#niece

No one warns you what it’s like to become an aunt overnight to not one, not two, but four kids at the same time. You think you’re signing up for the occasional birthday party, maybe babysitting once in a while, a cute drawing stuck to your fridge. Instead, you find yourself knee-deep in chaos, laughter, and at least one child trying to eat dog poop. (Yes, really. That happened. And no, I’ll never emotionally recover from it.)

Meet my squad: Claire and Rose, my boyfriend’s sister’s kids, and Mary and John Frank, my boyfriend’s brother’s kids. Together, they are four tiny hurricanes with sticky fingers, big personalities, and an unshakable belief that I’m both their favorite playmate and a grown-up responsible enough to stop them from burning the house down. Spoiler: I am neither.

---

Claire: The Mischief Queen

Claire is what you’d call a hands-on learner. She doesn’t believe in the phrase “don’t touch that.” She believes in experimenting. She once ate dog poop just to see what it tasted like. (For the record, I did not encourage this science experiment, nor do I recommend it.) Another time, she figured out how to turn the stove on all by herself. Nothing says “instant heart attack” like seeing a toddler casually twisting a burner knob while humming to herself like she’s in a Disney movie.

Claire is the definition of a wild child—equal parts mischief and charm, with a will that could bend steel if she set her mind to it. She has this fearless streak that keeps everyone on their toes, whether she’s sneaking snacks like a tiny bandit or testing the laws of gravity by climbing anything taller than she is. Her humor comes naturally—those mischievous grins, the dramatic giggles after pulling off some stunt—and even when she’s driving you half mad, she somehow makes you laugh in the middle of it. Claire doesn’t just live life loudly, she charges at it headfirst, with all the energy of a toddler who has absolutely no intention of slowing down.

---

Rose: The Foodie Comedian

Rose is my spirit animal. This girl has two settings: ignoring everything you say, or eating with such commitment that you wonder if she’s in training for a hot dog–eating contest. She’s the type of kid who, when you tell her “no more snacks,” will look you dead in the eye while simultaneously sneaking goldfish crackers into her mouth.

She’s effortlessly hilarious—the kind of kid who can make you laugh when you’re trying your hardest to be serious. If Claire is chaos, Rose is comedy. She’ll ignore every rule with a straight face, then do something so absurd you can’t help but crack up. How are you supposed to stay stern when the same child who just launched LEGOs across the room is now twirling around the kitchen, holding a granola bar like it’s her microphone and she’s headlining a sold-out show? With Rose, even the mischief comes with a punchline.

---

Mary: The Quiet Genius

Mary is the brains of the operation. She’s sharp, observant, and always watching. You can almost see the gears turning in her head as she calculates the best way to get what she wants. She’s like a tiny CEO with a clipboard. If you tell her no, she won’t throw a tantrum—she’ll circle back in ten minutes with a PowerPoint presentation of why you’re wrong.

Spending time with Mary feels less like babysitting and more like being interviewed for a job you didn’t know you applied for. She’ll just look at you like, “And what qualifies you to be our aunt?” And honestly? She’s not wrong.

Mary also has a way of making you feel like you’re part of her grand plan—even if you’re not sure what that plan actually is. She’ll hand you a toy, give you a look, and suddenly you realize you’ve been drafted into some elaborate scheme she’s orchestrating. She doesn’t just play house; she runs it. And somehow, you’re always reporting to her

---

John Frank: The Thinker

Then there’s John Frank. He’s smart like Mary, but quieter about it. He’s the type of kid who will sit back, let the chaos unfold, and then calmly say something so insightful it makes the adults in the room stop and stare. Like, “Did you know dinosaurs probably had feathers?” And you’re just standing there holding a juice box, wondering why you suddenly feel like you need to go back to school.

John Frank is also the most likely to remind you that kids are always paying attention, even when you think they aren’t. He’ll repeat something you said three weeks ago word-for-word, which is both impressive and terrifying.

John Frank also has this way of observing the world that feels older than his years. He’ll watch everything play out, take it all in, and then drop a thought so perfectly timed it feels like wisdom disguised in a kid’s voice. It’s never loud or showy, just simple and true. Being around him reminds you that sometimes the softest presence can carry the most weight.

---

Me: The Fun Aunt (and the “What Have I Done?” Aunt)

Somehow, in the middle of this four-child circus, I’ve earned the title of fun aunt. I’m the one who sneaks them extra snacks, laughs at the jokes their parents would roll their eyes at, and lets them dance on the couch when we’re supposed to be “winding down.” I’m also the one who gets tackled the second I walk in the door. There’s no such thing as a casual entrance when four kids are sprinting at you like linebackers.

But I’m also the what have I gotten myself into aunt. The one who lies in bed at night wondering how four people under the age of ten managed to completely outsmart me, again. The one who thinks babysitting will be “chill” and then ends up Googling “how to get slime out of hair” at 11 p.m.

It’s a strange balance, being the aunt who wants to say yes to all the fun but also knows that yes sometimes leads to Claire cooking the family dog.

---

The Chaos is the Point

Here’s the thing: as much as I joke about the chaos, the truth is—I wouldn’t trade it. Being an aunt to four wild kids at once is exhausting, hilarious, terrifying, and heart-melting all rolled into one. It’s the sound of giggles echoing through the house, the little arms wrapping around your neck, the sticky kisses you swore you didn’t want but secretly love.

It’s Claire’s mischief, Rose’s laughter, Mary’s sharp questions, and John Frank’s quiet wisdom. It’s being the person who isn’t quite a parent but isn’t just a random adult either. It’s finding out that love can look like holding sticky hands, answering a million “why” questions, and laughing until your stomach hurts because Rose just announced she wants to marry pizza.

Yes, they’re wild. Yes, they’re exhausting. But they’re also four of the best reasons I’ve ever had to show up, to laugh more, and to find joy in the chaos.