#nakajima

boyfriend!atsushi who thinks he's too much.

he apologizes for everything — for taking up space, for needing comfort, for existing. you've lost count of how many times he's said "sorry" in one conversation. but you don't get annoyed. you just say "stop apologizing for being human" and hold his hand. he doesn't know what to do with that. he's learning.

boyfriend!atsushi who gets quiet when he's overwhelmed.

he doesn't lash out. he doesn't yell. he just goes quiet — smaller, like he's trying to disappear. you don't push him to talk. you just sit beside him. sometimes you read out loud. sometimes you just sit in silence. he always thanks you afterward, voice barely above a whisper.

boyfriend!atsushi who loves when you play with his hair.

he never asks for it. but if you run your fingers through his hair, he melts. his eyes flutter shut. his whole body relaxes. he falls asleep like that more often than he'd admit. if you stop, he unconsciously leans toward your hand, chasing the warmth.

boyfriend!atsushi who writes you clumsy love notes.

he's not good with words out loud, so he writes them down instead. short notes left on your pillow, on the counter, tucked into your bag. they're always messy, a little awkward, and full of crossed-out words. you've kept every single one. he doesn't know that. you'll tell him someday.

boyfriend!atsushi who gets jealous quietly.

he doesn't get angry — he just gets quiet. he watches you talk to someone else and shrinks into himself, like he's already losing you. you always notice. you always find him afterward and hold his hand. he doesn't say anything. he just holds on tighter.

boyfriend!atsushi who doesn't think he's worth staying for.

he tells you this sometimes — not dramatically, just quietly, like he's stating a fact. "you could do better," he says. you look at him and say, "i don't want better. i want you." he doesn't know what to say to that. he just holds you closer and tries to believe it.

boyfriend!atsushi who loves you in the quietest way possible.

he's not loud about it. he doesn't make grand gestures. but he remembers the way you take your coffee. he buys you snacks you mentioned once. he walks on the outside of the sidewalk to keep you safe. he loves you like it's the only thing he knows how to do.

boyfriend!atsushi who finally says "i love you" like it's a secret.

he says it late at night, when he thinks you're asleep. it's soft, barely a whisper, like he's afraid of how much it means. you pretend not to hear. but you hold his hand a little tighter. he feels it. he smiles — just a little — and falls asleep with his forehead pressed to yours.

boyfriend!atsushi who apologizes for taking up space in your life.

he says it quietly, like he's confessing something shameful. "i'm sorry i'm always in your way." you look at him and say, "you're not in my way. you're in my life. there's a difference." he doesn't know what to say. he just holds your hand and doesn't let go.

boyfriend!atsushi who doesn't know how to ask for what he wants.

he never says "i want to hold you" or "i want you to stay." he just hovers nearby, waiting. hoping you'll notice. you always do. you open your arms, and he's there in a second, like he was just waiting for permission to exist in your space.

boyfriend!atsushi who still expects you to leave.

he catches himself thinking it sometimes — that one day you'll wake up and realize you could do better. he doesn't tell you this. he just savors every moment with you, like it might be the last. you notice. you stay a little longer. you hold him a little tighter.

boyfriend!atsushi who lets himself be soft with you.

he doesn't realize he's doing it at first. he just knows that when he's with you, his shoulders drop. his voice gets quieter. he laughs easier. you don't tell him. you just let him be soft — because he deserves to be.

boyfriend!atsushi who finally learns that love doesn't hurt.

he used to think love was something you survived. something that left marks. but with you, it's different. you don't hurt him. you don't leave. you just stay — steady, gentle, real. and one day, he realizes: this is what it's supposed to feel like.

A/N. a special gift for my lovely @ver2xq and for anyone who wants to give him the love he deserves. hope you guys enjoyed!! cred to @ithemes for the div ₍^. .^₎⟆