"I get a 30 per cent discount on gloves, I can text faster than you can, I leave less fingerprints at the crime scene, and I can get away with flipping people the bird when they piss me off. I just walk away laughing my ass off while they rack their brains trying to figure out whether it was my middle finger or not!"
"And besides, isn't seven the luckiest number? Seven wonders of the world, seven days in the week, seven colours in the rainbow, seven heavens? Plus I'm of Greek ancestry, and seven was the number of completion and wholeness in our old mythologies, so that just means my hands are perfect. I feel so lucky and blessed to have the best hands in the world."