sorry for the lack of a new fic y’all…rant below the cut…
this goddamn end of summer melancholy is hitting so so so hard it’s crazy. school coming up is fucking with me heavy and it’s literally all because of the classes i have to take.
every time i think about it i really start to spiral out. i’m beyond scared of just falling on my ass and failing all the people who believe in me and wasting my parents money and ruining my whole entire future even though that sounds SO dramatic but it’s literally my reality right now lmao
i’m just trying to remind myself that being in the dorms and going to my cute little art club and getting back into a nice routine will make it all better, and i DO know that’ll help but i’m still just AAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!
and my sleep schedule definitely isn’t helping how i’ve been feeling…like at all. i know i joke about it all the time but it’s genuinely so debilitating and such a problem that i feel like i’ll never get the chance to permanently fix. it’s even worse considering how i’ve really gotten my act together about it recently, and that isn’t even helping. i’ve finally been going to sleep at a reasonable time for the past few days and all it does is turn me into a zombie as soon as the clock hits six pm and my body just shuts down without my permission.
i’m completely useless and dead on my fucking feet, like i barely even eat dinner when i’m home cause i’m just way too tired to even be hungry. and i love dinner. but i DON’T HAVE THE ENERGY FOR IT. it’s so frustrating. i don’t sleep, i feel like shit. i get some good sleep, i feel like shit. what the fuck is that? it’s not fair.
anyway let me shut up and go to bed because OF COURSE i have to wake up early as fucking balls tomorrow :))))))))
girls are meant to suffer ig
