Comfort within | Seo Moon-jo x reader
Summary: Seo Moon-jo always has his eyes on you.
Warnings: stalking, self-harm, angst, Moon-jo showing his love in his own way, reader has scars, killing, violence, comfort, cannibalism.
Note: idk if i like thisđ
The dark hallway of the dormitory looked endless, a light flickering just enough so you could make out which door is yours. You despise this place. The creepy neighbours, the creepy lady at the front desk- everything here.
But the more you stayed there, the more you found comfort in the eeriness of the place. Most of your life you felt like no-one noticed you, those weird human eyes never on you, always on someone but never you.
But here, you felt the glares. In your small strange room, that you never really got used to, on your way out, on your way in. Always someoneâs eyes were on you.
You found comfort in that. But you never cared enough to investigate who was it, until the tall mysterious man introduced himself to you. You didnât see him often, but he always struck a conversation with you.
And from that moment you knew those glares werenât from the pervert guy, not from the deranged twins or the sweet guy whose door was across from yours â it was Seo Moon-joâs.
You never felt normal, you felt like you didnât belong. Your thoughts were always dark, horrendous. You felt like every wrong move from a person could send you crazy, like you wanted to slit their throat and fish out their insides.
You could never find the beauty in life everybody always romanticises and glamorises. Life wasnât at all what people say it is.
But on the outside you presented yourself as a normal human being, a smile on your face, which was almost never genuine. You work a job as a secretary, almost making ends meet, since your company is going out of business.
You had friends, but were they really your friends? They only care about your presence when they need it, want it. You were someone they could brag about something, when their other colleagues called in sick and didnât want to be alone â you were it.
You didnât want to live like this â you wanted to die. Self inflicted or not, you wanted to feel alive and your thoughts made it seem like that is the only way.
Moon-jo noticed you right away, he could sense you, he could feel you. He didnât need to make you deranged because deep down he knew you were just like him, just not accepting it.
You currently were running late to work, bag over your shoulder as you walked out of your room, looking down at your phone. You bumped into something, or someone. You looked up to see Moon-jo, your neighbour.
He wore a black long sleeve shirt, his hands shoved in his pockets as he towered you. âOh Iâm so sorryâ you apologised. âItâs no big dealâ he smiled at you, dark eyes darting down at you.
Neither of you moved, standing in silence. As you realised you were already running late, you started to panic a little. He noticed your distress, âdo you need a ride?â he asked, not breaking eye contact.
You felt uneasy by his glare, tugging your shirt further down as you felt a burning sensation. âNo, but thank you,â you continued âI donât want to disturb or anythingâ you explained.
âI insist, letâs goâ he reassured you, stepping out of the way and motioning for you to get going.
As you both were leaving, you waved at the old lady at the reception table trying to be polite as Moon-jo just smiled at her. He was a gentleman, opening the door for you.
As he unlocked his car door you were kind of surprised, his cat seemed way too fancy to be living in a residence like that. âWhere to?â he turned his head to look at you as you buckled your belt.
âThe beauty salon near the shopping mallâ you replied as the car started moving âAh, I work close to itâ he explained, gripping the wheel as his veins were now on show. âAt the dental clinic near.â
Truth to be told, he already knew where you worked. He always watched you.
âIsnât that beauty salon is closing soon?â he spoke up as he watched the road. âUhm yeahâ you awkwardly replied, also looking at the road. âAre you looking for any jobs at the moment?â he asked, but he knew.
He snooped in your room countless of times and you always left your laptop on the table, tabs open for job applications. âYeah, but no luck as if for now.â you explained to him in a quiet voice.
âI could arrange you a spot at my clinicâ he smiled at you. You couldnât understand why was he being so nice to you. âThat would be so kind of you, I have a couple years experience as a secretary,â you trailed off âif you need one I could definitely helpâ
âWe actually need one, what a coincidence.â They donât actually need one, but Moon-jo didnât care.
He parked his car right outside of the building, turning to you and smiling. âThank you so much, I owe you oneâ you said as you stepped out the car and waved a goodbye at him.
The rest of the day you couldnât stop thinking about him. You couldnât read him easily nor understand why he offered to drive you.
The work day ended fast and now you were walking home, feet cramping. As you passed a convenience store a flash of Moon-jos face appeared in your vision. You were confused for a moment but just shrugged it off. You felt those eyes on you once again.
The next couple days were rough, the stress has been getting to you, you have been getting call after call from your father and mother arguing with you for no reason. Work has been shit. Not to mention you knew someone was watching you, you saw his face everywhere.
âWhy couldnât you be fucking normal like your siblings?â your father spat to you over the phone, you could hear how drunk he was. âIf youâre going to call me just to say all that then donât call at allâ you said as you hung up, trying to be as quiet as you could to not get any neighbours mad.
If you didnât go out now, you were sure you would take the nearest sharp object you could find and do something you shouldnât. The day was mess, and this was the final straw.
It was already pretty late and quickly grabbing your shoes you opened the door and started walking to the exit. But as you were close to stepping out, the creep was standing in his door way, the pornography showing from his room.
He had a knife in his hand. You couldnât deal with this now. âWhat the fuck is you looking at?â you barked, enraged. âYou should be quieter if youâre talking with someoneâ he said calmly, looking down at your tank top.
âYeah or what? Stab me?â you asked him, stepping closer to the knife as it was now pressed up against your stomach but not quite close to draw blood. âDo itâ you couldâve sworn you heard someone say that, but it wasnât him nor you, nor your mind. You wanted to grab the knife from him and cut his throat clean, but you tried to stay calm.
Suddenly a hand wrapped around your shoulders, hand gripping you. âBabe calm downâ the man said, it was Moon-jo.
âWhat are you doing out here with a knife, youâre scaring the ladyâ he said to the creep as he now looked down. âGo to your roomâ he said as the door closed in front of you.
He turned to you, his arm never leaving your skin. âYou okay?â he asked with a smile. âYeah, sorry for thatâ you said.
âWhere you going so late?â he asked with concern? or maybe curiosity? you couldnât tell. âFor a walkâ you replied quickly as he was now looking straight into your eyes.
âItâs not safe to go alone, let me come with youâ he asked and you couldnât refuse to him, maybe some company wouldnât be that bad.âYeah okayâ
At first it was awkward, but it turned out nice. You were now both sitting on a random bench, beer in your hands that he got for both of you, even if you insisted on buying it since you still owed him for the ride.
You did regret not putting on a sweater before leaving your room, your scars full on display for everyone to see. You felt vulnerable. Moon-jo was nice enough to not mention them even though you saw those glances he threw at you.
âAre you working tomorrow? I can show you around my clinic and you can sign all the paperwork and everythingâ he said, taking a sip and looking at you. âSure, that sounds nice,â âare you sure Iâm not a bother though?â you asked, feeling kind of guilty.
âNo, no, donât worry about it, babeâ the nickname slid past his lips as he smiled at you. He was giving off an eerie aura, just like the residence itself but you couldnât deny that comfort washed over you as you spoke to him, watched him carefully.
You knew he watched you carefully as well, or were you just going crazy? Were those awful whispers you heard just your mind playing with you? Telling you to strangle the bitch at work, or the man that harshly bumped into you on purpose. They started a while ago so obviously it wasnât connected to him, was it?
The next day you spent with Moon-jo, going to his clinic to fill out the paper work, then your current job, stating you were leaving. He walked with you everywhere, he was by your side everywhere you went.
Those jealous glares from your coworkers driving you crazy. At one point you heard them whispering âWhy is he with her?â âWhat a whoreâ You felt furious, like you could jump them right here right now. âDo itâ you heard the whisper once again.
As you were signing the last papers, the whispering didnât stop. âLadies do we have a problem?â Moon-jo asked standing beside you. âYou know itâs rude to speak like thatâ he said, face changing into an expression you couldnât quite place. Thatâs when they finally stopped talking.
When you were now leaving, you looked back at the women sitting, throwing them a dirty look as the tall man opened the door for you.
Once you sat in his car you felt relieved. âI fucking hate that placeâ you whispered, accidentally saying it out loud. âYou shouldâve told them how you feel, they donât deserve you there either way.â
You didnât know how to reply, no one usually said things like that to you. âCome on youâre probably hungry, letâs go to the residenceâ he hummed, as you buckled your belt.
You were now sitting at the dining table in the shared kitchen, as Moon-jo pulled out a box of fresh meat and 2 cans of some kind of drink. He sat down across you, opening the box. You stared at his slender hands, he could easily choke you with them. It would probably feel nice, wouldnât it?
âItâs rude to stare, babeâ he laughed when you zoomed back in, chopsticks held out to you. âSorryâ you said and took them into your grasp.
âHere, try this its so goodâ he said as he picked up a piece with his own chopsticks, bringing it to your mouth. The meat tasted weird, but in a good way. It wasnât beef nor pork or any type of meet you couldnât tell what was it.
âHmmâ âItâs goodâ you said chewing it, looking at him as he popped a can open and handed it to you. âWhat meat is this?â you took another bite with your own cutlery now. âItâs human meat.â he smiled and slowly put it in his mouth, smiling.
Huh? Was he joking? You smiled at him. âWell it still tastes so goodâ you joked back, or maybe you didnât, you donât know yourself at this point. You took a sip of the drink, washing the meat down.
âIâm gladâ the man across you said, opening his own drink. He looked so painfully beautiful, you couldnât help but stare. âIâm going out of town for couple of days, maybe you want to do something together after Iâm back?â he spoke up, silencing the comfortable silence.
âYeah of courseâ you smiled at him.
Moon-jo has been out on a business trip, and you are losing your mind in this place. The whispering stopped, now theyâre in your head, youâre sure. The faint screaming you heard at night also stopped. Has it always been him?
Your neighbours been annoying you more and more, your father has been screaming at you for nothing. You felt like youâre about to snap. Do something real bad.
Without Moon-jo you couldnât find comfort anywhere. Without his glares. You stopped eating, falling back into an old habit. Heâs been gone for only 4 days. You couldnât understand why did he have such an effect on you.
Itâs 2am now and youâre walking in an alley, trying to calm down and clear your head but itâs not working. Everything pisses you off. You had your hand in your sweatpants pocket, clutching a hand knife you had. You had to have protection, didnât you?
The final snap came when a girl passed you. You couldnât forget her filthy face. In school she used to bully you with no remote, she made your life a living hell back in the day.
You turned your head back when you heard her laughing. You had to speak up now, for your younger self. âGot a problem?â you snapped as she stopped in her tracks.
âY/n!â she put on a fake face. You look down on her, glaring at her slutty outfit, did she just left a club?
âyou havenât changed one bitâ she said, at this point looking kind of scared. She looked at you too, noticing how pale you looked, cheekbones showing more than usual. You looked scary.
âYeah?â you came closer to her, cornering her into a wall. âMove away you bitchâ she barked, the alcohol smell coming from her mouth.
âOh no, noâ you felt hot from how angry you were, you had to take it out on someone soon.
âAll those years, you didnât move away from meâ now the knife is out, pressed up against her bare stomach.
âAll the laughing, all the jokes, all the commentsâ you continued as her gaze was now filled with horror.
âYeah you deserved it, freakâ âLook at you, you have no respect for yourselfâ she said, face coming closed to yours as she looked down at your arm. âYou cut yourself for attention too, you never stopped, did you?â
âShut upâ you gritted your teeth. âWhatever act you got now, it wonât work on meâ she said, trying to move you away. âDo it.â the whisper, or the voice said. You couldnât bother to tell them apart now.
The blade finally punctured her stomach, straight to her liver. She gasped as she squeezed your shoulders. You couldnât stop now, tears flowing down your cheeks. You stabbed her once, twice and the third time came.
By that point she didnât resist, she couldnât even scream. As her eyes lost the life they had in them just a couple minutes ago, you slit her throat. Blood was everywhere, on your hands, on your face, just everywhere.
You slid down the wall beside her, now lifeless, body you fully broke down. You looked at your bare arm, full of scars. You werenât worth living this life.
You place the blade on your forearm, placing a cut after cut. It felt nice, like you were alive. You didnât even realise how numb you felt until you felt the burning, your blood mixing with the dry one.
âBabe?â you flinched at the voice. Moon-jo? He was now on the ground with you, hugging you tight. It wasnât a voice in your head, it wqs his. He made you snap.
âHow can you even acknowledge me?â you cried, âIâm disgusting, I just killed someone!â you continued as he gripped you tighter. âLook at me, my skin is sickeningâ you flashed him your wrists, blood gushing. Maybe dying in his arms wouldnât be so bad.
âBabe youâre beautiful, thereâs nothing wrong with you, look at meâ he said as he pulled up his black sleeve, scars just like yours.
âIâm proud of youâ he said motioning to the corpse next to you. âIâm not going to let you die here, donât worryâ he continued to comfort you, as you lost consciousness. You couldnât see but he was smiling hard.
