#okay seriously

Huh this sounds....

He tells you he loves you pretty much everyday but—it never feels like it. Only feels like rushed kisses and hurried phone calls, like frustrated sighs at the same conversations, like becoming comfortable in a space where nothing is really wrong but it’s not right, either.

You tell him you want kids and marriage and you only ever get the same response: “at a later time, baby, the timing isn’t right, baby, maybe in the next couple years, baby.” Tells you that he does want mini you’s running around with his green eyes, but he wants to be able to cherish their developing stages. Says he can’t focus on kids when he has to focus on all of Japan. Tells you that he’ll marry you when the time is right, but it’s never right in his mind, no. Nothing will ever go right marrying the number one; it’ll only put a bigger target on your back, and you don’t want that, right?

Loving him feels like…like a slow death. Feels like onslaught sickness that doesn’t set in until it’s rigorous and life altering, until you can’t get out of bed because your legs are too heavy, until your last breath is whispered to the one who helps carry your biggest regrets.

Loving Number One Hero Deku is a slow death. Loving him is hard when it feels like he doesn’t love himself, doesn’t love his small family of you and one of the stray cats he found when he noticed you started pulling away from him. What is loving a hero that goes out and is on the brink of death every time he returns home? What is loving a hero that barely ever returns home? What is loving a hero that is willing to sacrifice his entirety to the cause of being a hero, but never to the cause of keeping you beside him?