#opposite action

Similarly, the actions you choose when you need to cope with something, conditions your reflexes and helps you exercise your self control. It's why practicing those silly things from therapy and DBT is so important, even if they feel stupid.

It's very important to choose healthy coping methods. "Opposite action" is one I use a lot.

For casual joking as a coping mechanism, choose positive things instead of negative. Instead of "haha i should just kms", say "haha I'm the best at this." Say it even though it's cringe. Say it even if you don't genuinely believe you're good. Even though your world is falling apart and you're crying for help.

If you're always self-loathing, give yourself some gentleness. Instead of saying "I'm just awful," say "I'm struggling." Say it quietly. Say it shakily. Say it with hesitation. Say it with the ache in your chest that you desperately want someone to see your true pain.

Instead of choosing a punching bag or screaming into a pillow, choose deliberate gentleness, quiet speaking, silence, and breathing. Do it shaking. Do it with your whole body tense and your teeth clenched and your breathing ragged. Do it even though you want that cathartic release.

During a depressive episode, where you want to shut away and never move... Push yourself to sit up. Slide to the edge of your bed. Put your feet on the floor. Stand up. One tiny little thing at a time.

Opposite Action is a DBT coping technique. When you have the impulse to do something bad or negative...choose the opposite. Because oftentime, your default choice is to give in to learned, "safe" behaviors. The only way out is to learn healthy behaviors, and practice the shit out of them.

vvvvv My own personal struggle (cw: violence and anger) vvvvv

Opposite Action — Olive Klug

for all-or-nothing behavior, the opposite action is finding the middle ground

want to avoid the problem or pull an all nighter to address it? start the work and set it up for future you to have an easier time, and get some sleep

i find a similar thing works for “shoulds”. The opposite of should is action:

i should do laundry -> i want to do laundry (or have it done with) so I’ll do the first step of this action (getting up/gathering dirty clothes/setting a timer/sitting in the laundry room/insert action)

i should be studying -> i am resting (or set a timer til time to study/plan a meeting time for study group/open the study materials/set a five minute timer and see what you can learn in that time/text a friend what you’re learning about in class and explain it to them)

just because you WANT to do something

and that you CAN do something

opposite action time anon

our instinct when were upset is to punish and hurt ourselves more, isolate and push everyone away so were even more lonely, because were conditioned through abuse to think that that's what's we deserve. our instincts want us to be miserable

Ugh yes 🤦🏻‍♀️ 🙋🏻‍♀️😩