#milagro

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I’m curious about your thoughts on Milagro — how you feel about it, how you think it fits into season 6’s overall arc, and where it leaves MSR at the end of it. Personally, I’ve always been rather perplexed by this episode, in terms of what the writers intended with it.

Also, have you ever considered writing fic about it?

Thank you!!

Hi Anon. It's taken me a few days to respond to you because of reasons I'll elaborate on below, but the short answer to your question is that I do like Milagro. If I were in the writers' room, would I have argued to do things slightly differently? Yes, probably, but I still can't resist the episode.

First, I like any episode that adds a little dark layer or complication to Scully--or even focuses on her interiority at all-- and I think this one does. I think it's helpful to compare to Never Again. In Never Again, Scully is feeling the walls close in around her--she's wondering if this increasingly lonely and alienated life she's living is something she chose or something she fell into. She's desperate for someone to see her, acknowledge her, recognize her, and famously, she doesn't get that from Mulder, hence the tragedy of that episode. In Milagro, several years later, we see her living a life within walls she seems to have carefully constructed herself, and she says outright that it is a choice.

Yet there's part of her that is still looking to be seen / acknowledged / recognized, and Padgett plays on that desire. I don't think Scully is really attracted to him or tempted by him, but I think his attention does meet that need a little, hence why she is curious about it. Lord knows I understand this in Scully; she has basically put her professional and personal life completely in Mulder's orbit! So especially in season 6, when she has reason to question her value to him, it's got to be intriguing to think: hey, what if I came first to someone? What if someone saw me and cared so much to observe little things about me? To come up with ridiculously overwritten prose about me?

There's an interpretation of the episode that says it's weird / problematic for Scully to feel that way because of the attention of a creepy stalker, but again, I think Padgett mostly just gets her thinking about it. I don't think we're supposed to be thinking Scully is being seriously successfully wooed. And I think the episode is pointing us towards thinking that Mulder sees her, Mulder observes her, Mulder puts her first, although ... yeah, I would have liked that to be a little more crystal clear. It focuses a lot on Scully's feelings towards Mulder -- the Agent Scully is already in love business. But the ending--her grasping Mulder like that, his expression, etc. -- seems to emphasize the reality and groundedness of their mutual connection.

Second, I admit I just like the implied angst for Mulder throughout this episode. We only get to see a little of it onscreen, but I think it's there; he is agitated by this. In the overall season 6 story arc this is all golden, and in fanfic this episode is often a turning point for them.

Now... the actual X-file? Hahaha, listen, I don't know. When this episode aired back in the day, I think I was like ... wait, what? I think there's some kind of metaphor about the creative process here, but I'm not sure it really holds together, and I'm not sure there's ever an actual plot explanation for what is causing Padgett's ideas to be materialized. These days I just try to focus on the character shit and don't worry too much.

I don't think the writers intended this to be a story about male creators who romanticize and idealize their female characters but don't actually take the time to get to know real living women... but I admit nowadays I read that a little into the episode myself lol. Padgett pretty clearly creates himself a dream character who loves him and wants to have sex with him and resembles a real woman in every way except that the real woman isn't into him. I mean, many of us have met that guy IRL. I don't know if that was what CC was going for though.

Now have I ever written about this episode? It's funny you say that, because I have a Milagro post-ep (Heartless) that has been 80% finished FOREVER. It's 2 chapters, but I just can't figure the ending out. When I got your ask, it motivated me to go back and look at it again, thinking: okay, good, I'll finish this shit up and post it for Anon! But that was folly, pure folly, and that's why I have been slow to respond lol. I will look at it again this week and see if anything clicks.

In the mean time, I do have a list of Milagro fic recommendations right here. Especially if you like hurt/comfort, it's a gold mine.

Oh, and I made that list before I read this one, and I would add it to the list, too: a gasp and a stutter of a heart  - what lies above Mulder’s reaction if Scully actually died at the end of Milagro. Except everything isn’t exactly what it seems. Heartbreaking, no pun intended.

I would venture to guess yes, personally. CC & Co. usually tuck away the "big" episodes and reference them later.

Here's what the script says:

And here's their faces:

I think he knows it's not entirely out of Scully's character-- even Scully knows, hence why she's "disturbed" rather than shocked.