#mindfulcompassion

awkwardbeauti

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Grateful Mindful Spiritually Aligned Emotions of life happiness joy bliss despite the challenges faith in the miracles of knowing will inspire greatness to become & creative possibilities of open minded soul desires so that always aligning with who you truly are is the greatest escape of choosing peace ☮️ instead ☮️☮️☮️☮️👀🎤 Agree? #miraclemindset #mindbodysoul #mindfulcompassion #peacewithin (at Residence Inn by Marriott Rocky Mount) https://www.instagram.com/p/CS3Vu9esP1v/?utm_medium=tumblr

  I have practiced mindfulness on and off for years however good intentions to practice regularly always have seem to slip by the way side. It is only when something traumatic, or difficult happens in my life that I am drawn back and think why on earth don’t I do this more often! At some of the most difficult times of my life it has been an anchor for me, helping me manage difficult emotions and paralysing anxiety. Being diagnosed and treated for breast cancer slowed me down.  I began wondering at the awesomeness of life because I was confronted with the realisation that it could be taken from me before I am hoped and since this time I have been trying desperately to hold on to this wonderment, to keep the pace slower which allows me to not just live but experience life; to take joy from simple pleasures and moments in which wonderful memories are made. I have said before time is the most precious thing of all. It was put to me yesterday, by a Buddhist monk called Dave, that life is just a series of moments and that all we ever really have is this one now….and now…and now etc. That we get so caught up in doing that we forget that we are not human doings but human beings. I learnt from the retreat that perhaps trying so hard to hold on to this wonderment is the very thing making it so hard for me to do so. I keep striving, trying and criticising myself for failing to do is creating my own suffering. There are many lessons in that, the first is to stop trying to be in the moment and just be in it. The second and the aim of the retreat is to be kind to yourself. The title of the retreat was mindful compassion. The idea being that if we practice challenging our own inner critic, compassionately, with a voice of inner compassion then everyone benefits. What we cause ourselves with this inner critic voice does not feel good and it is often passed on to those closest to us, damaging our relationships and leading to more self-criticism and so it perpetuates. If we take care of our physical and mental health, if we practice relating to ourselves in a more compassionate, tolerant way, then we will be more likely to show that same level of compassion and tolerance to others. This takes practice because our inner critic has had years and years of growth as we have paid fed it, reinforced it and created systems of relating to the world based on what it says to us. We live very much today in our own heads. Planning, projecting and imagining futures which may or may not happen or looking back at what has been or generating ideas and abstract concepts . Not all this is bad, it is what has kept humans going and progressing throughout time. However now perhaps more than ever before we are separate from the world around us, the world we are in and even from ourselves.  Rushing through the day from one distraction to the next. It is estimated I learnt that we have an estimated 800,000 thoughts a day. It is natural and normal but what if that chatter was turned down, slowed down? What if one thought did not have to lead another thought? What if our response was just to accept that thought and maybe the emotion, notice it and let it go. To be mindful of it and perhaps before choosing to turn our attention to our breath, our little finger, the flower, the rain, the carpet or something else? The choice on where to place our attention is entirely ours, whilst acknowledging and being mindful of distractions, noticing but not judging or engaging. The choice on what to engage with, when to plan and have ideas and when to find stillness, is ours, with practice. We did 7 different mindfulness practices on the retreat. Some were familiar to me and some were new. In one we paid attention to one part of our bodies, then narrowed that focus more and more before expanding it again. We then used this narrowing and expanding with mindful pottering. This is walking without aim and stopping at the first thing which catches your eye, for me the carpet, and narrowing focus, before expanding again. In this and with the mindful walking I experienced a kind of elongating of time, as though each moment expanded to let the detail fill it. Another practice involved developing our compassionate voice and using what we imagined this voice saying to write a compassionate letter to ourselves. This I found to have a profound impact on me and I think is a really powerful tool. So to me it seems there are three elements here which I wish to make use of: Being mindful of what is around me, of my thoughts and the choice I have to engage with those or not; using mindfulness practices regularly; treating myself with compassion and developing, nurturing my own inner compassionate voice. I don’t want to waste my time with suffering any more than I need to, I don’t want to fill my head with negativity and don’t want to fight my own body. How to do this, how to let go, including on how to let go of trying is something I want to learn more about.