#not the same

Two guys who met once at a variety show, one took a shine to the other but it never went beyond that. Later, they find each other as leads for a small, experimental production of A GAY STORY, something that the government already hates; the budget is two paperclips and a dream, and the author of the story is a mysterious recluse.

The two guys have a rocky start but soon after, their chemistry is SO strong on and off-camera that even some of the cast and crew believe they might actually have feelings for each other; and not only that, but they seem to have been BORN to play those characters. There's even the funny side-plot of one of them having a big fat crush on the other's *character*, so now Yibo is technically jealous of himself.

And then, then the show becomes an international success, so much so it opens the door for an entire genre. But BAM! Out of nowhere, the actor who played the misunderstood, ostracized, villainized MC finds himself misunderstood, ostracized, and villainized in a very similar way. He even made the same decision of exiling himself from the jianghu/the entertainment industry and did his darnedest to protect the other man's reputation by staying away. The other man was visibly unhappy about it but complied for both their wellbeings.

From a BL fantasy point of view it's like they were Wangxian reincarnated. Doomed to be pulled away by their obligations life after life. But Wangxian had the good ending while Yizhan got the bad one. (And I will die pissed about it bc it was the result of pure bigotry, dare I say some misogyny, and herd mentality).

I can even picture the long-ass graphic novel title: "I fell in love with my co-star in a BL drama and now my character's curse is messing up my real life"

Anyway, she kept being late for work because her OCD would force her to go home and check it was off. And one day her therapist said "Just take it with you. That way, when your OCD says you left it on, it is there with you and you can confirm it's not."

Remembering this makes me wonder if people with OCD now have the same ability to do this with things like their stove. You can't bring the stove with you, but you can record a video of you checking that it's off and then leaving the house. You can record yourself locking your door and watch it if you think you forgot. You can take a photo of your unplugged appliance.

you think you’d know

if something was wrong.

not all at once —

but in the way it sits with you a second too long,

like a feeling that doesn’t leave