its a weird time to be a brown woman with high testosterone lol ppl are saying the most vile shit online and im like, scrolling past hundreds of comments abt the olympics seeing ppl foaming at the mouth to yap abt how "real" women are XYZ. my testosterone was literally higher than a male friend at one point. like. its not rare, pcos is rlly common. and it certainly hasn't made me any stronger, ive been weak as a kitten all my life. i dunno. im just like... woman is feeling more like a category of arbitrary rules than anything else. i was worried abt looking masculine a lot of my life, bc im not white, or white looking, my hair is textured. i think when i was striving to be thin it was a part of that too. and its not something i rlly talked abt with ppl bc the obvious reply would be that its silly. of course i'm a woman, of course i look feminine. but i think that's a cop out, not wanting to acknowledge the reality of what it's like to be someone who isn't "the beauty standard". no matter how pretty i know i am, it still feels like being a woman is only granted to me on terms and condition by other people. and they can take it away, and they're eager to. bleh, anyway its just been on my mind