#mahadeva

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I actually have a statue of the Shiva Nataraja in my room!

Thank you for the ask! <3

🌧 Share something angsty from your wip.

So, this one is from The Daughter of the Mountains, which is a fic about Durga killing Mahisha and coming into her power. This is set right after Mahadeva tells her about Sati and belief that they are destined to wed.

Gauri hears him out in silence. She is not surprised at this morbid history, nor even at the revelation of their nature - in fact, she startles herself with her lack of fear.

Hara is still talking, low and quiet as ever, the warm timbre of it raising the hairs on her arms. "It is how it is, Gauri," he says, "and what has happened is past. I tell you this so you will never hear it elsewhere and be afraid - I will not put supposed destiny over you. It is only that I mislike being kept in the dark, and this was kept from me for a long time."

"Hari knew, I suppose?"

Hara laughs. It is soft and sad, tinged with acceptance of betrayal, and Gauri knows.

"Perhaps," she says, "he does this so you will not tell me."

"Maybe," Hara shrugs. "He is quaint, like all of us. But I will not keep such things from you."

At least, Gauri thinks bitterly, someone is on my side.

But not in the way she wants. Not in the way they are destined to be.

They sit together in silence for a while. Gauri tries to turn her mind from him - what woman, indeed, would yearn so shamelessly for a man so austere and ascetic? But the more she wills away, the more they come: these distant, unreachable dreams. Her and him, in some shadowed cave upon her frosty home, warm in each other's arms, watching the falling snow. Her and him, hunting for the last of winter's stores, kneeling together to scrape the meat and cure the hide. Her and him, and him and her, together, for all of eternity.

Hara stands, and for a moment Gauri thinks he knows her mind, but then he bows and says, "I will leave you to your training. Do not be afraid, lady. Fate or no fate, there is nothing I will seek from you."

Gauri nods and watches him walk away. What a gentlemanly thing to do! - she is certain there is no dearth of men or asuras (or even devas) who would not have hesitated to take advantage of this situation to lay claim upon her. Her father and brother would not stand for it, but the devas, who upheld order, who were cornered and angry and homeless and lost, would. And then, if they could not be convinced, they would die, and Gauri would wed some stranger still draped in her father and brother's funeral clothes.

In this, Hara is exemplary, like in all other things. He has spared her great troubles and terrible misfortunes. Gauri should be grateful.