#longdistancefriends

Two months later, “Atlie 🐢” and “Ash 🌻” are still texting almost every day — updates about school, siblings, and snacks (lots of snacks). It’s different now, though. Distance has a way of making even the smallest messages feel heavy.

Atlas says San Myshuno is loud, bright, and full of people. Ashley says San Sequoia feels too quiet without him. Neither admits how much they miss the other, but it’s there — tucked between emojis and laughter, in every “wyd” and “goodnight.”

What it Means to Be a Friend to Me (March 2017)

When I came back from the cruise, all I was doing was trying to find my way back out onto another adventure. I can’t even count how many applications I sent out to employers all over the United States, but for a short-term goal for the summer, I wanted to go on a trip out of the country. By myself. 

I’d almost bought a plane ticket to Iceland because  I found a really good deal on plane tickets, but for some reason, every time I tried to go through with the transaction, the website wouldn’t let me. Plus Iceland was expensive, and was actually the ultimate fantasy destination for my dreams of travel, so maybe I should save it for last. There’s no place on earth that seems more magical to me. I’d probably get there, and then ask myself “Now what do I do?”

It had been a while since I chatted with my friend Gerwin. We met on Omegle back in July of 2012 when I was in California. I don’t think we even had any common interests, and he was one of the few people that I didn’t meet through videochat. Somehow, we ended up typing back and forth to each other for about 5 hours  and have become best friends ever since. 

At the time, he and I were in very similar situations. Neither of us had been in real relationships before, but there were people that we really liked who we both met online and who also lived very far away. At the time, my guy was in England, and his girl was in Indonesia. 

I thought I had it bad with just distance, but he had a longer distance to travel plus a religious barrier and a complete culture shock to deal with. For years, we’d comfort each other for our losses and congratulate each other on our gains. He was like my personal blog, who, if anyone ever read our conversations, would get to know every little thing about me because I never hid anything from him. It was easy to talk to him because he’d always be supportive and understanding, and never judgemental. 

I wanted to do something for Gerwin to show my appreciation for his friendship, so as something to help me with some graphic design practice, I illustrated a photo of him which inspired me to illustrate more photos of people and ask them what they thought was an important quality about being a true friend. I wanted to make a book called “The ABC’s of Friendship” which featured a different person for each letter. I couldn’t find the energy in myself to complete this project because at the time, a lot of people who volunteered weren’t even my friends. I could only complete a few of the illustrations, and then didn’t bother with the rest because my heart wasn’t in it. It wasn’t true friendship like what I had with Gerwin. 

Fast-forward about 5 years, and Gerwin has listened to me talk about everything and everyone almost every day consistently. I would never want to lose out on a friend like that. 

Recently, he’d been occupied with his new job and internship with Microsoft, and I was busy driving all the time, so we didn’t talk much anymore. Last time I talked to him, he was dealing with the stress and heartache of another girl he’d found on the internet. He was supposed to meet her around Christmas time, but plans fell through because she had gotten terribly ill and he was never to hear from her again. 

When I talked to him again on St. Paddy’s day, he said that he wasn’t having the greatest of days. He said he was feeling really depressed, lonely, heart-broken, and stressed from his job. He said he wasn’t feeling alive.

Maybe I wasn’t supposed to go to Iceland first, and that’s why I wasn’t able to buy tickets, but once I tried to buy a ticket to Amsterdam, I had no problems at all. Without even thinking at all, and not even 10 minutes after I had stopped talking to Gerwin, I purchased a plane ticket to go see him and meet him for the first time in real life so that I could show him a brighter side to life. 

I told him immediately after I had everything booked, and I forwarded my itinerary as proof that I was that crazy and that serious. I would go any distance to help a friend, and especially one who was so dear to me. In less than three weeks from now (March 31st) I’ll be there. 

This trip was actually the inspiration for me to write over 60 blog posts in 5 days going over the details of how I came to this moment. I wanted to write as much as possible about the people that have impacted me along the way and how far I have developed as a person because of them. Through the good and the bad, I have learned so much over the years, and met so many influential people. I am sure that meeting one of them is going to be an epic experience worth remembering, so I needed to catch up by writing as much as I could about other people who have influenced me. Now I’m all caught up, and it only took starvation and never leaving my room except to go to work. Now I can eat and get out of my bed for the first time all day at almost 6 PM.  

Sometimes, when we are super close to family or a friend, or even a boyfriend/girlfriend, we forget to rely on God for everything and we end up relying on that person. Due to that there are times God will separate us from that person so we end up having to rely on Him instead. It is scary and confusing. If this is happening to you and it seems scary, it is most likely your first time. Do not be scared! This is a good growing pain season. Just be sure to constantly look to God for everything.

By the end of the conversation we both felt extremely relieved and a huge weight lifted off our shoulders. We also both realized we used to be each others crutches and although we are no long each others crutch we do 100% still appreciate the friendship we have so we can talk about such things and help one another out.