#lightning rambles

We all matter. We all have the same diagnosis. We all deserve to be treated with dignity and respect.

But we are not the same.

I can mask and might be seen as 'odd' or 'weird' in public. The students I work with are seen as 'dangerous' and 'practically little kids'.

I can go to university and work with accommodations. The students I work with likely will never live independently and a few might find jobs that support them but still pay them less than an abled worker.

I have full control of my finances. The students I work with aren't allowed to make independent financial decisions, even if capable.

If I say 'no,' I'm making a choice. The students I work with can't say 'no' without being labeled as defiant and difficult.

I can feed myself, bathe myself, and take care of myself with extreme challenges. The students I work with are unable to take care of themselves without high levels of support/one on one support.

I had an IEP in high school but was mainstreamed in classes. The students I work with take separate classes and some rarely get to interact with their abled peers.

Our experiences are fundamentally different. Higher support needs autistics will experience a specific type of ableism I never will, and can never fully understand.

Lower support needs autistics need to stop saying we understand what higher support needs autistics are going through and then present autism as only being disabling because of society/lack of acceptance because that is dangerous. We need to stop saying every autistic person is capable of everything if given the right support because that leaves out huge parts of our community who will never be able to do certain things, regardless of support.

We are worthy of existence regardless of our abilities.

One thing I'm noticing with back to school is how hard conversations are, especially with people who aren't familiar with my way of communicating, so I wanted to share a bit how you can support your AAC-using peers.

Acknowledge My Needs

You might think it's best practice not to mention I'm communicating differently, but for most of my classmates I find the opposite is true. Classmates don't know how to talk to me, or make assumptions that I won't need modifications in a conversation made, and then I get talked over and left out. Something you can do is politely ask about best practices. Phrases like "Hey, can I do anything to support your communication?" and "Do you need anything from me?" go a long way. Remember that these questions are not to sate your curiosity, but to provide me with an equitable space to communicate.

Give Me Time

In the fast-paced setting of university this is huge. The most common way I get left out of conversations is my peers talking too fast and moving on from subjects and topics before I can participate. Actively involve me! Ask me if I have anything to add. If you see me typing/selecting symbols, take your moment to wrap up your thought, and then glance over at me and wait for me to add on or shake my head to allow you to move on. If I don't have something to say once, don't assume that goes for every time. Regularly pause in conversations and create space for my input. I find I worry about slowing people down in conversations and the more you continuously make space the more I know I'm allowed to participate as an equal.

Involve My Contributions

Sometimes when I share something, it just gets ignored or not acknowledged. I have things to add to a conversation. Acknowledge what I share and build off of it. Have a conversation with me instead of letting me just say dead sentences that go nowhere. In return, I'll do my best to respond in turn and keep the conversation going.

Don't Interact With My Screen

Don't look at it, don't touch, don't move it. If it's in the way, ask if it's really in the way or if you can work around it. If it's in the way still, politely tell me. Unless I invite you to look at or interact with my screen, it should be for me only. Think of it as a brain and my thinking process.

Ask How I Want to Share

Sometimes when sharing with the class I prefer to write, sometimes I prefer to use AAC. If we are sharing back as a class, don't just say you will be the one to share back. Offer and include me in the discussion for options to share back. Understand when I say I don't want to, and if you're someone who's comfortable sharing feel free to volunteer to share for me if I want. Most importantly, respect what I say and listen to if I do or do not want to share back.

Let Me Have the Big Desk

If there's a larger desk in the classroom, let me use it. I need to have my AAC and my notebook and depending on the class sometimes a computer as well. I take up space and if there's extra room you don't need in a class, let me use it.

Go With the Flow

Sometimes I will vocally talk. Go with it. Don't question my ability or inability to talk sometimes. I am not here to sate your curiosity. Communicate with me at my level, how I choose to.

Hi, anon! Thanks for the note! Ahhh I love this question! The season 3 finale episode was my all-time favorite episode out of the series.

This is a really difficult question for me to answer because I think we see more of Alfor and Zarkon overall, and just small glimpses of Trigel, Gyrgan, and Blaytz.

In terms of the lesser known paladins, I really like Trigel because she seems like she knows how to have fun, and I love how she lovingly roasts her teammates.

From a complexity/character analysis standpoint, I probs think more about Zarkon’s backstory than I do any other OG pally. I’m very fascinated by how he wasn’t an ideal, unproblematic hero to start. For example, we have pretty clear indications that prior to the alliance, the Galra Empire was actively invading other worlds. Zarkon also def had a classicism issue, and he had never quite gotten over his interests in expanding Galran influence. But for a time, he did do some pretty redemptive, cool things with the other paladins to save their collective galaxy and build friendships.

I also like that the instant he saw Honerva, he turned into a tongue-tied himbo. And I also like that we saw an s8 Alternate Universe Zarkon who really did love his family and lived in peace with people.

So Zarkon’s probably the OG paladin I tend to focus most on and like to write about, simply because there’s just so much undertow and emotion there to explore.

I do also think there's an honorable mention for Alfor, because he was placed in an impossible, no-win situation, but he still tried to do what he felt was right and kept it together long enough to save what he could. And based on what he did to save Allura and others originally, I heavily question his portrayal in s8 where he just sits back and lets Allura do the heavy lifting. So I might have a more fanon version of Alfor in my head as we go along, but I did really like Alfor in the s3 finale.

Day 30 : What's something you want non-AAC users to know?

I think I want non-AAC users to know basic AAC ettiquette. Here are some examples:

Looking at an AAC users screen while we are typing is considered rude. Unless you ask and are given consent, you should avoid doing this.

Touching an AAC that is not yours without consent is a huge sign of disrespect. Avoid doing it at all costs, and if you have to for any reason, give a warning.

Let AAC users take their time. Don't rush us. AAC takes longer than mouth words.

Don't try and guess an AAC user's words. Just wait for them.

Some AAC users will stim, babble, or repeat words on their AAC device. This is natural and does not need to be stopped or fixed.

Want to talk about how much exhaustion is a part of disability. It affects everything I do. I am using AAC because of exhaustion. I am writing this in bed because of exhaustion. My whole life is exhaustion.

Below is a list of words I wish I had a symbol for because current symbols don’t represent what I hope to get from them, or the symbol doesn’t exist all together. Please feel to take inspiration from this list if you are looking for what AAC symbols to make, and feel free to tag me if you make them/find them.

Quick Fires

That sucks

That’s fantastic

Whatever

Wonderful

Verbs

Differentiate

Elaborate

Empathize

Equate

Facilitate

Peddle

Persuade

Pretend

Research

Savor

Specify

Spoil

Steal

Study

Tingle

Visualize

Describe

Ahead

Amazing

Amount

Annoying

Argumentative

Assertive

Awake

Health

Acute 

Bandage 

Bleeding

Cough

Date of birth

Flu

Infection

Pill 

Prescription 

Rash

Runny nose

Virus 

Politics

Bipartisan 

Caucus 

Colonization 

Constitution 

Democracy

Gerrymander

Lawsuit 

Patriot 

Running mate

Swing state

Tariff

Warrant 

Welfare 

Technology

Camera lens

Camera shutter

Ipod

Memory card

Micro SD card

Mp3 player

Photography

Radio

SD card

Stereo

Safety

Breathing issue

Heart issue

this is the part of being disabled that sucks.

i took my meds. i tried to stretch. i tried to rest. i got water. i got food, went to the bathroom, got in comfy clothes, cuddled my cat.

i did everything right.

i am still in pain.