#mixed vegetables

the lyrics to this song feel really personal but the emotions they're covering are extremely relatable, i took the liberty of doing some whiteout poetry with them in this one to illustrate how i listen to them. also including some extras just cuz the process of making this had some good little photo combos in it. i read river's edge last year and took some photos of the text that captivated me, the afterword really stuck with me and i felt like "no hope for anything" by drauve(where this track is from) fits well as a companion piece to it. would highly recommend both, very influential pieces of art to me.

as for my health im doing okay-ish, just very tired and frazzled and shakey from waking up with a seizure. been feeling severe isolation, desolation, depression and suicidal ideation and DID shit. concurrently also goin thru some big life changes, alot of social loss and substance withdrawals to boot. idk this album has been helping just not feel too lonely in feeling like a hopeless beautiful tragedy. also this is me trying to try and represent a quiet complete and total isolated breakdown when you have no one you can turn to.

Blood Meridian by Cormac McCarthy 4.5/10 Bad vibe to start the year, my mistake. After pretty prose and exposition on the beautiful and terrible west, he decided to add plot at the very end. Coulda not.

Phantom and Rook by Aelina Isaacs 10/10 Incredibly diverse and beautiful, cozy yet emotional story with magic and found family and love and self discovery. Big big big ups.

Flipped for Murder by Maddie Day 7/10 My sister got me the 10th book in this series by accident, so I got the first few for myself for fun. And they ARE fun. Cozy diner murder mysteries, such a vibe.

The Complete Stories of Flannery O’Connor 8/10 Short stories that point out the darker truths of human hearts, with no mercy for the reader. No goofs here, super cool, super ahead of its time.

Curves for Days by Laura Moher 6.5/10 A fun little romance read about a plus sized girl. As a big booty girl, I love the representation, but the story was sorta ehhhhhhh.

Mixed Vegetables Vol 1 by Ayumi Komura 5.5/10 Sushi chef girl meets pastry chef boy, but they argue too much to realize they’re falling for each other. Cute, but moves too slow, even for a day-in-the-life story. 

Small Favors by Erin A. Craig 8.5/10 A bit freaky, a bit romantic, nearly-fantastical retelling of Rumplestilskin. Icky, but in a satisfyingly gruesome kinda way.

House of Sky and Breath by Sarah J. Maas 8/10 Far longer than it needed to be, and the main character went off page for a bit, which I don’t love. But the world is still really interesting and I love to hate on the random smutty bits.

The Westing Game by Ellen Raskin 10/10 I love a fun puzzle story, this was a reread from childhood. I wish there were more proper puzzle-based stories like this today!!

We Are Taking Only What We Need: Stories by Stephanie Powell Watts 9.5/10 I am learning that I LOVE short stories.

Throne of Glass by Sarah J. Maas 6/10 Solid story, very book. Too long. Cool world-building, but the characters’ behaviors seemed to change a lot and some author choices really niggled at my brain.

The Hedgewitch’s Little Book of Flower Spells by Tudorbeth 7/10 Call me a Pixie Hollow Faerie, but I love a tiny book on flower spells.

Crown of Midnight by Sarah J. Maas 6.5/10 She got more into the characters in this one, letting me love and hate each of them a whole lot more. She also made more story choices I disagree with, but I’m in the Maasverse for the bit at this point.

Edgar Allen Poe: The Great Masters Library 8.5/10 I’m not the biggest fan of the stories he largely wrote for money when he was younger, but I’m a massive fan of his later works and poetry. Brother needed therapy.

Bringing Down the Duke by Evie Dunmore 6/10 Just a fun romp through Regency England to explore romance and women’s rights.

Legends & Lattes by Travis Baldree 9/10 This book was like receiving a warm hug and cozying up with a hot cup of tea under a weighted blanket. Such a nice read, and I love Baldree’s writing style.

Heir of Fire by Sarah J. Maas 8/10 The story started getting really interesting, the characters were developing a ton, and the world opened up a lot. That said, I have had enough of watery bowels.

An Abundance of Katherines by John Green 8.5/10 Glad I finally read this, but I probably would have gotten more out of it if I’d read it as a teenager like I was supposed to.

Dragonsdawn by Anne McCaffrey 9.5/10 Thus begins my attempt at reading the Pern series in chronological order. I love the early books and the late books so much. Only those ones, though, it turns out.

The Chronicles of Pern: First Fall by Anne McCaffrey 8/10 This one is a handful of short stories that flesh out the quickly-changing world. Again, I’m a big fan of short stories now.

The Assassin’s Blade by Sarah J. Maas 4/10 As a prequel, this is better to read before the other books. I was soooooo bored.

The Faerie Path by Allan Frewin Jones 9/10 This book had been sitting on my TBR for so many years, and I was happily surprised at how much I enjoyed it. A fast read, not very fancy prose, but a fantastic story.

Dragonseye by Anne McCaffrey 8.5/10 Anne really brought out her anthropological knowhow to remind us that bullheaded dummies shouldn’t be in power. Oops America.

Grilled for Murder by Maddie Day 7/10 Book 2 of the series my sister accidentally got me book 10 to. I picked out whodunnit within the first chapter, but the why and how and what threw me for a new one.

Magia Magia: Invoking Mexican Magic by Alexis A. Arredondo 8/10 Got this in the massive set of witch books from 2023, and loved learning about the magic practiced here in the southwest. 

Anxiety by Jason & Daniel Freeman 6/10 A tiny Anxiety 101 book, smashed full of info. I wanted more, it just brushed the surface. My fault for not getting a whole ass textbook?

The Hobbit: or There and Back Again by J.R.R. Tolkien 10/10 Every year I read one of the Big Four, and I got to circle back around to the beginning this year for The Hobbit. One of my ultimate comfort reads.

Queen of Shadows by Sarah J. Maas 4/10 I’m sort of losing my patience and running out of steam for Maas with this book. Dudes need to talk about their feelings. I’m just holding on for the lore.

Assistant to the Villain by Hannah Nicole Maehrer 8.5/10 A silly willy book jam packed with poorly veiled yearning, jokes, and murder. Points off for the cliffhanger, boo.

The Sonoran Desert: A Literary Field Guide by Magrane & Cokinos 9/10 Poems/stories paired with pictures and info on local flora and fauna. I wish this had been ten times longer. It was a tasty little snack, and I wanted the whole meal.

Apprentice to the Villain by Hannah Nicole Maehrer 7.5/10 YES I bought the next book immediately. It rehashed a similar relationship arc from the first book, which I didn’t love, but the rest was so fun and I am chomping at the gosh darn bit for the next one. 

Beaverland by Leila Philip 9.5/10 Tell me why a literary nonfiction about the history of beavers and their effect on the planet had me so hooked. No worries, I’m already in therapy.

Dragon’s Kin by Anne & Todd McCaffrey 2/10 Todd, Anne’s son, is the worst thing that ever happened to the Pern series. This is poorly written fan-fiction that Anne lovingly slapped her name on.

Kitchen Princess Vol. 5 by Kobayashi & Ando 10/10 I went to Kitchen Princess for some post-Todd healing, and it worked. This series is just so sweet, pun not intended but embraced nonetheless.

When Autumn Leaves by Amy S. Foster 9/10 A reread, so I knew I’d love it. Ultra-fall commingling stories about weird magic and feminine power, best possible way to start October.

Crushing It by Erin Becker 7/10 A middle school queer book I picked up for a reading challenge. Wasn’t for me, but that’s because it wasn’t written for me. Big points for representation.

Dragon’s Fire by Todd & Anne McCaffrey 1/10 This book is SO BAD there is literally a page and a half copied and pasted again a handful of chapters later. Todd should have left his momma’s work alone. 

The Little Old Lady Who Broke All the Rules by Catharina 7.5/10 My only audiobook of the year about Swiss pensioners going on crazy heists. Kind of a slow read, but hysterical – I love being reminded that old people were young like us!

Going Home by Nora Roberts 3.5/10 I bought a handful of Nora Roberts books because my mom loves them. My mom loves these. I need to buy her other books.

Supermarket by Bobby Hall 6.5/10 Logic wrote a psychological horror about a dude working in a supermarket, admittedly not very well. But, like. He’s a musician. It was still a very cool story idea.

The Scarlet Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne 6/10 Ya gurl made the choice to read this the day before Trump got reelected. I actually hate the “lessons learned” in this book, too, way outdated. Big mad time, you shoulda seen me.

When the Grit Hits the Fan by Maddie Day 7/10 I keep rating these the same, is that bad? They’re reliable! A cozy little murder mystery and the diner owner is all nosey, gotta love it. 

Food Fights & Culture Wars by Tom Nealan 5/10 I thought this would show more forreal history of how food affected world events, but it was more like quirky far fetched ideas and fun facts loosely connecting their potential.

Medusa by Nataly Gruender 9/10 The author is from my hometown, was a classmate of mine, I admit that I’m biased. She didn’t write the story the way I would have, but that’s one of the cool things about Medusa’s story. No goofs here. Gruender did a fantastic job and is a phenomenal writer, and her Medusa story is lovely.

I Put A Spell On You: Autobiography by Nina Simone 8/10 Had to keep reminding myself that Nina was a black woman born in the 1930s, and having that perspective helped me accept her choices and priorities. But now the music that I loved already means so much more!

Circle of Magic #1 by Tamora Pierce 10/10 Tamora Pierce is the single author I would break down and cry to meet in person. I needed a comfort reread after the last two books about female hardship.

Circle of Magic #2 by Tamora Pierce 10/10 Okay, so maybe I needed TWO comfort rereads. Found family, cool worldbuilding, magic, the works.

Lightlark by Alex Aster 7/10 Hated this at first, but was enjoying it by the end. I’m suuuuure all the worldbuilding holes will be fleshed out in the following books, yeah?

Dragonharper by Todd & Anne McCaffrey 2.5/10 Get Todd out of here, please. I can tell, by certain sections that sound a ton more like Anne, that she or her editor had a bigger hand in parts of this book. While other parts made me gag. Literally why did they publish these??

Dragonsblood by Todd & Anne McCaffrey 6.5/10 Too many reused tropes from other books Todd spearheaded, the idea of this story was actually really cool and the writing reminded me a TON of Anne’s earliest Pern books.

Stardust by Neil Gaiman 5.5/10 After loving Neverwhere, I was surprised to feel so neutral about Stardust. The fun, colorful movie adaptation clearly set me up with the wrong expectations.

On the Road by Jack Kerouac 8.5/10 Kerouac could stand to be less of a racist and womanizer. That said, beat writing styles are just so tasty, like a cappuccino on a rainy day. 

A beautifully exact 7.25 average for the year! I tried to broaden my reading horizons a bit more, but also went back to a handful of rereads and chronologies I already loved. I somehow ended 2024 with even MORE books on my TBR than I had started, so let’s see what I manage to get through in 2025!