#middle regression

Taking good care of myself and eating good has been so much easier with agedre

there was a park in the city i grew up in with a creek just off to the side in a wooded area. there were some stable fallen trees that could be used as bridges and we used to go looking for salamanders. one time i followed the creek to the end, where i found it opened up into a pond. i used to just hang out there for hours with a couple family friends and their kids, exploring and pretending to be adventurers on a quest

ich bin auch rabaukin, messy und kunterbund

meine echt kindheit war voller wilde kerle, draußen spielen, geflickten latzhosen und tomboy look

UND barbies, ballet unterricht und sommerkleidern

und genau diese mischung spüre ich auch heute noch, und gibt mir auch heute noch am meisten comfort :)

(kleiner rant ohne sinn?)

it’s not like there’s really a choice.

regression isn’t something we just think about and it happens.

at least not for me and Ashira (that’s what I call big me. It’s not her real name, but she uses it to write under.)

I used to have a different name a long time ago, but i don’t remember what it was. I’ve only been called Shiri for about a year or so.

Sometimes I kind of know what’s going on in Ashira’s life, sometimes not.

She doesn’t always remember things I do. Dunno why.

When she was in university she had a doctor who helped her with the bad stuff from childhood. i think that’s when she first started regressing.

Then she got better and joined the navy and more bad stuff happened and she forgot about it for a long time.

Then something happened that made her start remembering and she got back into seeing someone to help her with that.

Sometimee after that is when i started showing up. For a long time it was like i was just watching a show on tv or a movie.

then one day, Ashira went to sleep and and i was able to do stuff instead of just watching.

lately, it’s been me more than her.

her therapy doctors don’t know anything about age regression. she asked them.

i’d found a MH discord that was really good, and had an agere channel. the ppl were rly nice. but the owner wasn’t comfortable with nig me being there. so she left.

i didnt get to say goodbye to ne1.

now i can’t find newhere else.

crying all the time.

if i was a little, it might be better? but i’m not. and the places that say middle space are the nsfw stuff i don’t want.

i lived that when i was little. that’s why i can’t be little again.

crap. well. i hadn’t cried today until now.

shiri - too old for the littles table, not grown up enough for anywhere else.