and my blood pressure rise, stop. Walk to a different room. Take deep breaths until I physically felt my heart rate lower and the pressure in my chest go... Did it change his tantrums? No. But it helped me stay sane through the worst of it. 🤪 (Why do we even talk about the “terrible twos” when I’m continually told the 3’s are worse 💁🏼‍♀️) #timeforahaircut #terribletwos #situationsupport #stress #stressmanagement #stressless #parenting #parentingishard #tempertantrum #tempertantrums #momlife #singlemom #singlemomlife #singlemama #toddlerlife #blueeyes #blueeyedcutie #bossmom #expatmom #momboss #patience #responddontreact #selfhelp #mindset #mindsetmatters #mindsetreset #reset #resetbutton (at Breezes Restaurant) https://www.instagram.com/p/CVgF_hQv1Ya/?utm_medium=tumblr

You must also, be a dad.

When you wake up from your nap looking like this! The sad part is both Darryl and I second guessed removing that book before her nap. #parentingishard #toddlermoment #whogave her a pen.

I'm so nauseous today as I sit here waiting for my daughter to come back from getting a biopsy of a left renal mass. I think about all the things I would do if I was the nurse but I'm not. I have no control at all. I feel like I am out of the decision making process. The doctors and nurses caring for her listen but all they see is a mom. I can see myself in their raised eyebrows, smile, and nod. I want to scream wait please listen I know my child. But that won't help. I'll be the overly emotional mom then. I don't take care of kids but my patients have similar things happen to them. My kid has now been in and out of the hospital this summer 3 times. We have been through the ringer. I know what works for her and what doesn't. Please listen. Don't patronize me. I have some of the same training you have. Please be up front and honest to me and my daughter. Don't tell me how the mass hasn't grown that much when it has grown 1 cm all the way around in less than 30 days. If you don't have an answer then just say that or even nothing at all. I can read ultrasounds, CT's, X-rays, and MRIs. Maybe not as well as you but I can see where the mass is located and that it's not fluid. We are here to get the biopsy to get answers we know you don't have them. Please please please look after my child while you take her away. She is an awesome person with a bright future. She pretends to have it all under control even when she is scared to death inside. She doesn't like people to see her cry so please be aware behind that stoic facade is a scared little girl. And you are leaving behind a scared mom who cannot hold my first born hand while you sedate, intubated, and poke her with big needles. Who is also trying not to cry behind this stoic facade.

Karena merasa menjadi yang paling mencinta namun nyatanya aku hanyalah pencipta luka

I can’t do anything right. I’m so stupid/ugly/useless. I suck. No one likes me… If it would break your heart to hear them speak to themselves like this, why is it ok for you to speak like this to yourself? You are their example. Hurt people hurt people… but healed people heal people. What cycle do you want to pass down? Be the example. It starts with you. Show them. #rolemodels #parenting #parentingishard #selflove #selftalk #selfrespect #selfcompassion #parenting101 #blendedfamily #blendedfamilylove #internationallifecoach #healedpeoplehealpeople #internaldialogue #innerwork #innerworld #hurtpeoplehurtpeople #positiveselftalk #selfdevelopment #lifelessons #quotestoliveby #quotestoinspire #loveyourself #loveyou https://www.instagram.com/p/Cm7Uch4IDHz/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

I have a head cold, so I’m miserable and off the charts anxious about another ear infection. . I had to get a kid out of the house early drive an hour and still arrive late because of a required lengthy poop stop. . Oh, and I was taking my kid to his third day of neuro-educational evaluation. . You bet your sweet bippy that when we got a lunch break and I rolled over to @outback I gave my kid my phone and you tube and I watched a movie on my tablet. And I’ve got no shame at all about it. . I needed the break. HE needed the break. . He was so patient waiting 3 hrs for my emergency ent appt. And then a 1.5 hr drive home (thanks beach traffic) that a trip to @target for a reward was in order. . After the stop for milkshakes. . In the span of 9 hrs I did all the things I dislike doing (rewarding behavior with food; buying more crap to clutter my house; ignoring my kid during a meal). . And I’m fairly sure I don’t regret one damn moment. . I hope Friday has some peace and quiet in store for you. . It’s PNO at our local Y - so I’m watching the sunset and ignoring everything. And I needed it. . . . #parentingIsHard #ScreenTime #heAteHalfMyLunchToo (at Outback Steakhouse) https://www.instagram.com/p/Cb05IBFAhes/?utm_medium=tumblr

Porch settin to recharge some batteries. We talk lots about self care for Moms. But it seems about impossible to make time for some relationship care when you have littles. We were lucky enough to have some time away this weekend. . Tbh, it’s the most time I’ve spent with my spouse in six years. Time that we weren’t juggling obligations or trying to cram some quality time into 4 hours. : One of the things we talked about was how we have changed in 6 years; And remembering to really listen to each other. And it was kind of exhausting. And kind of wonderful. . And it really drew into sharp focus how much we delight in our parenthood, but how draining and demanding trying to be a good parent can be. . My biggest struggle still is losing any time alone. So making time to spend w my spouse feels like an imposition. Like I get put last. And I’m trying to reframe my reaction to that. . Any brilliant advice for magically having more time and energy so you don’t feel spread so thinly? . I’ll even take bad ideas. Anyone? . . . #introvertProblems #selfCareForMoms #parentingisHard (at Jekyll Island Club Resort) https://www.instagram.com/p/CbqUesjpZ57/?utm_medium=tumblr