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Sometimes when I @ another user I like to go one character at a time and see how many characters deep I need to go before the little autosuggestion popup is narrowed down to a single possible result. It's not always what you'd expect – there are some very oddball username stems that are weirdly well-represented.
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Organising my recently downloaded indie tabletop RPG manuals/playtests/etc. is always fun because it's like:
10 000 SWORDS AGAINST HEAVEN
FULL-METAL SPIRITS GODSMASH
THIS MACHINE HAS MEAT IN IT
THE THUNDER IN OUR HEARTS
SCHISM: THE NEW FLESH
Wet Grandpa
Things to have named after yourself in ascending order of prestige:
Building
Park
Geographic feature
Day
Incident
I was scrolling through the List of Latinised Names for a lark and some of these you wouldn't belive:
Alexander Agricola was born Alexander Ackerman
Hieronymus Bosch was born Jheronimus (Jeroen) van Aken
Confucius was born Kong Fuzi
Nicolaus Copernicus was born Niklas Koppernigk
Desiderius Erasmus was born Gerrit Gerritszoon
Georgius Macropedius was born Joris van Lanckvelt
Gerardus Mercator was born Geert de Kremer
Paracelcus was born Philip von Hohenheim
Some of these are clearly professions translated to Latin (Kremer, Ackerman) and others simply substitute each syllable with the closest Latin equivalent (Kong Fuzi, Koppernigk) and add -us. Then the boldest ones simply invent a name entirely unrelated to their birth name, and honestly, I respect the hustle. I would also be inclined to change my name if I was named Gerrit Gerritszoon, but I don't think I would have the balls to pull off calling myself Desiderius Erasmus, which is not only an insane glow-up but a xianxia-protagonist-level name in its own right. He's literally called "the desired one" in both his first and last names! And we still know his name today, so he went and lived up to it. Name someone who did it better than him.
Yes, all of the characters in this serialised web novel are named after alcoholic beverages, but, like, they're alcoholic beverages nobody outside of France has ever heard of, so it's classy.
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One of my problematic beliefs is that it's not that hard to pick a username that's available most places while only using dashes and underscores to fudge it. But you can use numbers if you can give those numbers aura or otherwise commit to the bit. One of my partners has been using a name with the same numbers in it on every website for nearly a decade and I think if you have that commitment then it's fine.
Thinking about Lake Koocanusa and I really think we should start pronouncing ‘U.S.A.’ as ‘OO-sa’ because it sounds so much cooler, but I’m not American, so I have no authority to implement this change 🫤
