This is a call out post for all those fuckass bards and sorcerers that dare to besmirch the name of Necromancer by taking it for themselves. You aren’t fucking slick and you aren’t one of us.
Let me break this down for the people who don’t know. Lately, there’s been a surge of “Necromancer’s” in my local area lately, and the average Jane doesn’t see anything different from what I do because “they have skeleton servants too, Necromancer B! They must be!” WRONG!!!!!
Bards and sorcerers have this lame ass spell called Animate Objects. And unfortunately for the actual hard working necromancer community, they disrespect our precious bones by just animating skeletons for short durations of time. Already several new startups have taken skeleton jobs from my skeleton blue collar workers. How are they supposed to help enforce to the local community that I’m a good necromancer with ZERO evil schemes now????
And that’s not even the worst of it. I’ve heard from a fellow colleague in Fresno that a fucking ARTIFICER makes their homonculi look like skeletons! And the civilians don’t know the difference because the item that is their heart is just another bone.
It’s so stupid. Nobody knows the actual hard work we Necromancer’s put day and night into our craft. These fuckers are just moving down bones and calling it necromancy. Bah! They don’t feel the soul of the bones you are using, they don’t get a skeleton warrior with flair, or a minimum personality that doesn’t interfere(much) with the morally grey missions you send them on. I bet they don’t even polish the bones they are misusing. I bet they don’t even know they have to make sure to continue supplementing the bones they use with calcium lest they crack and break after several months of use. I’ve already filed several complains to the local bonesbureau, and I’m still waiting on their response.
