lovesickness [상사병] (explicit) | EPILOGUE + CONCEPT ART
title: lovesickness - the epilogue + concept arts pairing: jimin x f. reader rating/genre: m (18+) ; idol!verse with canon divergence, obsession au notes: No one asked for this, but this is a very short epilogue I started writing after I kept getting curious asks about what happens to BTS after the wish is undone. Because the central character is you, Y/N, the reader, their POV in the horror/mystery of it all wasn't relevant to add towards the end. Though, I wrote this short bit now that happens right when it ends..so if you want to accept this as canon to the AU, go for it. There's still a lot of this that is open to interpretation depending on what you think Y/N, Jimin and Namjoon do post-namjoon's wish/reversal… but here's some extra crumbs for thought. Before we get into that... I am also a bit of an ARTMY, I draw a lot on the side and tend to draw concept art for my fics to get a better idea visually of what I want to do with the fic and to also motivate me to write it haha. I'm a very visual person so I hope you guys like my shitty sketches. (i had some nsfw ones but those may be a little too much so) warnings for epilogue:: Psychological torment, Self-pleasure, open-ending total word count: 2.5k if you'd like to read the whole story, please check the rest of this fic out on AO3 here
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This is from one of the final scenes in part 3. the more i look at it now, the more i realized this looks like part of a visual novel lmao. backround screenshots ripped from jungkook's LV vlogs which helped me understand the backstage of it all.
this sketch comes from this passage in part 3 i was trying to visualize:
No one in the audience would ever notice you from here.The view is entirely different than it had been from your seat only days ago.From the audience, the stage had felt impossibly massive. Every movement looked larger than life beneath the LED screens and dazzling lights, every member existing somewhere between reality and fantasy for their fans. Back then, they almost didn't feel real at all. They were performers. Idols. Untouchable figures elevated by a distance.
But standing here, just offstage, strips away that illusion.
You can hear the rubber soles of their shoes against the stage floor between songs. You notice the subtle nods they exchange with one another after a successful transition, the quick adjustments to in-ear monitors, spoken words with the production team to adjust their mics a bit, the quiet conversations they squeeze in before the next cue. Even beneath the spectacle, they're simply seven people doing their jobs.
In that moment, your gaze settles on Jimin.
Without thinking, you lift your arm in front of you and pinch your fingers together toward the stage, mimicking the playful gesture fans always make from the audience to pretend they're holding an idol between their fingertips.
He looks so small.Tiny enough to fit between your fingers.Like a doll.Like a Sim waiting for someone else to decide where he goes next.The realization makes your hand falter.
and yes, that image in the background was also taken from my idol barricade seat in Vegas so it was perfect distance for this background shot i was visualizing.
These were just sketches of namjoon I drew from part 3? (from the talk Y/N had with Namjoon while Jimin was unconscious). The Jimin sketch is from part 2 where he was begging Y/N to not go back to her hotel and to stay with him.
this is not from any scene in particular, but just a concept art after trying to craft a bit of a bts x obsession au mood board on pinterest, which I just couldn't get a feel for, so I took matters into my own hands and drew one of the ref images I had.
that's it. now... onto the epilogue:
Dizzy. Nausea. A slight headache. There’s no other way to explain whatever this feeling is that Jimin is suddenly experiencing, crawling from the pit of his stomach all the way to the back of his head.
As he enters the dressing room after soundcheck, he almost collapses to the ground.
His fellow members are caught off guard by the sudden action, immediately asking if he’s alright and whether he’s feeling unwell. Staff rush to his side as well, carefully lifting him up and supporting him while they guide him over to the couch so he can lie down and rest for a bit.
Jimin doesn’t know what’s wrong.
Maybe he’s been drinking a little too much during the tour and the hangovers are lingering, or maybe all the jetlag has caught on to him. All this fatigue. Were things this bad when they would all tour before? Maybe it’s age that has affected his health this time around, he thinks.
The overhead lights bother him, so he raises his hoodie-covered hands to shield his face. With the sudden darkness making it easier to relax, exhaustion quickly takes over…
Into REM sleep. Into a dream of some kind. Into somewhere that feels... uncanny.
He’s in his hotel room, sitting beside a woman smiling at him so lovingly, but something feels off. He doesn’t know who she is, yet somehow it seems like they’re in a relationship. Everything is blurry, making it impossible to make out her facial features. He’s met countless people throughout his career, but he knows he’s never seen this woman before.
Still... there’s something comforting about her.
She gently rests her head against his shoulder. Warm sunset light filters through the windows, casting the room in soft orange hues as the sun disappears behind the desert mountains. It should feel peaceful.
Instead, it feels unfamiliar.
Unnerving.
The dream shifts.
Now he’s in a bed. Tangled sheets. The lingering remnants of sex and desires he didn’t know he had. Then he turns around and see blood splattered at the venue backstage corridors, his fellow members hurts, and him being connected to an iv and the his members looking at him like he's some kind of monster.
Did he do that? No, no he didn’t. But who did? A sasaeng? A crazed terrorist of some kind? Someone else? He can’t comprehend this. What happened? This whole dream isn’t making any sense. What…
Who?
Wait, where is that woman?
Wait, what woman?
The woman that–
"지민아." ["Jimin."]
Jimin immediately wakes up with a gasp for air, sweat dripping from his face. He looks and the faces closest to him are suddenly clear. It’s Namjoon and Yoongi.
"You okay…? 너무 뒤척여서 깨우는 게 나을 것 같았어." ["You were moving around so much in your sleep that we thought it was best to wake you up."] Namjoon says, concern written all over his face. He cares a lot for this younger one. Jimin’s always carrying everyone’s burdens with a smile while quietly keeping his own to himself. Sometimes Namjoon wonders... if everyone goes to Jimin with their problems, then who does Jimin go to? Whatever Jimin is feeling, he wants to be there for him too. "아... 으…" ["Oh... ugh…"] He feels the back of his head pulsating again. Why does it feel like he got hit really hard. Nothing of this sort has happened. "괜찮아요." ["I'm okay."] He rubs the back of his head. "갑자기 좀 이상한 기분이 들었어요... 그리고 되게 이상한 꿈도 꿨어요..." ["I just suddenly started feeling really odd... and I had a really weird dream..."]
"괜찮다고만 하고 또 숨기는 거 아니야?" ["You sure you're not just saying you're okay and covering up something else?"] Yoongi asks, crossing his arms as he looks down at the younger man still lying on the couch.
"아니에요, 진짜 괜찮아요. 그냥 조금만 쉬면 될 것 같아요." ["No, really, I'm fine. I think I just need to take it easy for a bit."]
From across the room, Jungkook chimes into the conversation, "우리 이제 투어 전반부도 거의 끝났잖아! 공연 네 번만 더 하면 집에 간다! 조금만 버텨, 쟈민!" ["We're almost done with this first part of the tour! Just four more shows and we're back home again. Hang in there, Jyamin!"]
Yeah, that is a relief to think about. Jimin is glad the company spaced these legs out much better for the guys to come home and rest and then go back at it again. He just needs to get through these Vegas shows, and for some reason, it suddenly has him on edge.
He still vaguely remembers his dreams, but again, has no idea why his mind conjured that up.
"자, 일어나." ["Come on, let's get you up."] Namjoon holds out his hand. "스태프한테 진통제랑 전해질 음료 좀 가져다 달라고 할게. 그거 마시면 좀 괜찮아질 거야." ["I'll have the staff grab you some pain relievers and electrolytes. Hopefully that'll help you recover a bit."] Namjoon stretches his hand out to Jimin, and for some reason when both of their hands touch, Namjoon suddenly gets a vision.
Visuals of jimin's acting erratic and needy, almost to the point of him fixating on something. And Jimin going through some kind of manic episode and self-harming suddenly in the middle of a restaurant. Jimin making out a beautiful woman in the elevator and smirking at him as he watches–
Oh…
Jimin makes a face at Namjoon once he notices he’s clearly zoned out for some reason. Now it’s his turn to ask about what’s with the sudden change in behavior.
"너 왜 갑자기 멍 때려?" ["What's with you spacing out now?"]
"어?" ["Huh?"] Namjoon blinks. "아... 아무것도 아니야. 그냥... 좀 이상한 걸 봤어." ["Oh... nothing. I just... saw something weird."] Namjoons shakes his head and then continues to pull him up until he is fully sitting now, but Jimin still gives him a weird look. "아무튼..." ["Anyways..."] Namjoon says, trying to brush it off and get back to the matter at hand. "진짜 괜찮겠어?" ["Will you really be okay?"]
Namjoon’s now worried that whatever he just saw is a premonition of something that will happen in the future. But looking at Jimin now, it seems very unlikely, though he never knows. "힘들면 꼭 말해야 한다? 알겠지?" ["You'll tell me if things get hard, right? Right?"]
Jimin giggles, genuinely warmed by how worried Namjoon sounds. "당연하죠, 형!" ["Of course, hyung!"] "우리 다 이번 투어에서는 무리하지 말고 솔직하게 말하기로 약속했잖아요. 아미들 걱정시키면 안 되니까." ["We all promised we'd be honest and not push ourselves too hard during this tour. We gotta stay healthy so we don't worry ARMY."]
"그래." ["Alright."] Namjoon gives him a small smile. "믿을게." ["I'll trust you."]
The concert unfolds the way every past BTS ARIRANG show does. The crowd chants and sings until their voices crack. The sharp and hypnotic choreography pulls everyone under. Emotions run high and free. No one holds back at BTS shows, and that’s how it was today. When the lights shift for the final stretch of Into the Sun, everything grows brighter, clearer. Faces in the audience become visible in a way they haven’t been all night.
The members love this part of the show. They linger a little longer than usual, waving and smiling as they soak it in before slowly making their way off the stage toward the backstage exit and, eventually, the hotel.
Jimin stops near the edge of the stage, standing still as he stares into the crowd. A woman. Something about her face and presence tugs at the edges of a dream he can’t fully remember, and he tells himself that can’t be right even as he keeps looking. Namjoon notices the pause and slows as well, watching him carefully.
From your spot in the sea of lightsticks you feel the weight of that stare and immediately think it can’t be on you, not with thousands of people around and many of them much closer. Still, your hand rises without thinking and you point at yourself. You wear a hair clip on the right side of your head which has Jimin’s face on it. He can’t make out the image from that distance, but the small shine catches the light, and he lifts his own hand to touch the same spot on his head in a quiet mirror of the gesture.
Immediate fear hits you the moment you are certain his eyes are on you. You can’t hold the contact, not after the flash of visions that struck you after soundcheck. You still don’t understand what those images were, but they leave you cold and scared, so you drop your gaze and hide behind your Army bomb while your heart slams against your ribs.
Your friends grab your shoulders and shake you, their voices tumbling over each other.
"Oh my god, he finally looked at you!"
"See this would’ve happened earlier if you lifted the poster again, why didn’t you–"
No…
Their words blur into background noise. You feel irrational and strange, as if you are mixing real life with whatever delirium fatigue and too much fanfiction you cooked up in your head, and internally, you beg him to just leave. Please. This is a bit too much for you right now to be perceived.
Suddenly, Namjoon appears behind Jimin and guides him forward with a hand on his back, reminding him they need to go. Jimin doesn’t fully understand why he stopped in the first place. Someone looked oddly familiar, that’s all. He lets it go, slips an arm around Namjoon’s shoulders, and the two of them disappear down the catwalk with the other members that leads them out as Day 1 comes to an end.
Back at the hotel Namjoon can’t shake the earlier vision. One clear piece keeps looping through his mind is a moment with you where you are apologizing about something, voice all soft and unsettled, while all he can do is stare at the way you look and the quiet duality about you that pulls at him. Then the elevator moment appears in his mind again, Jimin pressing closer and getting intimate with you while Namjoon stays frozen, unable to speak, heat crawling under his skin.
In his room he locks the door, sits on the edge of the bed, and lets his hand drift lower. He closes his eyes and touches himself slowly at first, then with more urgency, thinking of your face, the way you might look under him, and the way Jimin looked at you in that moment. Soft moans slip out before he can stop them and his breathing turns uneven.
A knock cuts through the haze.
"형? 진이랑 정국이 스위트에서 저녁 먹으러 나올 거야?" [“Hyung? You coming out to eat dinner at Jin and Jungkook’s suite."] Jimin’s voice comes to light and waits on the other side of the door.
Namjoon freezes, jaw tight with frustration. He forces his breathing steady, wipes his hand on the sheets, and calls back that he is reading and will be out in a bit. He stays there a moment longer, pulse still high, wanting answers. How do you even begin to explain a vision that feels like something out of an old TV show when no one would believe it?
Everything is all well though, so why does this whole thing even matter to him? He tells himself he’ll go eat up and come back to get rest, maybe he genuinely needs that too.
Day 2 goes smoothly. You enjoy every second without asking for more than the ticket has given you, and near the end, right before Please finishes, you slip out early to beat traffic. At the hotel you pack quickly. You have already sold your Day 3 and Day 4 tickets and switched your flight to an earlier departure, the lingering weight of those visions making the decision feel necessary. Better to leave before the delusion grows teeth.
You wait outside in the space between the Waldorf Astoria and the Aria with your luggage at your feet and your bag on your lap. An Uber with its glowing sign pulls up. You load the suitcase into the trunk and climb into the back seat.
A short distance away, Jimin and Namjoon have just stepped out of the van after the concert, still in their stage clothes under light jackets, trailed by their managers and a bodyguard. The night air feels cooler than expected after the heat of the venue, and both of them move with that familiar post-show mix of exhaustion and restless energy. They are heading out for dessert, nothing elaborate, just something sweet before calling it a night.
Jimin scrolls through his phone one last time as they walk. "야, 여기 구글 리뷰 진짜 좋더라. 아이스크림이 엄청 크리미하다던데. 점수 거의 만점에 가깝고." [Hey, the Google reviews for this place are really good. People say the ice cream is super creamy. Almost perfect scores.]
Namjoon glances over with a small smile, hands in his pockets. "리뷰만 믿고 가는 거 맞아? 우리 지금 이 시간에?" [We’re really going just based on reviews? At this hour?]
"모험이니까." Jimin shrugs, grinning. "어차피 배고프고. 네가 모험 좋아하잖아." [It’s an adventure. We’re hungry anyway. And you like adventures.]
Namjoon lets out a quiet laugh. "그래, 그래. 네가 그렇게 추천하니까 한번 가보자. 매니저 형들도 괜찮대." [Fine, fine. Since you’re recommending it so much, let’s try it. The managers said it’s okay too.]
Their conversation stays light as they continue down the sidewalk, the managers chatting a few steps behind while the bodyguard keeps a watchful distance. Lights reflect off the nearby hotels, and the usual late-night Vegas traffic hums in the background.
Up ahead they notice a car with a glowing Uber sign pulling up to the curb of the hotel. A woman stands beside it with luggage, loading a suitcase into the trunk before climbing into the back seat. None of them think much of it at first. Just another person heading to the airport most likely and trying to get out of Vegas.
The door closes. The car starts to idle for a second. Then the angle shifts as it begins to ease forward, and the woman’s face becomes clear through the side window under the streetlight.
Both Jimin and Namjoon stop walking at almost the same time.
Their eyes widen.
It’s her. The woman from the visions! Real, and definitely existing. Standing, no, sitting, right there in that ordinary black car, close enough that if either of them took a few quick steps they could reach the door.
One of them shifts forward almost instinctively, the impulse sharp and sudden, but the vehicle is already rolling. The driver merges carefully into the light traffic. You turn toward the window at the same moment, as if something pulled your attention, and your eyes meet theirs for a few seconds. Something sharp tugs hard at your chest, an unexplainable recognition that leaves you frozen in the back seat. Jimin and Namjoon wave gently at you, and you wave back, a slight smile forming on your face, feeling now relaxed. It’s like you’re relieved to see them for some reason, even though you were in fear the day before.
You guess this may be a good note to leave off on with them...
Then the car pulls away completely, taillights disappearing down the road amongst many cars, and you are gone from their sights. end.
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author's notes: thank you all for giving so much love to this silly AU. i love to hear what you think of the story, concept art, the epilogue, etc.! this will be the last time i will work on this AU (possible detail adds in the future if i'm up for it), so this is farewell to lovesickness!jimin, lovesickness!namjoon and our lovesickness! reader! forgot to mention: check out the lovesickness spotify playlist here! : https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0lJGhjyHF40N54sRHZTuAu?si=ad2b3704117a4b4d
