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I wonder how anybody has the energy to do anything. I’m sitting in bed thinking about how I don’t want to go on with the day. I woke up an hour ago but I want to sleep again. Can I take this slowly? I have a lot to do. Should I just get up and be courageous? I can’t. It isn't about courage, or whether I’m lazy or not. I don’t even know what it is about, just that I absolutely cannot move sometimes.
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Here, have a depressed hooded selfie ... because, reasons.
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.I’m a bit scared of the future. If what already came, was painfull; how am i going to survive what comes next. More sleepless nights, are the thoughts running around my mind going to increase again, am I going to hate myself even more, or will I learn how to love myself, get selfsteem, and boost my confidence?
Too many things are slowly killing my mind, and I really don’t know how to deal with them anymore. I want to do so many things yet, but I’m sinking without even getting the chance to realise it.
Meeting more people to stop with the horrible feeling of being alone, but feeling lonely even when I am surrounded by many people and my social anxiety increasing to the point of not being able to breathe, but neither to ask for help, move, or calm down.
I’m afraid of loving someone but being too clingy, or not caring enough about the relationship, ending up in a one-sided love relationship or not being able to be loved by someone.
Not being able of achieving my goals or setting unrealistic/imposible goals. I’m scared of not being enough for me or anyone else. I don’t know if I have to follow the established stereotypes, because I’m too scared of finding my true-self and show it to everyone because I’m scared of rejection.
Having to curse at myself, to keep my expectations, and self-steem low, because I know that someone is going to end up doing it at the end of the day, so I prepare myself mentaly for when that time of the day comes. Or my mind just auto-destroying my self, by calling me names or blaming me for things I never meant to do. Having to apologize for things I shouldn’t.
Unconsiously start crying until I fall asleep, and not being able to tell my parents or my siblings because they wouldn’t understand.
So apropos right now #apropos #quote #quotes #questions #quoteoftheday #quotestoliveby #breakupmemes #bestig #blogger #bloggers #marriage #divorce #tired #sotired #wornout #exhausted #mentallydrained #mentallyexhausted #mentallytired #yep #true #truth #verytrue (at New York, New York)
Been tagged a bunch recently, for sure by @thoughtsofapapabear and by @caniwishforthis ... maybe by a few others, too? Apologies if I can’t remember and you did. Been feeling pretty crappy (mentally) but here’s some fun with Snap filters, anyway.
... not sure who I should tag back; maybe @mysticgryph92 @lilyofthevalley-doesntknow @withouttheweightofbeingwhole @bigjewface
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
I’m supposed to be out in the cul de sac with all the neighbors for the 4th, masked & distancing of course, but I’m still in my PJs and it sounds so much better to just go back to bed & watch shitty movies ... y’all the struggle is real. 😬😢🤦♂️😓
@the-queer-alien tagged for selfies ... and I’ve been going back and forth on what to post, even whether to post ... but whatever, here’s me and some thoughts.
... believe it or not, the tie-dye hoodie is a filter. 😅 ... makes me want more big oversized hoodies, though; especially tie-dye ones.
Tomorrow’s not even here yet, and I’m pretty sure I’m over it already ...
I think I’ve been tagged recently, but I’m pretty shitty (mentally) right now. I’m sorry I don’t remember who it was ... and I’m not sure I really wanna call anyone out. If you post a selfie & think of tagging me, I’d love it!!
