#opt outside

1) reached out to a new primary care facility for a new patient appointment

2) set up new patient dentist, my last one stopped taking my insurance

3) set up to see a specialty post op for management

4) set up for the ole k pop demon slayer (koda the Doggo) to be groomed. He’s a 120 lb Great Pyrenees, I paid extra for some chill so that they can groom ALL of him, he loses interest as things progress

It’s been so hard to get back to taking care of myself. At this point I have to acknowledge I’ve been letting a lot slide. Due to being overwhelmed, not prioritizing my wellness, some depression with the general state of things, as well as a lot of personal shit with my folks the last several years, any and all of the above.

I’ve been off work since last Friday, for last week of school for the kids and coverage until the day summer camp to kick in. We were supposed to leave for the firefly vacation, which had to be delayed as dad had urgent surgery. He had just gotten out of the C collar, and this was a set back, however he came through well.

Getting that sorted, then a late trek out of town with the kids, J’s promotion ceremony to middle school, C needing to travel for work - which is rare, we both traveled this year and haven’t for a long time - also my close friends brother passed unexpectedly, I committed to hosting a retirement party this weekend and the studios 4th ‘birthday’ celebration. It’s Thursday of the following week and I am just now taking a breath.

I think the lapse of self care has really been a side effect of a hectic life. The thing is, it’s always going to be something. I sent emails on the websites for dentist and pcp, and the dentist called back to confirm, waiting on the clinic, it made things so easy.

Today while J mowed the back yard, I cleaned the back porch off. We also have our camping gear out as it was rainy and things needed to be cleaned/dried before storage and I was able to get the sleeping systems put away, the canopy for dining and additional table/chairs stored, the tent has to have some repairs, so it’s cleaned, just pitched until the specialty tape gets here for the seam. I’ve been framing art from the school year and also took some leaves out of our dinning room table for a change.

The cleaning and organizing and appointment making has made me feel settled for the first time in months really. It’s been nonstop.

Blah blah life stuff blah blah. Here’s some pics -

The last pic is trying to capture the lightening bugs - they peaked this year later than expected due to weather. It was a really cool experience and we plan to try for the lottery again to the Smokies this next year. It was impossible to photograph and I snapped a couple photos, then just experienced it.

Here are some of my favorites. It’s definitely one of my top favorite states. I love the terrain and how it can change within hours. I love how small I feel out there, well even smaller than I actually am. ;)

So why’d you go …

You said my heart has changed and my soul has changed

And my heart, and my heart

That my life has changed, that this town had changed