#michael townsend

Growing up on a farm doesn’t leave much time for hobbies, and what hobbies Dennis could have were mandated to be masculine ones. He played football until he broke his arm. Wrestled until his brothers grew tired of feeling embarrassed by him at matches. Then came hunting, GoRuck, even swimming (with much contesting from his father, who allowed it only because it was better than lacrosse). None stuck. Denis - lanky, feminine, unwanted little brother Dennis - made sure of that, one way or another.

Dennis would watch his mother embroider late into the evenings. He’d listen about Nutcracker ballet rehearsals from his female cousins at Thanksgiving, watch his sister-in-laws figure skate on shaky legs at Christmas. Always wanting to join but never permitted to. Forever too feminine to be good at what his brothers were and yet, not feminine enough to be allowed to even try what his female family engaged in.

It’s a date night when this comes out to his boyfriends. A poorly timed joke about distracting him from what he loves leads to a poorly hidden, disappointed reply about them being what he loves, and besides, what hobbies would he have to love, anyways?

Robby and Jack fix Dennis with a concerned stare. Across the table, Dennis squirms.

“Well, I guess I read a lot, but I can do that anywhere. Unless…does watching Love Island counts as a hobby? Trin’ makes me watch with her every week…”

The laugh he gives is so awkward. Meant to dispel the tension, but all it does is draw attention to the fact that he doesn’t have doesn’t have hobbies. He’s so active? And outgoing?? Why doesn’t he have hobbies oh god have we taken him away from his hobbies-

No! Dennis cries, No, you haven’t pulled me away from anything. He explains his childhood, the hobbies he tried but never stuck with, the ones he envied but couldn’t try. Oh, it makes the two men’s hearts swell with pity. They share a knowing look. Nod along inconspicuously as Dennis rambles anxiously.

And two weeks later, they have Trinity Santos sat at the same restaurant table, quizzing her about every conversation she and Dennis have maybe ever had.

Robby and Jack are thankful for Santos. She’s so easy to buy - a free meal, coffee for a month, and an agreement for no triage in the next two weeks, and she’s offering up Dennis deepest secrets. The desires he confided in her during the Winter Olympics or an outing to Michael’s. He wants to learn to knit. And scrapbook. He’s never been skating or skiing, never danced or did yoga or or or. There are so many things he’s yet to try, too poor or too afraid, and Santos hands them to Robby and Jack on a silver platter.

cassie fucking jumps OUT OF A TREE onto webber (we moved on way too fast from this)

michael accuses his father of sleeping with his business partners daughter but surprise! celine is actually michael’s half sister

cassie’s mom dated a guy who had an evil twin locked up in a hidden basement in a church (genuinely what the fuck was going on in gaither)

said evil twin escaped from said hidden basement and tried to kill cassie’s mom so naturally she killed him

“never have i ever made out with michael townsend” “someday, big guy. if you’re very good.” (WHAT THE FUCK)

briggs gets poisoned in vegas, he recovers and it is literally never mentioned again

judd asks cassie if her grandma is single at her MOM’S FUNERAL (that’s one way to do it i guess)

lacey locke used her own mo as an example of one when she was teaching cassie (this was so fucked up btw)

malcolm lowell fucking stabbed HIMSELF a crap ton of times just so it wouldn’t seem suspicious that his daughter and son-in-law got killed

oh and he also ran away from gaither despite needing a live-in nurse (how did he even manage that)

aaron shaw FUCKING DIES

daniel redding quotes shakespeare (fairly often)

sloane’s mom overdosed. this is mentioned exactly two times

celine does facial reconstruction on two dead bodies and uses this as a date opportunity with sloane

lia lived in a bathroom at the met

cassie describes her voice as “seductive” when trying to play to TA geoff’s ego (i found this very funny but also i was slightly uncomfortable)