#nyxene

@nyxtickled and I have missed you all while we’ve been away on our grief sabbatical. I know I can speak for both of us when I say that losing our baby was the most painful and brutalizing experience we’ve ever had. I don’t think either of us were prepared for the devastation it caused and we’ve spent the past two months doing our best to process and heal.

Unfortunately we’re both the type to hardcore isolate when our mental health is in the toilet, so we apologize for being MIA and not checking in with all the people we’ve made these beautiful connections with. Thank you so much for all the messages of concern you’ve sent Nyx and I, even if we weren’t able to respond just yet. It meant a lot to know that people were thinking of us and hoping we were well 😭

Another thing Nyx and I have in common is the complete and utter erasure of our sex drives and interest in kink when we’re depressed as fuck. But we’re both getting better a little bit more every day and have been wanting to get back into the community we love so much. And I genuinely just miss tickling the shit outta my wife and showing our friends, hehehe 🫢

we were both loving on Crusty last night and then my heart melted when i saw how pretty our rings looked together so i had to take a pic.

there is nothing more mind-melting than a beautiful sadistic femme with pointy acrylics 🫠 @exene666 <3

story time: a couple years ago i visited my mom back home and she was going thru some of her old boxes of things and i laid eyes on this insane ring that has literally every single quality of my fantasy ring (solitaire, round, flawless, heart and arrow cut, moissanite bc fuck diamonds, etc) and i was like what the FUCK is that mom??? and she was like lmao that was my ring from [second marriage] you don’t remember that? and i’m like no??? i mean i was like. 5-10 yrs old so i didn’t pay any mind back then. but i’m still like UHHHHH??? this is fucking GORGEOUS i can’t believe i never noticed it before omg omg this is everything i drool over when i look at rings !!!

so. she was like. “well i was going to leave it for you in my will but idk why i have to die before i can give you stuff so go ahead take it.” ????!!!??!??!?!

and funnier story: i was still engaged to my ex at the time, while dating my current wife as well (polyamory obvi). and my ex fiancée got pissed at me when she saw me wearing it and was like “uh where’s the ring i got for you” and i was like well it’s on my other hand right now but i just got excited.. and then she didn’t talk to me for like a day bc she said it was insulting to her lmao. i talked to exene after that and she was like “baby im not trying to speak ill of your partner but that’s a little ridiculous. i would be so excited to see you with your dream ring. the whole point is for you to have the ring you love the most. it’s not supposed to be about my ego.”

from that point i had to wear my moms ring on my right hand to keep my ex from being upset. until we broke up.

i immediately started wearing my moms ring on my left hand and decided i was engaged to myself. no more promising myself to anyone but me. mind you i was still dating exene, but neither of us even liked the institution of marriage. she was the one who encouraged me to keep it on my left hand and put myself first. we had no desire to get married, especially not after i’d finally set myself free from the daunting prospect of an unfulfilling lifetime with someone whose relationship with me felt like it was held together by sunk cost fallacy alone.

she’s a major cuddler so i tried laying down beside her on the floor just in case she maybe wanted to lay in bed with me but she couldn’t. she immediately rolled her little piggy body right into mine and little-spooned me as i proceeded to cry and snot into her neck fur for like half an hour.