#mass effect absolution

Emrys's demeanour was unsettling. Sebastian had never seen him act like this before. He had repeatedly told Sebastian that the Abby would be the safest place for their family and that they would ride out the invasion together on an utterly untouchable ship. Emrys had always been so cold about it, but now something worried the AI. Was this just old residual directives to protect his people resurfacing, or something else?

Emrys's avatar stood in the centre of simulated space, shuffling viewports, enlarging images, and wiping them away. Nebulas, stars, and systems revolving around him made Sebastian's head swim. He stepped forward and interrupted, "Ems, speak to us."

"The batarians are finished. They didn't stand a chance. The Reapers used their system as a gateway to the entire galaxy," Emrys reported. "They have since divided their forces, half journeyed to the Apien Crest and are currently moving world to world, intent on systematically wiping out the turian race. Palaven is on fire, entire colonies destroyed in a matter of moments, tying up most of the turian fleet in their home systems.

"The rest of the Reaper forces have moved onto Sol and Earth. I am sorry, my friends, this was easy for them."

"No…" Sebastian could barely believe what he was seeing. His lament was accompanied by similar gasps of disbelief from the rest of the crew. At the same time, an uncharacteristically stoic Tegan stood behind him and took his hand, resting the other on his shoulder.

"It is a sound strategy," Emrys continued. "The two council races that could have potentially offered any resistance, trapped, struggling to defend their homeworlds against impossible numbers. They are effectively cut off from one another. No help for either is coming."

"What about the asari, the salarians?" asked Kat from behind.

"And the quarians!" piped up Yin, "We have the largest fleet in the galaxy."

"The quarians are too busy gathering strength on the outer rim, ready to throw themselves at the geth. While the asari are paralysed by indecision, the salarians retreat to the relative safety of their own remote system. All are safe for now. Very soon, they will not be. Where do you think the Reapers will go when they finish with Palaven and Earth?

"The harvest has begun, and it will be plentiful. The fractured species of this cycle have practically given themselves to the invaders."

Unable to tear his eyes away from the viewports, Sebastian felt sick. He didn't wish to see Earth under siege, but he couldn't help but watch this galactic tragedy unfold. So much death and misery, and for what? Why were they doing this? "You sound almost in awe of them," he said.

"It is hard not to be," Emrys admitted, "everything they have done in the last fifty-thousand years has led to this point. They have become very good at farming this galaxy. Expertly planting the technological seeds from which you grow, leaving sentinels behind to keep an eye on the crop, filtering out the weeds, and gathering enough followers to sow the correct amount of descent.

"What looks like mindless slaughter to you has been planned to the smallest detail to optimise this galaxy-wide extinction event. Think of the simulations they must have run, and the calculations needed to ensure this time would be faster and more efficient than the last. That plan now executed flawlessly to terrible effect."

"There must be something you can do?" Tegan's voice broke as he spoke.

"I may be able to take out a system or two," replied Emrys, "but their numbers are too great. Unless we have the means to hit them all simultaneously, we will be ineffective at halting the invasion. With every world they conquer, their forces grow."

Live images of the invasion of Earth and Palaven filled the walls around them. Emrys was tracking the movement of every single Reaper, and they were here in unbelievable numbers. Moving in great dark clouds across the galaxy, arriving in systems instantly and en masse via the relay system. Each capital ship may seem small next to the size of the Absolution. But Emrys was correct; there were so many of them, he'd never take them all out before being overwhelmed by the swarm.

Emrys had warned of the coming invasion, yet Sebastian had always lived in the moment without really thinking about how it would be the day the Reapers arrived. How he, an old soldier, would feel so helpless, stuck out in space on a ship, safe from the conflict. All he could do was sit and watch while his siblings-in-arms fought and died. It was killing him inside.

The image of Palaven enlarged and filled the centre of the room. Emrys strolled around it and then stopped.

It broke Sebastian out of his shocked silence. He knew from experience whatever caught Emrys's attention had to be a big deal. "Whoa," he exclaimed softly, numbness creeping over him, thankful for something else to think about other than Earth, "That's a lot of Reapers for one small moon. What do you think they are doing there?"

"Yeah, they just waltzed straight past Mars," agreed Tegan, "hit Earth after flattening Luna from orbit. What is it about that moon they find so bloody interesting?"

Emrys wrapped an arm around his own waist, resting his chin on the closed fist of his free hand and stood pondering the Reaper's activity. The humans hadn't failed to notice the slight quiver in his mandibles, which was never a good sign.

"Ems, what is it?" Sebastian asked. What can be worse than this?

"Menae," Emrys said finally, "the Hierarchy considers it to be of vital strategic importance. A matter of global security. It has become a symbol for the turian people. They believe if they lose Menae, they lose Palaven. What they fail to realise is that they've already lost. The Reapers do not care about one small moon or its symbolism; they don't even care that they've just killed the Primarch.

"Contrary to turian belief, the strategic importance of Menae means nothing to the Reapers. They are there because they are looking for something." Emrys turned to face his expectant crew. "Menae is the birthplace of every turian black project, Sebastian, including me."

"And this is a problem for us because?" Sebastian wondered aloud.

"The facility where I was created lies in a vault deep underground, through a complex network of tunnels. It was sealed when I made my escape," Emrys turned back to the 3D image of the small silver moon, now displaying detailed internal schematics, "Menae is riddled with such abandoned facilities."

Sebastian's eyes widened, and he suddenly felt cold, "The Reapers know this?" He asked.

"Of course they do. The Reapers have always known of my existence. I have blocked them from my network since I came online."

"Okay, so why do they need to find this place now? What's there?" Sebastian asked, although he feared he already knew the answer.

Emrys's frame stiffened. He clasped his hands behind his back and rocked on his toes before admitting. "My command codes-"

"Gods," gasped Nana; she appeared next to Faith and took her hand. The two looked at each other and then back to Emrys. Kat's mouth fell open, and Yin glanced for the exit.

"Oh, shit!" exclaimed Sebastian; that was the last thing he wanted to hear. He let go of Tegan and turned, bringing his hands up to cover his ears. Perhaps, if he couldn't hear any more, then this shit wouldn't be real.

"Can't you just change them?" Tegan asked with a shrug.

"No. It's not like just changing a password," Emrys huffed, "it is written into my base code. I cannot change it any more than you can change your DNA."

The colour drained from Tegan's face, "Seb, we are fucking fucked," he concluded.

Sebastian put one hand on his hip and pinched the bridge of his nose with the other, sighing deeply. "So if the Reapers get a hold of those codes, they get you, full access to the relay network, the Abby and her weapons."

"Correct," said Emrys. "We cannot destroy the facility from orbit; it is too deep. Only boots on the ground can do this."

Emrys stopped a little ahead and turned again to face her, "Here, my will is manifest,” he said, with a sudden flick of his wrist, a ball of flame appeared in his hand. He turned it around as it danced in his open palm. "Here, I can make you feel warm,” he said, throwing the flame to the floor, causing a large burning ring to encircle them both.

Faith felt a hot tingling sensation on her skin as if she was standing in front of a real fire while Emrys paused for the briefest of moments, searching her with those strange eyes that did not reflect the flames around them, only shone from light from within. 

"Or cold,” he said suddenly, and the flames disappeared with a tilt of his head. The dojo became a freezer. Veins of ice ripped open across the floors and wall.

Faith stood rooted to the spot as a chill ran through her body and a feeling of vertigo as she peered into a dark frozen void below. Her heart leapt, but before she could adjust, the dojo returned, and Emrys was still standing there, closer now. Her heart was beating so loud she wondered if he could hear it.

"I can make you feel the force of a blow," he said, placing the end of his practice staff in the centre of her chest. Her eyes widened as he let the end of his stave fall as he approached. The air moved around her as he passed. She felt hairs on the back of her neck stand on end as he appeared at her shoulder, and whispered, “or the softest of breezes."

He circled her slowly, eventually stopping and resuming his original position. "Here, I can conjure nightmares," he concluded darkly, then added with a smile, "or make dreams come true."

Faith looked up at him in wonder. So he can recreate anything he wants here, in this space. Everything down to the slightest detail, even the physical experiences. The revelation thrilled her but was no good. She had to ask, and signed with a wry smile, "But you still bought a real piano?"

He flashed his teeth again, and she wondered if he was blushing but with a turian, who could tell? "You'll have to forgive me for that little indulgence," he said, “as a fellow musician, you must also appreciate the quality of its sound versus anything… simulated.” The word seemed to catch in his throat. His head dropped, and he turned away so she couldn't see his face, his voice trailing to almost a whisper. "It seems that for some things in life, there is no substitution for the real thing."

Her heart fell into her boots. She didn't care that Emrys was a simulation. He was still a person, just as real to Faith as any other crew member. It hurt her to think that he didn't believe it. That he saw himself as some kind of poor imitation. How could he believe that when he was so much more? She wanted to take his hand and tell him so. She moved towards him, but he turned again to face her, stopping her dead in her tracks.

"While your father is correct, the turians have many admirable hand-to-hand techniques," he said, looking her over. "Perhaps an asari combat style would suit you better?" With that, Emrys's image dissolved into a wave of tiny pixels, and he took on the form of an asari. When they opened their eyes, the same bright blue and green iris' stared back at her. 

The shock made Faith jump. She shook her head, "holy shit, he can do that?" She thought, holding up her hands and directing her gaze anywhere but at the asari standing before her. Embarrassment flooded through her. She felt she couldn't let him train her, her attraction was too great, I can’t do this, not with him.

In a blink of an eye, Emrys changed back. He regarded her intently from his original lofty position, tilted his head to one side and leant casually on his practice staff. He smiled again and said, “interesting."

"Stop it!" She signed, feeling the knot in her stomach grow tighter under his intense gaze.

"Stop what?" He asked, still smiling.

"Stop studying me. I'm not a subject for study.” Faith’s hands moved sharply as she narrowed her eyes.

"Oh, but you are to me," Emrys replied wistfully, "you all are. Again, you'll have to forgive me, I have a curiosity that can never rest, and you are such a puzzle, Faith O'Hara-Crosse. One that I wish to help you solve."

emrys by @deathblossomart

Originally the shuttle was called ‘absolution’ and was named by Tegan. The relay powered dreadnaught Emrys flies did not have a name.

Then I wrote a lore-friendly backstory as to how this turian-built ship ended up being called a name that maybe the turians didn’t even have a concept of. I can’t tell you, because of spoilers, but it was fun! I will share all in time.

Also, oiginally, I called the fic ‘Absolution, a Mass Effect Story’, because I started writing it shortly after Rogue One was released and formatting your fic titles like that was de rigueur.

I later switched it back for the re-write, to a more traditional title for the Mass Effect series and then blow me… If they didn’t release a dragon age anime on Netflix the following years that made me feel all kinds of embarrassment. I thought people would think it was somehow related to this new show, since both are bioware IP.

It’s not, I started writing this fic in 2018, long before I knew this other show was going to exist. The embarrassment did cause a writer’s block for a short while, ngl.

I considered abandoning the story altogether.

I considered changing the name of the fic. But at that point the name had been woven into the story via the name of the ship and the central themes etc.

In the end, it was pure spite allowed me to continue. I’m not going to give anyone the satisfaction of knowing I’ve given up, no matter what bioware does, so I won’t.

I’ve always been a writer, but mostly non-fiction. I never expected to become a fiction writer, in any capacity, that’s a whole other skillset that I didn’t think that I possessed.

Then this story and the characters dropped into my lap. It took hold of my dreams and wouldn’t let go. It became this wonderful place that I could slip into why my whole world came crashing down.

I know, writing fiction doesn’t come naturally to me and I still have a lot to learn. I’m trying to get better and be a better writer.

I’m such a geek, I took the actual canon length of a reaper capital ship, a relay and the abby and sat them side-by-side to scale.

The result was hilarious and forced a re-write. I had been writing a scene where Harbinger attacks Emrys and … yeah… well…

On the upside, at least this explains how Emrys is not scared of his old nemesis. At least, not physically, omg, lol. I was in fits.

Yeah, Harby had better make sure he brings some friends to this fight. A lot of friends. 🤣

Chapter 22: Enjoy the Silence - Trapped in the mind of a Reaper, Faith discovers her true power, the opportunity to turn the tide of the war, and perhaps rescue a friend along the way.

Chapter 23: Running Up That Hill - The team re-group and lick their wounds. They watch the events of London from afar. It’s all up to Shepard now.

Chapter 24: Helvestesfonster/Life Eternal.

(Might give you a clue of how long this one has been hanging around my brain. I was deep in my Ghost obsession when I started writing this story).

Shepard’s ultimate decision has devastating consequences for the Abby and her crew. But I don’t just leave it there.