#loving him

Hi love, thank you for at least keeping things respectful in your anon — I’ll respond in the same way. You really couldn’t be further from the truth about me, and I’m only going to speak for myself and my own fandom, because I don’t know what others think. I’d actually like you to point out which anon of mine says that Louis is useless or not worth it. You’re twisting a lot of ideas and comments to make it seem like I’m constantly throwing meaningless hate at Louis, which I HAVE NOT DONE. Another thing worth mentioning is that sometimes words, whether I’m saying them or reading them, can get complicated in meaning. Maybe you know this, maybe you don’t, but my first language isn’t English, it’s Spanish. I’m from Mexico, and believe it or not, sometimes it’s easy to use expressions in Spanish that can sound like a direct insult toward Louis when they aren’t. I could give you several examples, but it would be hard to explain because it’s more Mexican slang than anything else.

NEVER in the 13 years I’ve been following Louis have I doubted his talent. I’ve never seen him as inferior to anyone else, I’ve never doubted him. In fact, I’ve said many times that I’ve always thought he has one of the most beautiful and powerful voices in the world, and I’ve emphasized that over and over again. I don’t spend that much time on Tumblr; honestly, I mostly come here to answer anons or reblog a few things. But my Twitter is FULL of my devotion to Louis, and anyone who follows me there can confirm that.

Louis is a great artist and has a great voice, but Louis is not being professional at this point in his career. Looking back at his first tour, seeing how hard he worked and how it paid off, made me incredibly proud because I knew he would make it. I’ve always trusted him and his talent. But at some point over the last few years, he settled into a very comfortable place, where he realized his fanbase would carry him no matter whether he did a good job or not. And that’s a double-edged sword. He could use his fanbase in a positive way, on bad days, when he feels like he’s not good enough, knowing he has fans who support and enjoy him. Or he could get comfortable and think, “Why try harder? Why take care of my voice? Why learn my own lyrics? They’re going to love me anyway.” And that’s when it becomes a bad decision.

I have NEVER denied that Harry has had certain things easier, we know that since One Direction, Harry was always positioned as the focus, as ‘the best.’ But I also have to say it’s shitty to minimize the things Harry has gone through just because they’re considered ‘less’ than Louis’s hardships. THIS IS NOT A COMPETITION OF PAIN OR STRUGGLES. No one is competing here, least of all the two of them. One thing I deeply admire about Harry is the professionalism with which he handles his career, how he captivates on stage, how seriously he takes his job and how well he does it. That said, I’m also aware that my connection to Harry has always been different from the one I have with Louis.

One thing I love about Louis is how genuine he’s always been with fans, how much closer he feels, how warmer and less ‘worked’ he comes across. I still think that. I still love him, I’m still in love with him and with who he is.

But we’re talking about professionalism here. We’re talking about the lack of effort he’s been showing in recent years. And this isn’t because of Liam or anything recent, this has been going on since Faith in the Future.

Louis has faced horrible things, absolutely, and it’s awful that he’s gone through them. His situation in One Direction wasn’t good either: the dismissal, the self-deprecation, all of that has always worked against him. But you know when I realized he could get past it? When he started his solo career. His first tour was IMPRESSIVE. MAGNIFICENT. Everything about that first tour was incredible, and it was an experience that saved my life. His voice was wonderful, his commitment to the show was perfect. And that was something we already knew, his fans already knew how good he was. He didn’t need to impress us. We already knew. He was the one who needed to believe it, and on that first tour, he did.

Hearing him be so vulnerable about his artistic process on AOTV was incredible, and I admire him deeply for that. But you can’t tell me it makes sense that instead of continuing to grow, his live performances have gone downhill. (THIS ENTIRE TIME, the only thing I’ve discussed and criticized about Louis has been his live shows. Only that. I have NEVER said he lacks talent or that his music is no longer good, on the contrary, FITF is one of the best albums in the world. My issue has always been live performances.)

It’s very, very easy to interpret any criticism of Louis as a personal attack, and I know this because sometimes I struggle with it too, because I love him and I think about everything he’s been through and I want to protect him. BUT when I reflect on it, when I understand that loving your favorite artist also means wanting them to grow and wanting the entire world to love them as much as you do (because they deserve it), it becomes easier to see where they can improve, what they can change. And also to acknowledge bad habits and lack of discipline, like drinking and smoking (before, during, and after shows), neglecting vocal care and vocal exercises, and not properly learning the songs he himself wrote and performs night after night.

Life isn’t fair, and it’s also not fair to put all the weight on Harry as if he were responsible for every privilege he’s had as an artist.

I admire Louis even more for trying after everything he’s been through. I admire him because he’s still here. And I just want him to fall back in love with being on stage and to give the best of himself, the version of him that filled me with euphoria at my first concert and made me want that night to last forever. And I know he can do it.