2, 13, 20 for the deep writer asks!
Once again I was OMFG EVILMOUSE SENT ME AN ASK!!! CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT???? Sent my friend a message and we’re fangirling together 😂 😂 😂 sorry, not sorry 🙃
Well, done with fangirling (not actually), onto the questions!!!
2. what’s a fic that took you to an emotional/dark/hard place?
I write for many many fandoms. So I think more than one fic drove me to dark/hard places. I’ll mention 2 here. But it’s for very different reasons. One of them is called Lord of Ice, a Lokane (leave me and my crackships alone 😂) story that I’ve only written one chapter, but I liked this chapter SO MUCH that everything I wrote after that seemed lacking. It drove me to a desperate point in which I couldn’t write for ANY fandom at all. And everything I wrote seemed so bad that I got a severe writer’s block that took me almost one year to recover from. That’s when I got started with this account here and the Star Wars stories ♥️
And the other fic is for the Bleach fandom, called Illusion of You. I got this one started on 2020 for the Wattys. Of course I couldn’t finish, and so far I’ve 70k written and I got 1/3 of the story done 🙃. But this story drives me to places sometimes it’s difficult to keep writing. While I use a cheerful character as my protagonist (even though she’s one of the most violent backgrounds in Bleach) the themes are sad and quite dark. Each chapter I write makes me hate capitalism even sometimes myself for making the characters suffer so much. My friend says that each chapter of IOY is like a “painful punch in the pit of the stomach”. But at the same time I’m quite proud of this story because I think if a cyberpunk/sci-fi story doesn’t make you nauseous/angry something is wrong.
So both stories drove me to dark/hard places. One that made it too difficult for me to keep writing for a while, because I thought I wasn’t good enough and the other because of its themes.
13. Do you take pride in your writing, or does it embarrass you? Why?
Yeah. You could say, yeah… I usually don’t say that I write to everyone but that’s because as a Elementary teacher I think that would be embarrassing, yes, to have my kid’s parents or my coworkers reading my kinktober stories. But that’s not because I’m ashamed of writing them or I’m embarrassed of my writing… it’s just to avoid awkward situations.
Can’t have a meeting with one parent that while I say his kids misbehaved they’ll be thinking I wrote a chapter with DP kink with Thrawn and Arihnda (ESPECIALLY when some of them like Star Wars).
20. What’s the greatest gift you’ve gotten from your writing?
Friends. Definitely. I made friends that are with me for more than 10 years. Friends I love very much. I think engaging in fandom can give us many unforgettable moments and people.
Besides that, it made my English improve A LOT. When I decided to write in English because almost no one in Brazil wrote for the ships I liked, my English was horrible. Now it’s so much better. I owe it all to fanfic and fandom.
Thanks for the ask, darling! I had a blast answering it and reliving some moments here 😂