#lockdown lads

Dan: Phil got angry today.

Phil: *gasp*

Dan: Phil, little AmazingPhil, he's so timid, he's so nice. No, he got MAD. He was effing and blinding and smacking objects today.

Phil: I was.

Dan: And do you want to know what it was that got Philip Michael Lester so tilted that he started enacting violence upon inanimate objects? He didn't know how to operate a printer. Whoop, whoop!

Phil: Look...

Dan: Explain yourself.

Phil: Has a printer every worked for anyone? Do they sell them as a joke so they break in 30 minutes after you've bought them.

Dan: It's not that upsetting though.

Phil: It was upsetting 'cause I spent about half an hour trying to do it while someone was waiting for me to do it on Zoom, and they needed something that I had printed and I didn't have it. So I was: Ah! I'm holding people up. "My printer's broke" is the worst excuse you can give.

Dan: So do you think that... punching the printer will help, Phil?

Phil: Yeah.

Dan: That's not how the universe works. You need to gently caress the printer and then go: Baby, I respect you. I'm here for you in your time of need.

Phil: I think at one point-

Dan: I accept you on this journey of growth and I'm ready to receive the slip from your slit whenever you're ready to dispense it.

Phil: "The slip from your slit"? I mean, I think I said I'm going to effing throw you through the window

Dan: *delighted laugh*

Phil: And then, do you know-

Dan: I was like, I was in another room and I was like, has Phil hurt himself? Are we being burgled? Like this is so UNUSUAL. What is happening? Oh my god, Phil.

Phil: Yeah, do you know that little flap that comes out, which holds the paper? I was tempted to just bite it. I was like then I'll show you! The printer just wants you to know that it's boss, you know? And after I calmed down-

Dan: You asserted dominance, yeah.

Phil: Gave it a bit of a stroke, I reconnected its settings and then it started printing for me. So I just had to apologise for getting so angry at it.

Dan: You showed that you were in charge-

Phil: Yeah.

Dan: And that's why you run the Tops Only Bar.

Phil: But, yeah, *giggles*, Phil will only turn into the IncrediPHIL Hulk on a printer, everything else I'm cool with.

Dan: Good to know.

The Home Invasion Incident

lines on paper, colour digital

I spent like?? 15 mins on the sketch?

I had a thought, I drew the thought