#ml hcs

You could still feel the warmth in the air; a pleasant exhaustion weighed heavily on your limbs as you rested on the vampire’s bed. You could still feel the tingling sensation of his lips caressing every inch of your skin, the weight of his body pressed against yours, and how his cold skin had warmed up due to that moment. For a few hours, you hadn’t been able to form any other thought that would take you out of the experience. 

You had participated in the flirting game at Moondance with him; once again, you had found yourself seduced by the handsome man’s smooth talk and charisma. Dancing together, enjoying the kisses, the closeness and the tension — it was something that always stirred you up inside, but you knew you couldn’t link it to anything eternal with him.

But you’d also seen him dance like that and kiss girls in a way that made them feel special.

Maybe he was an eternal being, but his sexual connections were fleeting. And right now you felt like you were nothing more than a source of energy for him; you remembered how his pupils dilated as he undressed you, how he smiled as if he were looking at the most tempting dish in the world.

But what if that was all it was? What if you were just a dish?

Many times, during your lonely nights, you thought about the other women with whom he was feeding his lust, about how his mind would completely forget the intimacy you shared that, for you, is not so fleeting. You had undressed in front of him, you had allowed him to explore every inch of your body and admire it as if he were a believer standing before a sculpture of his Goddess. But those lips were constantly kissing other skins. 

The silence and darkness of your room —created by the curtains blocking out the sunny outdoors— gave way to the noise of your thoughts, which were robbing you of sleep and replacing it with a restlessness you were already used to. Your clothes lay scattered on the floor, carelessly tossed about. You felt the weight of his arm around your waist, wrapped firmly around you, preventing you from escaping. You felt the warmth of his breath brush against the skin of your neck, something you were also used to. It was a very intimate and close situation, but one that could easily be faked; after all, Beliath was an expert at making you believe his lies to take advantage of you. He was a succubus.

The stillness of the moment was interrupted by a gesture from Beliath. The hand resting on your abdomen began to move slowly upward, leaving a warm trail on your bare skin. His fingers slid along the soft curve of your breasts, while he replaced the warmth of his breath on your neck with that of his lips. So this is all he wants, you thought, closing your eyes and pretending to be asleep.

His hand rested in the hollow between your breasts, with no movement suggesting any intention beyond closeness. Don’t get my hopes up like this, please.

“What are you thinking about?” he murmured, his voice so soft that there was no trace of mockery or his usual flirtation. 

“Nothing,” you replied, your voice just as quiet. “I thought you were sleeping.”

“Your heart is beating so loudly that it’s impossible to get any sleep,” he replied, brushing the tip of his nose against the skin at the nape of your neck. “Something’s wrong with you to be like this. Didn’t you enjoy our time together?”

“Yes, I always do,” you nodded, opening your eyes and staring blankly at some corner of the room. Both of you felt the urge to say more, creating an expectant silence. 

“It doesn’t look like it,” he replied, his hand sliding down to rest once again on your abdomen. “Turn around, princess. Look at me,” he murmured, loosening his grip so you could turn. You did so hesitantly, meeting his green eyes, which glowed faintly in the darkness. You didn’t see the gaze of a predator this time, nor that of a mere lover. “What’s wrong with you? And be honest.”

“Nothing, really… it’s dumb,” you looked away, a little embarrassed for overthinking things. Even though you had every reason to overthink things about him, and you still didn’t know if it was true or not. Beliath let out a quiet chuckle, shaking his head.

“The fact that you’re trying to lie to me strikes me as… funny,” he remarked, stroking your cheek. “It’s not dumb if it’s affecting you this much.”

A brief silence fell, during which you took the opportunity to communicate with your eyes, looking at him with a fragility that seemed on the verge of breaking. Beliath didn’t seem to be judging you; on the contrary, he was doing his best to understand your feelings. His thumb traced gentle caresses across the skin of your cheek, like a comforting gesture meant to relax you a little.

“I don’t know if I should talk about it,” you said, a slight tremor in your voice, your hand reaching for his and then pulling it away; you didn’t want any distractions. 

“You have to talk about it,” he shrugged, “do you really think you’re going to solve anything by letting this problem eat you? On the contrary, it’s only going to get bigger, and you’ll end up feeling worse by yourself.”

“I don’t know, Beliath… do you always think about the feelings of your meals before you eat them? No, you’re hungry and you just think about nourishing yourself, about savoring them… and then, you probably won’t even remember them,” you said in a melancholy tone, watching as your hand held his wrist with a certain weakness. “If you’re hungry, there are more prey out there. There are more… women who can replace me.”

“Excuse me?” he blurted out with a small, incredulous laugh, but he obviously didn’t find the situation funny.

“Yes, Beliath. I know your game. Today it’s me here, tomorrow it’ll be someone else. Or the day after tomorrow — it doesn’t matter. This bed will still be just as dirty, and you… you’ll keep seeing them all the same way,” you looked at the sheets you were lying on, and a wave of anxiety made you tremble. 

The thought turned your stomach: how many people had been between those sheets? How many people had slept in the very spot where you were lying right now?  “And who knows… maybe you’re thinking of someone else while you’re making love to me.”

You’d already opened the bottle. Now there was no turning back.

“Damn it, I’ve even seen you at Moondance looking at other girls the same way you look at me, and you swear I’m different. How many girls have you told that so you could sleep with them?” You felt the words pouring out of you, leaving you breathless, tightening your chest. Your hands were shaking and your vision blurred a little. “Sometimes I feel stupid, believing that I’m important to you and… and that any of this means anything to you. Maybe… I really am stupid, treating myself like an object all the time just to feel that you love me, even if it’s just a little. Fuck! It’s embarrassing how much I’ve stopped loving myself just to seek your affection.”

You saw his brow furrow for a second, not in anger, but in surprise and denial.

Your breathing was ragged, tears welling up in the corners of your eyes. You stared at him with a frown, waiting for a reaction from him. However, Beliath merely sighed. His gaze drifted to a random spot in the room.

The atmosphere was uncomfortable and thick with tension, making you want to grab your things and run out of there, never to see him again. Beliath, with a slight gesture, tucked a few strands of hair behind his ear.

“Wow,” he sighed, his head tilting back until it rested on the pillow. His gaze seemed completely lost in his thoughts; you didn’t even know if he had heard you. It was the first time in a long time that you had seen him without immediate answers to the situation he was facing. You wished he would be more expressive, that he would get angry or show guilt.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to…”

“Don’t apologize,” you heard his firmer voice, “I understand why you doubt me, but that doesn’t make it true.”

“What do you mean?” you asked, wiping away the small tears that were beginning to fall from your eyes.

“Well, I understand why you’d doubt me. I’ve been doing what you said for centuries: seducing, taking advantage, and leaving people behind without commitment,” he replied in a quiet tone. “But I’m changing that. I’m changing it for us.”

“For us?” You felt your heart begin to race. He turned his head to look at you. 

Silence returned for a few seconds of doubt and contemplation.

“Yeah, for us,” he nodded. It was obvious that even he found it strange to say that. “I don’t want you to ever think I’d replace you with someone else again. I may have been a jerk for many years, but ever since this… what we have… started, I’ve stopped.”

“No… you didn’t stop. When we started having these encounters… you were still seeing other people,” just mentioning it broke your heart.

“At the very beginning, I won’t deny that,” you saw his hand reach out to take yours. “But what I will tell you is that for a while now, if not months, you’ve been the only one. And not just in a sexual sense,” his eyes remained fixed on you, but he wasn’t impatient for an immediate answer either. “You’re the only one I’m looking for, the only one I want to see when I wake up, and the only one whose feelings matter to me more than anything.”

There came a point where you couldn’t hold back your sobs any longer and you broke down. You wanted to believe him, but you were so scared that you didn’t know if he was doing it to silence you or to confess his feelings.

“I… don’t know,” you whispered, letting your tears flow freely. “Every time we go to Moondance, I see how they look at you, how they seem to want to come closer and give you… something better than I can give you.” A bitter laugh escaped your lips after you said that.

Beliath shook his head and squeezed your hand.

“You give me more than anyone else ever has, and I wouldn’t want anything else,” his free hand moved toward your face to wipe away the tears that were streaming down so defiantly. “I was scared of what I felt for you, because it was the first time I’d ever worried about losing someone,” you noticed his hand trembling slightly, “every time I look at you I feel something strange, but I love feeling that. It’s beautiful and intense.”

You looked at him in disbelief at the way he was speaking. You had heard Beliath say all sorts of things over the time, and usually with a single purpose in mind. But you had never heard him speak this way. 

In a more impulsive gesture than he could control, he pulled you against his chest, holding you tightly in his arms.

“I don’t want to lose you,” he murmured. For the first time, he showed himself as someone vulnerable, rather than the facade he always put on to make a good impression. Little by little, you let yourself go and hugged him back, melting into the warmth and comfort of his body. 

“Neither do I,” you whispered, a small smile beginning to appear at the corners of your lips. 

“I love you,” he whispered, his hands caressing your skin as if you were the most precious thing he owned. These caresses eased the doubts and fears that had crept into your mind over the past few days. Clearly, the insecurities weren’t going to disappear completely.

But now everything felt purer. Everything felt better.