#mmwb

if my blorbos gonna be happy they have to earn it. preferably through 5 abstract suicide attempts, 100 dissociative episodes, at least 10 instances of snapping at their loved ones and immediately feeling like a bad person for it, hating themself so bad they accidentally create another version of themself thats everything they despise and go on a arc of first trying to cut it out to then learning to accept it as part of them, moral ocd,

ink mk: yep. were terrible and we need to accept this before everyone abandons us so that it hurts less. Im Helping mk: we deserve to die . ink mk: hey wait a minute hey wait hey do you wanna talk about it

consider mk doing so fucking bad mks shadow (inky/ink mk. is it schizophrenia is it plurality is it magic? who knows) starts looking like the reasonable one. this is the plot of a fic i am currently writing. his shadow is like Youre terrible and evil and everyone will abandon you and mk is like youre right actually im gonna kms and his shadow is like wait dont do that,. wheres your unending optimism cmonnn cmonnnnn

i think my realest mk moment in this fic is after hes done something terrible to himself in the name of Trying To Be A Good Person, its immediately followed with (after a cut) "Okay. So that didn't work." and then he proceeds to not think about it. mk will be having the worst day of his life and he just has 2 get up after like ok. anyway. and doesnt tell anyone or think about it or anything

mk vc Yeah so i kind of feel like whoever "mk" was died at some point and im just an afterimage left behind which is really troubling because i dont know who to be except mk and there also isnt anyone else id Want to be but despite these things it keeps feeling like im failing at it so i just watch as how i think im supposed to be and how i actually act grows farther and farther apart and so does my ability to reconcile those things with each other. anyway. I found a cool bug today :)

mk dissociative disorder