Uncertainty
older!natasha x younger!reader
warnings: established relationship, age difference not specified, fem!reader, r is a people pleaser, dom/sub dynamics, r being a bit of a brat, r being overwhelmed but not realizing it, r sucking at communication, lots of praise, soft sex?, dom!nat but then soft!nat, oral (r receiving), fingering (r receiving), sweet aftercare
notes: this took a different turn than I planned, but I guess itâs actually better this way⌠sorry for all the grammar mistakes and other errors, this is not proofread properly. the beginning kinda sucks, but it gets better towards the end I promise!! honestly Iâm so nervous about posting this, I havenât been writing for so long so Iâm hoping that this doesnât totally suck. anyways, enjoy and donât be afraid to leave a comment! My inbox is always open for feedback :)
words: 3,3k
men & minors do not interact please!
Restlessness and anxiety had been bothering you all day long. You couldnât relax properly, couldnât shut down or silence your mind from its constant running. You were constantly fidgeting with the hem of your tank top, tapping your fingers against each other or picking at your fingernails. Natasha was at work for another two hours, and you were all alone in the apartment that felt too big for your spiraling thoughts. You missed her. You missed your girlfriend, even though she had been gone for only a few hours.
Pathetic, you whispered to yourself. You knew you were being too clingy, or at least you thought so. You wanted to text her, just to tell her that you missed her, but you had decided that you wouldnât. You thought you shouldnât bother her while sheâs at work, at least not with something as pathetic as yearning.
After a while, you couldnât help yourself anymore. You decided not to text her that you missed her, but send her a photo instead. A photo of yourself. Naked. Surely she would mind that less than a pathetic âI miss youâ text, right? At least you looked good.
Natasha saw the message immediately. The three small dots appeared in a second on the bottom of the screen, indicating that she was writing an answer to your filthy surprise. The symbol disappeared, then reappeared. Finally, Natasha answered.
From: Nat <3
My coworkers almost saw that, baby.
You smirked and bit your bottom lip, as you typed an answer to her right away.
From: me
Oops, my bad :)Â
Natashaâs reply came almost immediately.Â
From: Nat <3
Are you bored? Do you want to get in trouble?
You couldnât help but giggle. While this wasnât your original plan, though you knew sending a photo would get you in trouble, you didnât mind at all. You decided to play along, as you figured it was more entertaining than to back down and submit.
From: me
I donât know, I could always send another pic?
In a few seconds, the reply came, sending a rush of heat straight down to your core.
From: Nat <3
Donât bother. Iâm leaving in 10, you better keep your fingers off of your pussy or youâre in trouble.
And then, another message right after that.
From: Nat <3
Wait for me on the bed. And donât put any clothes on, since you seem to love being naked around the house anyway.
Your lower stomach tingled with anticipation, and you could already feel your pussy clenching, even though Natasha wasnât home yet. But she would be soon, and you knew you were in trouble.Â
-
In a few minutes, you were sitting on the bed naked, legs crossed neatly as if that would make you look more innocent. You were feeling even more restless than before, and the anticipation of what was coming didnât help at all, it only made things worse. You wanted to open your legs and touch yourself, but you knew Natasha would find out. And when sheâd find out, you wouldnât be coming for the rest of the day. As enticing as the thrill of it sounded, you didnât want to be deprived of an orgasm just because you couldnât wait.
Your mind cleared the second you heard the front door click. Natasha was home.Â
You clenched your thighs together and pressed your sweaty palms against the mattress. Now you had to be good, if you still wanted this to go your way. Still, you could feel the doubting thoughts filling up your mind. Surely she wouldnât be too mad, right? You werenât sure if you should be regretting your decision to bother her with that photo. She didnât sound like she was mad, just being dominant, right?
You waited for Natasha, as the older woman was taking her sweet time. She knew youâd be there waiting for her, and she didnât want to make this too easy for you. Eventually, you could hear the sound of her footsteps outside the bedroom door. Natasha entered the room, still wearing her work clothes, those damn pants that hugged her thighs and waist perfectly, and the white blouse that made her look way too hot.
Her eyes found yours immediately, as she walked over to you slowly. She stopped in front of you, and motioned for you to stand up with her finger.Â
âStand up,â she ordered simply, her voice low and commanding. You complied instantly, all defiance draining out of you. You expected to feel the need to submit to her, and you did, but not like you wanted to. Instead of the hazy subspace creeping in slowly, insecure thoughts filled your mind instantly, and before you even realized you were doubting everything about yourself. Was I too much? You thought to yourself. Is she actually annoyed with me? You wanted to submit to her, to be good. You couldnât afford to be bad, you had to be perfect.
You stood there in front of her, completely naked and bare under her gaze. Natashaâs eyes were glued to your bare body, her lips turned into a smirk. Natasha sat down on the bed, and pulled you a little closer to her.
âGod⌠Arenât you a pretty little thing..?â she mumbled, her voice slow and deep. Your mind was already too far gone to answer properly, so you just nodded brainlessly.
âYou look so pretty for me like thatâŚâ Natashaâs hand slid up to your cheek, stroking it softly with her calloused fingertips. For a moment, her eyes looked almost soft, as they admired your flushed face. But then, the same dominance from before found its place in her eyes, and she pointed to the floor in front of her with her finger. âNow kneel.â
Your body reacted before your mind could even comprehend the command. You sank to the floor on your knees, settling between her legs. You looked up at her, seeking for her praise like it was the only thing that mattered now. You needed to hear her praise you, to reassure you, but you couldn't say it out loud. You tried to push your own feelings down, so you could only focus on being good for Natasha. Thatâs what you wanted, right?
âGood girl⌠I knew you could obey if you wanted to. Now, do you think youâve been good enough that youâll get to cum today?â she asked, clearly expecting an answer from you. You blinked for a moment and tried to gather your thoughts to form a coherent sentence, but your brain got stuck on the words âgood enoughâ.Â
Natasha slipped two fingers under your chin, lifting your gaze up to meet hers. Her eyes softened again for a moment, as they searched yours for signs of discomfort. Natasha had noticed the hazy look in your eyes, the way your mind seemed foggy and unclear. She stroked your cheek with the pad of her thumb softly, and you couldnât do anything else than stare at her mindlessly. You couldnât figure out what she was thinking. You couldnât really figure out anything, as your mind was too crowded with your insecurities and doubts. You just wanted to be good.
âYou good, pretty girl?â she asked, tapping your cheek gently to get your full attention. You blinked and forced your mind to clear up, but it was hard. You were already teetering on the edge of your mind, trying to fight the overwhelming whirlwind of your thoughts.
You bit your lip for a second to get yourself grounded into this moment. You nodded quickly, not trusting your voice. Natashaâs gaze assessed you, and she shook her head a little. Panic flared in your eyes for a tiny moment. She wasnât pleased with you? Did you do something wrong? Were you not-
âY/n, baby, look at me. Words, love. Use your words, donât just nod at me,â Natasha corrected, her thumb still drawing slow circles on your cheek.
You blushed, and felt a small relief flood in. You opened your mouth, but you couldnât get any words out. You didnât know what to say, or even how to do it. Despite the relief, your mind was stuck on being afraid of failing her.
Natashaâs eyes softened even more, as she heard a soft whimper leave your mouth. You looked down, and felt all of your emotions crash down on you. You felt pathetic, like you were a disappointment. You covered your face with your hands, as the first tear rolled down on your cheek. The only thing you could think was that you failed her, that you failed to be good for her.
âOh devochka⌠Come here baby, come hereâŚ,â Natasha murmured softly, and soon you felt her arms wrapping around you. She pulled you up gently, and you went with her, and climbed to her lap. Natasha gathered your body into her arms, and gently pushed your head down so your cheek was pressed against her chest and her chin rested on top of your head. Her hands started stroking your back in slow circles, as she held you close.
âItâs okay baby.. Youâre okay love, you didnât do anything wrong,â she whispered into your ear, and pressed a soft kiss on the top of your head.
âI-Iâm sorry..,â you managed to whisper, as you nuzzled your face closer to her chest, seeking comfort in her warmth.
âMoya lyubovâ.. You have nothing to apologise for⌠It was just too much, was it?â Natasha asked, and you felt another gentle kiss on top of your head.
âNo it.. I mean y-yeah I guess a bit but-â you rambled, but Natasha silenced you with a soft hush.
âBaby, you know you can say if it is too much, right? I want you to talk to me, not hide your feelings,â she said. You nodded a little against her chest, and pressed even closer to her. Natashaâs grip around your frame tightened, making you feel safer in her embrace.
âIâm not mad at you, dorogoy.. I know itâs hard for you, but we really need to work on this, okay baby? I need to know how youâre feeling, because your feelings matter just as much as mine,â she said, and you could only nod in agreement.Â
After a long while, Natasha tucked two fingers under your chin and gently lifted your head up, so she could look you in the eye. Your eyes were slightly glassy, but you werenât crying anymore. You looked back at her, and didnât try to avoid her gaze, even though it made you feel exposed and vulnerable.Â
âI want you to tell me what you want right now, okay baby? Please, just the first thing that comes into your mind. What do you need now, love?â Natasha asked. Her thumbs started drawing slow circles on both of your cheeks again.Â
âI um..,â you started, still unsure of what to say. âI want you.. I need you,â you finished the sentence with a little more confidence.
âYou have me, love. Youâll always have me,â Natasha said with a small smile, and pressed a kiss on your forehead. âDo you want me to make you feel good, or do you want me to just hold you like this?â she asked, knowing that it was easier if she led you on.
âI think.. I think I want to continue. I want you to make me feel good but.. But I want you to feel good too and-â you started rambling again, but Natasha pressed her finger against your lips and silenced you.
âNo baby, donât think about me now. I will make you feel good, but tonight is only about you now, okay?â Natasha decided. Her words werenât exactly a question, and you should have just nodded, but you couldnât.Â
âBut I should-â you tried to argue, but Natashaâs warning look silenced you before her actions could.Â
âMilaya devochka⌠What did I say? Tell me,â Natasha commanded, but her voice didnât carry any harsh authority.Â
You looked down at your hands for a second, but then lifted your gaze back up. âThat tonight is about me..,â you mumbled. Natasha smiled softly, and patted your cheek gently.Â
âGood girl⌠Please donât argue with me on this, okay?â she asked, and you gave her a quick nod.
Natasha took your face into her hands properly, and pressed her lips softly against yours. You found yourself kissing back instantly. Your hands travelled up on her body and looped behind her neck. Your hips inched closer to her, and Natashaâs hands found their way down on your bare thighs. She pulled away from the kiss, only to grip your thighs and maneuver your body so that you were now sitting in her lap, straddling her.Â
Natashaâs hands stroked your thighs softly, making you shiver. You blushed slightly as you realized that you were already completely naked, while she was still fully clothed. Your hands moved to the collar of her blouse, and you tugged on it softly.Â
âYou want my shirt off, baby?â Natasha asked with an amused smile playing on her lips. You nodded quickly at her question.
âGo on baby, you can take it off,â she encouraged with a soft smile that worked like magic to boost your confidence. As soon as she lifted her arms up, you hurried to grip the hem of her shirt, and in a blink of an eye her shirt had found its way on the floor. You slid your hands on Natashaâs sides, and glanced at her chest, as if asking for permission to take her bra off. Natasha quickly understood what you were indicating, and nodded, granting you permission.
Your hands moved quickly to remove her bra, and soon her upper body was completely bare, just like yours.Â
âGood girl,â Natasha praised gently, and slid her hands to your waist. A small squeak left your mouth as Natasha flipped you down on your back against the mattress. She smirked a little and straddled your waist. You looked up at her with hazy eyes, but this time the cloudy feeling creeping into your brain wasnât insecurity or doubt. Instead, it was the comforting feeling of knowing that you were safe with your girlfriend.
Natasha leaned down to kiss you again. Your lips found hers quickly and your hands moved to her back, desperately pulling her closer. Your hips bucked up and you let out a small, soft whine into the kiss. Natasha chuckled softly and pulled away from the kiss, her face hovering just an inch away from yours.
âPatience, malenâkaya lyubovâ,â she reminded you gently. âYouâll get what you want.â
âYour pants,â you mumbled quietly, trying to request her to undress completely. The small amused smile found its way back to Natashaâs face, and she sat up, moving her hands to the waistband of her pants. Without saying a word, Natasha pulled her pants and panties off, knowing that you wanted her to be completely naked too.
As soon as the last item of clothing fell down on the floor, Natashaâs lips were against yours again. Your hands gripped her back again, and you bucked your hips up again, only to be met with Natashaâs palm pressing your lower body back down against the mattress.Â
Before you could protest, Natasha slid her hand between your thighs. She pushed your legs open, murmuring small praises under her breath and between kisses. You felt her hand slide upwards on your inner thigh, until you felt her fingers sliding in between your folds, making you let out a soft sigh. Natashaâs lips moved to your neck, and she started planting gentle kisses in all the places she knew you loved the most, Right behind your ear, your jawline, and then down to your collarbone.Â
Her fingers spread your folds before gently slipping one into your clenching pussy. You closed your eyes and let out a soft moan, as Natasha started moving her finger slowly, letting you get used to it without overwhelming you. Your mouth fell open slightly, and soon you didnât bother to suppress your sounds at all.Â
âThatâs it⌠Good girl, moya khoroshaya devochka,â she murmured against your neck, before she slid a second finger into you. Your pussy clenched around her fingers, desperately needing more. Natasha picked up the pace a little, while still being extremely gentle.Â
Her mouth moved down to your chest, as she planted slow and gentle kisses between your breasts. Natasha kept moving downwards, until her lips met your lower stomach. She pulled her fingers out of you slowly, earning a small, desperate whine from you.Â
âOh youâre being so good for me baby⌠Just let go, let go for me,â Natasha murmured, before nudging your inner thighs with her nose, pushing them wider apart. As soon as her mouth made contact with your cunt, a needy moan spilled out from your mouth.
âYouâre such a good girl for me now,â she murmured against your heat. Her tongue found your clit quickly, and by that time, you were already trembling. Natasha held your thighs open with one hand, while the other crept up and found your breast. She brushed her fingertips over your hardened nipple, earning another loud moan from you. You arched your back and tried to clench your thighs, but Natashaâs strong hand kept them open.Â
Whimpers and moans came out of your mouth, as Natashaâs tongue played with your clit, drawing you closer and closer to the final release. Her fingertips circled your nipple at the same time, making you lose every last coherent thought you had.
âNat- I-Iâm gonna..,â you whined out weakly.Â
âThatâs it, let go for me baby⌠Come for me milaya,â Natasha murmured softly against your core. Her tongue pressed against your clit, making you arch your back and let out a loud moan. Finally, your orgasm washed over you, making your thighs tremble. Your eyes were closed, your breathing was heavy, and your body fell limp as soon as the last waves of your release had passed.
âSuch a good girl for me,â Natasha praised, while pressing soft kisses on your inner thigh. Your body was completely limp against the mattress. Your mind was foggy and cloudy, but in the best way this time. There was no insecurity or doubt, only the feeling of belonging to Natasha, and being safe with her.
Natasha moved to lay down beside you, and before you had a chance to react, she pulled your exhausted body into her arms. You let yourself be dragged into her embrace. Natashaâs arms wrapped around you, and she guided your head to rest against her chest with your cheek pressed right against her breasts, just the way you liked.
âMy sweet girl⌠You did so good baby,â Natasha mumbled while pressing gentle kisses into your hair. You managed to respond with a small hum, as you closed your eyes and let yourself relax. Your head felt pleasantly fuzzy, the only thoughts being the safety and warmth of Natasha and her praise.
âWe should get you cleaned up a little,â Natasha suggested, but you just shook your head against her chest.Â
âNo⌠Stay,â you demanded tiredly. Natasha chuckled affectionately, and started petting your hair in slow motions.
âOkay baby, not yet. Weâll just stay right here,â she promised. Her arms tightened around your relaxed frame, and you felt another kiss being pressed into your hair. You nuzzled your face closer against her chest, earning a soft sigh out of her.
âYouâre my perfect girl, you know that?â she praised you, but you were barely even comprehending that anymore. Your mind had slipped into the comfortable cloudiness, and it was only a matter of time before youâd fall asleep.Â
âI love you so much, moya milaya devochka..,â you heard Natasha murmur into your hair, before the weight of exhaustion pulled you into sleep.
















