#paleomemes

1 week left 'til 4 years of waiting finally pay off

“I've watched this like 20 times now” (Prehistoric Planet 2 trailer)

“Hi yes I am me, an exemplar of our species. A prime specimen.”

*visible confusion while reading the Colossal website*

“Turkeys can be terrifying. Birds are terrifying in general”

“That’s David Attenbourough not a bird.”

“Thank you for clarifying.”

“You’re welcome! It’s what I’m here for! This is why I have a Ph.d!”

“You need to have a healthy bullshit meter to read any paleontology paper.”

“As I keep telling you, life hates us.”

“Look at the size of the head compared to the body. This is just stupid.”

“Look at the butt of that thing!”

*measures with hands on screen*

“This is a stupid looking animal.” (Cotylorhynchus romeri)

"for example comparing femur robustness is ... what does that even mean?"

“You can laugh…this is a stupid looking creature!”

“Then of course you have your penis worms.”

“Holding fossils from the Burgess Shale is a religious experience.”

“It would be a very mossy world, which I am not opposed to. I like moss :)”

“Taxonomy is a clusterfuck.”

“This is probably one of the most ridiculous animals to have ever evolved.” (Whales)

“It looks like a strange monster from the black lagoon.” (Maiacetus)

“It’s a magical Liopleurodon!”

*does push ups on a table to show us how a fish would have walked*

*showing us a video of a crocodile taken by someone in the water*

“Do NOT do this. Don’t jump into the water with a crocodile. It will end very badly :(“

“This was like one of the weirdest papers I’ve seen. Alright so Ken Carpenter is a very legitimate paleontologist in Colorado. He normally worked with dinosaurs but he also decided to try and figure out how mosasaurs swim. So you look at the skeleton but then you also put two undergrads in a pool, one grabbing the other one's legs to see how that double-limb locomotion would work. It's like the kookiest thing I’ve ever seen published… but yeah I'm not even sure how he got the approval for this… I don’t think this was grant funded… “I would like some undergrad volunteers to jump in a pool, one holding the other ones legs to see if they will drown.””

*rants about the size of the mosasaur in Jurassic World and debates with a student whether or not an actual size mosasaur could pull a T. Rex into the water*

“I like owls. They look like they are wearing trousers :)”

"The Ice Age movie was a missed opportunity. There were so many cool animals they could have used and they didn't use ANY of them! There were giant ground sloths that were so big you can stand in their fossilized burrows! Yeah sure we have that one guy...what's his name...Sid? Yeah sure we have Sid but Sid is NOT a giant ground sloth. That's not even mentioning all of the horses and bison and bears and lions! Its disappointing!"

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