#ocean.wav

me: "she/her works for us collectively as well"

roommate: "oh okay! good to know"

me: "it's the plural she/her"

roommate: "like an inverse royal we"

learn to question the apparent roles of each headmate

let roles evolve over time

take care of the needs of every headmate, including the ones who allegedly "don't have many needs"

these weren't lessons we learned independent of any outside influence. a day or so after we first came out, our girlfriend pointed out to em that she was always only ever concerned about what elise needs, and that she never seemed to pause her role as caretaker/stress manager to address or even consider on her own needs. that simple act completely transformed how we work as a system for the better.

learning that every single one of us needs attention and care has been vital, and honestly set em up to be a very good host when she was thrust into that role last fall.

a powerful plush piece for @plushiesknowbest !