Today I’m really tired. The bone infusion I had last night knocked me on my butt. I’ve been in bed a lot. I did manage to take a shower but I feel like I need another one to wake up… and it’s 5pm. lol.
I picked up a Tamagotchi toy for nostalgia sake. I had one in the 90’s. I named this one Kevin. He’s pretty annoying. Ella’s taken over his care because I can barely see the screen. 😂
Anyway, I told her we can have a contest to see how long each of us can keep it alive for. She seems really into it. lol.
This weather has made my skin so dry. Doesn’t help that I have psoriasis. Have had it on and off for pushing 40 years. I have steroid ointments and lotions but it destroys the skin, too. I picked up something called “Dream Cream” at Lush and I’ve been slathering it on and it’s been helping significantly. I’m actually really surprised. I’ve tried many others such as Aveeno, CBD and coconut oil based creams and they just made my poor skin more itchy and angry. I’m hoping this continues to work. I’ll be buying it by the truck load.
Another photo came up in my memories of Ella with Santa when she was 6 years old. We were at Manning Park.
A few other photos popped up of me doing volunteer work on Christmas Eve. One was when I was at the ER in a Vancouver Hospital in 2019. They always have a pretty awesome lights display out front. The other was at a local crisis line in 2020. I enjoyed both but they were also challenging.
I did those after my treatment from early stage breast cancer. I wanted to do a bunch of service work in the helping field to see if I was a good fit for social work - then the plan was I’d go back to school. I also volunteered in the downtown Eastside for about 4 months-ish, too. It was once a week at a drop-in centre. I loved it but between germs and bugs (they had to keep spraying the building), I felt like I needed to burn my clothes every time I left there. My OCD was taking over my desire to help. Which sucks. It was also quite far to go so while it was otherwise a positive experience giving out a lot of food and listening to a lot of stories, I left.
Then the pandemic hit and things got shut down or delayed. I continued with the crisis line until New Years Day 2021 and by that point, I already decided that the social work field was not for me. My neck at that time was bothering me so much and I felt completely rundown. Sitting on the phones for hours at a time was agony. So, I resigned. Ironically, I continued to volunteer with Self Management BC co-facilitating their chronic pain programs. Severe pain was definitely something I was dealing with on a daily basis. Then three months later, my neck broke and the rest is history.
Never did I imagine my life turning out the way it did. It’s been a rollercoaster. I just do what I can instead of dwelling on what I can’t. That doesn’t mean I don’t get sad once in a while. I just try to not stay in that negative place. I still think about going back to school even with this disease. I’d love to take philosophy, religious studies and/or creative writing. Just for the sake of learning.
Ella wants to do a silversmithing class in the New Year. Silversmithing isn’t cheap but I want to encourage her to try new things. There’s a school in Victoria that offers it which I’m checking out. I’ll have to sign up as well because she’ll need support. I’m not overly excited because I think it requires you to look down a lot. My neck isn’t going to be very happy.
Anyway, I don’t think we have much planned for this evening. Tomorrow my aunt and uncle will be visiting for Christmas Day. I did have Santa call Ella from his sleigh. 🛷 She said it was a “weird call” but I think it got her more excited. (It’s all prerecorded and they filled in her name and where she lives.) It did sound a bit robotic but it did the job. lol. I’m currently having a cookie and listening to Mary’s Boy Child by Boney M. For the first time ever, I have my presents wrapped before midnight. Yay, me! 🎉 🥳
