Warnings: everyone's just tired, idk what else to say, lmk if there's any other warnings i missed
Rhysand didn't like this plan. He felt too exposed walking with Lucien through the Spring Court. Behind them, Azriel, Nesta, and Cassian were glamoured and walking silently. Until Cassian sniffled loudly. Nesta hushed him, reaching into her small satchel and passing him the elixir for his allergies. He downed the potion, immediately feeling relief from the pollen. Nesta bit back her laughter at her mate. He’s one of the most powerful warriors in history, yet he's powerless to pollen.Â
“Are you sure this will work?” Rhys asked.Â
“I don't know. He’s… unwell,” Lucien frowned. The male still felt immense guilt over everything that happened during the war. He didn’t mean to leave his friend, but Lucien realized that he needed to think about himself as well. Especially with Elain and his true father. That was something he’s still processing, but he was grateful for the warm welcome. He only wished that his mother had left the Autumn Court as well. He prayed to The Mother that Eris would protect her.
Azriel felt a tug within him. The closer they got to the pond of starlight, the quicker he could see you again. He had been waiting for this moment for months now. He wasn't going to let a grown male who was having a temper tantrum get in his way.Â
“You dare cross into my territory with your band of warriors, Lucien?” The beast snarled. Fuck. Azriel was too distracted to notice Tamlin creeping in the woods. “Drop the glamour.”
“Tamlin, we’re only here to pass through,” Lucien stated calmly to avoid raising his temper. He wasn't certain he could reach his oldest friend. Guilt crept through him at how Tamlin must've seen him now. A traitor. He should've said no to Rhys; he should be in the Day Court with Elain. She was about to have their first infant, and he knew Helion would be hovering more.Â
Rhys dropped the glamour on his family only to have the beast growl. “Explain why your spymaster smells different,” he snarled.Â
“My mate was taken to another world, and we are trying to get her back,” Azriel said honestly. There was no point in fighting with the beast. Perhaps he wouldn't be so cruel and let them pass. Azriel prayed as he explained the situation. He didn't care about the rivalries and issues between the courts. He only wanted to see you and bring you home. He was exhausted from repeating himself and on the brink of losing his patience.Â
“Whatever issues you have with me, let them be with me, Tamlin. Azriel only had two weeks with his mate before she was taken. It’s been two months and six days since he last saw her,” Rhys said truthfully. He didn’t care anymore; the exhaustion of researching and making sure his brother was alright began to weigh on him each day that you were gone. He had his own agenda for having you back, but seeing his brother in pain trumped it all. He wanted to see Azriel happy again more than anything.
Tamlin looked at the shadowsinger, assessing the story of his apparent mate. Mate, he thought, what did the warrior do to deserve one? The question should have been what went wrong for the warrior to find his mate. His eyes narrowed on Azriel, taking note of the bruising under his eyes and the hallowness of his cheeks. He never noticed the timeless beauty of the warrior. No, it wasn’t time to think about that.
“Where will this take place?” The beast snarled.
“The pond of starlight,” Nesta answered. Tamlin glared at the Archeron sister, and Cassian braced for an attack. She explained calmly the research they found, and was also exhausted from the countless explanations.Â
“I am aware of the old tales of the pond. Seven warriors entered through it three hundred years ago,” He said. Cassian’s eyes widened before he turned to look at Azriel. “What?” Tamlin snarled.
“Those are her fathers,” Rhysand sighed. Lucien’s golden eye whirred at the information. He and Tamlin knew your fathers, and they were good males. Why would they take you without reason? Tamlin had thought the same and knew what his decision would be. Only for the fact that his message would ultimately ruin every important relationship he had. It’s what he deserved for being so cruel to Feyre.Â
“Tell Gavriel, I’m sorry for failing. You may pass,” The beast walked away without saying anything else. Rhys turned to Lucien, a silent request for more information, but he shook his head. His mind was already swirling with guilt, and his oldest friend delivered the final blow. They failed the lion, and he wasn’t sure how to recover from that. No, he couldn’t think like that. He’d be a part of his child’s life and support his family in whatever way he can. He hadn’t failed yet.
“Let’s go,” Azriel breathed out. They continued walking through the woods, no longer threatened by the beast or cruel creatures that escaped during Amarantha’s curse. Rhysand found himself picturing his mate here, talking with the Suriel. He was still in shock at how she was able to catch the creature twice.Â
“So… your mate,” Lucien said carefully. Azriel looked at the fox, waiting for whatever question was about to come out of his mouth. There was no bad blood between the males, perhaps some bruised egos. The shadowsinger didn’t care about that part of his past, and neither did the fox. “She’s from the Court of Nightmares, and it didn’t bother you?”
“No,” Azriel said calmly.Â
“She is not like most in the Hewn City,” Rhys added.Â
“Nesta likes her, I’m not sure if that’s a good or bad thing,” Cassian smirked. Lucien chuckled at that as Nesta rolled her eyes.
“Gods spare us all if she joins the Valkyrie,” He smirked.Â
“It wouldn’t be a bad move, I’m sure she’d enjoy The Blood Rite,” Azriel smirked. He had spoken much about his experience in The Blood Rite, and your eyes lit up at the thought of participating. You didn’t shy away from the thought of being cruel, and he found that incredibly arousing.Â
“We’re here,” Nesta said, kneeling to survey the pond of starlight. The shimmering water hummed to her, as if all the answers of this world would be found in it. She prayed that Amren and Mor were right about this and not making a fool out of Azriel’s pain. Not that they would, but you never know some fae’s intentions.
“Here,” Cassian said, passing the bag of black salt to his mate. She steadily poured the salt into the water. Azriel kneeled next to her, one of his shadows placed your shirt in the pond next, and your scent quickly took over the pond. Cassian’s wings bristled, his knowledge of the world beginning to change again. He should keep a journal at this rate, he thought, and held back his smile.Â
“I think we’re ready,” Nesta said. Azriel nodded and sent one of his shadows into the pool. Whispers began to cloud his head as he commanded his shadow to find you. When the shadow returned, its essence was delightful, eager to pull its master into the pond.
She’s here! She’s here! She’s in a land of shapeshifters, a better world, a better world!
Azriel nodded and joined hands with Nesta. She took Cassian’s, and he grabbed Rhys’s. “No attacks, we’re only going to bring her home,” Azriel reminded them. They agreed before taking a step into the pond, their intentions clear as the channel guided them below the water. Azriel let his eyes close, opening his mental shields to find you, tugging as much as he could on the bond, nothing but the thought of you on his mind before he lost consciousness. I’m coming, my love. We’re going to have more time.
“Keep still, I need to do a proper assessment,” Yrene scolded. Each time her hands came in contact with your bare skin, you squirmed like a little worm. It was odd enough to keep your shield down and preserve your energy. Having someone who wasn’t your mate make such similar contact was unnerving. In an effort not to be rude, you avoided bringing up how cold Yrene’s hands are.Â
Chaol heard the commotion behind him, being forced to sit in his chair and face the wall for your modesty. He was always willing to be close to aid his wife, even more so after his fuck up and unfair treatment toward you. As the weeks passed, he realized you were quite harmless outside of training with The Bane and Cadre. Your relationship with your fathers also improved.Â
Rowan had become entirely affectionate with you, holding you when he noticed you’d get sad, pressing gentle kisses to your hair, and even helping you shift and learn more about Terrasen. Fenrys and Lorcan were their usual splendid self with you, but it seemed to grow stronger each day. Chaol wondered how you were able to forgive so easily, and how he could ask you without the threatening looks everyone gave him.Â
“It’s different,” You muttered, finally sitting still enough for Yrene to feel the jagged scars. “One other fae has touched me like this.” Yrene frowned at the tone your voice had taken. As more time passed without an answer, the more your heart was breaking. She did not know what would happen to mates if they were separated for a long time, but she worried that the result would ruin you.Â
“We’re doing everything we can to get you home,” She assured you. You nodded, knowing it was a matter of time before you had an answer. Rowan tried to ease your mind whenever you asked, but his guilt ate him alive with uncertainty.Â
“You have a lot of power running through the scars. What did they whip you with?” Yrene asked.
“I didn’t care to ask. I was plotting my revenge,” You muttered.
“Did you get it?” Chaol asked, and your eyes narrowed at the back of his head. You contemplated telling him the truth, but you were still angry with him for thinking the worst without giving you a chance. He saw people as a whole, but never thought beyond it. Everyone was complex. That much was true about his friends. Regardless, you decided that terrifying him was better than being truthful.
“The list continues to grow and varies,” You said flatly and noticed how he shuddered. Good.Â
“I’ll be able to heal you, it will take time, and it will be incredibly painful,” Yrene said. You bit the inside of your cheek, questioning your life choices. You wanted your back tattooed more than anything right now, but would it be worth it?Â
“Can I take a day to think about it?” You asked.
“Of course, we’ll leave you to rest. Your training this morning looked brutal,” Chaol said, and you threw a soft pillow at his head.Â
“You can substitute for me next time, and get your ass beat by centuries-old male warriors,” You retorted, and he laughed. It was true, though, your training went horribly today. For some odd reason, you couldn’t focus even with every defense you had down. You didn’t believe the tug you felt on the mating bond, but it was there. Rowan saw how distracted you were and ended the training early. He attempted to give you space, but he couldn’t stop worrying about you. Once Yerene and Chaol left your room, he entered.Â
“How are you feeling?” He asked.
“Like I got my ass handed to me,” you grunted. Rowan smirked, pulling a chair to your bedside. You turned on your side to stare up at him, and you found yourself fully appreciating his beauty. All your fathers were handsome, but their personalities were nearly identical to other males you’ve encountered. The biggest difference is their ability to change. You had only peeked into Rowan’s mind when he allowed you to. He resisted for weeks, not wanting the horrors he’s faced to sway your judgment of him. It didn’t, and he realized his daughter couldn’t be manipulated like he once was. Your anger surpassed any other emotion, but you never acted on it like most. It reminded him of his mate and her never-ending well of power.
“Did you want to talk?” You asked.
“Yes, you were distracted today. I want to know why,” He said softly. Your eyes landed on the soft linens on your bed. Aelin had the room converted to your preferences, and without realizing it, you had asked her to make it like your room back in Velaris. Rowan said your name gently, bringing you out of your thoughts.
“You’ll think I’m mad, but for a moment… I thought I felt a tug on the mating bond. It wasn’t like when the rift opened, it felt closer,” You explained. “I don’t want to get my hopes up, but perhaps Az found a way.”
“And you don’t want to leave yet,” Rowan added. You nodded once, keeping the covers tucked under your chin. Selfishly, Rowan was glad to hear that you didn’t want to leave. He knew you’d be an amazing diplomat. He wanted to show you everything in this world and grow a closer bond with you. It didn’t matter what he preferred; this conflict within you was going to put you in harm's way.
“Where I come from, females don’t have many choices,” You said. “If I didn’t have time to know everyone here, the choice wouldn’t be so difficult. I… I don’t know what to do, Dad.”
“Don’t forget that we don’t know how we’ll be receiving your mate,” He sighed.Â
“I trained him, don’t worry. He’s learning to think instead of immediately going to war,” You smirked, but Rowan didn’t smile. “I told him I’m safe, that should ease the anger.”
“Do you want to go back home? Inching your way toward what’s already here for you?” Rowan asked. It wasn’t malicious; it was the truth. You’d struggled endlessly with the thought of going home. It didn’t take long to figure out that any attempts to find you weren’t for your safety or concern, but for Azriel’s sanity. He had to have been losing his mind, and you did want to go back to him more than anything, but you didn’t want to go through the interrogation of what you went through in Terrasen. Your instinct to protect these peaceful people was… inexplicable, but greater than your instinct to protect the Night Court.Â
“I don’t want to go back to what I saw and experienced, but my mate has a duty to protect his people, and I won’t pull him away from the only family he has,” You said softly.Â
“You are also his people as much as you are ours. Your stepmother is already planning your coronation,” He smirked. You immediately cringed, slapping his leg in reprimand.Â
“Don’t ever refer to Aelin as my stepmother again. It’s odder than your age difference,” You scolded, only to be received with infectious laughter. “I’m trying to have a serious conversation with you as my dad. You need practice for all the siblings I’m going to have.” Rowan’s laughter grew. He knew you were right, but he needed to see you smile again.Â
“If what you’re feeling is true, then we will help you through whatever choice you make.” You nodded, feeling the exhaustion beginning to take over. “How about tomorrow, you train with Lyssandra? Your shifting still needs a bit of improvement.”
“How about in two days? I want Yrene to heal my back,” You sighed. “That is a choice I’m ready to make. I can feel how it’s stopping my power.”Â
“I thought you’d say that. She’s already on her way back with Chaol. If it becomes too unbearable, try to distract yourself by demolishing his confidence,” He winked. You giggled before sitting up and focusing on your breathing. Yrene and Chaol surveyed the pair, content in watching them be in a better place than when they first arrived in Terrasen.Â
“Are you ready?” Yrene asked. You nodded, and Chaol walked to his designated corner. He hated how he could imagine you saying “good doggy” to him.Â
“Keep your shields up, and I won't be able to do that,” You smiled.Â
“I know you're only messing with me because you're nervous,” Chaol said and quickly built up his mental shields again. Yrene rolled her eyes at your taunting, but she allowed it for the sake of your comfort.Â
“You should make a wind barrier, I don't want to alarm anyone,” you told Rowan, and he complied. Chaol shuddered as the barrier breezed past him. You turned to lie on your stomach, slipping your shirt off in the process. You reached for your dad’s hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. “I’m not leaving your side,” He promised. You nodded and let Yrene begin the healing process.
The warm light washed over you like the morning sun hitting your skin during your trips to Perranth. You focused on that feeling as much as you could before Yrene began to mend the first scar at the top of your back. Rowan hissed as his knuckles began to pop from the amount of force you squeezed his hand with.Â
“You’re doing great,” Rowan said before feeling his mate running down the hall.Â
Aelin watched beyond the wind barrier, wanting to be closer to ensure you were alright. She waited patiently outside, wincing when you did.Â
Once Yrene was halfway down your back, the pain became unbearable. Your body tensed, every instinct to protect yourself was coming back tenfold. Sweat broke out on Yrene’s brow at the largest scar. She felt the stagnant power whispering to her.Â
Heal, heal, heal, reveal the gift within.Â
“You must relax,” Yrene reminded you. Rowan tried to soothe you, but it fell on deaf ears. He wasn't sure how to ease you, but over the past few weeks, he noticed something about you that Lorcan and Fenrys hadn't.Â
“Scream,” he said. “You have so much anger within you, let it go. Be as loud as you need to be.”Â
“Think of everything that's angered you, let it out!” Chaol said, and your eyes snapped immediately to the back of his head. You thought of every male who thought nothing of you, of Chaol and his shallowness. You thought of Rhysand, your annoyance with him. Then to your fathers and brothers stealing you. You thought of Gavriel, and how you'd never know him. Every lashing, punch, and attack that was used to punish you. You thought of the corruption in the Night Court, in all of Prythian, and that was your breaking point.Â
Beyond the castle, Aedion and Evangeline were riding their horses on their way back to Orynth from the mountains. “Will your sister stay with us?” Evangeline asked. Aedion frowned, unsure how to respond to his daughter. He didn't want to get her hopes up.Â
Before he could answer, your piercing scream reached their ears. Aedion’s stomach sank, and he looked to his daughter. She blinked and regained focus on her horse. Without hesitation, she took off, and her father was right behind her. In the sky, Abraxos and Manon dove for the castle, Sartaq and Nesryn soared over Evangeline on their Rhuks. Within the castle, Dorian sprinted toward your room with Lorcan and Fenrys. As they turned the corner, Aelin was covering her pointed ears with her eyes screwed shut. Fenrys immediately went to her side, shuddering at your screams.Â
“Gods above, what is happening?” Lorcan asked. Dorian watched through the doorway, wincing as he saw Rowan keep your shoulders pinned to the bed and Yrene straddling your waist. That was why everyone heard you. Rowan couldn't keep the shield of wind intact as your body pulsed with magic. Each scar that vanished into small white lines released a wave of stagnant magic. Your screams and magic combined broke Rowan’s barrier.Â
Release the gift, release the gift, chosen, chosen, the chosen will rise!Â
The voices shouted in unison. Manon and Yrene locked eyes, confirming they had heard them correctly. Rise, rise, RISE! The voices were female, young, and old, and Manon knew who was speaking. It didn’t make sense; the gods were gone.Â
Yrene finished the last scar, watching the magic pulse in waves against your body. The voices stopped chanting, sweat dripped off her brow, and then she turned to check on her husband. He was still turned around, but she noticed his ragged breathing. In an instant, she was by his side while Rowan checked on you.Â
“Are you all right?” Yrene asked Chaol. He nodded, shaking off his momentary shock. “What is it? Is it your spine?” Yrene had never seen Chaol so… she wasn’t sure what to call the face he was making. Hopeful, disbelief? Had he heard the voices, too?
“I think… I think she fully healed me,” He said softly. His arms were braced on his chair, not feeling the usual strain that came after a healing session his wife did. His shields were up, yet you still managed to find his mind. You only stood there, radiating that familiar warmth that came with healing magic. When the screaming began, he saw the tears slip down your face in his mind. Those small drops of magic pulsed through him and centered on where his injury was. Chaol didn’t understand it, but he felt it all the same. Gone were the constant aches; his legs didn’t feel as weak either.Â
“I did,” You said softly from behind Chaol. Manon offered you a shirt to slip on, surprised to see you sitting up already. She felt the magic pulsing off your body, impressed with how your body began to adjust so quickly. “At first, I didn’t know why I was in your mind, but I figured it was best to heal you when I felt Yrene’s exhaustion,” You explained, wiping away your tears. Lorcan immediately rushed to your side, brushing back your sweaty strands of hair.Â
“Are you… How do you feel?” Sartaq asked.Â
“Your skin and hair look radiant,” Aelin said, and you chuckled.Â
“I can’t seem to find the wall where my magic ends,” You said and rolled your shoulders back, no longer feeling the tightness from the scars. You felt lighter in general, a soft grin spreading across your face.Â
“It seems like we’ve created someone more powerful than us,” Lorcan smirked. “I’d be offended if you weren’t mine.” You chuckled before leaning against him. In an effort of hope, you tugged on the mating bond and waited. The faintest tug was Azriel’s response. You’d see each other soon, and you prayed to The Mother that a war wouldn’t come along with it.Â
Note: they're getting closer, but whose anxiety is worse about it? Thank you for your patience, everyone. I've been actively grieving after losing someone close to me. Slowly but surely, I'm getting back into writing, so stay tuned.
Taglist: @sophieliz @tele86 @dracosdiaries @alexof90s @fuckingsimp4azriel @blackgirlmagicforever @bookworm-weirdofor-life