Me getting accepted into med school.
I’m going to be a doctor y’all.

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Me getting accepted into med school.
I’m going to be a doctor y’all.

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Overwhelmed
I’m on a constant high of doing more than I can handle. I just interviewed for my fifth job today, which would be 4 to 8 hours a week on top of the 12-15 hours of tutoring/TA-ing I’m already doing weekly. (And don’t get me started on the CPR classes I signed up to teach). Then on top of the research paper I’m working on for publication, I got involved in kickstarting my own research study, in which I have no idea where to start or what to do. My mentor told me to determine a topic by our next meeting, and technically, I was supposed to read over his own research papers he sent me for inspiration by yesterday, but with classes, work, and extracurriculars, I’m overwhelmed. Overall, in addition to academics and work, I’m juggling 8 other extracurriculars (treasurer, newsletter editor, etc.) and the 20-hour clinicals every week.
I shouldn’t complain because I’m doing this to myself. I’m choosing this lifestyle of constant stress and work in general, but I can’t stop. I feel like if I don’t take every opportunity before me, I’m a failure. I’m failing my family who have supported me throughout my whole life and journey. I’m failing God for placing in me in a life where I have so much opportunity that just needs to be capitalized upon. And I’m failing myself for not doing the most out of everything that I have.
Earlier today, actually for the past four hours, I lied down, played around a bit on my phone, and just sat there. I felt, no, feel, so overwhelmed to the point that I don’t even know where to start. By tomorrow, I have to have finished my paper (haven’t started it yet), my notes for three classes (one of which I’m behind two lectures in), and completing my readings for my research topic.
Here’s to a long night ahead, and I want to work on saying “no” to opportunities. When the coordinator sends out the acceptance or rejection letter for the job I interviewed earlier today, I’ll turn it down. I shouldn’t have applied for it in the first place knowing that I most likely wouldn’t be able to handle it, but I’ll have learned my lesson. I need to do well in what I’m already doing before I add on any more work, if at all. For now, learning the most I can during clinicals and maintaining good grades should be my priority. Then research. Then work. Then extracurriculars. Now is the time to do what matters for my future, not the present.
Beautiful +10° day. Went down to the beach and got my entire MCAT study schedule made up for this summer. Only have to write in days that I work.
I’m back!
A lot has happened in my absence from this platform, but I’m back! I’m currently one year into my two-year post-bacc program, and I’m very excited for the journey ahead.
Since my last post, I graduated with my BSN, passed the NCLEX, and started my post-bacc program. I’m currently building my application for medical school, and it’s undoubtedly been tough to juggle class, work, extracurriculars, and self-growth. There’s a lot of things I used to enjoy, but simply don’t have the time for-- reading, running, climbing . . . but as I head into the summer season, I’m looking to better balance myself as an individual and as an applicant for medical school.
I can’t wait to share my journey, and until next time,
J
Off to class. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do but I'm doing my best. Also I'll be live tonight around 10:30pm eastern time at Twitch.tv/roguepryncess if you want to ask me anything about school, why I chose to go back to college to be a doctor, if I liked being a nurse the last 15 years, what it's like, crazy ER stories, life, games or just say hello. #medschool #medstudent #nurse #nursetodoctor #dooneyandbourke #evian #twitch #StreamLife #twitchstreamer #twitchaffiliate #twitchtv #twitchgamer https://www.instagram.com/p/B9B92IUgXtv/?igshid=1ttn66bv1513

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Thank the IT gods for lecture capture. Pulm lecture + pajamas + iced offee in my Darth Vader glass = so much joy.