#parameddic

Trauma Starters @parameddic said: “’I survived it’ isn’t usually what you say about positive experiences.” (for Carlos?)

The comment had been said mostly in passing, his mind drifting somewhere between the moment and the past, so when he heard the comment from TK he snapped back to the present and looked over at him.

Yes and no. There would be different versions of Jeanie, just like there are different versions of BJ (and I suppose, really, most people have different personas for different environments). BJ likes leaving his work at the door, you know. Once he's off the clock, he likes to be off the clock, and having a strong separate persona for work, especially sex work, helps him work and helps him relax after work.

So sex worker Jeanie vs. dancer Jeanie vs. casual just-for-himself Jeanie would all look and behave differently and I don't think BJ would necessarily consider them the "same" Jeanie. Each would have different backstories in his head that help give them their own personality, depending on what he needs from them, and each would dress a little differently. Exaggerations, I guess. Sex worker Jeanie is more at ease with sex and her body than BJ is and isn't as afraid to hold boundaries, dancer Jeanie is confident and isn't afraid to get a little theatric and vulnerable in front of a crowd, and casual Jeanie is a bit less flashy and everything BJ wishes he could be if he could go back in time and rescue himself sooner, or was born completely differently. Jeanie, no matter which Jeanie it is, is the embodiment of self-love for BJ, and the kind of person he'd like to be.

Is she how BJ sees himself inside? Not quite, I think his vision of his "real self" is a lot more abstract, but Jeanie is completely detached from Barry James and all the baggage he carries, and she's a lot closer to his vision than not.

That said, I do think Jeanie would be born either after a client requests that BJ dress in drag, or slowly on its own with BJ giving in to a desire to experiment and a friend complimenting or encouraging him. I'm softest about the latter, but that can happen regardless. I think it'd be most fun to make the reason different for each verse because the point isn't really how she's created, but that at some point, Jeanie will exist because she makes BJ so happy.

"One."

Crack!

"Two."

Crack!

"Three..."

The horsewhip came brutally across the young man's back a third time. A fourth, fifth, and final sixth that rang against the cold cellar walls with metronomic timing. Slow, assessing, Cale tilted his head at his newest work. The strikes had not split skin, but blood was blooming rapidly to the surface, streaking the man's bare back with angry, red marks. Good. These would serve as reminder enough, and that done, there was no point in rushing the rest of their time together just yet. Cale might as well enjoy and make the best of a bad situation.

"Look at me, Tyler"

Tyler, his little accident. Bound tightly at the wrists and ankles to keep him from trying to run, and his body, naked but for his underwear, was forced to bend uncomfortably at the knees and waist over a metal rail which served both as support to keep him from completely toppling and kept him in the proper position for whipping. Too, a thick, leather collar hung loosely enough to chaffe around his neck, pulled down by a chain fastened low to the floor. This was not an aesthetic choice; Tyler had been in this position for almost twelve hours now, and the chain kept him from straightening his legs, his back, or relieving the muscles that Cale knew must be straining. Humiliation, stress, helplessness... These were all important tools in breaking a spirited animal.

"I said, look at me."

Cale knotted his fist into Tyler's hair and yanked his head up. The chain around the paramedic's neck rattled.

It's super late and I'm reeeeeally sleepy like barely awake and I stared at the envelope way too long bc I thought it was a slice of cheese.

So here's a snail enjoying cheese for you. I drew it with my finger on my phone but he's full of love. And cheese.

She had been in Austin for four months. The first three were for setting up the shop; building the bookcases, organizing the rooms, pricing and shelving all the books. A month before opening she’d put out a call for gently used books, and was heartily responded to, cementing her belief that the move from California was the right one. The building did not yet overflow with books, but she was certain it was only a matter of time. The shop had been open a month, and business was going well enough—not booming by any metric, but a steady trickle that’ll keep the lights on. Her apartment was another matter entirely, still filled with boxes that needed unpacking.

She was among the stacks when she heard the soft jingle of the bell on the door. “Welcome to Strange Matters!” Rei called out, continuing to shelve books. “Let me know if I can help you find anything, and if you’re just popping in to ask about the name, it’s a Shakespeare reference!” With the last book returned to its shelf, she headed back to the front desk, smiling at her new customer. His appearance struck her as familiar, and she blinked a few times. “I feel like I’ve seen you before. You ever been to LA? Because I’ve barely left this shop since I moved here,” she laughed, returning to her waiting chair.

nervousness practically buzzes around liam. on the other side of the threshold they stand still in the same clothes they walked out of the station in, some loose button down and pants-- both colorful of course. if anything's changed it's the now present redness all over their face. liam can't hide that no matter how much they force their face into a smile.

the door is already open, tk's already stepped aside to let them in, but they're still trying to justify the unannounced visit. "emmett's not answering his phone and roxy's got a shift and--" and tk was next on their list for people to turn to. the small box in their hands shakes as she takes a loud breath in. she almost forgot about it, despite the absolute detour she went on for it. stepping into the home, she extends the box out towards tk. it's a pack of hot pockets.

"i- sorry this is kind of the best i could do." liam's never shown up anywhere empty handed, and even a moment like this isn't an exception. matter of fact, they feel like they probably should have bought more or at least that it was owed. "it's a two pack. one for you, one for carlos."