@answeringmysister won this round!
The 53rd Win A Commission story was āWest of the Sun, East of the Moonā, based on the Norwegian fairy tale, āEast of the Sun, West of the Moonā! If you would like to read the story and see the illustrations in context, please
Dani was tired of the East Coast. Tired of the traffic, tired of the loneliness of being one in millions, tired of her family's drama.
So when a recruiter offered her a contract in Alaska, she snapped it up.
āAre you out of your mind?ā Asked everyone she knew.
And every time, she would tell them the same answer. She loved her friends, her family, even her very dependent maman. But it was just too much.
āDah-nee-el-la,ā her maman would say, drawing it out in a way only a Dominican accent could. āWe have no family up there! No friends! Who will take care of you?ā
Unspoken was the āWho will take care of me?ā Maman had cancer attacking her spine.
Dani had been her roommate, her confidant, her servant, and a little bit her punching bag for too long.
Meanwhile, her brother had finished school and then some.
The lawyer for the misdiagnosis case was still working on it, but it had been eight years ā so Dani did not expect anything to happen now.
Dani was 27. She deserved to have her twenties too.
āMaman, Iāll be fine. I can fly back whenever I want!ā - provided that there wasnāt a snow storm ā āand itās only a year. Jordan will stay hereā ā to keep an eye on you, finally ā āuntil I get back.ā
Dani was not going to be dissuaded.
So when her contract at Cooper finished up and Christmas was over, Dani hopped on a plane with several bags of clothes and left for Alaska, much to her mamanās dismay.
āAt least I probably wonāt have any seizures!ā She assured her maman as she stood in line to board. āYou know they donāt really happen unless itās too hot or bright, anymore.ā
Dani flew from Philadelphia to Chicago, from Chicago to Seattle, and then stopped at a hotel for the night. The next morning, she flew to Anchorage, got delayed for 17 hours due to a storm, and finally arrived in QikiqtaĔruk.
Once upon a time, the town was called Kotzebue, after an āexplorerā, but it had recently returned to its IƱupiaq roots. She was to work in the Maniilaq Health Center, and emergency room. She adored the fast pace, and the stretch of her mind as she sought a solution. Sure, a lot of the time she would mostly just work with colds or mild allergic reactions, but she knew how to take the fun with the boring.
She picked up the keys to the car she leased, loaded her stuff, and slowly made her way through the icy roads to the little house on the northern outskirts of town that she was renting for the year.
As she suspected, the pictures had managed to hide a couple of issues ā a mold spot in the bathroom, peeling paint ā but otherwise, it was a good house. Toasty, already furnished, and quiet. Plus, it had a beautiful view of the sea to the west, and the low foothills to the east.
She would never tell her maman this, but on that first day, she slept straight on the mattress, no sheets at all.
By the third day, the house was mostly set up. Dani knew that sheād have to work the next day, and was not used to the time change yet. So she made everything comfortable, treated herself to some local sushi and set up her own house.
Her very own house.
The quiet was initially unnerving ā her mamanās house basically needed a revolving door, with the amount of relatives from France, England, Dominica, and all over the continental United States passed through. Dani had loved it, but long to try something a little different.
Plus, it was pretty hard to date when your maman was constantly around.
But Dani pushed that thought away. Surely sheād be too busy for that!
āāā
She was not. It turns out, while living alone meant that she was the only one doing chores, that also meant she did not have to clean up after anyone else. Leaving her a lot of free time.
She thought about getting a cat, but decided against it. She really liked only having to take care of herself.
But that didnāt mean she liked being with only herself, all the time.
The other staff at Maniilaq were extremely friendly, and Dani could not keep track of how many outings, parties or high school sports games she attended with her new friends. Most of them were paired up or married to someone in town or close by, but that did not mean her options were limited.
After all, EVERYBODY had a cousin or a friend or a grandmotherās dogās groomerās husbandās brotherās neighbor who was just perfect for her.
And when she let slip she was pan? That just opened her up to more matchmaking attempts.
Finally, after the potential stress of starting dating around Valentineās Day had passed ā she had spent that weekend watching sappy romances over Teleparty with her old friend Manuela - Dani agreed to go on a couple dates.
āJust a few!ā She warned, stomach sinking at the overly large grins on her coworkersā faces. She couldāve sworn Melissa in the back was chanting under her breath, āFresh meat!ā Over and over again.
A few (āJust three or four!ā) turned to several (āEighth timeās the charm!ā) Until the amount reached the double digits. Dani was becoming pretty familiar with the restaurants in town, much to her palateās delight and her walletās chagrin.
A few were a little too quiet for her taste people. People she ended up befriending, but not dating. She wanted someone to help her fill her house with singing, talking and just general noise.
Some just had beliefs and habits that grated on her own. Things like not stopping completely at a stop sign, or asking excessively personal questions when she mentioned her last boyfriend was trans. Those people, she ghosted as soon as she got home.
Then there was that lady who was extremely forward and did not take no for an answer when Dani refused to kiss her good night. Danny had to jab her in the kidney before she got the message. Dani had a slight frame, but a mean left hook.
Thankfully, the friend who recommended Ms. Handsy was very ashamed and told Dani that her cousin had really only been up for the the woman anyway. Dani happily never saw her again.
On her thirteenth (āAnd last!ā) date, Dani went out with a person named Ada. They were tall, and rounded in a way that told Dani that they really liked food, but enjoyed exercise too. They had spider bite piercings, catching the light under their smooth brown lips. Their dark eyes sparkled with mirth, accentuated by their eyelashes and facial tattoos, a skin tapestry of pride. Their hair and little mustache were black with cinnamon strands in the light, and straight as a pin. Overall, Ada was pretty cute.
āWhatās something fun I can do when itās hot out?ā Dani asked after they made their introductions and ordered. āIām enjoying catching up on my shows and books here ā one of the first things I did was get a library card ā but I am looking forward to the sun again.ā
Ada giggled. āYeah, I guess itās a big change from New Jersey! It wonāt even be warm enough to play in the snow for another month, basically.ā They thought for a moment. āWell, we have a couple wailing festivals around the area ā I am a champ at blanket-tossing.ā
Dani didnāt know what that was exactly but nodded anyway.
āāAnd thereās sailing and hiking and ā oh! Probably the biggest change is that we kind of become ā whatās the word? You know, not diurnal or nocturnal but the other one?ā
Dani nodded in her head. āCrep- crap- creps-ā
āCrepsuc- crepus-ā
āCrepuscular?ā
āCrepuscular!ā Ada hit their palm on the table. āYes, that!ā Suddenly embarrassed, they lowered their voice. āIt doesnāt get disgustingly hot exactly. Our summers usually only hit the 60s, with only a few days much higher than that. Global warming, you know.ā They rolled their eyes and Dani joined in. āBut what does happen is that it gets so bright you could burn just like that!ā They snapped their fingers.
Dani looked at their skin, a warm terra-cotta, darker than her own tawny. Both were slightly pallid from the lack of sun. āI donāt burn easy. It even affects you?ā
āOh yeah. So we all kind of exist during the sunrise and sunset. Even some jobs switch their shifts to those times.ā
āDonāt they like, end quickly? You make it sound like sunset is a whole eight hours.ā
They shrug. āItās not eight hours, but it is a couple hours. If we were a few hours more north, the sun wouldnāt go down at all!ā
Dani sat back. āHuh. I know the sun shows up differently around the world ā I was even attracted to the darkness of your winter! ā But I guess I didnāt really think about how it would balance with the rest of the year.ā
Adaās eyes gleamed. āYes! And āā
The server returned with their food. For Ada, a mushroom burger with no cheese and lots of fries. And for Dani, French toast and a small salad with a vinaigrette.
āGod, food is so expensive here!ā Dani complained when the server walked out of the earshot. āUnless youāre getting fish ā which for the record I do like ā then it costs an arm and a leg!ā
Ada shrugged. āWell, when the government heavily regulates our local food sources, and businesses donāt want to ship up hereā¦ā Her mouth twisted and she shrugged again. āWe eat the shipping costs. But Iāve heard that the shipping lane up to Anchorage is getting more popular. Used to be, weād get everything shipped from Vancouver or Seattle.ā
Dani, who had grown up smack dab between New York City, Philadelphia and Baltimore on land colonized partly for its fertility, could only shrug back. She had always been in the center of food and shipping. āThat sucks.ā
āYeah. But all this talk about food made me remember we were talking about things to do in the summer!ā
āOh?ā Dani said, taking a bite of her French toast.
āI like to go on sunset picnics. Dawnās are pretty too, obviously, but then the daytime hits and thereās hardly any chance to see the lights.ā
āThe aurora borealis?ā
āYeah. I, of course, have seen many,ā they said smugly. āBut I never get tired of them.ā Ada took another bite of their burger. āI heard this year, 2024, is going to be especially pretty and strong. Magnet cycles or something.ā
āIāve always wanted to see one,ā Dani admitted. āMy cousin in New Zealand once saw the southern one ā the australis, I think? And didnāt shut up about it for weeks.ā
āWell, weāll have to go and see some.ā Ada smiled shyly.
Dani smiled back. āSounds like a plan.ā
They chatted as they ate, and Dani enjoyed herself so much that she suggested they stay for dessert.
āBest not,ā Ada said, genuinely remorseful. āLooks like weāre due for another storm.ā She pointed a thumb at the window.
āOh snap! That reminds me. I have to go to Margieās Materials before they close.ā At Adaās bemused look, she explained, āIām making curtains. To block out the noise from the wind and I guess now to block out the summer sun.ā
Ada nodded. āYeah youāll need them. Mention my name, she might knock off a dollar or two. We go way back.ā
Dani beamed. āThanks, Ada! Text me!ā
She was still smiling as she paid her bill, picked up the material, and drove all the way home.
āāā
Of course, this was the one time that winter that the storm lasted for more than three days. On days Dani had to work, she woke up early, drove incredibly slow to work, hands gripped tight on the wheel, practically slid over the road, ice inches thick. Otherwise, she stayed at home, cursing at all the streaming services that were unavailable, and the frequent power outages. She did a lot of reading and sewing by candlelight and by the window. It was not the best thing for her eyes, but as a friend back home liked to say, boredom was the mind killer.
What she most enjoyed was texting with Ada, when the signals permitted. They were quite sweet and funny, and helped her create increasingly bizarre meals as her food supplies dwindled.
Dani
<<I swear my fridge was full just a few days ago. But I just donāt like driving out in this weather. And on a workday, by the time I get out, either the store is about to close or Iām so tired I just wanna go to bed!>>
Ada
<<I know what you mean lol. I live closer to my work than you do but further from Rottmanās. It sucks.>>
Dani
<<Yes! And really, theyāre not that far! If it was warmer out, Iād walk>>
Ada
<<And I would walk 500 miles, and I would walk 500 more. To be the nb who walked a thousand miles to bring food to your door>>
Dani
<<šā¤ļø>>
Ada
<<Wait, actually do you live far? Maybe we can still have lunch together.>>
Daniās heart skipped the beat. Her maman did always say romance bloomed fast out in the country. She texted her address before she could lose her nerve.
Ada
<<Nice, Iām less than a five minute drive to your place. Iāll bring some home cooking. Lunch tomorrow sound good?>>
Dani
<<Omg youāre too amazing. Thank you!!! ā¤ļø >>
Casting her eyes around the house, Dani felt renewed vigor for her projects. āI have to show Ada my magnum opus when she gets here!ā
Outside, a gust of wind blew especially hard, as if in an agreement.
āāā
Dani expected Ada around noon ā but had yet to hang up her curtains.
A text came through.
Ada
<<Truck wonāt start, Iāll be a little late.>>
Dani
<<No worries! Iāll put some candles at the window so you know which house is mine if it gets snowy again. My porch light is broken.>>
She started hanging the curtains all around the house, working double time. But as she was short and did not trust the chair she used a stepladder all that much, she was still very slow.
By the time the very last one was finished, her phone said it was 12:17.
Outside the wind started whipping again, and she neither saw a car coming up her street or anybody off-roaring in the snow planes and the low foot hills behind her house, encircling the ocean and bay.
Which meant she probably still had enough time to put all her candles out. Her family had always prized appearing perfectly ready for guests. Dani kept the habit up, because she enjoyed feeling organized. She drew away each curtain from the windows, and placed a candle on the sill. She missed summer, so she had all the more tropical scents out.
Just as she was sitting out her favorite piƱa colada candle, the wind cleared away from her eastern window, and she saw a large shape out back. Was that ā¦
āHoly crap,ā she breathed. āA polar bear!ā
She knew they lived in the area, of course. As per her coworkers advice, she kept her trash in the garage and only set it out the morning before garbage trucks came by.
āThey eat ANYTHING,ā Barry emphasized. āPolar bears would be happy to eat your trash. Or,ā he wiggled his fingers, āyou!ā
Dani had rolled her eyes at the time, but had listened, and was now glad for it.
The animal was huge ā possibly 5 foot at the shoulder. And it was dragging something?
A thought struck her, and Daniās blood turned ice. She hadnāt heard from Ada in a while, and theyāve been talking about, walking to her house just yesterday.
She grabbed her phone out of her pocket. No answer. Called Ada. No answer. Call Ada. No answer.
Her gut roiled as the beast got closer to the house. There was even something red in the trail following the bear.
She tried calling again, but her service went out. Desperately she typed out,
Dani
<<Thereās a polar bear near my house! Please tell me you arenāt walking!>>
But just as she was about to hit send, the polar bear stopped right next to her window. She ducked around the window.
And suddenly there was no polar bear anymore. Instead, there stood Ada, adjusting their kuspuk, hat and mittens, shivering occasionally. And the thing behind her was a sled with a bundle on top. It was leaking red, but instead of blood, it was just a jam jar, fallen over and cracked open, dripping.
Dani could only gape.
Apparently satisfied with their looks, Ada pulled the sled a little further, out of her sight.
Oh God. Was she going to let them in? Maybe she had imagined it. But it was so cold! Plus, kuspuks were about as warm as sweatshirts ā pretty good for weather over 40 degrees but nowhere near warm enough for a day like this. So something was definitely wrong. But she couldnāt just leave Ada out there! Even if she was a polar bear before, she certainly wasnāt one now.
Knock, knock, knock!
No time to hesitate now!
Swallowing down the rush of rmotion she weathered the last few minutes, Dani flew to the door. āAda!ā She plastered on a smile.
āDani!ā They answered back, their smile real, spider bite piercings glinting in the sun.
Daniās heart skipped a beat.
And the wind smacked her in the face and invaded the house. āCome in, come in! Do you need help bringing the food in?ā
āNo,ā Ada said, grabbing the sled one-armed. āIām good.ā
Daniās heart fluttered again. That sled looked heavy. Still, she scooted around her tall date and grabbed the leaking jam jar. āDonāt want to spill in the house!ā She tittered.
Ada covered their mouth with their other hand. āOh, I didnāt even see that come. Dang it! That was my last jar of nagoonberry jam! Aata - my Dad - wonāt share anymore of his.ā
āNagoonberry? And how did you get here? I donāt see a car.ā
āMy truck still wonāt start, so a friend dropped me off down the street.
They hadnāt come in the direction of the street.
āAre you insane? Itās single digits out there!ā
Ada shrugged asshe finished shaking off her snow pants - the last of her winter clothes to go. āDarling, maybe Iām just built different.ā
Dani couldnāt help but laugh. In more ways than one! āOkay, so what did you bring me, muscles?ā
Ada pulled a large basket out of a snugly wrapped blanket, which in turn had been wrapped in a tarp. āTo keep the ice off, but the cool in,ā they explained. The basket was woven tightly, wide and low, with a huge a huge lid, topped by a carved fish, probably made of ivory or bone.
āSo, I hope youāre not too hungry, because I wanted to give you a little lesson before we eat.ā
She nodded. āAre you gonna tell me about the nagoonberry?
Ada waved their hand. āAll good time.ā They pulled two Tupperware containers and stuck them in the freezer. āFor later.ā Finally, they opened up the basket, and began laying out the food.
āSo I was mostly raised up in Utqiagvik, with my aakaga, my mom, until I was about 14-ish. My parents divorced when I was little. Iād see Aata in the summers and sometimes winter break if the weather was mild. Then momās writing career finally took off ā remind me to bring a couple copies over sometime ā and she had to go on a tour. So I moved in with Aata!ā
āLet me guess ā thatās when you started being interested in making food?ā
āYou bet! I mean, I knew how to heat up a pizza or make cookie dough. But Dadās budget was a little tighter, and heās a lot more connected to his people, so⦠yeah. Aaka and I are IƱupiak ā thatās the dual form of IƱupiat, which is āā
āI know what a dual form ā is!ā Dani said excitedly.
Ada lifted their eyes brows, but continued. āFair enough! Well, Aaka was not very traditional when I was growing up. She had to attend a lot of church as a kid, and she spent a lot more time with her fatherās family than her motherās. I think she was still sorting herself out from that, you know? But anyway, Dad is very Yupāik. Not dual form for that, by the way,ā they flashed a smile. āThe plural is just Yupāik, we donāt really conjugate it anymore.ā
āIs this going to be Yupāik food?ā
āYou bet! You say you like sushi āā
āOh yeah,ā Dani confirmed, eyes gleaming.
Ada chuckled. āWell, then youāre definitely going to like this. More protein, less filler, all local.ā They pulled off the lid. āYou seem to tend towards sweet-and-sour foods more than anything, and you mentioned wanting to eat more protein.ā They smiled shyly. āSo I took that into account. Iām going to introduce you to qassaq.ā
Once again, Dani was speechless. Both because she was touched and in awe of the gesture, and because she didnāt know what that meant.
Ada mustāve seen her her face, because they started grabbing dishes out of the basket. āOkay! So this is not the most comprehensive introduction to Yupāik cuisine, and I did end up going to the grocery store for some ingredients, but I figured we could ease into it.ā
āThis,ā they held up a small casserole dish. āIs modern assaliaq. Itās a fried fish casserole with mostly bulb and root type veggies. Thatāll be our main course. Iām going to heat it up in your oven, if you donāt mind.ā
Dani shook her head and took the assaliaq, mouth dry. All this, for a second date? āHow hot?ā
Ada told her, then continued āThis, if you dare,ā they smirked. āis cissāuq. Much more traditional, and a bit of a delicacy.ā
Dani sniffed. Even wrapped up, its scent was strong and inviting. āWhat is it?ā
āItās fermented herring. Pulled it out right before I found out my truck wouldnāt start.ā
āIt definitely smells sweet!ā
āIf you enjoy this, then I think youāll really like Tepa. But, thatās more of a summer food, remind me to show you later.ā They moved on. āThis is tepcuaraq, which is fermented frozen salmon. We can dip in some seal oil!ā They set the container aside, with a little tureen on top. āAnd finally ⦠drumroll, please!ā
Dani happily obliged, giggling.
āIce cream! Just in case you do want dessert. I wasnāt sure what youād like, so I bought Neapolitan.ā They grinned, a little sheepish.
After a moment, all Dani could say was, āI am blown away. You made all of this?ā She gestured all around the kitchen as she put the ice cream in the freezer.
Ada smiled, still bashful āI really enjoyed talking with you, Dani.ā
āI feel so unprepared!ā Dani joked. āBut I really like talking to you too.ā She felt the blood rush to her face. āI hope you arenāt expecting to go home with leftovers, because I really want to try everything!ā
āāā
Dani wasnāt sure if sheād ever eaten so much in her life. āYou eat like this every day?ā She asked, dipping another filet into the nearly gone seal oil. Another bite couldnāt hurt.
āI mean, not usually when Iām working. The counseling center is great, but I donāt normally pack a ton just for one meal. Iām a snacker, so I make a bunch of little stuff on the weekends and eat it throughout the day. But you canāt snack all day for a date!ā
āHow is that? By the way, donāt you guys counsel like, everyone from miles around? That must get a little bit conflict of interest-y with everyone being so tight around here.ā
Ada shrugged. āI mean, I like helping people. Especially kids. On Thursday and Fridays the Center sends me to both of the schools to check up more personally, in case parents donāt want to bring them in.ā They shook their head. āItās like no one remembers how tough it is to be a kid sometimes.ā
āI know!ā Dani fumed. āBack home, a little girl was brought in after burned her foot when she put it on the stove top.ā Both winced. āNot only were the parents careless, but they didnāt understand why she nearly screamed herself blue! It was the most painful thing that little baby had ever felt. Itās like they forgot everything is new.ā
āExactly.ā Ada nodded.
Dani couldnāt stop smiling. A pretty date, good food, and excellent conversation. She didnāt want this to end. āDo you wanna watch something?ā
āSure! Have you seen Dungeon Meshi?ā
Dani shook her head. āIsnāt that on Netflix? I think my friend just started.ā
āLetās watch that! I think it features cooking and fighting.ā
Laughing, Dani grabbed two bowls and two spoons. āEverything is food with you, huh?ā She grabbed the ice cream and a scoop. She could probably fit in dessert. āSo why arenāt you a cook?ā
Ada laughed too. āI tried for a year! But I like to take my time while cooking. I just couldnāt keep up at any of the restaurants. So I eventually got my psych degree.ā
āYeah, the restaurant business is tough. I do not miss being a waitress.ā Dani handed Ada their half of the ice cream, with most of the chocolate and some of the strawberry. Dani took most of the vanilla nd the rest of the strawberry. āHey, doesnāt Alaska have its own type of ice cream or something?ā
Ada nodded as she pulled up the show. āMhm. We call it akutuq, Inuit or Alaskan ice cream. Itās kinda like this?ā She held up her bowl. āIn that itās a cold mix of sweet and fat. You have to try it. But I used up all my berries, so youāre not getting any soon. Though Lou still owes me ā wait. I doubt xe has any either. Ugh.ā
āAnother summer treat?
āWeāll have to see,ā Ada shrugged. āOh well. You ready to watch?ā
āāā
By the time the two had reached the second to last of the episodes released - they kept one-moreing it straight through episode six - it was quite dark.
āLet me give you a ride home,ā Dani said. āI canāt believe I didnāt think of it earlier.ā
Ada snorted. āYouāre silly. But yeah, Iād be happy to save the trip.ā
Dani dashed out to start the car, and they finished episode seven.
After both had finished redressing - for if the trucks heat suddenly failed, they did not wish to be cold ā Dani drove her home. The sky was briefly clear, and they could see the moon setting on the sea.
It looked like a fairly normal home, even with an absolutely true part-timeā polar bear living there. Dani did not see any polar bear paraphernalia. Not even a Welcome mat with paw prints in the pattern. She shrugged mentally and and gave Ada a kiss on the cheek.
Judging from their bashful reaction, they really liked it. With a wave goodbye and a āText you later!ā They grabbed the sled from her truck bed and rushed in the door, narrowly avoiding a particular vicious torrent of wind.
Dani played some instrumental music on the slow ride back, truck occasionally rocking and sliding against the onslaught of wind and ice. She hummed along, in between growls of frustration.
It had been kind of stupid to invite someone new over her own house, when emergency services could take a while to respond, for a second date. It had been monumentally stupid to invite a known anthropophagous bear into her house.
But God, Ada was cute. Dani was surprised they hadnāt kissed during their long date. Had it really been six hours? Dani had trouble enjoying that amount of time with any of her previous partners ā and she had been thinking about marrying her ex-boyfriend!
Ada was witty, and sweet, and quite cuddly. And God, could they cook! The food they made was delicious, and made Dani feel brave and adventurous. Their shoulders were to die for, and Dani didnāt think she had felt that warm since last summer.
She shook her head. āIāve got it bad.ā
And what did this mean magically? Were all the things her grandparents worried about real? Was the Evil Eye real? Should she start wearing a cross? Was God real?
Then Ada popped up in her head again, and her worries melted away at thought of her cute date. Daniās existential crises could wait until she got home.
āāā
Both Ada and Dani were busy with work, but they made time to see each other at least every Saturday ā often extending all the way into Sunday.
Spring was slow to come, but as the weather warmed from āImmediate frostbiteā to only āYou really just need one pair of mittens to go outsideā Ada delighted in showing off the beauty of town in the spring time. They walked around Swan Lake, pointing out the animalsā coats shifting to summer morphs, and the occasional bits of green fighting their way to the surface. They worked out together most days, and Ada would often fill Daniās fridge up with food, but especially qassaq.
The sunlight increased every day and Dani loved it. She missed the easier weather back home, the earlier flowers, and the perfect days of May, but Dani was enjoying her break from home far more. It was worth it.
Daniās hair, which she usually kept straightened, was starting to get on her nerves. The static electricity from the cold certainly did not help.
Dani
<<Ugh, I wish I had remembered to bring the good straightening stuff. I bet it will cost me an arm and a leg to get it shipped up here.>>
Ada
<<Darling>>
<<We do have hairstylists>>
Dani Scoffed.
Dani
<<Babe. No offense, but your hair is straight>>
Ada
<<Darling>>
Ada liked to double text for affect.
Ada
<<Where do you think my cousin Kayla and her mom got their hair done?>>
Dani had met their cousin when she came to visit Adaās dad, Greg, for the first time. Delighted to finally meet her, Greg celebrated by cooking a little feast. The three stuffed themselves full of qageq, cuakapaq and tamukassaaq, which they ate like if chips were chewy.
While they played Sorry!, relatives stopped by to chat. They would then see Dani, and then the little chat would last at least half an hour while they introduced themselves and told at least one embarrassing story about Ada.
Dani quite enjoyed it, though by the end, she was a little exhausted. It was the first time sheād been on the other end of the dynamic.
One of the other relatives, a very old man, had referred to Ada by a different name a few times, but his son, whoād been with him, smiled apologetically. āHe gets confused sometimes.ā
Kayla had been the adorable daughter of Cousin James and his wife Kendra. She and her mom had most definitely not had she and her maman most definitely did not have hair as straight as a pin. In fact, Kendra had tried to talk to Dani about her hair, but then Gregās cat Hobbes had knocked her glass off the table. By the time everything had been cleaned, the little family had to go because it was a school night.
Dani
<<All right, Iāll bite>>
A little part of her wanted to ask if this is where they got their fur done as a polar bear.
Ada
<<Guys & Gals Inc.>>
Dani checked out the next day, and was pleasantly surprised at their work. For the first time in over 15 years, she let herself be talked into a natural hairstyle, instead of straightening it. Maybe all that talk about reconnecting from Ada had gotten to her.
Sabrina, her stylist, was mixed Yupāik and Black, and very chatty but in a welcoming way. āSo why did you straighten it for so long?ā She said, working on another bead. āIt seems like you took care of it, I donāt see too much damage, but thatās a long time!ā
Dani considered the question for good moment. āMy hometown, back in New Jersey, was almost perfectly half and half black andwhite when I was growing up. Itās a little different now, but thereās pretty much the same ratio between black-and-white.ā
Sabrina was nodding.
āBut my family is from Dominica ā NOT the Dominican Republic ā so we were pretty different from the other black folk already there. My parents have accent, we eat goats and organ meat, and with my Papa away for work a lot, no one could drive us kids around. I just wanted to be,ā Dani tried to find a better word. āNormal.ā She winced.
āSo you hung out with more white kids?
āYes. Jordan ā my brother ā didnāt really care, but I did. And to be normal āā
āYou have to be like everyone on TV, AKA, mostly white people.ā
Dani felt small. āYes. After a while, it just became habit. And my mamanās half Kalinagoā§ , so her hair is just wavy.ā She sighed. āWhen she had to learn how to deal with all this,ā Dani gestured to her own hair, āshe had quite a lot to say.ā
Sabrina chuckled. āSounds like your mom should have thought of that when she married your dad. Because you have beautiful, definitely curly, 4A hair.ā Sabrina squeezed her hand comfortingly on Dani shoulder, āIn any case, hon, better late than never. Look at yourself!ā
Dani looked up, and gasped.
She hadnāt been sure if sheād been able to pull off the hairstyle as an adult, but she had wanted it all the same. Her scalp had always been sensitive, and she avoided tight braids when she could.
Instead, she had opted for long twists, stabilized by beads of bone and baleen, the latter of which had a stripe of golden paint in the middle of each bead.
She felt gorgeous. Even if she never wore her hair like this again, she knew she treasure the beads forever.
Dani was still feeling gorgeous by the time she got home. But she was also exhausted.
Staying still for several hours with genuinely hard work! Ada had been knocked out all weekend when she got her hand kakiniit done. She flopped onto the couch after lighting a candle. She looked at the time on her phone. It was three hours until six⦠That meant she could have an hour to snooze, an hour to cook, and then she should be ready! Dani set an alarm on her phone. A little nap wouldnāt hurt.
āāā
Dani was at a restaurant, alone. She kept ordering qassaq and quaq dishes, but the polar bear waiter kept bringing foods that were further and further away from what she was ordering. From sashimi to grilled chicken and on and on, until the waiter lifted the lid to her plate, and it was a lettuce leaf vegan burrito.
In between all that, the polar bear brought up a ringing telephone, set it down, and left it on the table.
She would pick up, or immediately hang it up, but after what felt like mere moments would pass, it would ring again. In exasperation, she picked it up and threw it away. There was a crash, but finally the ringing was far enough away that it stopped bothering her.
āDani!ā Someone in the restaurant called. āDani! Wake up!ā
Dani whirled around, but couldnāt seem to locate the voice.
CRASH!
With the start, Dani woke up to see her candle on the floor, burning, her door was off its hinges, her phone was still ringing on the other side of the room, and for half a second a polar bear stood at her doorstep.
Then a flash, and it was Ada.
The fire caught onto Daniās sock. She ripped it off, and beat the blaze on the floor with it.
When she looked up again, sock and floor out but still smoking, Ada was running over with a pot of water from the kitchen. She dumped it onto the smoky mess.
Heart beating wildly, Dani caught their eye. And started giggling.
Ada tried to keep their face straight, but soon started giggling with her, both falling back onto the couch and relief and the stupidity of it all.
āI can reattach - hehe ā the hinges,ā Ada said, after they mostly finish laughing. āAre you okay?ā
Dani was not done laughing. āJust ā hmheehm ā Bam! And youāre there,ā she kissed Ada, then giggled a bit more. āMy hero!ā
Blood rushed to Adaās face. āYeah, yeah. Your hair looks pretty, by the way. The beads are a nice touch.ā
āHeehmhm ā you just like them because your cousin carved them.ā
āHow did you know Josie makes beads?ā
āWell, the little stand at the hairstylist had a blurb about her, and from there it was a lucky guess. You have a lot of cousins.ā
Ada smiled. āYou got me there.ā Their face turned serious for a second. āActually, Iāve been meaning to talk to you about something.ā
āOh?ā Daniās heart raced. Did Ada realize that she had seen her as a polar bear today? Could they both finally come clean?
Ada took a shuddering breath. āYeah, so, Iāve been thinking, and⦠Iām going to change my pronouns.ā Daniās trepidation fell, but then turned to excitement. āAwesome! What are you thinking? Neo pronouns? I played fae/faer in college. Or xe/xir? My friend uses those. Or āā
Ada looked a little overwhelmed. āNo, no. I was just thinking she/her. Like, Iām going to try both they/them and she/her for a while.ā
Dani hugged her. āThanks for telling me. I have a question for you too.ā She had actually been planning on asking this at dinner, but now felt right.
āOh?ā Ada said, slightly mocking.
āYeah, oh. Listen, do you want to be my themfriend?ā
Ada kissed Dani. āHell yeah.ā Then her stomach rumbled. āIām guessing you didnāt make dinner?ā Her stomach rumbled again. āBecause Iām starving.ā
āYeah, next time I say Iām cooking, I wonāt get my hair done first. How about I pick up Chinese, and you get my door. Thank you, by the way.ā
Ada waved her off. āIt was no problem. Now go get me some General Tsoās!ā They got up to get the tools from underneath Daniās sink.
āAs you wish.ā
āāā
āDarling?ā
āHm?ā
āThereās a festival up in Utqiagvik, where my aakaga, my mom lives. Do you want to go?ā
āSure! Iād love to hear more embarrassing stories about you. Iām sure your aaka has tons.ā
āUgh, why do I love you?ā
āBecause Iām cute. Now hand me some of that arumaarrluk.
āāā
It had just been getting into light jacket weather in QikiqtaĔruk when it was time to fly up to Utqiagvik.
āItās the northernmost spot of the Unethical Spoils of America!ā Ada grinned while Dani worked that one out.
āOh, USA. Okay, good one. Why are you bringing that up while I am packing, my thrilling themfriend?ā
āBecause, my striking sweetheart, it will not be warm enough to wear your pantsuit.ā She said, pointing out the pantsuit Dani had laid out.
āDonāt you mean my PAN-tsuit?ā Dani grinned briefly as Ada groaned. āAnd for real?ā
āI mean, pack it if you want? Global warming and stuff, I could be wrong, but whenever I go there, itās still pretty chilly. But suits look weird layered, my pretty panwoman.ā
āI think I will, my lovely lesbian.ā Dani stuck out her tongue, and Ada pretended to grab it. She shrieked and tackled her girlfriend to the floor, both laughing.
āāā
Utqiagvik, or Barrow as some of the older people said out of habit, still had snow. Dani wondered briefly if Adaās polar bear form missed it, but she did not ask.
She loved Ada, but knowing the secret ā and knowing that Ada was both keeping it from her and didnāt want Dani to know ā was eating her up inside. And she was determined to have a good time ā and if the opportunity arose, and the time felt right? Then sheād bring it up!
After an exhausting few flights ā they had to fly south to Anchorage to catch a flight to Utqiagvik ā Dani was ready to fall asleep. She was still adjusting to incredibly long days, and the solstice had just passed.
Thankfully, Adaās mom Barbara was waiting for them at the airport. She gave her child a hug and a kunikāµ , and then turned to Dani. āYou must be the girlfriend Iāve been hearing so much about!ā She opened her arms once more.
Dani hugged the woman back. āHi Ms. Stevens! I just finished reading book 6, and Iām itching to find a copy of next one! Ada doesnāt want to give me hers!ā
Ada squawked in indignation. āAaka, thatās not true! I losā I mean, I lent it out to someone else. Iām sure ⦠Barry will give it back soon!ā
Adaās mom rolled her eyes. āPlease dear, call me Barbara. And I have extra copies to give you both so that Ada can ālendā out a few more.ā She winked.
āAaka!ā Ada whined.
āāā
Somehow, it was even brighter in Utqiagvik, then QikiqtaÄ”ruk, despite the extra fog. But that didnāt stop the whaling festival, Nalukataq.
A lot of the butchering was already done, so the whales were fresh and ready to eat, and people were clearing out their freezers for any bit of last yearās catch.
Since everyone there was a fan of snacking all day, Dani was soon stuffed. As a newcomer, the whale guts and flippers were offered, and then there was the coffee and the goose and the caribou soups. And of course, the frybread! It was a delicious medley.
Ada happily introduced her to her maternal family, and friends from before she moved. They ran into many of them, because virtually the whole city had turned out for the festival.
There were so many vendors selling beautiful combs, baskets, parkas, kuspuks, embroidered boots, and so many other beautiful things. Dani ended up buying a basket for herself (topped by a polar bear), an arctic fox carving, and a baby blanket embroidered and lined with rabbit fur. It was ridiculously soft and fluffy.
Her friend Annika, who she was going to see on her trip back to New Jersey the following month, was due August, and she figured it made for a great baby gift.
Barbara winked when she saw the baby blanket, and Dani tried to explain herself, but Barbara just poked her in the side. āCome on, dear. You should see Ada at the blanket toss. Itās what the festival was named for, after all!ā
The activity so far had been fun, but more expected, like prayer at the church, singing, storytelling, there would be dancing later, and the distribution of meat between family. Adaās cousin Malik had done the majority of the hunting this year, but Ada promised to come help in 2025.
The songs were lovely, but sounded off to Dani, who been hearing a lot of Yupāik the last couple months.
āYes, itās like Spanish and Portuguese, or so Iām told,ā said Barbara, as they strolled over to the blanket toss. āYupāik and IƱupiaq. Theyāre fairly different, despite being relatively close. I couldnāt understand Greg when he slipped into Yupāik, Iāll tell you what!ā She chortled.
āDo you miss having Ada up here?ā Dani asked quietly. Being around Barbara reminded her of her maman.
āOf course. But theyāre happy in QikiqtaÄ”ruk, and Iām happy here, and they come visit very fairly often. If they,ā here she raised her eyebrows meaningfully, ā ever were to have kids, I would of course expect to have quality grandma time. But seeing as all involved are adults, we all do as we wish.ā
To cover up for her blush, Dani laughed. āYou should meet my maman, Iām sure you two would have fun, bugging about grandkids.ā
The two arrived at the blanket toss. A huge blanket, mapkuq, sewn together out of walrus and seal hide, lay stretched between ginormous whalebone stands, with a host of people surrounding the edges.
āOkay, Dani, I have to help out now āā she nodded over to the tarp, where a few spots around could still be seen ā āBut why donāt you climb up on my truck! That way you can see my girl best.ā
Dani, excited because she still wasnāt quite sure what to expect ā she hadnāt spoiled herself at all ā clambered up the red truck and situated herself upon the roof.
First came the captains. All but the oldest, who held a cane, got up on the mapkuq, and took their turn.
One, two, three bounces, and then four! The naluaqtit, the pullers, would pull the mapkuq taut, and up would go the captains.
Being generally older and serious, they would perform as straightforward a jump as possible, with minimal kicking, but by the end, even the most of dour of the nalukatat, blanket dancers, would land back upon the mapkuq, slightly winded, but grinning despite themselves.
Non-pullers were gathered around the mapkuq, which worried Dani somewhat. What if someone fell on them?
After the captains were the wives. āIn old times,ā Dani heard a nearby father tell the little boy sitting on his shoulders, āThey used to toss baleen and tobacco, and other such treats, to show their competency as providers. But today they throw āā
āCandy!ā Squealed the little boy, leaning past his fatherās head as he reached for the tossed candy. The father, nearly bowled over by his sonās excitement, chuckled and gently warned the boy to be careful.
To Daniās relief, the boy obeyed, and the two moved closer to the candy rain.
The last of the wives, who seemed young and athletic, hopped up on the map with clear excitement bubbling under her skin. She held a bag of candy, but unlike her predecessors, seemed to have something more in mind.
The young woman whispered to the leading naluaqtiq. He nodded, and then the woman went to the center of the blanket.
This time, the naluaqtit seemed to lift the mapkuq with an extra heave, and on that final bounce, the young woman went sailing into the sky.
She twirled the bag of candy by its bottom, high above her head and whooped, much to the delight of the entire crowd, Dani included. The candy went far and wide. Then she when she landed, the naluaqtit sent her up again! This time, she did a backflip and landed in a curtsy. Everyone cheered. From their reaction, it appeared the captainsā wives usually did not do such things.
Next step was apparently amateurs. Three separate people accidentally bounced off the mapkuq and into the crowd ā who caught them quite readily. Dani realized they were so close so they could catch any accidental crowd surfers. The mapkuq was held on hard ground, so that the naluaqtit could hold it steady. Which meant a terrible landing for any who werenāt caught. Dani was just glad she didnāt have to rush into action.
Someone called for any new volunteers, and Dani thought about it, but ultimately held off. Between her full stomach, and the fact that she didnāt know many people, she felt it would be best to hold off. Maybe next year.
Next year? A small part of her whispered.
Shut up, a larger part whispered back.
Finally, she spotted her themfriend and cheered.
They strode up to the mapkuq confidently, with a few wolf whistles and whoops in their wake.
āAda!ā
āAyo! Itās the champion!ā
āWe missed you at the Olympics!ā
Ada smirked and shrugged off their attention.
The crowd stood at the ready.
The blanket bounced one, two, three times. She went up. A simple jump. Then to Daniās awe, they flipped not once ā not twice ā but thrice.
They were spinning, so tight that it was like Dani was looking at a ball.
Only their braids, whose fur wrappings were coming loose, flew freely as they soared higher, higher, higher ā nearly skimming the clouds it seemed ā and then hurtled down.
Daniās breath caught in her throat her girlfriend approached the mapkuq. Would she fall, just like that?
Then the last second, her legs shot out, the mapkuq arose to meet her feet and up she went again. Two barrel rolls, a backflip, and on the last flip, Ada unfolded herself a little early and landed like a surfer. She lifted her arms and whooped.
The city went wild. Dani went wild. She launched herself off the truck and flew over, grasping Adaās face and kissing her in front of the roaring crowd.
She had the coolest girlfriend in the world.
āāā
Barbara was incredibly proud of her child, and was bragging all the way back to her place after the dayās festivities ended. She stopped to breathe for a second, and Ada was about to get a word in edgewise, when Barbara turned to Dani, who was riding shotgun.
āAda is great at all sort of sports. They mustāve been practicing quite a lot at your little gym ā the Lord knows no oneās pulled that level of a trick for a while.ā
āAaka,ā Ada pleaded, blushing.
āāā
āSo you were in the Winter Olympics and you never told me?ā Dani poked Ada in the side. They were walking at dusk, the cool air blowing off the water just this side of kuspuk, not coat.
Ada laughed. āItās not the Olympics youāre thinking of, Iām surprised I forgot to tell you.ā A pause, then, āI won third place in the 400 m dash in the Summer 2016 Olympics.ā
āReally?!ā
āNo, no,ā They said, and laughed. And then yelled when Dani poked them in the side once more. āOkay, okay! I used to do some jumps in the World Eskimo ā Indian Olympics, the WEIO¤, in Fairbanks. I went for the first time with my dad, competed two years later. I didnāt go during Covid, and between this trip and then the trip to NJ,ā they squeezed her hand, āwhich Iām very excited about ā I havenāt been able to go to one in a while. But maybe we can go, next year!ā
There was that dreaded phrase again. Next year.
Dani swallowed around the lump in her throat. āWas that the only kind of jump? The nalukataq?ā
āNope. But I mostly did stuff like the tow jump or the knuckle jump. Iād show you, but one requires a little set up and the other would hurt on the concrete.ā
āIāve never done anything like that.ā Dani confessed after a moment. Then, āBut I used to be point guard on my middle school basketball team. We should totally play some on one when we get to find a court! After you show me these jumps, of course.ā
Ada squeezed her hand. āItās a date.ā
Fog started rolling towards their path, so both turned tail to head back to Barbaraās.
āOh, is that a ⦠rainbow, or something?ā Dani pointed to a ring of light that encircled the setting sun. It appeared white, but the more she stared at it, the more pink and blue appeared at the edges.
āOh!ā Cried Ada, pleased āA fogbow! I havenāt seen one in ages! I think QikiqtaÄ”ruk is too far south for any.ā
āThatās neat! Back in NJ, I saw a triple rainbow once. But never anything like this! It kinda looks like a trans flag. Happy pride month to us!ā
Both giggled, and then a harsh gust of wind swept away both the fog and any desire to stay outside. They hurried in.
Barbara was clacking quite loudly at her keyboard when Dani and Ada walked in ā it no longer threatened to fall off her desk, thanks to Dani bolting it to said desk ā but it still rattled. The woman pulled off her headphones and said, āThereās leftover assaliaq in the fridge, tepa if you want something sweet.ā She put her headphones back on and returned to her clacking.
Dani rushed over to the kitchen. āTepa? Isnāt that the sweet-and-sour stuff you wanted me to try?ā
Ada actually wiggled to fingers. āYes, oh my God. This is going to be good. I knew putting off fishing was a good idea!ā
Tepa was a great way to end a great day. It was less sour than Dani expected, and she would happily admit to stealing some heads off of Adaās plate. That got her an evil glare, but she just stuck at her tongue.
Ada put down her fork. āHey, do you want me to show you another Olympics activity?ā Her tone was innocent. Too innocent.
Despite herself, Dani aquiesced.
They sat upon the floor, and Ada showed her how to arrange herself.
With their right leg bent with her knee up, foot on the floor, and their left leg outstretched, toes of the sky, Ada folded themself around Dani, so that their left leg stretched under the arch of her right, and right foot by her hip. One mirrored the other. Ada and Dani put their left hands on each otherās right ankles, holding one another down. āThen, we cross our right arms, like this, and we pull away from each other.ā
āNo fair, youāre bigger than me!ā Dani stuck her tongue out again. āYouāll push me to the ground.ā
āWell, darling,ā Ada purred, and leaned in even closer. āI could be mistaken, Ms. Basketball-Star, but I think you go to the gym more than I.ā They pulled back, laughter in their eyes. āAnd besides, you win by pulling your opponent towards you. Whoever gets to hit the floor first, etc.ā
Dani saw where this was going. She darted forward and picked Ada on the lips before they could say more. Then before the shock could wear off, she pulled them both down. āI win.ā
Ada licked their lips. āYou most certainly did,ā they said after a breathless moment.
āIs this actually a sport, or is it just your special move to get all the girls?ā
Ada rolled her eyes and kissed Dani back. āOh no,ā she deadpanned, āyou found out my deep, dark secret. My armpull skills bring ALL the girls to the yard, and youāre just the latest in a slew of broken hearts.ā
Dani had to laugh at that. Ada was NOT that smooth. āWell babe, I have to say, your reasoning and methods are solid. When am I getting replaced?ā
Ada pretended to think for a moment before kissing her again. āHm, Iām thinking this time next never. Sound good to you?ā
āDo I have a choice?ā Dani tugged on a strand of Adaās hair.
āNope. Suffer.ā
That earned them another giggly kiss. āLove you, darling.ā
āLove you too, babe. Bon swĆ©.ā
āāā
Something was off. Dani woke up in the middle of the night, alone in bed, dawn rising in the distance. She got up to look for Ada (and maybe grab a little tepa - the snacking lifestyle was rubbing off on her) when she heard voices just outside the lee-side living room window, accompanied by the flickering glow of a candle.
āI just donāt think it is a good idea. Sheās a lovely girl, I really do like her, but you barely know her! Give it time.ā That was Barbaraās voice.
āBut Aaka, I think she get it, you know? Sheās even Indigenous herself, I donāt think sheād reveal anything personal. She knows what itās like to feel different in your own home. Even if we,ā Adaās voice went quiet, ābroke up. Or something. She knows what itās like to be ostracized for things you canāt control. She would not tell!ā
āMaybe. Maybe not. But itās not like sheās planning on staying. You have to protect your heart, Ada.ā
The hurt silence was only interrupted by the low moan of wind on the other side of the house.
They mustāve switched to IƱupiaq after that, because Dani couldnāt catch anything more. She couldāve sworn she heard nanuq a couple times ā she knew that to mean polar bear - but that was about it. Her heart became more and more numb, crouching under the window sill.
Only when she heard a growl did Dani wake up from her miserable trance. She peeked and yes. Ada was a polar bear again.
She heard the sound of footsteps towards the door. Dani flew to their bedroom, and threw herself under the covers.
Of course. Of course, she could not be told. She was just another outsider, a stranger. How could she be anything more?
āāā
When Dani woke up, Ada still wasnāt back.
āOh, she just went fishing with her cousins!ā said Barbara cheerily. āYou know how early dawn is around here! Maybe we can all have some barbecue when they get back. Then Iāll take you up to the airport.ā
Dani nodded, too morose to say much.
Ada did, in fact, bring back some fish, and they fried it up in some seal oil.
Dani tried to muster up her usual enthusiasm, and the food was delicious, but she just felt heavy.
āAre you okay, darling?ā Ada asked, after Dani sighed for the third time.
Caught, she spluttered, āOh! No. Just thinking about something, you know how it is after the adrenaline crashes!ā A half truth was better than a lie, right?
āIf youāre sure.ā
āāā
Things were a little colder between them after that.
Sure, they still ate together, worked out together, and enjoyed each otherās company. But how could she open up to Ada if Ada was not open to her? And why should Ada open up to her if she wasnāt staying? Did she want to stay?
Dani kept promising herself she would talk to someone about it. She was putting up walls and shutting Ada out ā and she hated to see that hurt look flash cross their face. Dani hated hurting them. Dani loved them. But would she stay for them?
Her maman needed her. And it wasnāt fair to expect Jordan to step up all the time. Was she a bad daughter if she likes keeping away from her maman? Was that the reason enough to stay?
Was she just using Ada as an escape?
All that roiled in Daniās gut as they flew across North America.
They caught a flight to Anchorage, to Portland, to Minneapolis, to DC, irritatingly down to Atlanta, and then finally to Newark, where Jordan picked them up. The cheapest flight plan wasnāt always the best flight plan.
Ada, who hadnāt been out of the state since college (partly due to Covid) basically had her face pressed to the window the entire time, especially when they crossed over the desert.
Dani had to laugh. Maybe next time they could stop in Las Vegas. If there was a next time. Dani did not have to laugh anymore.
To her surprise, Jordan looked older. More mature. They texted and called occasionally when she was in Alaska, but Dani had not realized how much he had become an adult. And it didnāt look like a weight on him.
She hugged him, long and hard. āI missed you! She cried. āI swear, you werenāt this tall when I left you.ā
Being a whole 2 inches taller than his older sister and proud of it, Jordan gave her a noogie.
āHey, not the hair!ā
Jordan turned to Ada. āHey,ā he said, holding out a hand.
Ada reached to shake it, but Jordan withdrew his at the last second, sweeping it over his cornrows and lifting his left hand to cup his chin and smirk.
Okay, maybe he had not matured that much.
āYou wonāt help with the bags?ā Jordan said, already grabbing two bags and hauling them towards his backseat.
It was a tight fit in the two hours it took to get back to Cottington.
Being laconic over the phone, but verbose in person, Jordan filled her in on all the family drama that their maman had forgotten to share.
āWhat do you MEAN, Sienna got into Princeton?! Is that why sheās ghosting me? Too good for the likes of a Rowan girl?ā
Jordan sucked his teeth. āMan. I donāt know. She hasnāt been returning my calls or texts either.ā
They all laughed at that.
āThis is it!ā Dani exclaimed as Jordan pulled in front of the house. āLetās hit the hay, I am beat.ā She grabbed both suitcases beside her, excitement beating exhaustion.
The door was unlocked, so she burst into the house. As per usual, her maman was in her armchair. But to Daniās surprise, she actually got up. āDah-nee-el-la!ā The woman opened her arms wide. āOh mon fille, youāre home!ā
āMaman!ā Dani could believe help could not help but get a little teary.
They hugged.
Maman let go first. āNow where is she? That Ada girl? Oh!ā She dropped Dani like she was yesterdayās news. āOh, you must be Ada. You look so strong, so pretty. Though the silver bits in your mouth āā she plucked at one of them, causing Ada to yelp. Mama and sucked her teeth. āWell, nobodyās perfect. Still!ā She turned back to Dani. āYouāll make even more money.ā
Ada looked at Dani wide-eyed over Mamanās head ā all were short, but her maman was by far the shortest ā and Dani shook her head and rolled her eyes. Ada winked in understanding and went back to surviving the womanās chatter. Her stomach rumbled audibly.
āOh yes, and you must be starving! Tell me, do you like hot food? Dani only likes it mild, she mustāve gotten that from her father āā Maman lead them all to the kitchen, whereupon a small feast laid.
āI just thought the island food was like. Fresh fruit and pork. Maybe some fish.ā Ada whispered to Dani, eyes wide, and nose at work.
Dani giggled. āNot Dominican food, babe.ā She grabbed an accra. āTry this first. I told my maman you were a foodie.ā
Maman had brought out the good stuff. She was a great cook, but rarely did she pull out all the stops. She must have caught a train to Philadelphia to get the ingredients this fresh, this flavorful - this Dominican.
There were grilled breadfruit strips, fried in coconut oil, accra to the side ā ready to be eaten with the fish and sweet and spicy goat stew, and of course, the crĆŖpes.
āCrĆŖpes are more of a breakfast food, said Jordan in between stuffing his face. āBut theyāre Dani and Mamanās favorite, so she made them for dinner. She really pulled out all the stops with this one!ā
āYeah, we donāt usually have this much meat.ā Dani said, daintily wiping her mouth with a napkin.
āBut when my Dani comes home after being gone for so long āā
Dani could feel THAT little needle.
ā- and she brings home such a pretty girl, I wanted to spoil her.ā Maman grabbed both Dani and Jordanās cheeks. āNot that they arenāt spoiled enough.ā
āMaman!ā The sibling said in unison.
Ada, who could not get enough of, well, anything, nodded politely, mouth quite full. Her eyes were watering, but Dani could see the excitement there too. Finally, she swallowed. āI must say, Ms. Romain, youre cooking is inspiring. Would you mind sharing the recipes with me?ā
āPlease, call me Patience.ā Maman grabbed Daniās arm. āYou better keep this one. Mon Dieu, she could make up for your lack of charm!ā
Dani flushed angrily, but did not say anything, as did Ada. Her maman was a master at blending a compliment with an insult.
āāā
How could she keep Ada?
āāā
They went to Great Adventure. They went to New York City and saw The Wiz. They went out with her friends and cousins. They visited a friendās petting zoo farm. All these things.
Dani enjoyed herself. She could tell Ada was having a blast.
But every night, Daniās dreams, when she got to see them at all, were plagued with questions. How could she be with someone if they couldnāt be honest with each other? If they couldnāt be themselves with with each other? How could she love them this much and not be sure if she could stay? If she could leave her maman, forever?
Maman had been high energy that first night, but her chronic pain made itself quite known during the following week. Every day, after all their activities (With the exception of their day in NYC. Her papa was home that evening and he brought pizza). Dani would get home and be expected to make dinner. She could make a mean crab farci, but she did not take joy in cooking like her mama or Ada.
Her mamanās pain and love were real, but as Dani grappled with her own dishonesty and commitment questions towards Ada, the old anxieties and irritations of home reared their ugly heads.
Her maman would bark orders at her, and fawn on Jordan the next. She had been away from home for over six months, and yet she had to cook for the household again? God, she loved her maman, but hate and love were not opposites. They were two sides of the same coin.
As Dani trudged upstairs to bed, hands wrinkled from washing dishes, her maman called to her. āDah-nee-el-la!ā
Dani groaned internally and turned around. Her parentsā bedroom was on the first floor. āYes, Maman?ā
āThis house is a mess. You will help Jordan and I clean in the morning.ā
That meant Dani would have to get up at six to clean while Maman supervised and occasionally wiped off counters. Jordan might wake up in time to maybe sweep and take out the trash before he had to go to work.
Dani turned to go. āOui, maman. Bon swĆ©.ā
āBon swĆ©. Je tāaime bien.ā
āMon aussi, je tāaime.ā She meant what she said, but wished she did not.
āāā
Nearly everything went as she expected, much to Daniās displeasure. 6 AM wake up, clean up for a couple hours, and then Jordan took the trash out before he went to work, apologetically smiling. Ada woke up halfway through and joined in, making Dani love her all the more, though Maman looked on disapprovingly.
Their last fun day was to be spent at the beach. Ada didnāt know how to swim, and Daniās hair had just been redone, so they didnāt spend much time under the water. Still, they splashed and got a bit burned - despite using sunscreen, both forgot to lotion their ears - and ate overpriced ice cream and fried Oreos.
āI can feel my arteries wheezing their death rattles,ā Ada said while stuffing another Oreo in her mouth āI need a salad, stat!ā
Dani snorted. āThereās no saving you now. Your palate will forevermore be unclean.ā
Ada died.
Dani slid her remaining Oreos over.
Miraculously, Ada came back to life to take them back just as thunder cracked in the sky.
āSnap, that looks like itās moving in fast!ā Dani said. It wasnāt raining on them just yet, but she heard the pattering of precipitation and saw a sheet of darkness fall and saw a sheet of darkness fall a mile down the boardwalk.
The same direction as her car, of course.
She grabbed Adaās hand. āCome on!ā
Everybody started fleeing, much to the coupleās dismay, the crowd moving against them. Apparently everyone else had parked in the opposite direction.
When the two finally found the car, it was cold and the wind was whipping. A sheet of rain rapidly approached the vehicle.
āBeat you there!ā Ada challenged, and ran to the car.
Dani cursed and ran too.
Ada had already reached the car and was pulling on the doorhandle. They turned to Dani. āCome on,ā they whined. āLet me in.ā
Huffing and puffing to the driverās side, Dani hit the unlock button. But only once, so only the driverās side was unlocked. She slid in.
āJezebel!ā
The rain was only two cars away.
Smiling, Dani unlocked the door.
Ada slid in, frowning. āEvil woman,ā she groused as the rain hit the car.
āI donāt start things,ā Dani flipped her twists over her shoulder. āI just finish them.ā
Ada sniffed delicately. āYou better not leave me out in the cold again.ā
Dani laughed hollowly at the words that reminded her of the questions that plagued her each night. āIām sorry, babe. Letās go to the house.ā
Ada reached for a kiss, and Dani barely returned it. It was too much. She hated seeing the hurt on Adaās face ā so she did not look.
āāā
Their full morning in New Jersey was spent hanging out with her maman and any family who stopped by. With a farewell that part of Dani wished had come sooner, the couple left her familyās house.
Their flight was at 9 AM the next day, and her old friend Annika live close to the Newark airport. As such, she had voluntold her husband Antonio to drive them to the airport the following morning.
So, the two took an Uber to Annikaās house.
āIād take you myself,ā Annika said over the phone, laughing, ābut Iām just too big to fit behind the wheel anymore!ā
It was true. When they arrived at Annika and Antonioās house, the woman had to waddle out. She was tall, but her husband was tall ā tall. Dani did not want to know how big that baby would be at nine months.
āIām not sure that baby blanket I packed is going to be big enough,ā she whispered to Ada from the backseat.
Ada snorted.
āDani!!!ā Squealed Annika as she made her her way down from the porch, carefully.
āNika!ā Dani squealed back, getting out of the car and forgetting her bags. She rushed over and slowed down, just before impact, going in for a side hug and a cheek kiss instead. āHow are you?ā
āAh well, the baby is coming along. It was beating me up earlier, the little stinker.ā The woman caressed her stomach with a slight wince. āIām surprised Iām not lack and blue yet!ā
Dani chuckled. āThatās great and all, but I asked about you, not the kid.ā
āOh!ā Annika smiled. āI feel like a bumper car, I can hardly walk, and I only ever feel like sleeping or crying. But Iām also bored and tired of waiting. Does that make sense?ā
āSorry to interrupt, Dani, but I donāt have the app and the driver wants us to pay.ā Ada butted in, embarrassed.
āOh sorry babe, Iāll go get that.ā Dani squeezed Annika once again and rushed over to the driver, phone in hand.
āSo you are the famous Ada!ā Dani heard her over her shoulder.
āāā
The rest of the afternoon, all three chitchatted and played monopoly, too tired or too pregnant to do much else. Antonio got home and made them burgers ā Annikaās favorite, aside from sushi, which she wasnāt allowed to have due to the fetus.
āI miss it, I really do!ā said Annika, eyes watering.
Antonioās eyebrows rose with alarm.
āAfter the kid is out, Iād love to come up and try some of your qassaq, Ada. It sounds divine!ā
Antonio cast his eyes pleadingly over at Ada.
But Ada never needed any encouragement to share their cooking. āIād love to make some for you! You should absolutely come up, weād be glad to have you.ā They glance to her stomach. āOnce the baby is ready, of course.ā
āOf course!ā Annika said.
Dani could see the relief flooding Antonioās face. āAnd on that note, does anyone want dessert?ā
Ada declined, looking at her phone and saying that she wanted to hit the hay early. She went upstairs with a āThank you, you two! It was nice meeting you!ā Dani was pretty sure her girlfriend was actually not going to sleep just yet, considering this sheepish look on her face. She probably just saw an update notification for a fanfic she liked.
Antonio graciously got both Annika and Dani ice cream, waving off her thanks with a āItās habit now.ā Then he went to bed, probably to actually go to sleep.
Annika was a night owl ā Dani remembered how they both stayed up 37 hours one weekend when the two were eleven, just because they could. Being a medical professional now, Dani winced at the thought. Both had improved their sleeping habits, but to say Annika was cured would be laughable.
āDo you want to watch a movie?ā
āDoes it have many flashing lights? My head is still spinning a bit from the amusement park.ā
There had been a light malfunction on a dark ride and Dani was pretty sure she almost had a seizure. Which would have gotten her stuck in NJ, meaning a bunch of breach of contract, meaning her decision about Ada would have been temporarily made for her. SHE wanted to make the decision. Even if her decision at that moment was to put off said decision.
āItās animated, but I looked it up earlier and some parenting site said itās decently epilepsy safe. Thereās a few fireworks, and some characters made of fire, but no strobing, or big flashy changes!ā
Dani narrowed her eyes. āAre you trying to get me to watch that elements movie again?ā
Annika pouted. āItās like, the best movie of 2023 and you didnāt even watch it!ā
āYou know I donāt watch a lot of kids movies.ā
Annika thought for a moment. āIām pregnant, and you need to see this movie.ā
āYour logic is astounding,ā Dani said dryly. āOkay. Put it on.ā
āāā
Dani had gone into the movie expecting to endure it. Instead, she began to draw ⦠similarities to herself.
By the end, they were both weeping. āItās like me with the farm a couple years ago!ā exclaimed Annika. Then she blew her nose, and offered the tissue box to Dani.
āI think itās like. My maman and I. But nicer.ā Dani took a tissue.
āMhm.ā Annika snatched the box back to herself. āAnd you know,ā her voice suddenly turned sly. āI think somebody in your life is a little like Wade.ā
āOh, shut up.ā Dani balled up her tissue and threw it at Annikaās head, who squawked an indignation. āWhat do you know, anyway?ā
Annika smiled and tapped close to her eye, creepily reminding Dani of the Beldame from Coraline. āMotherās intuition.ā
āIt hasnāt even been born yet!ā
Annika shrugged. āYou canāt help with sneak glances at her, even this far into the relationship. You desperately wanted your mom to like her, which I donāt think she even met any of your previous partners.ā
āThatās more because of her than āā
āAnd it looks like youāre keeping secrets, and itās killing you.ā Annika caught Daniās eye with a long steady look. āThis isnāt just a fling for you.ā
Dani looked away first, unable to hold her gaze. āIām not even sure if I should stay in QikiqtaÄ”ruk,ā she said to the floor. āWhy should I make any drama if I canāt even stay.ā She started to weep.
Annika opened her arms, and Dani nestled into her side. Annika gave pretty good backrubs ā her calluses from work, always scratching Daniās back just right. āLetās not talk about should, or would, or can.ā Annika said. āLetās just talk about want.ā
āI know what I donāt want.ā
āOkay?ā
āI donāt want to let anyone down. But I donāt want to take care of my maman ā Iām 27 for Godās sake! She loved on me the first day, and then it was like I never left!ā She thought for a moment. āPlus I want to keep my girlfriend. She is pretty cool.ā They both chuckled. āAnd I donāt want to leave all that pressure on Jordan. And it feels wrong to kind of leave Ada hanging.ā Dani sighed. āI just donāt know what to do, and itās biting me in the butt. Ada and I had a great time this trip, but I kind of held them at armās length. And Ada definitely saw that.ā
Annika chewed on this. āYour mom doesnāt put things on Jordan the way she does on you, does she?ā
Dani shook her head.
āMaybe you should ask him what itās been like for him, instead of assuming. Either he gets out of it, or he found a way to keep her happy that works for him. Maybe ⦠the workload changes when youāre not here.ā Annika sneezed.
āBless you.ā
āThanks. Anyway, when you start feeling like a family member is a burden āā
āIt means youāre a crap person, and āā
āNo! It means you need time away from them! To reevaluate and appreciate each other and stuff. I got to know my parents and like them a lot better when I moved out for college and stayed out! And you, you never had that. Until now. And with a person who looks at you like you hung the moon.ā Her voice softened. āYou had a terrible taste before this. All your exes were way less fulfilling, and more toxic than nuclear waste. I donāt know what compelled you to get with this person, but theyāre keeper.ā The woman grinned. āEspecially since you still have a gooey look when I say their name. AdaAaAa!ā
Daniās face did not change. She made sure of it.
āAdaAaAa,ā Annika repeated, this time poking Dani in the side.
āHey! Cheating.ā
Annika rolled her eyes like SHE was not the childish one. āAnyway, the only person you need to be worried about disappointing, is yourself. I know you love New Jersey, and me, obviously and me, obviously,ā the pregnant woman put her hand on her own chest. āBut I donāt think itās enough to make you content, let alone happy.ā
āI miss you,ā Dani offered.
āI miss you too,ā Annika squeezed her. āBut itās not like we canāt see each other. And besides,ā she laughed. āWith the time difference, Iām sure the baby will keep me awake long enough to call you, if this kid is anything like me.ā
They both laughed at that.
āOh! Hold on.ā Dani got up and found the gift bag sheād been hiding up in her room. She waved at Ada, who was indeed reading on their phone, and went downstairs. āFor you,ā she said, holding out the gift bag.
She saw the water in Annikaās eyes and she handed over the tissue box as well.
āWhatās this?ā Annika sniffled.
āItās for the baby. From when Ada and I were in Utqiagvik. I saw this adorable booth selling things like this and I knew youād love it.ā
āI do,ā wailed Annika, who hadnāt even opened it and was reaching for more tissues.
āNika. Look in the bag.ā
After a bit more sniffling, Annika finally opened the bag. āOh my God, itās too cute!ā Annika practically shoved some tissues up her nose to avoid getting snot on the beautiful blanket. āMy mom has this cradle her dad carved for her when she was a baby, and she put my brother and I in there when we were babies for pictures and, and, and,ā she blew her nose again. āI am totally putting my baby in there with this blanket. Oh my God, thank you, Dani!ā
Dani just hugged her.
āāā
Dani helped Annika settle on the couch. The doctors had said minimal stairs, and the couch was nice, so the woman slept there most nights.
After helping her friend, Dani went to bed. She had a lot to think about.
āāā
At 4 AM, Dani smacked the alarm.
Ada snorted, but snuggled back into her pillow and went back to sleep.
Dani sighed with relief. She slowly got up and dressed, packing both their things into the car (Annika said she could borrow it), only leaving each of their handbags with change of clothes in their room. Then she grabbed Wawa for breakfast, a last little New Jersey treat before returning to Alaska.
At 5 AM, she shook Ada awake. āBabe, wake up.ā She planted a kiss on her themfriendās cheek. āI want to show you something.ā
Ada stretched and nodded, sleep still clouding her vision, and trudged off to the bathroom. At 5:20, Ada finally got her butt downstairs, where Dani was champing at the bit.
āBabe, come on, weāre going to miss it!ā
Ada yawned as she closed the door, then fixed her eyes upon the Wawa bag. āWhat do you have there?ā She woke up a bit.
āA reward for after we get to the beach. Come on!ā
āWhy are we going to the beach? I donāt think itās safe at right now, it bei dark and all. And you didnāt tell me to get in my swimsuit!ā
āYouāll see. Just come on already! Before it gets hot and you melt again.ā
āIn my defense, itās stupid humid in New Jersey. I donāt know why anyone wants to live here.ā
Both giggled as their flip-flops hit the sand path through the dunes. The birds were singing their sunrise songs, and already catching bits of seeds and bugs.
The couple reached the surf. Dani sat down carefully, cursing herself for not bringing a towel, and beckoned for Ada to sit too. āSo I actually brought you here for two reasons.ā
Ada suddenly looked guarded. āOh?ā
Dani swallowed around the lump in her throat. āYes. First, I wanted to show you the dawn on the ocean. Itās pretty cool, and⦠I know you like sunset picnics back home.ā
Ada smiled. āI do.ā
āAnd⦠I think Iāve been dishonest. And kind of ⦠noncommittal. And I hate that, and I want to respect your time and āā Dani realized she was rambling. āāAnd I know you can turn into a polar bear.ā
Adaās eyebrows almost reached her hairline, and her mouth opened in shock. Whatever she had expected to hear, it was not that. āWhat?ā
Dani felt all the blood rush from her face. āWhen you walked to our second date ā I saw you. Walk up with the sled. And again ā when you broke down my door? Polar bear. And ā and, when you talked to your mom that night after Nalukataq!ā
Adaās face was stone.
Dani panicked. āAnd I think itās totally cool and I didnāt tell anybody and I wasnāt sure if you knew that I know or if youād be mad especially since āā
āSo youāre afraid of me?ā
āWhat?ā The word vomit stopped.
āHave you been afraid of me, this whole time? Is that why you always say yes?ā Ada stood up, hands shaking. Her voice remained quiet. āIs that why weāre dating? Too afraid to tell this giant, man-eating beast no, unless youāre in your home territory?ā Their voice broke. āDo you ⦠not love me?ā
Now what it was Daniās turn to be shocked. āWhat? No!ā She grabbed Adaās hand.
It was the wrong move.
Adaās eyes went impossibly wide with fear, and quicker than Dani could track, they were a polar bear, and Dani was holding air. They turned to run into the ocean, but Dani swallowed her fright at the change and jumped in front of Ada.
āAda,ā Dani worked hard to keep her hands by her side. She desperately wanted to hold her loveās face. Even with the teeth, the fur, the sudden immensity, she saw Ada and those eyes.
āAda,ā she repeated. āI love you. All of you. I just donāt want there to be secrets between us.ā Dani closed her eyes and breathed in Ada, and after a moment, Ada breathed her in too. A kunik.
To the east, dawn bloomed.
Ada transformed back. āI canāt speak when Iām using my Nanuq Atiq, they explained hesitantly. āI ā are you ⦠sure?ā
The tension in Daniās gut roiled into laughter. āBabe, Iām moving to Alaska permanently. What do you think?ā
Tears welled in Adaās eyes. āYou what? Youāre staying?ā
āYou bet, babe. Iāll figure it out with Maman.ā Dani was tearing up too. āSo you better not be planning on getting rid of me.ā
āOkay,ā Ada choked out, laughing between tears. āOkay.ā
They sat silently, watching the sunrise.
āāā
āJordan? Hey,ā Dani said at the OāHare airport lounge. Her arms were crossed over her chest, AirPods in
āWhatās up, Dani? You made it to the airport okay?ā He sounded sleepy but concerned.
āYup! All good on that front. Iām in Chicago. But I wanted to talk to you about Maman.ā
āMaman?ā
āYeah,ā Dani heaved a breath. āYou know ⦠she treats me differently than you, right?ā
A long silence, then, āIf this is about me not helping you clean, Iām sorry, Dani. This was like the one week the cleaninglady couldnāt come in, and they were all these emergencies, and āā
āShe let you hire a cleaning lady?ā Daniās hurt and anger rose up. āShe never let me do that. Said it was a waste of money, didnāt want any strangers in her her house.ā
Jordan was silent for a moment. āDid she not tell you?ā He said quietly, angrily. āThe compensation from the doctor who misdiagnosed her finally came in.ā He cleared his throat. āShe pays for a cleaning lady, a nurse and a meal service now.ā
Dani was burning up. āIām not coming back. Iām staying in Alaska.ā
āWhat?! Listen, I thought she told you. I thought you liked taking care of her!ā
āI literally moved thousands of miles to get away from her!ā She yelled.
The whole lounge looked over.
Ada stood up behind her and squeezed her shoulder. Dani put her hand on top of Adaās, just holding on.
āI ā I didnāt think. Jordan said lamely.
āWhen did she get the compensation?ā
āWhat?
āWhen did she get the compensation?ā
Jordan went silent. āA few weeks before you decided to move. I thought that was why you went. Because it was okay now.ā
āIt was never okay, Jordan. Dani hissed. āI barely survived, keeping things as she liked and perfect for when you and Dad get home.ā She swallowed her fury. āI get to live my life now, Jordan. I love you, Papa and Maman. But Iām disappointed in you all.ā
Dani could hear him crying through the phone. Some big sister part of her wanted to make it stop, hated herself for making her baby brother cry.
But the truth needed to be said.
āI love you, Jordan,ā she repeated. āAnd I always will. Call me if you need me or have a question about Mamanās care. Iām not gone forever.ā
A sniffle. āI donāt think maman is going to get better.ā
Dani pressed her hand to her mouth to cover up her sob. Her breath hitched anyway. āI donāt think so, either. Iāll come help when she ā when it happens. But for now, I need some space.ā
Another sniffle. āOK, Dani. A beat, then, āIām sorry I never stepped in for you. I know she and Papa were always,ā sniff, āharder on you than me.ā
āThanks, J, she said simply. āLove you.ā
āLove you too. Text me when youāre back safe?ā
āYeah. Bye.ā
Ada came around and hugged her tight. āDo you need to go and clean up?ā She asked, nodding her head to the bathroom.
Dani nodded, trying really hard to hold her tears back.
Ada grabbed their stuff, sacrificing their seats to a young couple with two children who had been loudly complaining about the lack of seats and that parents had it hard.
Ada helped her clean up and kissed her when it was done. āYou okay?ā
Dani shook her head and held her forehead against Adaās, just breathing her in. āAbout this? I probably wonāt ever be, not completely. But thank you.ā She leaned back and shook a finger. āDonāt you start psychoanalyzing me, doctor. Conflict of interest.ā
Ada chuckled, their warmth soaking into Daniās heart like a bomb. āIām still working on that doctor part, darling.ā
āOh, so itās all right then.ā
Together, they rejoined the lounge, and resigned themselves to standing. Theyād be sitting for the rest of the day on the plane, anyway.
āāā
To Dani and Adaās delight, the flight attendant informed them that they had been bumped up to first class for their flight straight to Anchorage.
The loud family who stole their lounge seats looked at them with poison in their hearts.
Dani and Ada did not care.
āāā
Dani and Ada had both been busy at work, Dani catching up on her hours and Ada catching up on her patients. It was August when they finally had a time where both were free, neither were tired and it was a clear sky.
āThe long sunsets are going away.ā Dani observed as they walked towards the where the Pacific Ocean became the inlet.
āYes, but tonightās perfect for the for seeing a really good aurora. You ready?ā
āYou bet, babe.ā
The two eventually settled in a clear spot, the wind gently whipping away the genuine heat of that day.
Dani pulled out some curry colombo and crab farci, the spices for which she brought home in her luggage from New Jersey. She was finally getting into cooking for herself.
Ada pulled out some slightly thawed kumlaneq and niinamayak. The niinamayak tasted just right when thrown in with the curry ā and Ada had been working on her spice tolerance.
They ate peace for a while.
Then Ada turned away. āI canāt tell you everything.ā She finally said, face hidden.
āHuh?ā
āI canāt tell you all my secrets,ā Ada said. āSome of them are things I share. My familyās berry patches, I wonāt share with anyone except with any kids I have. The secrets my patients tell me. Even what my dad likes to put in uquq to make it so sweet. But everything I canāt tell you, Iāll tell you that I have to hold back if you ask. And everything else, is yours.ā She turned away to grab a crĆŖpe.
Dani gently put her hand on Adaās shoulder and kissed her. āThank you. Thatās enough for me, babe. Iāll do the same for you.ā Then she handed Ada some jam. āFinally the famous nagoonberry jam! You made me wait months for this!ā
Ada took it and thanked her. āYou ready?ā
āYou bet!ā
The hype was not unfounded. It was naturally sweet ā Dani could tell hardly any sugar was added ā and a little savory. Adaās aata Greg probably couldnāt resist cutting in a little uquq. There was hardly any citrus taste, just enough to heighten the sweetness - it was clearly added by someone who knew their jam. It also tasted slightly of the sea ā there was a good chance Greg had sourced the salt from the ocean to get just the right taste.
āThis is delicious! I canāt believe you would hold this out on me!ā
Ada grinned. āI owed Barry a lot for a favor he did me a couple years ago. I just finished paying it off, then he introduced me to you.ā They winked. āLooks like I owe him again. Better memorize the taste ā heās got one hell of a sweet tooth. You probably wonāt be getting any for a while.ā
āNo, this is mine now. He can get his own,ā Dani said with a devilish smile. She glanced up and - āOh my God! Itās here!ā
The couple laid back on the blanket and watch the aurora dance its way across the sky.
It made Daniās heart feel light, and strange.
She squeezed at Adaās hand. āI think the only thing more beautiful than this is you.ā
Ada spluttered, then smiled and gave her a kunik. āYou're cheesy.ā
Dani gave her one back. āAnd yet it works on you.ā
Ada squeezed her hand and turned back to the lights above them. āTo us.ā
āTo us,ā Dani echoed.
And the aurora danced on.
āāā
This post is VERY long, so I split up the glossary and the explanation. Enjoy!
Glossary
Explanation
The following are footnotes from within the story
ā A dual form is the term that specifically refers to two objects. Like how with English, adding an -s to the end of a noun makes it plural, but IƱupiaq has a way to make it clear that thereās just two nouns, and not one or many.
So one person is IƱupiaq, two people are IƱupiak, and any more than that is IƱupiat. Same q/k/t rules apply to most nouns. The language is referred to as IƱupiaq. The IƱupiat people are neighbors and cousins of the Inuit, but are a different culture entirely. Same thing with the Yupāik.
ā Thereās a cool book called, āThe Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indianā by Sherman Alexie. Itās about a Spokane Indian* boy named Arnold who learns to code-switch (change himself to fit within oneās original culture and that of the majority) to survive going to a better school off his reservation. Itās meant for young teens and up, and itās totally worth the read. Iām pretty sure it was my introduction to modern Indigenous characters - historically, they usually only portrayed in conjunction with early colonization efforts, AKA the cowboy genre and the like, from the point of view of the colonizers.
*Indigenous is a rallying, unifying term for (generally) all peoples originally found in lands that were so heavily colonized that they are now the minority. So the Koori of Australia are Indigenous, but the Akan people of Ghana are not, despite both being colonized. Indigenous in this usage is fairly new. Usually if someone uses that term as a self descriptor, theyāre young. It unifies peoples from all over the world.
Native American is a legal term to describe all peoples with āenoughā blood connection to the Indigenous people of the contiguous United States of America, where the blood quantum is determined by the state and not by actual connection to those cultures. This is a huge problem that legally separates actual Indigenous people from their cultures and rights just because someone(s) in their family married outside the culture. Most Indigenous people do not like to be called this, but would prefer it over slurs or inaccurate guesses.
Indian (or American Indian or Amerindian) is the historical term that many older Indigenous people use as another pan-Indigenous rallying term. While many do not like it or the inaccuracy and bloody history behind calling Indigenous Americans (both continents) āIndiansā, a lot of people were upset when the (USA**) government changed the legal term to Native American. Itās because they did not get a choice in the matter. So many people still use it because they decided itās their word to reclaim (which it totally is). However, mostly Indigenous people within the USA have reclaimed the word - in other areas it is a non-issue or is considered rude or out-dated. And itās more popular with older people.
**Other modern countries in the Americas do/used to call their Indigenous peoples Indians. Some have kept that name (such as Chile, though they say āIndiosā, which is Indians in Spanish), some have not. For example, the Indigenous peoples of modern-day Canada are now called āFirst Nationsā by the Canadian government, but were once called Indians.
So to review: Indigenous is the younger identity word that covers all populations that were colonized and are now a minority in their historical lands. Native American is the legal term as used by the United States for Indigenous peoples originally from nations in the contiguous USA. And Indian is the preferred term by older Indigenous people in those areas. The label āEskimoā is also preferred in a similar fashion for the Inuit people, and more broadly, the Indigenous peoples of Alaska and north/western Canada. See footnote 5 later in the story for the idea in context.
However, the most polite thing to do is to not mention anybodyās ethnicity unless they bring it up themselves. If you must talk about it, then use the most specific terms possible to be polite. Thatās why I mention that Arnold in that book is Spokane, and did not use the very loose term āNative Americanā.
ā§ So thereās the Indigenous Kalinago people of the island of Dominica. They were once called Caribs - and thus the Caribbean Sea was named - but that was from a misunderstanding on Christopher Colombusās part. Carib likely just meant ābrave warriorā. So in 2015, the people legally changed their name to Kalinago, their original name. Kalinago is the plural form, and Karifuna is the singular form. So Dani is Karifuna, and Dani, her maman and her brother Jordan are Kalinago.
āµ A kunik is like a greeting kiss in terms of intimacy. But itās not just for romantic partners. One (or two! It can be mutual!) people will hold their nose close to the otherās skin, and breathe them in. Itās like loving someone so much, one just has to breathe their atiq, their spirit, in. A lot of ***Alaskan Native Peoples practice this, as their mouths were often covered outside during the long winter months (to keep water and warmth in). An āEskimo kissā is a bastardized version of a kunik - it does not usually involve rubbing noses together.
***Alaskan Native is a legal term for the Indigenous peoples of Alaska. They get slightly different rights and restrictions by identifying as such and not āNative Americanā. The Indigenous Hawaiian (Native Hawaiian) people have a similar deal with the USA government. Both Indigenous Alaskans and Hawaiians prefer this legal distinction - while both got the shorter end of the stick, they still have a better deal with the government than the Indigenous peoples lumped under the category āNative Americanā. However, āAlaskan Nativesā prefer to be referred to their individual ethnicities (Yupāik, Athabaskan, etc.) or Eskimo when relevant, and āNative Hawaiiansā prefer āKÄnaka Maoliā, āIndigenous Hawaiiansā or just āHawaiiansā.
¤ This is an example of where older terms, such as Indian and Eskimo, are still used, because both Indigenous groups lumped under those old labels got to choose the name themselves. Despite āNative Americanā and āAlaskan Nativeā (respectively) being the legally correct terms according to the modern USA government, both groups like exercising their autonomy by sticking with the names they chose, despite the terms being legally out-dated. The WEIOās name is a case where tradition and pride combine well.















