#online forums

Chapter one of my latest PIDW Forum fic has been posted!

Status: Online

Rating: T

Chapters: 1/? - Active WIP

Tags:

Relationship: Luo Binghe/Shen Yuan | Shen Qingqiu (In Future Chapters)

Characters: Shen Yuan | Shen Qingqiu, System (Scum Villain), Various Forum Members, Xiang Fei | Shang Qinghua

Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Social Media, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Pre-Canon, Post-Canon, Online Forums, forum posting, Social Media AU, Crack, Other Additional Tags to Be Added

Summary:

For anyone unaware, I’m talking about the new Wife Quiz by new user TongTongLikesHEs I tried it out last night, thinking it would be just like any other wife quiz. I usually get Guo Lingli (intro chapter 342) which I don’t have much complaint about. She’s a cool wife, and her arc with Sha Hualing is really fun. I figured I’d get her again with this one, she’s one of the few constants in the quizzes along with the main wives. This test was really weird, though, nothing like the others in the community. The questions were borderline insane and really hyper-specific. I ended up getting “Background Wife #241”????? Why is that even an option?!? It’s not my fault I couldn’t remember how to soothe a Qi Deviation in Heavenly Demons caused by the life energy overload of a Three-horned Stripeless Tiger!!! OTL

Or

Maybe I Am Maturing

I can totally be a jerk online.

I’m not a perfect person. I can get riled over stupid petty things. And I can be stupid and petty, I will never deny that. But I do try to check myself on occasion.

One rule I have always had is that if I am posting on a tv show forum, I’m not going to be that asshole that needs to dominate every forum for the show, and who insists their view be acknowledged…

Jean says:

When it comes to things like tags and forums, there’s often a group of people who see themselves as “owning” the space. They might have particular standards that they expect people to meet in order to “own” the space along with them. Things like:

- belonging to a certain demographic

- sharing a specific difficulty

- having certain political beliefs

- liking the thing that the space is dedicated to celebrating

- knowing social skills that may be specific to the space. Like knowing how to use trigger warnings in a particular way, or interacting comfortably with a certain type of humor

This is tricky. It’s rare that everyone who “owns” a space agrees about exactly who owns it or what the etiquette is.

If one person seems to speak for all the inhabitants of a space, it’s hard to know who they really speak for, and who they don’t speak for. It’s extra hard when you really dislike what they’re saying.

Not knowing who speaks for whom can make hurtful actions feel like they come from a whole group instead of one, or two, or twenty people.

Just because one person is acting badly, it doesn’t mean the whole group would act the same way. It’s possible that the people you encounter are acting extra mean, or aren’t informing you correctly about what the space is for.

Here’s where it gets a little harder: It’s possible that someone you encounter is acting extra mean, and that they’re still correct about what the space is for. They may be trying to protect something everyone values about the space, but be protecting it in an overly aggressive way.

In that situation, you could lash out at one person, only to find that others get caught in the crossfire.

What feels like an equal and opposite reaction doesn’t have an equal impact when an individual and a group argue. Words get separated from their context. People lose track of distinctions quickly as they unconsciously alternate between thinking about what the group believes and thinking about what one group member believes.

And in the middle of all that, online groups tend to have a trickle of new visitors coming in, trying to figure out what’s expected of them.

This is messy and hard. Prepare for people to act poorly from a place of hurt and confusion sometimes. Try not to take it out on innocent bystanders when you’re hurt and confused.