#nwop

Or is he...?

Shins of Steel

Usually leave the huge reveals to the end but I can’t wait to talk about this major plot point, since it’s knocked a dent into my immovable “All Celestial Dragons Are Wet Lettuces” viewpoint. It’s like I smugly posted a “Change My Mind” meme and Doflamingo cracked his knuckles and proved me wrong.

Or did he?

After opening with Rebecca and Cavendish in the Colosseum (more on that later), the story veered back to Law, Doflamingo and Fujitora. I thought, “This is nice. Haven’t seen Law in a while. Let’s see what the rascal is up to.”

He was pretty much where Oda had left him: running like hell from a chuckling Doflamingo. And he was still reeling from Doflamingo’s deception.

“I have no interest in your past!” Law proclaimed. Which was totally unfair because I was definitely interested.  “The only people who can use the World Government to deceive us are Celestial Dragons!”

“So what?” Doflamingo answered.

At this point I figured Doflamingo somehow had them in his pocket. That Doflamingo was so wealthy and well-connected he could even manipulate them.

There was a flurry of attacks. Doflamingo pulled a Sasuke vs Orochimaru in the chuunin exams: wired up Law and pinned him to a tree. He was like, “You can’t buy any more time, Law.”

“You said it’s complicated before,” Law said, (buying time). What do you mean?”

But Doflamingo is not so easily led into talking.

“If you wanna chat, hand over Caesar and his heart first.”

“Caesar... no, those SMILEs are that important to you? I guess they are,” Law laughed. “Without the SMILEs, Kaidou’s gonna kill you and it’s all over for you.”

A different sort of attempt at buying time, as Law’s shit-talking made Doflamingo lose his temper and attack. Law shambled his way out of the literal bind but Doflamingo was too quick. It was lucky Fujitora was there because Doflamingo was ready to kill and loot for Caesar’s heart.

Boom went the gravity. Law was pinned to the ground beneath crushing force. (I think I’ve said this before but Fujitora’s power is... it’s just great.)

Doflamingo was like, “Wtf, Fujitora? I almost had him, you party pooper!”

Fujitora, who has played this entire situation suspiciously by-the-book, just said, “Gotta stop you right there, Heavenly Yaksha. I am here to arrest, not execute. Soz.”

Doflamingo had a quiet seethe to himself, then said, “FINE! But I need Caesar’s heart back.” Once Doflamingo stringed the heart into his hands, he cheered up a bit. The odds seemingly in his favour, he was more willing to talk. “By the way, you seem quite curious about that complication I mentioned. You wanna hear about it?”

At this point, I was thinking, “Law, if you do not say yes, I will start flipping tables.”

Luckily, Doflamingo was now in a talkative mood.

“A long time ago - it goes back eight-hundred years, Law - twenty kings from twenty countries came together at the centre of the world and formed one giant organisation. The World Government. The kings who created it decided to move to Mariejois and live there with their families. The Nefertari family of Alabasta refused, so there were nineteen, to be exact. The descendants of those creators who still live there and reign over the world are known as the Celestial Dragons. It means, however, that those nineteen countries lost their royal families eight-hundred years ago. In those countries, they elected new kings out of necessity and new royal families arose. In the case of my country, Dressrosa, the new royalty was the Riku Family. And the old family who moved to Mariejois as the creators of the world was the Donquixote family.”

THE DONQUIXOTE FAMILY.

“But, but, but....” I thought. “Weren’t all Celestial Dragons useless, dangerous spoiled brats like St Charloss and What’s-His-Face who washed up on Fishman Island?” Doflamingo is hyper-competent. How could this be?? Muh prejudices!

I guess that explained the Heavenly Yaksha nickname. Heavenly is similar to celestial, right? I suppose Vergo’s warning to Law, re. lack of knowledge on Doflamingo’s past also makes sense now. Law was technically pitting himself against a Celestial Dragon who can pull World Government-level strings. 

Not only that, but it seems the situation really is complicated.

Because Doflamingo had a bit more to say.

“So you’re called a Celestial Dragon, Doflamingo!” Law raged.

“I was. But not anymore. What is bloodline? What is destiny? I don’t think there are many people who have lived such a chequered life as mine. I wish I could tell the story of my life before I met you, over drinks. But I don’t have time for that. I’ve got to do something about the Strawhats in Dressrosa. I know there are quite a few people who underestimated them and got hurt.”

THANK YOU, ODA!

The plot gods have answered my plea. But these answers have raised only more questions.

1. Doflamingo used to be a Celestial Dragon. Not anymore. What happened? Did he abandon the rank willingly or was it taken from him? The whole “What is bloodline? What is destiny?” stuff is highly suspicious. Makes me think Doflamingo is not a fan of the Celestial Dragons.

2. The Riku Family. They were the ones who took over. They were elected fair and square. Everything seemed to be fine. Until Doflamingo came back to claim the territory his family abandoned eight-hundred years ago. Why return to Dressrosa? The answer to this question is probably tied up with point one.

3. The Nefertari were Originals. Even back then, the future Celestials must have been total moonfruits because the Nefertaris were like, “Ehhhh, nah, you guys go and have a good time on your island.” Imagine being stuck with those losers for eight-hundred years? No thanks.

4. Not underestimating the Strawhats. Doflamingo is smart. He has seen these new whippersnapper pirates topple too many Big Names and institutions to ignore the threat they pose to his territory. I actually cheered when he said this. A villain who can lay aside ego for the sake of the task at hand. I suppose Doflamingo does have the benefit of hindsight. Crocodile never had that luxury.

After that, there was a funny scene with Caesar and a heart-swap (Law still has his heart! Those heat-seeking Karma missiles are locked on Caesar. (LOCK ONNNNN!)) Fujitora also heard a KABOOM of thunder from the direction of the sea, even though the weather was perfectly calm. Law knew that would be Nami. The Strawhats were heading his way.

This was not a good thing.

Amid the chaos, Law made a desperate bid for freedom. Doflamingo pursued. He tried to lure him away but unfortunately, Doflamingo is smart.

Which leads us nicely to...

Debatable, But Okay...

(Side note: I loved how Toei segued seamlessly from Doflamingo’s sinister villain reveal laughter to Brook’s cheerful deceit laughter in 653. Did me a big lol there.)

And at first it seemed like Brook had found a new pal on Sunny. Not only that... he had betrayed the Strawhats? Surely not?

Had Soul King placed his art above his solid gold friendships with Nami and Chopper? Why was he hanging with Giolla? This was an outrage!

Giolla wanted to surprise Law (and gain Donquixote points) by picking up Caesar in Sunny instead of the Strawhats. Oh, what an excellent day it had turned out to be. Her latest art transformation depicted the tragedy of Dressrosa so perfectly! And it would only take ten more minutes for Nami, Chopper and Momonosuke to become part of her art and suffocate.

Like a total rookie, she babbled her plan to Brook, who smiled (if he could smile) and nodded and played the perfect gentleman. In the background, the others wailed and lamented Brook deserting them for art.

“May I play a song to celebrate?” he asked.

“Of course!”

“Then could you turn my violin and bow back to normal, please?”

Oh, Brook, you absolute legend. As soon as Giolla made that fatal error, Brook said, “You see this violin? There’s a cane sword inside. I already cut you.”

Suddenly, Brook was the hero! (Brook is always the hero.) Imagine doubting him, Nami and Chopper, you silly sausages!

There was a bit I didn’t like much that followed when they bickered over who would cuff Giolla. Nami demanded that Brook or Chopper did it, which was ridiculous because they are Devil Fruit eaters. If they touched those cuffs, their strength would sap and Giolla could overpower them. Nami, you should have done it. Doesn’t matter if you think you’re a coward or you view yourself as weak, you should have taken one for the team there. Not cool.

They spent so much time bickering, Giolla woke up and they missed the opportunity to restrain her. They were forced into fighting. Which was actually kind of good, in the end. Nami, Chopper and Brook used their heads to outsmart Giolla’s Giant Picasso Form and fire a Gaon Cannon bolt. Then Momonosuke shanked her from behind when she was down. Nami finished her off with a thunderbolt.

Teamwork, amirite?

Unfortunately, Fujitora heard the thunderbolt and told Doflamingo. So when they sailed round to Green Bit to collect Law and Caesar, Chopper saw the horrendous sight of Doflamingo approaching at speed through his binoculars.

I hope he recovers soon.

Who Says Zoro Can’t Compromise?

Once again, the Strawhats have split up. Usopp and Robin have reunited with Franky at the King Riku Army HQ beneath Flower Field. Zoro originally left with Wicka to check in on Sunny and rescue the others from Giolla, but met Sanji and Foxfire on the way.

Wick was like, “Who dat?”

In keeping with the Legendary Heroes names, Zoro introduced Sanji and Foxfire as Spiral-Brows-land and Topknot-Land (lmao)

Zoro updated Sanji on the dire situation on Sunny. Of course, Sanji was intent on rescuing Nami and the others, so Zoro stayed behind with Foxfire to find Luffy.

Then Violet appeared like a ninja from the shadows to tell him Giolla had hijacked Sunny. How did she know this?

Turns out she has a Very Useful Power.

Clairvoyance. It usually means seeing into the future, but it can also mean gaining information about a person, including their location, through extra-sensory perception. Nice. For Violet, this means she can see things within a 4000km radius, top-down, as a bird would. She is a walking surveillance satellite and can see everything going on in Dressrosa. She guided Sanji to Sunny and updated him on what was going on in Sunny. 

Like I said, a Very Useful Power.

But, since it is a Very Useful Power, the Donquixote Crew are not pleased that she’s betrayed them. Back at the palace, a new character called Gladius is Very Upset. Since he despises and wishes death upon people who cannot follow plans and are not punctual, I’m guessing Violet has used up her two strikes already and is dead to this hilarious weirdo. 

(Why does his hair explode?)

Violet eventually picked up Sunny and informed Sanji the dreadfully bad news that Sunny had been struck by lightning. She was puzzled when Sanji did not react as expected. Instead, he boosted with fury to the ship, where, I expect, he was surprised to find Doflamingo doing the exact same thing.

“Watch this, Law!” Doflamingo laughed. “I will viciously slay your allies right before your eyes!”

Doflamingo sure knows how to turn the thumb screws and punish people, doesn’t he?

But Sanji was like, “NOT TODAY, SATAN!”

He smashed shins with Doflamingo.

And I cheered.

Sanji, you have just gained all your cool points back. I forgive you for being distracted by Violet.

(Oh, and I almost forgot to mention that Bartolomeo recognised Zoro and totally splooshed on sight.)

Rebecca and Cavendish: You Beautiful Legends!

Now Doflamingo has spilled some of the beans on his past, his treatment of Rebecca is odd. If he wanted to get rid of the Riku Family, he could have easily killed her years ago. It’s almost like he wants to drag their memory and reputation thoroughly through the mud. If it’s a propaganda campaign, it makes sense. Keep the people blind to what’s been going on by dangling the scapegoat in front of them. But this is a cruel and unusual punishment. It’s almost like he actually *hates* the Riku family. Or am I reading way too much into this?

In the first scene of 652, Rebecca walked out into the ring. The way Oda had the crowd behave - reduced to shadows, red-eyed, shrieking, inhumane shapes - might be a dig at the sorts of people who love blood sports. Animals and humans risking their lives to entertain uncaring humans and prop up gambling industries.

The insults they hurled at Rebecca were harsh. “Drop dead, Rebecca!” “Foul blooded!” “Today’s your execution day!” “The shame of Dressrosa!” And the worst one, for some reason, “Set her on fire! That’ll make her pyro grandfather happy.”

Ooft. 

Well, it was pretty disgusting, and I wasn’t the only one who thought so.

Enter Cavendish on his Farul, his white horse.

Ohhhhhh, he was not happy. Not happy at all. He heaped abuse on the crowd and called out their rank hypocrisy.

“ENOUGH! I don’t care why you hate her so much but she’s a young woman who stands in the ring putting her life on the line. You guys are not risking yoru lives so you have no right to jeer at her. If you really want to kill her, take a weapon and come down to the ring yourself! The voices of people who have no guts are nothing but irritating noise! I have my reasons for entering this competition, but even so, I cannot stomach it. The lives and deaths of warriors are not a show!”

Well, Cabbage just earned himself some major cool points there. I was like, “YOU TELL ‘EM, CABBAGE! NO MERCY!”

Even Luffy agreed. “Oh, Cabbage spoke up and said the right thing. I’m impressed!”

Well.. sort of. 

“Still don’t like him, though.” (Lmao, Luffy.)

Cavendish’s impromptu speech had an interesting effect on the crowd. They still hate Rebecca but instead of focusing their abuse on her, they decided they would use all that energy to support Cavendish, instead. 

It’s a win-win situation. Rebecca can kick-ass in peace and Cavendish, well, since the crowd started chanting his name, he had a tear-filled, “YOU LOVE ME! YOU REALLY LOVE ME!” moment. 

He’s already contemplating his media strategy.

Classic Cavendish.

When Doflamingo’s here, and you feel the end is near. 

So Bartolomeo is basically Hinata.

He collects Strawhat posters.

He is their biggest fan.

You guys were right.

This is hilarious.

I love him. xD

“I SENT YOU MY BLOOD, LUFFY!”

Once Luffy and Don Chinjao left the ring, the clean up and reconstruction team moved in. As of now, three contenders could potentially move forward to challenge Diamante: Jesus Burgess, Bartolomeo and the Not-So-Mysterious Lucy. 

I say “not so mysterious” because everyone and their gran fighting in the next round knows who he is now.

And I have a theory: Bartolomeo, Rebecca and Luffy will team up against Burgess in the next round.

Why do I think this?

Well, once Luffy left the ring, pursued by Cavendish, two fodders happened to pass by Bartolomeo. He overheard them talking shit about Luffy.

“Why does Cavendish keep yelling Strawhat? As if he’d be here. That’s the guy who couldn’t even save his brother’s life. Anyone could do what he did if he doesn’t have to save anyone’s life!”

For some reason, Bartolomeo Did Not Like This. He pinned the fodder and almost crushed him with a barrier. At first I thought Bartolomeo’s reaction was something to do with Ace. Maybe they were friends once?

Nope.

The real reason was Even Better.

“What was that joke you made so lightly?” Bartolomeo growled. “Listen, Luffy-senpai will become the standard bearer for this era. He will become the Pirate King!”

No, I thought. No way. Bartolomeo was a Luffy supporter? How? And why Luffy-senpai? Had Luffy unknowingly taught him along the way?

The answer? Sort of.

Bartolomeo was there at Loguetown.

“I saw it with my own eyes. Over two years ago. At Loguetown in East Blue. On the legendary scaffold where Roger died, Luffy-senpai shouted it out then. At that moment, straight from heaven, came a bolt of thunder which saved his life. What I saw was a miracle!”

And thus Luffy’s Biggest Fan was born.

Seriously, this guy used to be a gangland boss (had taken over about one-hundred and fifty towns). But he began to follow the news stories. Alabasta, Enies Lobby, Impel Down and Marineford. He made a fan shrine with his bounty poster collection! In the end, Bart’s hardcore fanboy status reached the lofty height of emulation. Inspired by Luffy, he sailed out to sea.

And it turns out Bart does not take kindly to anyone talking shit about his idol.

While Luffy dodged Cavendish, Bartolomeo peeked round the wall and watched. “I can’t approach him. When it comes to it, I can’t do it. I’m too nervous to go anywhere near him. The scar under his left eye. It’s real! He’s so cool! Oh... my eyes are suddenly blind with tears. That stupid Cabbage shit. I want to beat him to death and save Luffy!”

It’s nice to know Luffy has such a dedicated in-universe fanbase.

And Don Chinjao can be added to the club too. He joined Cavendish in thundering after Luffy because he wants to place his grandson’s Happo Navy under the command of Garp’s Illustrious Grandson. What a result, right?

Except Luffy was thoroughly weirded out, wondering why these three crazy guys were chasing him.

Luckily for him, Rebecca was around.

Teach Takes Another Level in Scumbag

She grabbed his arm and hauled him off. There was a more private place nearby where no one else went.

On the way, they passed Jesus Burgess. He was in the middle of a DDM call. A very familiar voice was on the line. So familiar, it caused a visceral reaction in Luffy. He screeched to a halt immediately.

It was Blackbeard. And they were having a weird conversation.

“By that logic, Shiryu is no different,” Teach said.

“But I can’t trust Aokiji!” Burgess complained. “Uh... Hold on a sec, Captain. Strawhat is here.”

This piqued Teach’s interest. “Eh? You there, Strawhat?”

“You’re Blackbeard, aren’t you?” (You know when Luffy remembers you straight away that you must either be A) Really Good, or B) A Real Asshole.

“Yeah, it’s been awhile. Heard you’re fighting in the competition, Lucy. But my man, Burgess, is gonna win the Mera-Mera Fruit. I can’t wait because it’ll be like having Ace in my crew. He turned me down in the past.”

OOOOFT.

Wow, that one was a low blow. To be honest, I really like how Oda employs Teach as a long-term adversary to Luffy. Teach’s panel/screen time is economical but every time he appears, Oda really ramps up the enmity between him and Luffy. No exchange is ever wasted.

I was pretty proud of Luffy for keeping his cool here. It shows how much he’s matured as a person and as a Captain.

I am also intrigued by why Burgess is worrying about Aokiji? That was pretty random. Is our favourite ex-Admiral really operating in the underworld now? Is he trying to wangle information from the Blackbeards? Hmm... Don’t think Smoker would like that. Then again, he has had a hard lesson on Punk Hazard. Maybe he will be a little more cynical in future and won’t dismiss intel from pirates out of hand.

Justice for Toys!

Post Blackbeard Encounter, Rebecca led Luffy further away from the chaos. On the way, Luffy was distracted by free food samples. Just before he cleaned out the stall, Rebecca offered to buy him lunch, even though she didn’t have much money.

What a nice gesture, right?

Rebecca found a deserted looking area and Luffy smashed into his bento like it was Blackbeard’s face. Through mouthfuls of food, Luffy asked where they were. Rebecca explained it was quarters for the gladiators. They called it “a prison” (which, we learned later, it literally was).

Since Luffy’s life revolves around piracy and food, he asked Rebecca if she was hungry and if she wanted some food.

This triggered an Obvious Trauma Flashback. Smol Rebecca and her mother beneath the tree in Flower Field. Smol Rebecca saying, “I’m hungry.” Her mother replying, “Okay, do you think you can stay here alone for a while?” Then suddenly... dead mother.

Rebecca said tightly, “I don’t get hungry.”

Although I figured there was guilt here, I didn’t link Smol Rebecca’s food request directly with her mother’s death. Not until the big reveal of Rebecca’s past.

That unwitting conversational misstep must have pushed Rebecca into enacting her plan. She had intended to lure Luffy into a quiet area and kill him. When she turned on him, to my surprise, some randoms in bandages piped up from behind bars. “YEAH, GIT HIM, REBECCA!”

But Rebecca had picked on the wrong competitor.

Or, when you look at it from another angle, exactly the right one.

Luffy was able to fend her off while still tucking into his delicious meal. It was an embarrassingly easy win. The gulf of ability between them was so wide, she was never on Luffy’s radar. Right now, beating Rebecca would be like swatting a fly. (Not disparaging her general fighting ability, but compared to Luffy, most people would come off worse.) She was no threat, therefore Luffy wasn’t angry about the assassination attempt.

Luckily, she bought Luffy lunch. Especially since she didn’t have much money. He loves food and would appreciate that. Any other offence would pale in comparison to that act of generosity.

“I’m not gonna do anything to someone who bought me food,” Luffy said when Rebecca insisted he just kill her and get it over with.

Then Luffy noticed the “mummies” - the prisoners in bandages in the background. Rebecca explained the situation. She and the other guys in the room are “convict gladiators”, pretty much like the system in ancient Rome where slaves and criminals could be slung into the arena and ordered to fight to the death.

To ramp up Doflamingo’s evilness, they also said, “The king says we can be released if we win a thousand times. Everyone who tried to escape got shot. There’s nowhere to run for us. Before Doflamingo became king, gladiatorial matches were not to the death. In this kingdom, there are very bright and very dark sides.”

So Doflamingo brought in the Delayed Death Penalty for criminals. I guess it’s a way of ushering capital punishment through the back door. Entertain the masses and get rid of undesirables in one go. Few will object because most love the Colosseum games. The ones who won’t fight, or the really dangerous ones likely to talk too much, are turned into toys. That’s iron control of Dressrosa right there.

And Rebecca is not a fan.

“Today an army led by Sol will come to let us out by provoking a battle against Doflamingo. He is willing to sacrifice his life to destroy the kingdom. But I’m gonna do it before he does. I don’t want to just be protected anymore. I want to protect Sol this time! I’ll win today’s competition no matter what and will kill Doflamingo with the Mera-Mera Fruit power.”

I thought I’d figured out Rebecca’s motive to fight. Poor kid with no food, no family, maybe resorted to petty criminal activity, was arrested and now she wants to escape. Amongst all the crap that happened to her, maybe Sol was her only friend.

Luffy was like, “Why are you worried a toy is gonna die?”

Rebecca just smiled and said, “You’re not from here, so it’ll be hard for you to understand. Toys are the same as humans (wait til she finds out they *are* humans. She’s gonna flip tables). They are friends to the friendless. Siblings for those who have none. Lovers for the loveless. I don’t understand why they’re not able to live with us. Since I lost my mother, Sol-san raised me. He’s like a father to me (I bet he is).”

Luffy actually listened to this (which is a huge accomplishment, Rebecca. You should be proud of that) and said, “You don’t look like a prisoner to me. Buy me lunch again sometime!”

Rebecca walked out to the ring and said, “See you at the finals.”

I like her confidence.

Then a flashback kicked in that showed me how wrong I was about Rebecca’s motivations.

Oda Really Likes Princesses, Doesn’t He?

The sad tale of how Sol came to raise Rebecca opened with a scene of Smol Rebecca and her mother living quietly on Flower Field, picking flowers to sell in town. They had a lovely house. An idyllic life. But don’t think I missed that one empty chair at the table. (Sol is totally her dad.)

Then there was fire. The King Riku army was setting town on fire. This really puzzled me. (I’m still not one-hundred percent on this. Are we talking the actual King Riku or the Resistance King Riku Army here?)

Soldiers chased Smol Rebecca and her mother, Lady Scarlet. Diamante headed the charge. Sol stepped in and defended them. After the battle, Smol Rebecca and Lady Scarlet hid out in Flower Field. Rebecca said she was hungry. Lady Scarlet knew it was a risk but she sneaked into town to buy food. She was shot and killed. Sol brought her body back, along with the food she’d died to buy Rebecca.

Smol Rebecca nudging her mother’s dead body and telling her to get up was like post-stampede Mufasa and Simba all over again. It was Very Sad. ;_;

She almost cried but Sol clamped his hand over her mouth. Enemies were still looking for her.

“Your mother was high-born. Do you know we have a new king now? The new king wants to capture all the former nobility. He even wants to capture you because your mother’s blood runs through your veins. I’m gonna protect you unti the end with my life. Until the day you are filled with happiness, I will always be by your side.”

Wait... I thought. Rebecca is a noble???

What the hell?

What was going on?

Was the battle the night before a civil war in Dressrosa? One that Doflamingo won against King Riku?

Who Says Politicians Never Keep Their Promises, Eh?

Because here he is. On a podium. A shiny new king wearing his all time fave feather jacket. The adoring crowd chanted his name. “Doflamingo! Doflamingo!”

He made a speech. Par for the course with new kings.

“The Riku Family has been running this poor country for centuries! In the end they became shameless and robbed money and goods from citizens for themselves. I’m gonna make this country wealthy, instead!”

This is where I lost track of the situation. From what has been revealed about people turning into Toys, I thought Doflamingo “brought someone in” to do that. I figured that would have been *after* he gained power. But Toys were around before that. Sol is proof.

What gives? 

And the people of Dressrosa *really* hate King Riku and anyone associated with his bad, corrupt family. Unfortunately for Rebecca, not only is she a noble, she is also King Riku’s granddaughter. Her status is also well-known in the Colosseum. When she walked into the ring, the commentator introduced her as the Phantom Princess of King Riku’s line. She was booed and vilified by the audience. “BURN IN HELL! CORRUPT FAMILY!”

I get the feeling Doflamingo engineered this somehow. It’s all too perfect a narrative. Doflamingo, the saviour, sweeps in and saves Dressrosa from the evil, corrupt family, while he is as bad, if not worse. Or maybe Doflamingo did have good intentions, but, as always in life, matters snowballed and he became hella corrupt himself. Leaning more towards deliberate coup at the moment.

I am also highly suspicious of the gladiator Ricky. It’s very close to Riku and there was definitely an older gent under that mask...

The fight between Luffy and Don Chinjao is finally over! I think after what happened, Luffy might have found a new friend. Law also made a stressful phone call to The Krusty Krab Sunny and ordered delivery of one ship to Green Bit.

Zoro and Franky have teamed up with Sol at Resistance HQ in Flower Field, and if Usopp keeps perpetuating his fantastic bullshit, the entire Strawhat crew will be elevated to God status in the Tontatta tribe.

Slightly worried about Law and the Strawhats stuck on Sunny but I’m seventy percent certain they will pull through and won’t be captured by any Donquixote family affiliates. (The thirty percent left over remains a huge, nagging doubt.)

Luffy’s Tough Love Fight Therapy

The Colosseum showdown between Luffy and Don Chinjao picked up at the start of episode 649.

The action was fast and furious. Luffy pulled out all his quick moves: jet pistol, jet gatling, jet stamp gatling. All defended against by Chinjao. The crowd went wild. It was one of the greatest matches the Colosseum had ever seen! Some cheered for Lucy. Others cheered for Chinjao. The atmosphere was electric.

“You’re quite a fighter,” Don Chinjao said.

“Yeah, you’re strong too, as I thought,” Luffy answered. You know. Being honest as he is.

Don Chinjao totally overreacted. “WHAT U SAY? STRONG? U TRYIN TO INSULT MEH??”

Luffy was, quite rightly, bewildered. “Wtf, all I said was that you’re strong?”

Apparently, this was a grave insult to Don Chinjao. A huge kick in the ego. Chinjao had been much stronger before.

“I’m no better than a wolf without its fangs now. A skin-headed man without his drill. A brat like you can’t understand how miserable I feel living my life like this. I’m frustrated, disappointed and sad. But you can never understand.”

I laughed when Luffy yelled, “How can I understand? You keep messing with me without explaining anything!” (He’s just saying what we were all thinking, right?)

“You really want to know why I’ve become like this?”

“No, I’m not that interested.” (Lmao! We meet again, harsh Luffy.)

“Well, I’ll tell you before you die, since you insist.” 

Don Chinjao is one of those old dudes that is TELLING you that long and rambling story even though you have showed zero interest and have been glancing at your watch for the past half hour.

Suddenly, Luffy the Fight Therapist was unwilling and open for business.

According to Chinjao, Garp punched his head in thirty years ago. Literally. As in Don Chinjao once looked like Dan Akroyd from 90s sci-fi comedy, Coneheads. 

That was until his resplendent, pointy napper met Garp’s fist.

The whole flashback was hilariously weird. Turns out Chinjao’s drill-like bonce was the only means to access his remote family treasure vault under an ice sheet. Once Garp took away the key, Chinjao fell into a deep depression. Heartbroken, he retired from piracy, a lifeless shell, just idling away time.

That was kind of sad. I felt for Chinjao then. He’s like the model of the old, proud working man who suffers a physical injury, can no longer work and slips into anger and depression. Since Chinjao knows and values nothing but strength, wealth and power, he cannot and will not see another way forward. Unlike Luffy, Don Chinjao got his ass beat and never found the strength to crawl out of the gutter and retrain.

Instead, he decided to lay the blame for his misfortune squarely at Luffy’s feet.

Luffy, naturally, was outraged. “Wtf are you talking about? Grandpa and I are different people. Look, mate. I’m busy. I’m gonna win Ace’s fruit at any cost and become the Pirate King. I have no time to be your therapist.”

Then Chinjao made two Big Mistakes.

Wow, Chinjao has Really Specific Taste

Mistake #1?

Chinjao laughed off Luffy’s chances at becoming Pirate King. The reason was typical crotchety old man talk: “the media lionised you worst generation squirts and it emboldened you. But none of you are strong enough to sail across the sea *we* fought on. After Whitebeard’s death, I ain’t expecting much. The only guy who looks good is Blackbeard Teach.”

At the mere mention of Teach, Luffy’s eyes became two circles.

“If I had to pick one, it’s him. But anyway, if you’re only good enough to compete against me, just give up!”

Oh, Chinjao, I thought. Ohhhhhhhh, you just goofed. You goofed big time. You do not mention Teach in a positive light within Luffy’s earshot. You just do not. Teach was the asshole who captured Ace and handed him to the Marines. He shares Public Enemy Number One status with Akainu. Tell Luffy you believe Teach will become Pirate King and your fate is sealed.

Mistake #2?

Chinjao’s fighting style is kinda lame. People who spin during fights in shounen anime are always fodder (the one that sticks out is that spinning top guy in the HxH Heaven’s Arena arc.) This was not his mistake. It’s just a side thought.

The Teach comment pushed Luffy’s buttons. But what Chinjao said next was even worse.

“You’re not too bad but if a guy like Rayleigh chose a brat at this level as the flag bearer for this generation, he’s not as smart as he used to be. The Marines were smart when they squelched the most evil one of the lot: Ace. That man had demon’s blood in his veins. Do you think you can beat the Marine admirals, the Yonkou and surpass Roger? That’s impossible!”

Demon’s blood? Most evil one of the lot?

*cue Kill Bill red-mist music*

“Stop whining over one punch!” Luffy yelled, as he wound up a Thor Elephant Gun attack. “I can’t count how many times I got punched by Grandpa!”

When the attack connected and that spike popped back out of Chinjao’s head, I laughed like a drain. Luffy hit Chinjao so hard, he turned the clock back thirty years.

I’m sure Chinjao will be ecstatic. Take the L with good grace, mate. Your conehead is back! Go and wreak havoc on the high seas again. Recoup that treasure. The world is your oyster!

Up on the balcony, Bartolomeo still has not revealed his connection with Luffy. Cavendish is still throwing a strop. Bellamy is lurking in the shadows, clearly in two minds about his new assassination mission. And Burgess, thanks to Cavendish and his big mouth, knows that Luffy is Lucy.

Thanks, Cavendish.

(And Burgess really does walk around chortling and flexing all the time. He’s like an evil All Might.)

Thus the Legendary Heroes of Green Bit were Born

This cast reunion based on Usopp’s total bullshit was so much fun.

I loved Usopp and Robin’s expressions when the Tontatta took them to their airport. They were starry-eyed. And so they should’ve been. It was a miniature version of a proper, fully-equipped modern airport. I wouldn’t be surprised if the place had Duty Free, passport control and Starbucks concessions.

But it was not a holiday destination Usopp and Robin were flying out to. The entire airport had been overtaken by a military operation. Cub, the yellow bee squad leader, and Bian, the pink bee squad leader, reported for duty. Usopp picked up the bee planes and kept saying, “I wanna show this to Luffy.” (They are such good pals, it warms my heart.)

Unfortunately, Usopp and Robin were too big to travel by bee plane, so they had to take the local number 20 bus to Dressrosa. The buses were cute, vulpix-like foxes with huge, fluffy tails you can sink right into for a comfortable ride.

While they made their way through the tunnel, Master Roshi - the pervy little Tontatta chief - emerged from Robin’s cleavage. He bore dire warnings. “I should tell you because you will risk your lives for our cause.”

Usopp was thinking, “I ain’t gonna die for you but go on...”

“Doflamingo has been causing our tribe a lot of pain recently, but our connection with him goes way back before the last decade. Nine hundred years ago!”

Then the narrator interrupted and I was like, “So you’re just going to leave it there when I was about to get Doflamingo family history? I am not at all mad about this. No, sir. Not one bit.”

The action cut to Flower Field, where Franky and Sol descended a secret stairwell. Said stairwell led to the Resistance Army HQ! Some soldiers ran up to Sol and addressed him as “Captain”, so Sol is a Big Deal in the Resistance.

Franky was like, “Why are all these small people swarming me?”

Sol explained. The Tontatta people were called fairies in town, how they moved faster than the human eye could detect and how they were immensely strong. Franky put two and two together and realised one of them stole Zoro’s sword!

And guess who reached Flower Field before Franky? Before any of the other Strawhats!

That’s right. It’s our boy Zoro. (So proud he learned to follow directions.)

Zoro, hilariously, had made himself at home and was watching Luffy vs Chinjao on the big screen TV. He was absolutely fuming. Why hadn’t Luffy told him there was a fighting competition? THE BETRAYAL. Will he get over it? Probably.

He must’ve been distracted by the fight, as he completely forgot 

Then some intelligence scouts ran up. They had a report for Sol. “We already know what our enemies and Sugar are doing!” (Sugar? Who dat?) “And with the battle close at hand, some legendary heroes have appeared at Tontatta: Usoland and Robiland. They have brought with them Luffyland, Zoroland, Namiland, Sanland, Chopperland, Fraland and Boneland.”

Franky and Zoro exchanged a Look. They knew instantly Usopp was on the bullshit wagon again.

“Um, I think I’m Zoroland,” Zoro said. (Lmao, better get into character quick.)

“And I’m Fraland. Nice to meet you!” Franky added.

It was round about then that Zoro remembered that Nami, Chopper and Brook were in serious trouble back on Sunny. He now wants to skip the battle (he doesn’t yet know about) and rescue the other Strawhats.

I wonder how this will go? Wicka did say she would let Zoro go back to Sunny once he’d taken her back to Resistance HQ. But Leo and the others back on Green Bit were suspicious of Robin and Usopp escaping. Will they let Zoro go or will he have to fight the battle first? Hmmm... I’m fifty/fifty about this.

God damn it, Caesar

*curb your enthusiasm music kicks in*

Meanwhile, back on Green Bit, Law was under heavy bombardment. Fujitora took a step back in this episode and Doflamingo stole the limelight. The cool music from Enies Lobby (as I call it in my head. I have no idea what the real title is) played as Doflamingo pursued Law. 

As Doflamingo was about to land a finishing blow, Caesar shrieked, “OI, JOKER! Before you kill Law, I need you to take something back for me. Law took my heart and I don’t know what he’s gonna do with it!”

Doflamingo looked round like, “Wtf... are you talking about?” And while he was distracted, Law shambled his way out of trouble.

Doflamingo was furious. FFS, CAESAR. I bet he wanted to say that but couldn’t. Gotta keep your cash cow scientist happy..

Please send help. Our art teacher has locked us in class.

Unfortunately, Law didn’t have time for a breather. He had an urgent phone call to make.

While Nami, Chopper and Brook were brought up to speed on the Humans Turning Into Toys situation by Giolla, the ship’s DDM rang. Chopper hilariously ignored Giolla and answered the call (she was maaaaad).

It was Law. He said, “Is that Nami-san?”

To my disappointment, Chopper did not answer, “No, this is Patrick.”

“I don’t care what’s going on over there,” Law said. “Listen carefully. I need you to sail Sunny to Green Bit right now. I wanna leave Caesar with you guys. No time to explain. Bye!”

Okay, so I added in the “bye” part. Law abruptly hung up.

I like how he has faith that Nami, Chopper and Brook will be able to handle the situation, but their weapons have been rendered usless by Giolla’s Art Art Fruit power. I have no idea how they’re going to get out of this one (and I’m keen to see Oda’s creative solution).

The shitshow that is Law’s current existence continued once he hung up. Doflamingo is Doflamingo. He caught up with Law again near the end of episode 648. With that slasher smile, he shot Law with a string bullet and demanded to know who Law had called for help.

Doflamingo must be confident he has Law where he wants him because he spilled the beans on his diabolical plan to snare Luffy. “Give me back Caesar’s heart already. It’s so meaningless for you to keep hanging on here. Strawhat has already walked into the trap I set. He’s fighting in the gladiatorial contest at the Colosseum. Tough contenders from all over the world come to fight in it. Outlaws only. It’s a deadly competition. When someone loses, it’s a one way ticket to hell! He will never come out of the Colosseum alive! It’s the end of your alliance, Law. Just give up!”

I wonder if Law will use the heart as leverage. Maybe he’ll give up Caesar’s heart to escape, regroup and stop Doflamingo the old-fashioned way: with Tontatta military might. (Doflamingo better not kill him off...)

Were I to sum up 643 and 644, it would be: unexpected feels and reveals.

The feels came from poor Brutal. It was all going so well! Luffy found a new pal and then, BAM.

The reveals? Well, we have the “return” of Norland from Skypeia, for one thing. Flower Field also seems to be the location for the next Big Showdown. 

The Donquixote Family have also made some moves. Diamante has put Bellamy in an uncomfortable position and an... artistic new character has been introduced. As for Doflamingo himself, he revealed a past working relationship with Trafalgar Law (I knew it! I knew there was something there!)

Oh, and we have yet another ridiculously powerful Admiral. :D

Fujitora is My New Favourite Admiral

This entire scene escalated quickly. It went from Dodgy Dealings to Dragon Ball in the blink of an eye. Not exactly an exemplary lesson in conflict resolution, but I am not complaining. 

Because it was awesome.

Law was understandably pissed off at being duped by Doflamingo. It wasn’t really Law’s fault. He’d planned the best he could with the information he had to hand. Unfortunately, it was just as Vergo had foretold: not knowing about Doflamingo’s past would be Law’s undoing.

Law refused to hand over Caesar. Doflamigo had reneged on his side of the bargain. “The deal’s off!”

Then Doflamingo said something interesting. “Is that how you talk to your boss after ten years of silence?”

Boss? Really?

I freaking knew it. I knew there was something between Doflamingo, Law and Vergo. It was the way Vergo spoke to Law back in Punk Hazard, calling him a brat, acting as if he knew everything about Law, about how he had improved but not enough. Doflamingo treats him in a similar way. Law is from North Blue, a territory in the New World. Dressrosa is in the New World. Was Law born in a territory claimed by Doflamingo?

I wonder what caused Law to go radio silence and desert Doflamingo? It must have been something horrendous. Maybe Law knows Doflamingo a bit better than he lets on.

Whatever the case, Doflamingo was adamant in retrieving Caesar. (Caesar’s starry-eyed moment was hilarious. I’d say he’s totally in love with Doflamingo, but the only thing I’d ship Caesar with is research funding).

There was a quick, “Yeah, I’ve heard all about you” exposition moment. Just to bring any viewers up to speed on Fujitora in case they missed that awesome episode when he sent an unfortunate bunch of fodders to a hole in the ground hell. “You were appointed as  Marine Admiral through the World Military Draft,” Doflamingo said. “I’ve heard a lot about you. They say you’re a monster who wields unquestionable power as well as Ryokugyu.”

First thing: World Military Draft? That’s a new one to me. Was Fujitora plucked from obscurity to become an Admiral through a military draft? Or was he retired in some capacity and they brought him back? Whatever Fujitora’s deal is, I’d be interested in finding out.

Second thing: what the hell is a Ryokugu?

Caesar’s presence at the Green Bit beach was of great interest to Fujitora and his Marines. Fujitora knew who Caesar was, which implies he has been briefed on all the Big Criminals or he does have prior experience working with the Marines. He is also familiar The Way Things Are, as he admitted they couldn’t arrest Caesar if he was working for Doflamingo (the perks of being a Shichibukai). He knows Doflamingo is a nasty bit of work but, as Doflamingo said, he has to be able to prove it. (I wonder if Fujitora is trying to do just that?)

Interestingly, it seemed like Fujitora also tried to throw Law a similar lifeline. Law is still officially a Shichibukai. His movements are crucial to the success of the Marine’s mission. If the Strawhats were working under Law, Fujitora was prepared to ignore the alliance. However, were it an alliance of equals, it would go against the Marines’ interests and Fujitora would be forced to arrest Law.

Law made some quick calculations. His original plan had failed. Even if he selected Fujitora’s Option #1, he would have to take the matter to Dressrosa and that would only make matters worse.

He chose Option #2 and fessed up to the alliance with the Strawhats.

“Welp, guess I’ll have to arrest you!” Fujitora said.

And a beautiful, big kaboom moment happened. Not only can Fujitora fire folk into holes in the ground, he can also crush them from above. A mighty meteorite came screaming down onto Green Bit. Caesar and the Fodders scarpered. Even Doflamingo was like, “FFS, is that not excessive?”

When the smoke cleared, only the three main fighters stood on conveniently preserved pillars of ground (hilarious, classic shounen trope. Love it).

Doflamingo was not pleased. “How did the Fleet Admiral train you, you damned stray dog!”

Fujitora remained supremely unfazed. “Thank you. I just wanted to test your skills. Now I’m going to arrest you, Is that okay, Law-san?” 

He’s such a polite guy. I like him.

But there’s just one thing. Doflamingo wants Law too. I don’t think he’ll let Fujitora get his hands on Law. If that happens, Law might spill the beans (I doubt he would but it’s possible). Then all Doflamingo’s secrets will be out.

The plot chickenz.

Flower Field Rendezvous Crew

Well, I think I know where the Strawhats will reconvene once all the subplots have run their course.

Flower Field is the place to be, folks!

I’m kind of relieved Sanji is back on track again. Once he realised Law was in trouble, he called Franky to update him. I love how Franky was like, “Yo, Sanji. What’s up?” and Sanji was like, “Well, I’m in love,” and Franky just said, “That’s nice. Btw, I think I can find the factory but we can’t just destroy it and get away. It’s a much bigger task than we thought! Oh yeah, and I read the newspaper. Doflamingo sure fooled us!”

Even Franky was trying to steer Sanji back to the plot, lmao.

Then Franky mentioned he was heading to Flower Field with Sol and that Sanji should meet him there to catch up.

Sanji finally caught up with Plot and mentioned the ominous fact that he couldn’t reach Nami or any of the others on Sunny. Franky replied, “You still think she’s weak? Anyway, Brook and Monster Chopper are with her. She’ll be fine!”

I kind of think Sanji had a point here. It’s not about thinking Nami’s weak. It’s the fact she’s not answering the DDM. If I were Franky, I’d be like, “Yeah, something’s not right. Let me try and see if I can get her to answer.”

Violet then exited the plot stage left. Before she ran off, she handed Sanji a very useful piece of intel: a map to the Smile Factory (it’s disguised as a Toy House). Sanji told her to take care of herself and also where the Strawhats’ final rendezvous point is (Western Harbour). I’m still a teeny bit suspicious of her because there is still time for her to be caught by Doflamingo and sell out the Strawhats.

Then Foxfire interrupted (lmao) and announced Sanji had to accompany him to a place called Toy House right away. Turns out that’s where Kanjuuro is also being held.

Am I right to be suspicious about how easily this is all working out for the Strawhats at the moment? I feel like Doflamingo knows what they’re up to and is leading them into a trap.

Norland’s Back!

Oh, how I missed your resplendent, chestnut barnet! That’s two sneaky Skypiea callbacks now (more on that later).

And why has Norland cropped up again?

Turns out he visited the Tontatta Kingdom four-hundred years ago, as a botanist. A crew of Evil Big Humans were destroying the Tontatta Kingdom and Norland, being an Absolute Lad, fought alongside them and helped them defeat the evil Big Humans. 

Usopp, being a smart guy, noticed the statue of Norland and totally took advantage. He had a chestnut-shaped helmet on and claimed to be Usoland, a descendant of Norland himself. The Tontatta people totally believed him and now they’re waiting on him hand and foot.

Robin was like, “Usopp, you are a terrible person,” and Usopp shot back with, “Well, it saved you too!” Fair point, Usopp!

It sort of backfired on him, though, because the chief arrived and announced Usopp’s presence on this most auspicious day must be fate. Why was that? Well, today was the day the Tontatta people vowed to fight the Donquixote Family! At Dressrosa, they will fight. The commander and fellow soldiers of the King Riku Army are expecting them at Flower Field. They begged Usopp to stand at the forefront of the charge and lead them. With Usoland, the Tontatta would be unbreakable!

I wish I could have seen Robin’s face at that moment.

But Flower Field, eh? I wonder if Sol the Toy and the Resistance movement have been working with the Tontatta People to muster up this rebellion? Signs point to yes, since Wicka was super keen for Zoro to take her to Flower Field.

At any rate, that’s Franky, Zoro, Usopp and Robin all headed for Flower Field. I bet they end up caught in the crossfire. So much for remaining undercover, eh?

Not the Worst Installation I’ve Ever Seen

So... Giolla’s a bit of a character, isn’t she?

It’s like meeting Miss Goldenweek’s eccentric art teacher.

To be honest, I think Nami, Brook and Chopper got the raw end of the deal being left behind on Sunny. They’re the first ones to face off against a Donquixote Family member. And one with a pretty bizarre but cool power too.

Giolla’s introduction was pretty cool. Screechy violin harmonics hinted something sinister was afoot. Nami, Brook, Chopper and Momo peered into the dorm and were like, “wtf is this lsd nonsense?”

Then came footsteps; shoes oddly similar to the ones Doflamingo wears (there must be a Donquixote Family dresscode). A cloud of colourful smoke turned the place into coloring book land.

The Strawhats reeled back, horrified. Chopper wondered if it was the work of a Devil Fruit user.

“Bad Taste Fruit?” Brook suggested. (Lmao, Brook!)

The door creaked open and Giolla appeared in all her art-teacher glory.

Nami was like, “Who the hell are you and what have you done to Sunny?”

Giolla shrieked at her to shut up. The goons she brought with her answered Nami’s question. “This is Giolla-sama of the Donquixote Family!”

Uh oh, I thought. This could be a problem.

“I don’t like people with no artistic taste!” Giolla declared. “My soul is swinging. I see an image. My mind is about to erupt! It’s going to explode! An image of liberty and beauty.”

Then she transformed Nami, Brook, Chopper and Momo into 2D versions of themselves. Nami demanded Giolla turn them back, but, interestingly, Giolla countered she would only do that if they handed over Momonosuke without a fight. What is that all about? Hmm... I’m starting to think there is something going on with Momonosuke. Why would Doflamingo want Momo? I guess he was caught up in all the Punk Hazard stuff. Maybe it’s a “no witnesses” situation. Or maybe Momo ate a really good fruit meant for Kaidou and Doflamingo wants to sell Momo to Kaidou to make up for the cool Dragon fruit disappearing?

Whatever the real reason, the Strawhats obviously refused. Negotiations broke down. Giolla attacked again. The Strawhats hatched a plan to lure her away from Sunny but for all Giolla acts like an eccentric art teacher, she is no fool when it comes to battle.

Poor Sunny looks pretty... different at the moment. 

Nami, Brook, Chopper and Momo are also surrounded by Giolla and her goons. Have no idea how they’ll escape but I love how Brook is most concerned about how mad Franky will be when he gets back.

Press F to Pay Your Respects for Brutal

F

Oh, the unexpected feels.

It was all going so well in the Colosseum. Luffy made friends with Brutal Bull when it challenged him in the ring. They had fun for a bit but once Luffy decided it was haki time, the fight was over. To my ABSOLUTE DELIGHT, Luffy did not punch out Brutal or finish him off.

No.

They teamed up! Luffy made a new bull friend! It was so adorable watching them mercilessly mow down the other fodders. They were having such a great time.

Until Hajrudin, the Giant Fun Sponge from Elbaf totally ruined it all.

Brutal accidentally got his horns stuck in Hajrudin’s boot. Hajrudin’s big hammer came down. I gasped. No! Luffy was fine but Brutal had been crushed.

“His little bull back legs. He needs them!” I wailed.

Luffy knelt down beside Brutal and touched him gently on the shoulder. Without saying a word, I knew revenge was imminent and inevitable.You know when Luffy’s eyes shift from one to two circles that shit is about to go down.

Cape blowing in the wind, he stood up, sized up Hajrudin, and executed a haki-filled beatdown worthy of Brutal’s name.

I can’t help but wonder if this scene with Brutal was a sneaky anti-bloodsports commentary from Oda? Maybe if you squint? I mean, instead of torturing an innocent bull for fun, what Luffy did was be friends with the bull; fight *with* the bull. The one who did harm the bull received a Gear 2nd Armored Haki punch right to the face.

I kind of hope Brutal is okay. I have visions of him recovering from his injuries and spending his days trampling people in Flower Field for years to come.

Things aren’t looking quite as simple for Luffy, though.

It seems everyone on Dressrosa is trying to kill him! Diamante slipped Bellamy a note in the Donquixote Family private backstage room. Said note contained orders from Doflamingo: Bellamy is to assassinate Luffy. One last chance at promotion. Obviously, Bellamy is now conflicted about this, as Luffy cheered him on in the ring and inspired him to travel to Skypiea. (I’m leaning towards Bellamy attempting, then regretting and betraying Doflamingo.)

Cavendish Banana is also on the warpath (him fending off Bartolomeo’s food-thieving hands with a fork was hilarious. “MINE. MY FOOD. NO.”) Obviously, Cavendish’s reason for wanting to kill Luffy is profoundly shallow. “Luffy stole muh limelight, wah!”

Bartolomeo said, “Well, my connection with Strawhat Luffy is much deeper.”

I gasped. 

Yes, I thought. This is the moment. 

What is the history here? Because I have watched this show since episode one. I have a goldfish memory but I’d like to think Bartolomeo would have stood out.

But do you know what?

BARTOLOMEO LEFT IT THERE. WITHOUT ANOTHER WORD.

BLUE-BALLED.

FREAKING CLIFFHANGER.

Shaking my head, man. Bartolomeo, you are so rude. Such a meta character.

And by the way, there is also something up with Ricky and Rebecca. Don’t think I missed that little scene. I bet it’s something to do with Kyros. That whole thing about everyone forgetting why the statue is there is so suspicious.

There is something rotten in the state of Dressrosa right now. Doflamingo has some seriously shady shenanigans on the go. Turning humans into toys? Letting them live alongside relatives who - it appears - have their memories wiped? Tossing them for scrap if they show any signs of rebellion? Yeah, this whole situation is totally messed up. Now I get why a Resistance is mounting against the Donquixote Family. 

I watched three episodes because I thought I might see the end of the Block C battles. No such luck, but Luffy vs Don Chinjao has been fun so far. 

Still, that freaky Toy Human transformation reveal was totally worth it. 

(Will catch up on replies this week too! It’s been a weirdly busy couple of weeks but next week won’t be as rammed. :D)

Electric Fist Bump

I am still not certain that Brutal Bull is, in fact, going to recover. Let’s just pretend he will. At least Luffy gently carried him to safety and thanked him for fighting with him. ;_;

A random called Ideo (way too much eyeliner, Shoulders McGee) finished the job by punching Hajrudin out the ring. After Ideo’s brag-fest, I thought Luffy would be the one to kick his ass too, but it was funnier than that.

A random competitor called Jean the Bounty Hunter (no relation to Dog) had seen through Luffy’s disguise. He knocked off Luffy’s helmet and slashed his beard. Instead of giving up his disguise, Luffy chased him (lmao) to get his helmet back. 

Once exposing Luffy, didn’t work, Jean picked up all the weapons dropped by competitors who fell to Don Chinjao’s conqueror’s haki. Jean seriously thought he could defeat Luffy by carrying around a giant blade ball. Okay, mate.

Jean, at least, was allowed a quick shit-talk. He’d made so much money recapturing all the criminals Luffy set free from Impel Down. Now, Jean was aiming to snare Buggy (I guess he doesn’t read the papers), Crocodile, Jimbei, Ivankov and Shiryu (good luck with those names, mate).

Meanwhile, Luffy was standing there, reminiscing over all the old names like it was old times. “I wonder how Jimbei and Iva are doing?”

Jean got mad, threw his dumb sword ball and... it did not go to plan.

Luffy dodged.

Instead, a rather large and intimidating man absorbed all the swords.

Staring down Don Chinjao was too much for poor Jean. He was so scared, he made moe eyes before Don Chinjao took him out. (Good luck chasing after Crocodile from your new job on Doflamingo’s Factory Assembly Line!)

The fight between Luffy and Don Chinjao was actually fun to watch. The moment when they both punched out Sai and Ideo “Get outta the way!” was funny. And the Conqueror’s Haki clash was stylish (still love that blue filter), powerful (that Whitebeard soundtrack) and also pretty interesting.

Diamante watched the whole thing from his private booth. He used it as a teaching moment for Bellamy. “See, that is what it takes to be a king.” Don Chinjao sort of backed this up later when he said to Luffy that loads of people in the New World could use Conqueror’s Haki. “Only battling it out amongst themselves will reveal who the Pirate King will be. A battle of conquerors. That’s what’ll decide.”

I thought Conqueror’s Haki was a much rarer type. Maybe it still is, but that all the big shots are now concentrated in a smaller area, so there’s more chance you’ll meet someone with it. I know Shanks has it, I know Whitebeard had it, but I’m wondering if Big Mom and Kaidou also have it? (The jury’s out on Teach. Is he too much of a coward, or will he awaken it too? Who knows?)

Don Chinjao also kept veering between wailing with rage and attacking with rage at what Garp had taken from him (treasure and strength, apparently).  He also kept demanding Luffy tell him what Garp had done. Luffy was like, “No, you walnut. I have no idea. How many times must I repeat myself?”

Luffy didn’t know whether Don Chinjao wanted to be sad or mad. Maybe Luffy should set himself up as a therapist because I think it’s a bit of both.

At the moment, Don Chinjao has transformed into an Upside Down Tornado of Large Man, so we’ll see how that pans out in the coming episodes.

Oh, and by the way, Bobby Funk wore his brother like a jacket during the fight. Don’t ask. It was deeply, hilariously weird and I’m glad they got their asses kicked because I felt wrong watching that.

He’s Not an Idiot. He’s Directionally Disadvantaged

On the way to Flower Field, Wicka was astonished to discover Zoro is the opposite of a homing pigeon. They yelled at each other the entire time. Wicka because Zoro veered away from Flower Field yet again, and Zoro because Wicka “sucked at leading the way.” Meanwhile, the concerned residents of Dressrosa wondered why the strange man was yelling at himself.

Wicka kept punching Zoro for not going the right way. Because the Tontatta people make up for their lack of stature with super strength, I actually cheered when Zoro had enough of Wicka smacking him. He set her down in a plant pot, was like, “I have friends I care about too. Stop complaining or ask some damned cat to carry you,” then walked off.

Damn straight, Zoro. Don’t put up with that crap.

Luckily for Wicka, Zoro has no sense of direction. He circled straight round, which gave her the opportunity to apologise.

I guess it’s for the best. Otherwise Zoro would end up stuck on Dressrosa forever. Or at least until Sanji turned up.

And speaking of Sanji, he has teamed up with Kinemon again. They are currently lurking outside the Colosseum. They have spotted something ominous. Lots of Marines gathered outside, including new Vice-Admiral Bastille, waiting to swoop and arrest any unsuspecting Block A and Block B fighters leaving the arena.

I laughed at Kinemon’s weird cognitive dissonance. “Yeah, well criminals should be caught!”

Sanji would not have it. He smacked Kinemon and was like, “You are working with pirates.” Lmao, Kinemon. Old habits die hard, I guess.

At least Sanji has returned to the Sanji I like best: sneaking about, trying to solve problems. He knows Luffy needs to know about the Marines lurking outside, but how to tell him?

Plus, what’s happened to all the Block A and Block B competitors who lost their fight? Vice-Admiral Bastille is on to something. None of them have left the Colosseum. Not a single one. That is strange. Something weird, and possibly sinister, is going on here. (I wonder if they’re being turned into toys?)

This is Why I Like Nami

This was only a short scene but I loved it.

In the last couple of episodes, I assumed Nami, Brook, Chopper and Momo were retreating to regroup with a master plan to win back Sunny.

Nope. As if they would ever leave Sunny in the hands of an enemy. What was I thinking?

Even though Nami sees herself as weak compared to the DF eaters and haki users of the crew, she is not helpless. One, she is smart, and two, Nami has freaking weather controlling powers! Nami used both of those qualities to her advantage. Chopper and Brook were a distraction. While Giolla’s attention was on them, Nami readied some thunder balls.

BOOM! Direct hit on Giolla’s submarine. Now, as a DF user, she has no means to return to Dressrosa and all her goons were smoked by thunderbolt.

Your move, Giolla! :D

How About Hide-and-Seek?

Like, with a four day head start? 

No?

I guess Law must be content with running like hell from the two Absolute Monsters chasing him. Fujitora was not making it easy. Every time he sheathes that sword, a jet of purple (no idea what it is. Let’s call it pure purple) rocketed into the clouds and, hello meteor shower!

Luckily, Law can Room those and slice them like bread rolls, but Doflamingo’s bullet strings were another matter. Law scarpered, dodged, hid and tried to call Nami. To no avail. Why wasn’t she picking up?

“I know what you’re trying to do. You’re trying to buy time,” Doflamingo said. “And I’m not gonna let you have it your way.”

No Burger King for you, Law.

Poor, beleaguered Law screeched to a halt when he realised that, somehow, Fujitora had overtaken him. My new favourite Admiral was sitting on a rock, as if he’d been politely waiting for Law to show for ages. Then it was meteor time.

Even Doflamingo was like, “Wow, you have no mercy.”

Fujitora just said, “I’m all thumbs.”

Lmao, mate. Yeah, those extreme overkill meteors? I’m just clumsy. Nah, no one believes you, Fujitora. You love smashing felons. Admit it.

Meanwhile, deep underground, Usopp was beginning to regret feigning descent from Noland. The ominous, earth-shattering rumbles from Fujitora’s onslaught were passed off as “just Usopp’s amazing haki!”

When he realised the Tontatta people kept going on about the Donquixote Family, he consulted Robin. “Um, what kind of relationship do they have with Doflamingo exactly?” he asked.

“Well, they’re serious about fighting him,” Robin replied.

Usopp had an uh-oh moment. He drew Leo (the battle hype man) aside and asked why they wanted to fight Doflaming. That’s my Usopp! Asking all the right plot questions.

Apparently, the Tontatta want to rescue five hundred friends forced to work at the “shady factory”. Moreover, Doflamingo also holds their “obnoxious, selfish, mean, moody and short-tempered Princess Mancherie” there too.

Good sell, Leo. Good sell.

“Um, she sounds horrible,” Usopp said (lmao).

“Yup!” Leo cheerfully agreed. But then he added, rather sweetly, “But she’s one of us too. Noland would save everyone who’s in trouble, right?”

Usopp looked a bit ill at that point. He did not have to answer that question, as Flapper, another Tontatta kid, hoofed it into frame. Apparently, the Donquixote Family at the palace were on the move. Rumour had it they were probably moving to the Colosseum basement. And why were they moving there?

Under the Colosseum is only where the Shady Factory is hidden! :D

I thought the Factory would be in Green Bit. This is even better! Now I’m very suspicious about all the defeated fighters. They are prime for processing. At least I got one thing right about people being forced to work at the Factory (though it wasn’t related to stealing stuff). 

This Really Makes You Re-Think Toy Story

I knew it! I knew there was something weird with the toys. At first I just went with it because, well, One Piece, right? There are giants, sentient fruit-eating swords, dudes stuck in barrels. Anything goes, right? I mean, who can explain the wonder of Gekko Moria?

Turns out this does not extend to talking toys. Talking toys are not normal. Unless they’ve been invented by Vegapunk, as Franky rightly thought.

Nope. These toys are not the work of Vegapunk.

They are the product of a twisted Devil Fruit user under the employ of Doflamingo, who transforms humans into toys.

Why? I have no idea.

But the reason has got to be some dodgy kind of punishment for something. 

There was a creepy scene when a toy desperately tried to convince the woman who was once his girlfriend that he was a human, that they once lived together, were once happy together. The trouble was, his girlfriend could not remember him! She looked at him in disgust, said, “This toy has human syndrome!” and he was dragged off to a ominous looking building with the word SCRAP emblazoned above a forbidding door.

It seems a lot of the toys remember being human. Sol spoke to a guy called Milo, who is currently masquerading as Onepoko-chan the dog. Turns out the boy who plays with him is actually his son, and the boy’s mother is his wife.

What. The. Actual?

Sol asked the boy if he had a dad. Nope, was the answer. What about the wife? Had she ever been married? Don’t be silly.

Something really, really weird is going on here. And I never even mentioned the midnight curfew. Anyone who is caught outside after then is arrested (and probably turned into a toy). Toys and humans are allowed to hang about during the day, but at night? They are segregated. Toys live in toy homes. Humans remain in their homes.

This is totally weird and cool and I cannot wait to see where this goes.

Every time questions are answered in Dressrosa, another ten rise to take their place. :D

I knew there was something up with that toy.

Never thought he’d be part of the Resistance, though. (May the force be with you, Sol.)

Once Block B’s Battle Royale concluded (more on that later), the action cut to Franky and Sol the Toy. Sol was suspicious and alarmed by Franky’s willingness to ask any random person he met about destroying a top secret local weapons factory. But Franky was unmoved. He needed intel. He followed Sol out into the stairwell.

At first, it seemed Sol wouldn’t talk. Franky threatened to leave and find someone else. “I said I need to beat up a Donquixote Family member and find out how to destroy the Smile factory!”

But Sol’s caginess stemmed from the fact that he was already involved in a similar plot! (Very cool.) “You keep talking about this radical plan, but why do you want to do such a thing? It seems like you know things ordinary people don’t. What is your true purpose?”

Franky kept his mouth shut. He’s streetwise enough to know not to let any old random in on the Strawheart Alliance’s Yonkou Stompin Plan.

But he was also smart enough to spot a potential ally. “Then you too!” he said. “Where is the factory? Tell me right now and I’ll destroy it.”

Sol refused. He was not against destroying the factory but first, “we want to save the workers.” The use of ‘we’ was a definite giveaway. Sol is not acting alone. He mentioned Rebecca earlier. Maybe she’s part of the Resistance too? I am also suspicious about this Ricky character. He also hates Doflamingo. I have a funny feeling he might be connected to Kyros too (maybe he is Kyros). After all, no one remembers seeing him fight, he just disappeared and it was only twenty years ago this happened.

Another issue Sol raised was that the fall of the factory could lead to the downfall of Dressrosa itself. (Hence Franky shouting about the factory in public not being a good idea.) Okay, I thought. That makes sense. It’d trash the local economy and bring upon the island the wrath of Kaidou. But in that case, why would Sol want that to happen? Well, maybe not *want* it to happen. It’s more like, why would Sol rather have Kaidou wreck the place rather than let the status quo run its course?

I felt like Sol almost gave it away when he said to Franky, “If you have the nerve and are determined to go against Doflamingo, I’m going to tell you everything about this tragic kingdom of Dressrosa!”

Yes, please! Please do tell us all about the tragic kingdom of Dressrosa!

But I was blueballed. The credits rolled and the plot hasn’t circled back to Sol and Franky.

I’ll make a mad prediction while I wait. I’m thinking all these invisible fairies hanging about might be the original inhabitants of Dressrosa and the Donquixote Family have enslaved them or are forcing them to work in the factory for practically nothing. 

And the Winner Is...?

Meanwhile, in the Colosseum, Block B’s battle was about to conclude.

The twists and turns here were great. I guessed Bartolomeo would emerge the victor (laws of shounen: the fighter who is totally relaxed and barely lifts a finger always ends up winning (this only applies to battles that aren’t vital to the plot)). But how the fight played out was really entertaining and I never imagined it ending that way.

The mystery of Bartolomeo’s Devil Fruit power was kept until the very end of the fight. Even Bellamy’s speed and power couldn’t break Bartolomeo’s strange, deflective powers. At first I thought it was a rebound power. This was only because Bartolomeo seemed surprised by one of Bellamy’s attacks (like the power seemed to happen automatically - not controlled by Bartolomeo). Now I know Bartolomeo must have had his fingers crossed while Bellamy was attacking. The only thing that planted a seed of doubt? Bellamy did manage to grab Bartolomeo. How had that worked?

The scene of multiple betrayals was fun. Dagama urged the fodder fighters to regroup, muster their strength and focus attacks on Blue Gilly - only for Dagama to cut them down when their backs were turned and reveal he had really teamed up with Blue Gilly all along! That was a fun twist in itself. Then, when Gilly double-crossed Dagama.... ooooh, the intrigue! The fact the fodders were probably coerced into fighting because Dagama had poisoned them only upped the scumbag stakes.

I love that Dagama had the cheek to complain Blue Gilly double-crossed him. It’s like Gilly said, “Can’t believe people would trust a dubious guy like him in the first place!”

While everyone was double-crossing each other, Elizabello shadow-boxed and sweat-dropped. A bunch of chuckling, vengeful thugs surrounded him. Gilly decided to gloat. Called him a “helpless king without a court” who couldn’t do anything without Dagama.

When Liz ceased so shadow box... that should have been everyone’s clue to take him out. Instead, the other idiots in the ring let Liz power up. The guy stood there red-faced, yelling and popping veins like he was locked in the bathroom suffering through a difficult poop.

Even the audience knew something was wrong before they did. A group of worried randoms figured out their section of the Colosseum would be wrecked if they didn’t scarper.

By the time Gilly and the other fighters noticed something was seriously wrong, Gilly’s attempt to take Liz out was too late. KABOOM! Liz threw the King Punch. It was pretty spectacular. A golden-tinged impact that would have done Caesar proud. It took out almost everyone. Bellamy, Gilly, everyone who had been knocked out, was blown away into the moat.

Only a single-person remained in the ring.

IT WAS ME, DIO BARTOLOMEO!

Yes, it was Bartolomeo! And the trick he had been using to job the entire fight was revealed by Liz’s King Punch. 

Bellamy was right: Bartolomeo was a Devil Fruit user. He has eaten the Barrier Barrier Fruit, which enables him to protect himself from (any?) attacks if he crosses his fingers. He also unwittingly used his powers to save a large section of the Colosseum and the crowd who would have been obliterated by the blast. Not sure if he’d like that. But a win was a win, right?

Interestingly, Bartolomeo also has a reason for fighting. After he told the audience to go to hell, he declared he would win the Mera Mera Fruit and dedicate it to “That Person.”

As yet, I have absolutely no clue who it could be. 

But Bartolomeo’s reaction to finding out Strawhat Luffy was in the mix was intriguing. Was that fear I saw on his face? I’m trying to remember if I’ve ever seen Bartolomeo before but am drawing a complete blank. The weirdest thing was that there was no confrontation between Luffy and Bartolomeo. Looking forward to seeing what is up with this guy later on.

Luffy cheering on Bellamy was a good twist too. Actually, it’s not really a twist. When it comes to most people Luffy doesn’t care much about the past (Teach and Akainu are probably on the shit list for good). If he can forgive you, then all is forgotten. Of course, Bellamy felt embarrassed being cheered on by the old enemy who gave him a pasting. Doubly so, since he has failed again and Luffy has become so much stronger (able to use Conqueror’s haki - like Doflamingo, I guess).

Now the focus is on Block C. The competitors here seem a bit fodderish, with the exception of Don Chinjao. We have Sai, Boo, Brutal Bull (lmao), Hajrudin a Giant pirate mercenary from Elbaf, some fighting champ called Ideo, the Funk Brothers (lmao) and some guy called Jean the Bandit. Rebecca should clean up here. Then, when Block D comes around, it’ll be Luffy vs Cabbage.

Unpopular Opinion Time

I am beginning to like Caesar.

There must be something wrong with me.

Oda, I can’t believe you’ve done this. It is entirely your fault.

The action cut from Bartolomeo’s horrified Luffy realisation to the Caesar Handover Team out on the bridge.

My prediction that it would take them ages to cross the bridge was shot down in glorious flames. Thanks to Caesar, it didn’t even take them half an episode! Thank you, Oda.

It turned out the solid-looking iron bridge praised by Usopp was not especially robust. I think Caesar jinxed it, though. He was the one who said, “We’ll be fine if the fish don’t strike.”

Then a bubbling rumble in the depths announced itself. I lol’d heartily when a Vast Horned Abomination slammed itself into the barrier and stared at them with a grin stretched across its face and a look of murder in its mad, red eyes that said, “There will not be a second smash.” (I liked their design, by the way. The fighting fish look awesome.)

As Law wanted to reserve most of his strength for the return journey, he left Robin and Usopp to smack down the fighting fish (literally in Robin’s case). They were doing a fine job, but when Law asked Usopp to uncuff Caesar so he could fight...

Holy moly, Caesar is actually pretty strong. I keep forgetting, since he acts like such a highly-strung goofball diva a lot of the time, but damn... those Gastille beams fried those fish like it was cookout season!

Still, there were a lot of fish. And the bridge had collapsed in the middle. With nowhere to run, Law almost used Room, but the offending fish was speared, netted and dragged away along the other half of the bridge by freaked out, invisible people. (Interesting.)

Once Caesar was convinced to fly them all over the broken bridge (Caesar is basically Law’s bitch now his heart’s in a box. He is hilariously bitter about it,) they discovered the netted fish drag marks led straight to Green Bit.

It’s a strange place, is Green Bit. It is supposedly deserted and is therefore overgrown, wild, full of animal life. Ships lie wrecked all round the coast. A single, huge rose towers over everything else (hence the name Dressrosa?) Usopp should be fine here. He’s used to hostile wilderness terrain. Unless the invisible fairy people attack them. Then all bets are off.

KNEW IT.

I totally knew Sanji was being played.

Still, I’m glad the dumb charade has finally run its course. At least it only lasted for a couple of minutes each episode. I was getting tired of Sanji dropping all his Strawhat responsibilities for a random.

Got to admit, though, the brief skirmish with the thugs in the warehouse was cool. Sanji was so fast, the guy never knew what hit him. Sanji is always so stylish when he fights.

And look at what it’s got him into. Cuffed and likely hauled off to who-knows-what fate. Sanji’s reaction to Violet was interesting. It was almost like he recognised her face. (Either that or realisation hit that he was being played the entire time.) Whatever the case, this plot line has just become ten times more interesting and I’m looking forward to seeing where it leads.

If I can make another mad prediction? Violet is a member of CP0. Absolutely no basis for this other than she looks pretty dead behind the eyes, is kinda scary and her working with CP0 would tie them into the main plot nicely.

Those veins will blow any second! 

You need to relax. Subscribe to Headspace. Take a yoga class. Kill some innocent Marines--- oh...

Oda has knocked it out of the park yet again. Now Doflamingo has entered the game, the implications of the wider criminal network of New World pirates has come to the fore. This, of course, means Law’s plan to take down Kaidou is not only super ambitious but also fraught with peril.

Considering I go on and on about peril like a broken record, this is a good thing.

And sorry about that last mini hiatus, by the way. Blame it on full rewrites and Resident Evil 2.

“Watcha thinkin’ bout, Luffy?”  “Chikkin.”

“And thus the Strawhat crew spent some time intoxicated during their celebrations.”

Eloquently summed up by the Narrator, I feel. xD  Totally love how the Strawhats can switch from party mode to sober and ready to sail within minutes. Guess that’s part of the pirate job description. Things change on a whim out there in the New World. Sobering up fast is a vital survival skill.

There was a mini recap of the terms of Law’s alliance with Luffy. Smoker wanted to know what was going on. “There’s no way you believed I’d keep a promise to a pirate like you. If you really wanted to silence me, you had plenty of chances to kill me. What are you planning to use Strawhat for?”

At first I was like, what the hell, Smoker? Stop being arsey with all the Marines vs Pirates crap. You only escaped Punk Hazard alive because you teamed up with Law. Everyone’s on the same page right now. What happens on Punk Hazard stays on Punk Hazard. None of your men will rat on you for chatting to Law. Later, of course, I changed my opinion on this.

The recap of the Law/Luffy alliance chat revealed a bit more information about Kaidou. According to Law, Kaidou the Beast is known as the most powerful creature in the world. Creature, I think, being the operative word here because he might not actually be human?

One of those hype-building silhouette stills showed up, with Big Mom, Blackbeard, Kaidou, Shanks and Whitebeard. Couldn’t make out much of Kaidou, so I’m still none the wiser on the appearance front. Maybe he’ll be hairy, with that whole beast thing he’s got going on.

Back in the present, Law was characteristically cagey about the chat with Smoker. He told Smoker there was no real reason he let him live, but turned round and spilled that he was “planning on heading to Green Bit.”

I’m still confused about the Green Bit scene. Mainly because I have no clue where/what it is. Is is a code name for Dressrosa? Is it another island completely? Is it a town somewhere in the New World? Or is Law trying to throw Smoker off the scent because he doesn’t want his favourite smokey Marine to be endangered again?

Whatever the case, Law had some final business to attend to before waving goodbye to Punk Hazard. Caesar, Baby 5 and Buffalo were chained up in a corner and drew the filthiest looks when he walked over. (Well, Baby 5 and Buffalo did. Caesar was still unconscious.) They really are acting as if Law has betrayed them somehow.

Doflamingo also keeps calling Law a brat. Vergo was also riding the brat train hard. Can’t help but think Law was affiliated with Doflamingo when he was a kid. Maybe he resented it all these years and this is overdue payback.

We hate love hate love you JUST GO BEFORE WE CRY!

At the harbour, the Strawhats continued to be absolute diamonds. Apparently, Nami and Chopper refused to sail until they knew the kids would be okay. The good news is that Vegapunk himself offered to help cure the kids of Caesar’s meth candy! Wonder what Vegapunk is thinking right now. He used to work with Caesar. Probably, “Always knew that guy was an asshole.”

As Luffy couldn’t be bothered waiting for another Marine ship to arrive, he told Smoker to just take the SAD tanker and send the kids home on it. Good decision, given a feathery menace was approaching at speed.

The scene with the G5 pretending to hate the Strawhats - erecting a protective banner so the kids wouldn’t be able to thank the dirty, cheating pirates - made me mad at first. I thought, damn, was that ungrateful or what? The Strawhats were the reason they escaped Caesar’s lab with their lives. If the Strawhats hadn’t been there, they would be locked up in cells and the last thing they’d ever hear would be a hiss of gas and a soft, “Shurorororororororo....”

But when the foghorn blasted and the ship set sail, Oda revealed some of the G5 guys’ inner thoughts. Sanji lead them out. Zoro and Tashigi teamed up. Law and Smoker fought together. Usopp guided the Minions to safety. Chopper and Nami helped the kids. Then I saw the sweat drops and the oddly tight jawlines.

Yup. They were fronting.

When Tashigi called them out on their rudeness, they even admitted it. “But Tashigi-chan, if we don’t stop insulting them, we’ll end up actually liking these outlaws.”

Ha. It is way too late for that, G5. You love the Strawhats. No one can escape the roaring event horizon of their charm.

Luffy was totally oblivious to it all. He just laughed and, “What weird Marines.” I mean, come on, G5. Don’t you realise by now that Luffy does not do subtlety?

As they walked to the ship, Zoro suddenly realised Law was tagging along. Usopp whispered in his ear, “Oh yeah, you don’t know. Luffy’s making trouble again.” Poor Zoro. Always the last one to know. xD

A brief flashback of all the major moments in the arc finished it up nicely. Luffy taking that DDM distress call, the fiery dragon, finding Kinemon, discovering Caesar had been drugging innocent kids, Smiley, Luffy declaring he would “kick Caesar’s ass and kidnap him” (best), saving Mocha, Caesar gloating about how well connected and protected he was before the final grizzly magnum smacked him out of the action.

A standard, uplifting ending with dramatic fanfare and Luffy shouting, “SET SAIL!”

But not quite.

For Doflamingo drew nigh...

Law Didn’t Spend Seven Years In Med School To Be Called Traff

The scene when Law chatted to Doflamingo over DDM was probably my favourite across 623-624. It ramped up the stakes and reset the peril level to red alert. Only one might be tied with it.

Doflamingo bounded across the “sky path” (what is that?”) He bemoaned the fact it cut short. “You brats seem to have the devil’s luck.” He spied something floating on a raft below. He found Buffalo and Baby 5′s disembodied heads chained to it. He jumped down for a chat.

It was weird seeing Baby 5 and Buffalo so contrite. They kept declaring how ashamed they were. “I wanna apologise with my death. I was needed and couldn’t help,” etc. Doflamingo didn’t want to kill them. He needed answers.

What Doflamingo didn’t spy was a video DDM. Law’s voice spoke through it.

“What a surprise. I didn’t think the boss would come out himself.”

“Is that you, Law? Long time no see. Couldn’t you have stayed so I could talk to you in person?” At the point, Doflamingo was still supremely confident.

“If you’re looking for Caesar, he’s with me.”

To hammer home the point, Caesar’s wheedling voice cried, “JOKERRRRRR, PLEASE SAVE ME!” (Lol, oh Caesar.)

“Where are Baby 5 and Buffalo’s bodies?”

“That’s not what we’re talking about,” Law said, taking back control of the conversation. “Let’s make a deal.”

“Don’t try to be so tough,” Doflamingo laughed. “A brat shouldn’t try to act like an adult.” (There’s that calling Law a brat again. Plus, Doflamingo tried to take back control of the situation by ignoring Law and pressing his own agenda.) “Where are you right now? You shouldn’t anger me?”

“Anger? Your most important trading partner is Kaidou the Beast. You’re the one who shouldn’t anger him. What do you think would happen if he found out you couldn’t make SMILEs anymore? He’s not a man you can negotiate with. There would be a brutal battle. You would be killed.”

For the first time, the slasher smile was wiped off Doflamingo’s face. Forehead veins began to throb. That had obviously hit a nerve.

“You’re taking this joke too far, Law. What do I have to do for you to give back Caesar? What are your demands?”

And there it was. It definitely hit a nerve because Doflamingo has deigned to negotiate with the brat. Kaidou really must be something if he can intimidate Doflamingo. 

Law’s demand was kind of weird. It must mean something, but I have no idea what yet.

“Give up your Shichibukai post. Throw away everything you have gained these past ten years and return to being a normal pirate. Of course, if you do that, the Admirals will hunt you down. You have until tomorrow morning’s news. If I see you’ve retired from the Shichibukai, I’ll contact you again. If I see nothing, negotiations are over.”

I have no idea why Doflamingo *needs* the Shichibukai position so badly (other than being able to live on Dressrosa, I guess) but Law threatening to take it from him in exchange for Caesar made him M. A. D.

Multiple veins popped.

It was not pretty.

I guess Doflamingo is now on a deadline. Here’s hoping he does not catch up with the Strawhats before they reach Dressrosa. For that is their canon confirmed next destination! They are sailing to meet Doflamingo on his home turf. Foolhardy? Of course! It wouldn’t be the Strawhats otherwise, right?

Meanwhile... Back On Sunny

This was so funny. Chopper fixing up Caesar so he can beat him all over again. Even Sanji said, “What kind of doctor are you?” But Caesar, though. Imagine bitching and moaning, “Oweeee, it hurts!” when you gleefully killed tons of people without a flicker of remorse. You deserve it, Caesar. Suck it up and take the L.

Franky also told the story of how he retrieved Mini Merry Mark II eight times (Franky’s long, luscious hair in bunches was excellent, btw).

While Sunny descended a Sea Slope (dat Oda creativity again), the team gathered round to discuss The Plan.  Zoro, now aware the plan was to take down a Yonkou, was suddenly and enthusiastically on board. Luffy asked if anyone objected and Brook replied, “Does objecting do anything?” (Lol, Brook.)

Sanji reminded Law again with a whisper in his ear that Luffy’s idea of an alliance is different from his. I think this might mean something later, so I am recording every instance of this warning as it’s come up twice now.

Then Sanji called Caesar a weird sheep and smacked him when Caesar said, “You’re all fools. You think you’ll get away with this? You’ve landed yourselves on some major big shots’ wanted lists. I hope you realise your foolishness before you die.”

And Chopper was like, “Oi. No kicking until after I’m done treating him.” xD

Law updated the Strawhats on the situation. Most of the Big Name Pirates of the New World have turf on this sea. This has created a massive criminal syndicate. Everyone is linked with everyone else. The scale of operations is on a completely different scale than the Strawhats have been used to. Deals and trades are done in secret so the don’t attract Marine attention. Law also updated them on Doflamingo’s trading relationship with Kaidou.

I’m not sure but I get the feeling Law is enjoying the prospect of taking down Doflamingo even more than Kaidou. There is history between these two and I cannot wait to find out what it is.

Ahem...

And the scene that is tied with Law threatening Doflamingo over DDM?

Why it’s the scene when Aokiji Showed Up Out Of Nowhere To Kick Doflamingo’s Ass, of course!

While Smoker and his G5 guys stayed behind to rescue any petrified survivors (still a bit salty about that, but I’ll get over it), Doflamingo landed on Punk Hazard like a bomb going off. A single, loose pink feather falling to earth was all the warning they had. Then he hit them with Conqueror’s Haki.

The veins. Oh, the veins. Veins galore criss-crossed that forehead. I counted approximately twenty.

I thought, this guy is out for blood. But he had questions that needed answered first. Doflamingo is not a reckless guy.

“Are they all gone? The tanker’s not here, either. I believe a group of pirates were just here until a minute ago. Where did they go?”

Maybe if he hadn’t opened with Conqueror’s Haki, he would have got some answers. G5 resented the fact he’d attacked them. There was an attempt to fight Doflamingo. An attempt.

With a few twitches of his fingers, Doflamingo took control of their bodies.

“Law could be a problem but Strawhat is just a pirate. Where did you let them run off to?” He turned the G5 against each other, forced friendly-fire massacre style. His pointy shoe stomped a random G5′s chest. “ANSWER ME. What direction did those brats go?”

When the G5 couldn’t answer, they had outlived their usefulness. “Then die.”

Luckily, Smoker smoked into the fray and saved their asses. There was a brief stare off. Doflamingo had a Scary Shiny Glasses moment.

“Smoker, tell me where those brats are.”

This is when Smoker really came through for me. He knew Doflamingo was a corrupt betrayer of the Marines. He played dumb, but could not resist getting a jab in at Doflamingo.

“Who knows? I sure don’t, Joker. They must’ve slipped through our fingers. How can I explain this to our Base Commander, Vergo?”

Smoker made two mistakes. He revealed to Doflamingo that he knows his underworld nickname and hinted he was aware of Vergo’s true allegiance.

Doflamingo’s voice went eerily quiet (I like his VA). “He’s dead, right? It sounds like you know too much.” His hands twitched and he leapt at Smoker.

Does Doflamingo have telekinesis, or something like that? A power that lets him control the movement of others? I’m still not sure what it is. It looked great in the fight, though. Smoker kept getting cut by slashes out of nowhere.

Then, just as Doflamingo sat on Smoker, about to end his existence, a Presence drew up behind him.

“Oh, my. Sorry, little boy. Could you move, please? He’s my friend.”

Holy hype machine, Batman.

You could have knocked me down with a feather. Aokiji, fresh from quitting the Marines, is back in business!

Doflamingo is not having a good day.