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headcanons of what dating the CB scientists is like (+ a few bonus characters)
> Hello, my rubber bats and dead-eye dolls! Dell The Hell-Bell here! (Finally went through on my rebrand, forgot abt Tumblr for a while) and today, I'm gonna make up some Headcanons of what dating different Crash Bandicoot scientists (and a few other bonus characters) would be like! Why did I make this? It' was late when I started writing this, I have nothing better to do, and this returning hyperfixation of mine is choking me alive.
> I WOULD LIKE TO MENTION: THESE ARE MY HEADCANONS. THESE ARE NOT CANON TO THE SERIES ITSELF! AND IF YOU DISAGREE WITH MY HEADCANONS, THAT IS FINE. TO EACH THEIR OWN! (also, I am okay with CONSTRUCTIVE criticism). alright, ON WITH THE SHOW! HEADCANONS BELOW THE LINE!!
Dr. Neo Cortex
Oddly enough, he cherishes you rather closely (for what it's worth with him being a narcissist and whatnot...). He'll get you gifts and take you on dates and whatnot, but his favorite pastime is just being around you if he ever loses to Crash. Just you, him, and a nice puzzle or mystery novel to cheer him up
Dating him wasn't always a breeze. At first, he essentially denied liking you, even going out of his way to insult you in such a creative manner with a big vocabulary like his! But alas, his feelings bit him in the butt, essentially. His feelings hit hard like a truck when in private, and it made him rather petty. And irritable! He couldn't stand thinking about you whilst he was plotting!
Eventually, the damn breaks, and he HAD to confess. He did so in a bit of a dramatic manner, having broken into your place rather loudly on a hovercraft, sure... But it was in the name of love! (And your wall getting promptly prepared and paid off by him)
You're the only person who is allowed to say his middle name, let alone his first name. Most people just call him 'Dr. Cortex', or simply just by 'Cortex'. But you get the delight of seeing him dart up to you when you call out 'Neo Periwinkle Cortex'
He is not one for movie dates unless they're mystery or thriller. If he isn't thinking about what the ending could possibly be throughout the entire movie, then it's not all that good to him. (He ESPECIALLY despises IT, Terrifier, or any movie with clowns in it)
Calls you names like 'darling' or 'dearest'. He's endearing with it <3
He'll often end up starting fights, and he'll take a while to cool off. When he does, he shows his concern and endearment for you, and makes it up to you with a date of sorts (once you apologize ofc)
Dr. N. Gin (aka The Character Ever)
Okay, so it all really depends on which version of him you're dating, allow me to explain:
Classic Timeline N. Gin (Crash 1-3 + 4) would not be used to love (and would doubt that you loved him at first), but he tries to make the most of it. He shows you cool things he makes, infodumps to you and teaches about topics he likes, and will take you to different band concerts to whatever rock band you both like. He's also REALLY enthusiastic, and goes around to show you off like 'Hi! :D This is my girl/boy/theyfriend! :D' to whoever is willing to listen.
Radical Entertainment (Crash Of The Titans/Mind Over Mutant/Tag Team Racing) N. Gin? Fucken NUTS. He would be a bit stand-off like at first, refusing to believe that love was not something he needed or even deserved (due to his mistreatment that he's used to). But once he does manage to soften up to you? He clings on, never lets go. Dates are often just you two, and something scientific or violent (like horror movies, I HC that this version of him adores horror films)
Classic N. Gin would talk out through arguments, and often end up apologizing first. He is ELATED if you ever say 'it's okay, I forgive you' or simply just reassure him
RE! N. Gin would start the fights first. He takes a while to cool off as well, but he will forgive you when he feels like he's no longer in a volatile state
Expect a few unique nicknames or pet names relating to machinery or rock bands. He'd call you things like 'dream machine' or 'nexus'. More plain ones he'd use would be 'dear' or 'angel'.
He'd probably adopt a cat. Whether or not this is an aversion or a magnet for a relationship with him is up to you, but he'd definitely like cats.
Dr. N. Brio (aka I CAN't FIND ANY GOOD GIFS OF HIM)
He's sweet, but fairly protective. After all, he didn't want you to go to Cortex at all while you two started dating because he doesn't really like Cortex (I mean, he tried to back-stab the guy a good few times!).
You help him dislike Cortex slightly less, so that's a mess that was averted. (He still despises him though.)
Rarely has time for dates on account of being a scientist, but for the most part, whenever you two do have time for a date, he goes for something simple like coffee or a library date. Nothing too big, nothing too extravagant, just something simple and down to earth
Starts fights first, and will rarely bring them back up. He is one to hold GRUDGES. Although, he will apologize after about thirty minutes or so.
He doesn't really do nicknames or pet names, but he will occasionally call you 'honey' or 'sweetie'.
ok fr though, he's so underrated, I barely see anything of N. Brio though
Not used to physical touch or PDA. He doesn't get uncomfortable, he just doesn't know how to react on account of Not Being Treated Nicely Before (TM), so a silent 'th-thank you, honey' slips from his lips before he ends up going back to whatever he was doing with a new shade of red blush haunting his face
N. Tropy (YES. I AM COUNTING HIM HERE.)
Bing bong buck, consider yourself one lucky fuck
No, seriously, the only time he might consider dating someone other than himself is one rare sort of time, considering that he worked with (spoilers for crash 4 ahead) AN ALTERNATE UNIVERSE VERSION OF HIMSELF TO TRY AND FUCKING DESTROY THE TIMELINE AND REMAKE IT.
So you white-knuckle grip that mf and NEVER let him go.
ok back to being a serious writer, enough joking about
You pray that you do not get flustered easily, because N. Tropy WILL flirt with you whenever he can. He knows that he's got as fuck, and he will use that to toy with you. If you end up blushing and screaming at simply being called 'darling' in that smooth, buttery voice of his? Oh, good LUCK, babe!
He doesn't just fluster you with flirting, no. He has a whole bag of tricks. He'll jokingly be mean to you about something that bothers you just enough to get a reaction, but not enough to be serious. Your height, an interest of yours, how you say something. He likes getting a rise out of you.
Dates are rather extravagant and big. Fancy restaurants and whatnot. What he wouldn't do? Museums. He has the power to time travel! You name a time period and a place, he'd take you there in an instant!
Wouldn't often cause a fight first, but when he does, he'll freeze you in time until he cools off. He'll check in on you and ask 'Are you ready to apologize yet, my love?', and if you end up refusing, then it's another ten minutes for you in time-air jail
Would call you nicknames like 'darling', 'my love', anything that gets a slight fluster out of you and that you're okay with him calling you
And now, my plastic beetles and swarming mice, it's time for the bouns round! where I put all the extra characters that aren't the scientists of the Crash Bandicoot Universe!
Dingodile
Congrats! You get scary guard dog privileges.
He's protective of you. If someone looks at you the wrong way, they will be DEALT WITH. On SIGHT. Someone insults you? Oh look, a hole in the wall shaped like them.
Dates will consist of varying things. One night it's axe throwing and a beer chugging contest, next it's an art gallery visit and star gazing. He does a little bit of both tough and gentle activity.
He WILL cook for you. You may insist on it time and time again, but he'll always cook for you (he does run a diner at the end of Crash 4, after all.) Is it good? That's up to your interpretation of what you think, not the CDC, luv <3
Will rarely start fights. Will apologize after fights, and will even bring you a gift like flowers as an apology if he thinks it got that bad.
Will give you a simple nickname, or usually calls you "sugar", "sweetheart", or something similar
If you guys are cuddling in bed, he 1) snores loudly, and 2) will have you ensnared in his limbs and tail. Good luck getting up to get something to drink, because he is a heavy boi and a heavy sleeper.
Pinstripe Portoroo
You're not just his partner in crime, no. You're now his accomplice. He will not let you out of his sight considering that his work is dangerous, and he doesn't want you getting hurt. Hell, he might even let you in on the crime if he feels like it and if you feel like joining in
Dates are extravagant: dinner, movie, maybe something else like mini golf (he got banned from most shooting ranges on account of him being so damn trigger-happy). Dates are you two doing something big that you both enjoy.
You are the ONLY OTHER PERSON allowed to touch his Tommy gun. He doesn't even let his henchmen touch it, so consider yourself lucky. (And yes, he allows you to put stickers on it if you are a fellow person that puts stickers on things, I understand y'all because I do that shit too)
If he's doing paperwork, he lets you sit in his lap and just pepper his face all over in kisses
Oddly enough, he's a lot more patient with you than anyone else. He often doesn't start fights, and even if he does, he'll end up apologizing once you've cooled off.
He definitely calls you 'doll'. He'll only call you by your actual name when he's either serious or angry at you.
Nitros Oxide
Oh, have fun dating him, because he is kind of a PAIN. If you're not a fellow Gasmoxian, or at least good at racing, he'll deny liking you, and he's gonna be mean about it until his feelings lead to him thinking about you 24/7. And even then, he'd refuse to say anything until you pester him.
He'll brag about you, yeah, but he'd say that you're the best partner and better than anyone else's. He's a sore winner like that.
Dates are varying, depending on mood. A date on a good day is him taking you out racing or showing you different planets he's conquered. On a bad day, where he lost a race or something, expect to comfort him a lot while you two watch a comfort show or film. (just as he is a sore winner, he is also a sore loser)
If a fight were to break out, he wouldn't let up until you either apologize or compliment him. He is very petty like that. It doesn't even matter if he or you started it! He'd also bring up past fights.
He'd call you 'his prized possession', since he won your heart somehow. He might call you 'stupid' affectionately as well, since anyone else who dared to call you stupid had been handled and made a minion on one of his concrete parking lot planets for Gasmoxia. (Rip to whoever insults you, they stuck working minimum wage I guess :sob:)
Also ensares you in his limbs while he's asleep. He also tends to talk in his sleep as well, so get used to it.
Honestly, not much is given to us about Gasmoxian biology, so uh... Good luck with that, I guess?
> Well, that's all for now, my candied worms and ruby skulls! I might make more Headcanons, but as of now, let me know what else you'd want me to HC or write about! (I might even start posting a few fics on here (and maybe on my other account, anonymousegeektrap, for some more spicer fanfics and HCs) Until next time, stay devilish!~
