#nant

Before I get started I was very hesitant to post this one because it’s not as upbeat as my last & I really struggled with how to say what I wanted. This is just my interpretation and it was written without an ounce of sleep so if I missed anything…

We got two scenes for the pairing this time (I need more PromNont) and imma talk about both…

Starting with the pool scene, Nont is finally home having not received any good news but Prom is there to console him as promised - that man is addicted to a back hug and Nont’s shoulder like nobody’s business. It starts off well but for some reason Prom decides to tell Nont that he too cared for Nant. How aftercare was just aftercare for Nant but the best time for him & how there were times he thought Nant may have cared for him too. This of course is the total opposite of when he said that he has no feelings for Nant, that he was simply protective because of their contract. By the time he gets to talking about it wanting to see the video & theorizing that Nant may still be alive, Nont is clearly uncomfortable with just how far the conversation has shifted.

Even though I’ve spoken about Nant being a ghost between them - it wasn’t until the pool scene that I actually became conscious of the fact that the times Nont reinforced that he isn’t Nant has been an ongoing conversation with Prom since his reveal of being a twin - its typically a response to something Prom has said or done and not just a way to erect a wall.

Prom getting jealous / Prom pushing for aftercare / Prom asking him to stay

From Nonts perspective, Prom doing these things is just him using him as a replacement at best or trying to transition him into being Nant at worst, making the “I’m not Nant '' reinforcement necessary. Ever since their first confrontation where Nont accused Prom of having feelings for his twin and told him not to cross the line with him because he is not Nant, they’ve been dancing around the topic. Now there’s a real possibility that Nant is alive and could come home and the things that weren't allowed to be said are being said, there's no more skirting around it. Believing something, thinking it, is totally different from that person saying and confirming it. It makes it real, makes it more painful.

Nant’s existence feels like it eclipse everything because everything around Nont feels like his twin’s. He had to become his twin, he’s living his choices, he’s surrounded by his friends, he’s engaging with his lovers (some more than others) . His value feels tied to being Nant’s twin. When Prom was silently professing a desire to die at the concept of loss - who was that confession really for? As Nont speaks of classic love triangles he’s overtly speaking on Prom / Nant / Nuth & covertly of his own messy relationship with his missing twin’s lover that resides in that shadow as well.

By the time he gets the reactions of the Baddies he’s done. He’s decided there’s no benefit in finding a brother who doesn’t seem to want to be found, a brother he feels he doesn’t even know anymore.

——

The second scene opens up with Nont seducing Prom - uninhibited, bold, & wanton. Like usual Prom seems adept at reading Nont’s mood, everything about him says trouble before he even utters a word.

And when he does it’s to tell Prom to have sex with him like he’s Nant, how it’s written in the contract. Nont’s ever constant, “I’m not Nant” becomes “I’m Nant.” However it’s not a response to the will of Prom, instead it’s an ultimatum, almost a challenge and maybe on some levels even a punishment. He tells Prom that if he has sex with him like he’s Nant he’ll continue to look for his twin. Even when Prom doesn’t respond at first they both know it’s a yes. In fact there’s no verbalized response from Prom at all, instead he wraps his arms Nont’s neck and goes to pull him in but Nont pulls back, letting Proms hands slide down his body. It’s clear from the start of this scene til the end of it who is the dominant of the moment, who’s the one with the power.

It’s interesting, Nont started off seductively & then tempting - almost coaxing Prom to go along. But he escalates to an intensity rather quickly. A part of me wonders if he secretly wanted to leave his mark on Prom’s memories of Nant…

Somehow Prom has agreed to allow himself to be bound, blind folded and at the mercy of Nont’s hands. I cannot decide if he is silly, desperate, or very trusting. Maybe a bit of all three considering we saw Nont admit to being drunk.

A lot of people heard Nont say, “ Have sex with me like I’m Nant’ but me - I heard him say, “Fuck me like I matter”. Because essentially, I believe that was a big part of it. Yes, there is a bit of anger, bitterness, resentment - which ever word fits best to you - wrapped into this moment but ultimately he wants to feel special, important, cared for. There’s a desire l to lose himself not only in the sex itself but in returning to being the person so many around him seem to yearn for, including Prom, most certainly Prom.

Afterwards they rest with Prom at the head of the bed his feet resting on Nont’s stomach as he lays across the bed. I can’t say if this small bit of physical connection is done consciously or subconsciously. It’s obvious that neither is in a good head space, they’re not in the normal aftercare position Prom seems to favor & when Prom finally ask what Nont’s plans were for finding Nant, Nont responds that Prom must miss Nant badly. Though he may have won the last battle between them, clearly he’s not over it.

This episode seemed to be a step forward for the majority of the pairings, confirmations, confessions, apologies and forgiveness. It was also a shift for Prom & Nont’s…relationship, although I wouldn’t call it a positive one. Like I was getting at in he post, Prom & Nont have a consistent back and forth that typically goes the exact same way every time however this was the first episode we saw either of them deviate & it created a snowball of a mess that leaves neither of them satisfied by the end.

Nuth, nope.

I echo @ppeonppeonhan post, and don't trust Nuth AT ALL anymore. I was willing to trust him. I really was. And a small part of me still is.... But. There's something wrong.

Not only in his stories, but above all, in how he portrays Nant.

Let's look at the facts i gathered in between breaks and working hours:

Who all had flashbacks with Nant or contact with him?

Soong (when he raped and attacked Nant),

Teena (when he saved Nant from Soong),

Jump (got a bj from Nant, more on that later),

Prom (of course),

The baddie bunch (Zouey, Captain, Porsche, First)

and Nuth

Did I forget anyone? I don't think so.

So, because I am insufferable, let's go through these flashbacks and pay attention to how Nant is described.