#moron4moron

rating: E, no archive warnings apply

word count: 14,752

pairing: steddie, background rovickie

some additional tags (more on ao3, just the basics): post-s4, friends to lovers, idiots in love, bisexual steve, bisexual eddie, bisexual awakenings, pool table sex, homoerotic wrestling, fluff & smut, 5 + 1 things fic

snippet below the cut <3

Tagged by the amazing @just-my-latest-hyperfixation last week, sending a tag straight back at you for this week

"Stephen, darling, light of my life, my knight in shining armour." Eddie's voice croons from the study.

"What have you done?" Steve rolls his eyes, head popping through the doorway to find Eddie perching on Mr Harrington's very expensive mahogany desk.

Eddie gasps dramatically.

"How dare you! I resent the accusation that I could have ever possibly caused a problem in m-"

"Yeah yeah Munson," Steve interrupts, knowing from experience how long Eddie could go on when left to it, "what's wrong?"

"There's a spider."

"What?" Steve slowly steps back out into the hallway.

"A spider."

"Well get rid of it then."

"I can't get rid of it," Eddie whines, voice getting gradually higher, hands flapping around as he tries to maintain balance, "the doctor said no strenuous exercise."

"For the last time, that was two years ago Eds." Steve scoffs, still staying an arms length away from the study.

"Still, aren't you meant to help me in my time of need?"

"Well I'm not getting rid of it, it's your spider."

"My... I- that... wha- it's not my spider it's an intruder! an interloper within my sanctuary. A threat to my health in a space I thought I was safe." Eddie slips slightly, sending a stack of important looking documents to the floor.

"Call Robin." Eddie demands, and points at the phone mounted on the wall.

At the back of the study.

"I'm not calling Robin, we'll never hear the end if it."

The two stand and stare at one a other, caught at an impasse.

"It could be poisonous." Eddie suggests.

"We don't get poisonous spiders." Steve says condfidently, his arms crossed, but he backs further from the door nonetheless.

"Are you sure?"

"...No?"

Something crawls over Steve's foot.

"Fuck fuck FUCK! Call Robin!" Steve yells as he dives into the room, clambering up to join Eddie.

@myslashyvalentine gift for aprilmoon08

No archive warning applied Mature M/M Beta by Bluebeholder

Middle-Earth was changing faster than Erestor had ever seen, watching the coronation of little Estel, no longer little or young, a man grown marrying their Evenstar; it was a bittersweet event, if it was for him as a family friend, the counselor of Imladris he didn’t want to approach the twin’s pain, and no surprise that the day they left Minas Tirith Elrond announced his departure from these shores. Despite the turmoil of a rapid readjusting world his mind was mostly fixated on the same thing, or more like elf.

Clingy was a characteristic he had grown used to from his friend when he was severely wounded, a thing that tend to last a few days, that he had come to accept, even enjoy how silly the great hero could get, child-like. After the spider poison for over a month he had dealt with a side of Glorfindel never seen before, frightened anger, admit only to himself how very wrecking it had been to face it, the relief when after the One Ring was destroyed he got to see the Golden Lord back to his clingy-ill self.

However it had lasted weeks, only when they left Mirkwood’s trees Glorfindel had relent, but for the first time his friend had not gone back to normal self, the ride to Gondor he had thought much of it, probably the shift on the Song that the other could hear and almost see in ways beyond his understanding made the blond jumpy and distracted. But one of the last night in the great city of man his friend had found him, all seriousness and unease, stroke a conversation he couldn’t comprehend. The commonly eloquent and sharp Balrog Slayer was talking in circles, incomplete phrases, stumbling on his own ideas; there were concepts of time, and longing, things unseen, things unsaid, none that made sense. He had been a good sport not dismissing Glorfindel as he will normally do, only telling him he had no idea what was he trying to say on that existential ramble; the blond gave him a stare of disbelief before leaving with an apology of tiredness.

They had made the journey to Lothlórien’s borders and all the way home, and his friend remain absentminded, jittery, overall bizarre. Preparing Elrond’s departure had the household in a uproar, triplicating his work that got constantly interrupted by Glorfindel’s behaviour. Most of the time the Tree-light-eyes didn’t loss any of his movements, irritating and completely new; he haded call the blond out after some weeks back to Rivendell. Another existential conversation started, again incoherent disjointed words that he had to cut declaring himself confuse, that conversation he recall with puncturing clarity.

“Ah… words are not at my service of late.”

“An understatement” it was so strange to see Glorfindel making himself smaller, so lost of speech and palpable frustration “Think of another path, start again.”

A smile came to him at the suggestion, it was an old one his Lord had use to teach him to organize his mind when he was still an elfing, too much of a sharp tongue and mind to not get jumble from time to time. His friend answer much as he may have done back then, throwing something out in a dash “Love”, he had an arched eyebrow staring to the ocean blue eyes, that look back at him as waiting for something.

“New path then… what about love?” from nowhere language was hard to vocalize, there was a tinge of queasy on his stomach, as if something had crawl below his skin; increasing with the fixated offbeat stare, the same that had been following him as a Hawk to a prey the previous weeks.

“Do you love someone?” uncomfortable was not a sentiment he associate to Glorfindel’s presence, but the question was making it so, to the point there was a grimace on his face “Is just that… you see, after the poison wound I came to realize that someone I have call a friend for thousands of years is actually, well… the one I love.”

Probably a few seconds, not even a minute, but it felt eternal the silence after the declaration; his guts clench in the most painful way, a cold slide through his veins, foreign and confusing “Oh, that is what you meant about things not said, not seen.”

“Indeed, for so long I have been a blind buffoon, now I am trying to grasp how to reach him.”

Far too many layers adding one against the other, not only Glorfindel was admitting to be in love with someone, but also that it was of another ellon, which was enough to make him loose balance, and then his friend’s eyes were measuring him “A nér?”

“Are you censuring me?” there was no easy comeback, the alarmed tone on his voice was stilling ringing within.

“You have chastise me for my affairs with other ellyn in the past, how I am not to be surprised?”

“Ah well…. It had made things…. complex for me.”

The blue pools were still expecting, like taking size of every minuscule thing he did “Is that why you kept asking if was I ‘understanding you’?”

“Hmm.” He wanted to run away, escape the scrutiny, cry or yell maybe, not sure why but it was pressing on his soul. “Sharp as ever…so, can you understand me? Do you love someone?”