#nealdash

Not the healthiest relationship, but somehow have ended up soulmates. No one else can tolerate them for that long except for each other anyways

will get into ridiculous physical altercations (Dash tries to shoulder check him, Neil trips him, he grabs his hand and pulls him down with him, get stuck in a slidey mess on the floor, proceed to make out)

Neil is a naturally greasy guy but his suit is also just covered in lube and it gets in his hair. Dash complains but he does love washing his hair

also loves painting his nails, picking out outfits for date night, doing his makeup for funsies. Neal is a low maintenance guy, but he will keep the nail polish and if anyone asks he’ll really proudly be like “thanks, my boyfriend did it!”

Dash takes so long getting ready in the morning and at night that any sense of bathroom privacy has disappeared. Neal will just stroll in to do his business while Dash is on minute 45 of his everything shower.

Neal actually has really good skin somehow, Dash is baffled considering Neal’s… everything. Will make jealous comments every time he has to do his nightly routine and Neal has been in bed for half an hour already

Neal good-naturedly teases him but he also thinks it’s really cute to watch. He’ll just gaze at him primping in the mirror like *lovey dovey sigh*

Dash looks like shit when he sleeps tho. Curlers, sleepmask, lipmask, earplugs. If you’ve ever seen a cartoon old lady in her curlers and negligee snoring away, that’s him.

Will do stupid Team Rocket-esque dialogue if paired together on a mission

Neal always makes lots of innuendos, which Dash doesn’t always pick up on. If he does, he’ll stomp on Neal’s foot, but it’s worth it to see his cute blush (and sometimes reap the rewards)

Also the sheer amount of lube Neal owns certainly facilitates a lot more than thievery

Dash gets jealous SO easily. He won’t tell Neal tho, he’ll insult or sabotage whoever he perceives as flirting w his bf and/or give him the cold shoulder until Neal forces him to tell him what’s wrong. He thinks it’s cute, if a little inconvenient. He liked that barista!

Neal isn’t really jealous or at least not very conscious of it. Sometimes he’ll be snippy or harsher in a fight and be like “gosh why am in such a nasty mood today? Definitely unrelated to the fact that this guy tried touching my boyfriend!”

Not great at communication, Dash tends to clam up and hold grudges, and Neal often misses things Dash would perceive as slights. Somehow they always end up in a big blow up argument that ends in fucking and all their friends/co-workers are like “seriously, again?”

Both Neal and Dash are slightly underweight. Neal has a crazy metabolism and Dash is a former model working for Cleo. That means that Neal always has something unhealthy to eat while Dash grimaces at his greasy burger and orders a Caesar salad with no croutons. Will bitch at Neal for stealing his yogurts.

Neal does worry a little about his eating habits. It’s a good thing they have such large funds, bc Neal will buy every variety of vaguely healthy snack to tempt his bf into having a little something something

Neal’s idea of dressing up is black jeans instead of blue. Dash nearly passed out seeing that on a formal date, dragged him back inside, and re-dressed him.

“I bought these pants for a wedding! I’m not wearing wedding pants to dinner.” “You will if it’s /my/ dinner.”

Dash is always buying Neal clothing items, but makes sure they’re comfy and stretchy. Sometimes will even tailor make his own if there’s nothing on the market that suits his needs. Neal still goes around in his stupid teeshirts, but at least he has nice clothes for date nights and events

Dating Neal has relaxed Dash a little. He no longer does a full routine to just longer around the house, he’s less insanely high strung about his stuff, and slightly less bitchy to other people (not too much less, nothing could truly change that).

Dating Dash has made Neal more perceptive of other people’s feelings, considering how sensitive he can be. Still silly and often obnoxious, but backs off quicker and respects boundaries a little better (I don’t think he’s good at personal space)

Speaking of, Neal is so touchy. He’s always got an arm around Dash’s shoulders, holding his hand, leaning against him, gently poking him or tousling his hair, any excuse to touch him. Dash complains, especially when Neal’s in the slip suit or is messing with his look, but he secretly loves it. In private, he’s a cuddle bug and will pout like a bitch if Neal won’t hold him (he doesn’t need to pout, Neal always will)

know really obscure details about each other. Dash can be kinda stupid, but then he’ll randomly be like “ugh don’t touch that, it’s got that nasty fur texture you don’t like” and Neal’s like “how’d you know that, I never told you I don’t like beaver fur?”

Dash is the physically weaker of the two, less strong, less agile, less athletic. His fighting is basically all long distance, unless he’s truly cornered.

Neal is obviously an up close fighter. His suit basically only has traction on the palms and the soles, and he packs quite a punch. He’s also limber as hell, obviously.

Dash would consider himself the brains (and the beauty) out of the two. He knows all sorts of random shit about high society and the arts, as well as lockpicking, forging signatures, tailoring, some engineering (his hat was originally built for him but he’s since learned how to deconstruct, rebuild, and fix it on his own), etc

Neal is also smart, but he’s not a high society dude. He’s better at the sciences, as well as general street smarts. (Dash isn’t an idiot here, but he’s been in Cleo’s world for so long he’s forgotten a lot from his dirty past). He can also do some basic hacking, and takes care of the teams computer stuff. He can read blueprints, but he can’t understand why anybody would want to duck tape a banana to a wall?

Neal has mild EDS, so he can do all that crazy shit including bending and even dislocating his joints to slip in and out of places. It doesn’t feel great, but he’s a pretty chill guy and hasn’t let it slow him down yet (even if these damn bruises won’t go away!). Loves a nice warm bath after a mission (usually with Dash washing his hair :p)

Neal’s one concession to skincare is sunscreen. He is so incredibly pasty and his skin is so sensitive, he slathers that shit on whenever he’s in a sunny place. Dash will insult him for looking like a walking corpse, but it’s better than dealing with a whiny sunburned Neal.